First,? Is it hot? harm
People say that as long as two people love each other, it should be warm and intense. They have to be passionate all the time, and the relationship between them has been hot for a long time, which will reflect the proper feeling of love. This is sincere love and people's ideal love. In fact, this is a very wrong cognition and consciousness. Take our common sense of life as an example. If we touch the right temperature, people will touch it. No matter how high the temperature is, people can't stand it. If it is overheated, people will avoid it for fear of scalding or burning. For a person, if the temperature exceeds the body temperature, it means that life is sick, and so is love.
There was once a young couple who were inseparable and stuck together all day. As soon as the boys left, the girls kept calling and texting, or kept asking questions to control each other's every move. It was nothing at first, but we broke up soon. The reason for breaking up is that boys can't accept the excesses of girls. Passion? . There is also a couple, two college classmates, who are vigorous and passionate when they are in love. Finally, they agreed to keep their passion in love even after marriage, so that their feelings would be hot. At the beginning of their marriage, they will hug and kiss each other at work like their first lovers, and there will be flowers and gifts on holidays and birthdays. They always do anything, not candlelight dinners and movies at night, but karaoke bars and cafes. Later, under the influence and interference of many practical affairs at work and family, the ideal and reality collided strongly, and they began to be unable to adapt, leading to constant contradictions and even quarrels. Later, due to the escalation of contradictions, loving couples, husbands actually moved their hands on their wives, and finally parted ways because of love and hate. Are they in this hot relationship? Burn? I met each other,
Second,? Cold? harm
What did we say above? Is it hot? And then talk about the other extreme? Cold? As we all know, people hate the cold and are afraid of it. No one wants to stay in a cold place and environment. They will avoid the cold environment, just like in the world of love. People who love each other are heartless. They don't care about each other, don't care about each other, and are silent to each other, so that their communication is reduced to a minimum, and they are indifferent in front of each other, or? Cold violence? Constantly snubbing each other, refusing to make concessions to each other, and even committing domestic violence against each other, in this kind of mental abuse and physical injury, people feel only rare indifference, just like being in a domestic violence? Ice cave? Generally, people who love each other like this will sooner or later? Frozen? It hurts. It hurts in my heart.
There was a couple who had a good relationship when they first got married, but as life went on, they always liked to follow the fashion. They don't think that their husbands can't make big money or complain that they have no rights. They are often cynical, or cynical about their husbands. No matter how tired and hard you are when you are away, you never care about asking questions when you come back. When my husband is in a bad mood, he ignores them and is always cynical. My husband often prefers to find a place to stay outside rather than go home. My husband told a friend that others said that my home was warm, and I felt very cold, especially cold. There are many couples in life who can't feel the beauty of any marriage in an indifferent family environment, and some even break up their marriage.
Third,? Is it suitable? wonderful
If in marriage, two people can care and take care of each other, show their concern and concern for the other half in a timely manner, and at the same time understand and tolerate each other. Don't always try to control each other. For the so-called selfish love, they will control each other in their own hands and give each other moderate space and freedom. They each have their own life content, do what they like, and be tolerant and calm when they encounter differences and contradictions. Don't conflict and hurt each other in words and deeds. When they have time, they should strengthen communication, express their wishes and listen to each other's voices, so as to understand and master each other's ideas and needs, know themselves and communicate with each other.