2. Passion is another element of love. It is a state of mind eager to combine with each other, and it is a strong desire and demand. Passion and intimacy complement each other, but without real intimacy, this passion cannot last and its satisfaction is short-lived.
3. "Commitment" is the third element of love, just like a tripod, all three are indispensable. Commitment is the basis of maintaining love relationship and the decision of long-term existence of love. People who love each other are willing to overcome all difficulties and cultivate intimacy and passion. On the contrary, intimate and enthusiastic relationships also make the commitment more lasting.
The act of love:
Love will bring psychological changes to both parties in love, first of all, idealization. Two people in love will ignore each other's shortcomings and exaggerate each other's advantages. Idealization can convince both parties that they have made the right choice. The second is to endure pain. Even if the person you like refuses, this person will put up with the pain to justify the behavior of asking for nothing in return. The third is fantasy. People in love will have some fantasies about the future, even unrealistic fantasies.
In addition, love can also make a person highly sensitive, especially the emotional response to each other's behavior. This brings not only insecurity, but also satisfaction. The quality of love can be judged by the above characteristics. Love makes a person emotionally and physically dependent on another person.
In addition, exercise and sunshine are also good ways to treat lovelorn. At the same time, help the lovelorn to confirm the prize that love can bring in a relationship. Never overestimate your position in the other person's heart, and never underestimate the feelings and possessiveness of the other person.
In feelings, people are always in a state where the authorities are fascinated by the onlookers. Many things are difficult for you, but in the eyes of outsiders, they are actually very simple to handle.
Want to have a good relationship, not only depends on your sincerity, but also depends on your tacit understanding with each other.
I have always believed that a true lover is not sought after by you, but attracted by you.
It's like fate holding you together with a rope. You only need a chance to meet, and you can attract each other and keep drawing closer. Then next, of course, is the beginning of love.
But the beginning of love does not necessarily mean that this love is beautiful; On the contrary, you may have a bad emotional experience and become an emotional shadow in your life.
Therefore, how to get along is skillful.
Psychologist Robert Jeffrey Sternberg put forward a theory:
"Perfect love should have three elements: passion, intimacy and commitment."
This theory is a typical "triangular theory of love" in psychology.
Just as you two meet, you need some factors: time, place, feeling and emotion.
1
Perfect love needs "passion"
What is passion in love?
Let me tell you something about a relationship when I was young.
At that time, I fell in love with that girl from a long distance. The distance between us is over 300 kilometers. Every time I get off work before a holiday, the first thing I do is to drive to fill up the gas and then go to her city. Rain or shine, I was very relaxed and happy all the way.
At that stage, the long-distance love lasted almost 1 year, and more than half of the mileage of the car was for that girl; Why not let her come to my city by car? Because I'm not at ease.
In fact, when I was young, the pursuit and desire for love was a passion; That kind of passion is pure, not mixed with desire. You just want to see each other again. See you soon.
Then when you see each other, all you need is a firm hug, and all your fatigue and thoughts are displayed in front of you, which is real and touching.
Later, after I ended my long-distance relationship, I chose to go to her city to develop. But for some reason, we still can't be together.
After separation, no matter which girl I meet, I always lack that kind of passion. The girls you meet are also very nice and kind, but you don't have that kind of passion for love.
What do you say is one of the important factors in the beginning of a love? Actually, it's passion
The first time you met, you believed it was her.
She felt the same way when she first met you.
You are firm, hardworking, earnest and full of passion.
It's easy to meet someone you like, and it's easy to be liked. It's hard to meet someone who loves you very much.
2
Perfect love needs intimacy.
How can it be intimate between two people?
This kind of intimacy is not only physical intimacy, but also psychological and spiritual intimacy.
With each other, you feel safe, you can relax and be yourself; She can always guess what you think; You have similar views, similar hobbies, and even the taste of eating is very similar.
This is an intimate relationship.
When you two live together, you will not only feel bored, but also feel: God, how can there be someone like me?
You are lovers in love. When you are in love, you are free and unrestrained, thinking about romance. Even if we eat together, we should be extremely romantic.
But you are close friends, sharing each other's secrets, troubles, happiness and happiness.
The first thing to do for a raise and promotion is to send a message to the other party; If you are sad, you will also send messages to each other.
Good love must be inseparable from intimacy; Together, you are two of you, with greater strength and courage; When you are separated, you are no longer a complete you.
three
Perfect love is inseparable from "commitment"
What is the promise in love? To put it simply: your vision for the future can never be separated from each other's shadow.
All your plans for the future, whether at work or in society, are inseparable from each other; Everything you do is not for yourself, but for how to make you two better and better.
When you plan the next stage for yourself, you will also start to help each other imagine the plan; Your future can't be separated from her, and you should be in her future.
Only by giving each other some achievable promises often can your relationship become more targeted; With a clear goal, you can move in that direction and work together.
If there is only passion in a relationship, then this relationship is just desire; If there is only intimate relationship, then such feelings can only be regarded as good friends; It's just that the promise has not been fulfilled, and such feelings are nothing.
Want perfect love, can not do without these three elements: continuous passion, continuous intimacy.