Having a second child to realize that people will always be biased, bias on the child what kind of damage?

My husband and I have discussed whether to have a second child, my husband said not to have a second child, a baby is enough, people will always be eccentric, it is not possible to have a bowl of water to the end of the level. I think it's also true that there are two children, the oldest two cute, the oldest in the naughty, always can not help but scold him, look back at the small, found that the small obedient, unconsciously on the favor of the small.

Small online search, found that many experienced a second child netizens will have this kind of psychology, after reading is really very heartbreaking big baby.

1, I am eighty years later, there is a younger brother, as a child super understanding will take care of the younger brother, but the parents are still particularly biased younger brother, relatives and friends have said to parents: you are too biased small, refused to admit at the time, they are still now so think. Monthly subsidized home to the younger brother ......,but a doctor has something to look for me, I have been helping, who called me the eldest, so resolutely not two children, too eccentric really hurt the child's mind!

2, my big sister before only one time, always a little baby baby called her son, and then the second child came, the little baby is to call the small, often said to the big hate to beat you to death, and then got on the hand, became available quickly.

3, simply can not be a bowl of water end of the level, especially the oldest two just to fall asleep the oldest one yells to wake up, instantly on the gas, I do not have the oldest one is also thinking about the oldest one can not lose, but now found on the oldest one really thing can not hold back the anger ah, my oldest one is a boy the oldest one is a girl, and I'm not a good mother.

4, really can not give birth to a second child, my big one is beaten and scolded every day, can not control! I've been looking at the oldest and thinking about it, and I really feel sorry for him! Now the little one is only three months! I'm not sure how many times I'll have to go to the doctor's office to see a doctor! I don't know how many beatings I'm going to get in the future!

5, I feel that if I gave birth to a second child, there should not be the first with the oldest so carefully, may be really the oldest according to the book, the oldest according to the pig to raise, the first child, at first, also think it is the only child, the expenditure of effort, energy is not comparable.

6, how can a bowl of water end flat? A person's energy is limited. After taking care of the second one, the first one will definitely not be as patient! I know this from personal experience as a child. My mother was so busy with work, housework, and taking care of my sister that I couldn't even listen to you properly. That's why I refused to have a second child. Although I am older now and have a better relationship with my sister, I don't want my child to be left without a full mother's love as I was when I was a child. One child will be raised well!

7. I'm also afraid that I'm biased in favor of the younger one, so I'd rather not have a second child. Otherwise, I'm too sorry for the big baby. When the child is married, we two old, have the money to travel travel, no money on the square dance, why bother to spend their lives on raising children.

8, know how, how can all like. Even if the pro-life, can be compared to a good or bad. The first thing that you need to do is to get a good deal of money to pay for the services you need.

What kind of damage does parental favoritism do to children?

1. If the parents are biased in favor of the child, the child will be proud of himself and it will be very easy for him to form a strong and unreasonable habit.

2. A child whose parents don't love him or her will feel physically and mentally depressed, lose self-confidence, and be reluctant to trust others.

3, eccentric parents, easy to let some children have no respect, do not take elders in the eye, and some children and resentment, thus producing harm.

4, parents eccentric family, the children are not united, one side of the brutal, one side of the jealousy, the force is not two forces, ignoring the love of brother and sister.

5, parents eccentric, the child will grow up not understand filial piety, lack of love, from childhood pampered children always have a dependence on their parents, is not conducive to his self-reliance, on the contrary, they will be selfish and self-interested.

6. There is a Chinese saying that "it's not the lack of money that matters, but the lack of balance". Very often, what people are fighting for is not material things, but the right to be respected.

How to minimize the damage of eccentricity?

1. Do not advocate that one party must give way to the other.

2. Let children solve their own problems.

3. Do not compare the two children.

4. Balanced distribution of resources and honesty.

So the second child is not your condition can be born, born out of the big baby is also responsible for the big baby, so must be more to take into account the psychology of the big baby. We psychologically think that the little one does not understand, the big one has been a little bit of understanding, can not sympathize with the mother, will always be unable to control the angry at him. In fact, the child may just want to get the attention of the mother in this way, although we can not do 100% not biased, but try not to be too obvious, more care for the big baby, more communication with the big baby, more let the big baby involved in the care of the second baby, so that he psychologically agree that this is his loved ones, to him on his younger siblings, mom love.