This is a time of universal anxiety.
Whether it is a newcomer with a monthly salary of 5,000, or an executive with a monthly salary of 50,000, everyone is as anxious as an ant on a hot pan.
"Tomorrow we have a meeting to report on the work, so nervous, can't sleep tonight ......"
"I have to get this done right away, or it will be too late! "
"I'm already facing a mid-life crisis, what should I do?"
"I'm almost 30 and I'm only earning 3,000 a month, do I have any upside?"
"I want to be a project manager next year and strive to start my own business the year after, how can I do that?"
"I feel like I'm a dead duck, I've been left far behind by my peers, and when I think about it, I get anxious and angry."
.......
Don't these feelings sound familiar? There are a million kinds of anxiety in the world, and there's always one for you.
On the surface, these anxieties are just an emotional manifestation, but if they go on for a long time, they can bring about many adverse effects:
● Low productivity at work
● Deterioration of interpersonal relationships
● Negative impacts on your life
● Increased susceptibility to disease, leading to illness.
......
In today's fast-paced and information-exploding society, anxiety has inevitably become the label of the times, and everyone struggles with it.
When you open your cell phone, there are people selling anxiety, and there are people teaching you to fight anxiety. There are also numerous courses and books about anxiety on the market, and even on the stage of TED Talks, there are speakers who use their own personal experiences to teach you to eliminate anxiety and gain inner peace.
These various forms of chicken soup may temporarily help you forget the feeling of anxiety, but after a long time you will find that the deep sense of anxiety is actually always there. The reason for this is that we do not have a deep enough knowledge of anxiety itself.
What exactly is anxiety? How to eliminate the root cause of our inner anxiety?
The best-selling book Work Without Anxiety not only analyzes the nature of anxiety from the perspective of psychology and management, and takes us out of the cognitive misunderstanding, but also provides a revolutionary solution to anxiety.
This book is not chicken blood, not to mention chicken soup, but really from a scientific and rational point of view to take you out of anxiety, return to the positive self.
Dr. Derek Rodger, a renowned psychologist who has been involved in anxiety causation research for more than 30 years, and Nick Petrie, a senior trainer at the Center for Innovative Leadership in the U.S., joined forces to challenge traditional perceptions of anxiety and resilience, and came up with a formula to cause anxiety: Stress + Tangled = Anxiety, and a four-step solution to break the habit of tangled, which is easy to do and easy to teach you. easy to implement, hand in hand to teach you to break the spell of anxiety.
1. Re-conceptualize anxiety
Usually we think that anxiety is caused by stress, and that it is the people and things in the outside world that cause our anxiety.
But research by one of the authors of this book, Dr. Derek Roger (RN Chartered Psychologist and leader in the field of anxiety management research), has shown that anxiety is caused by obsessions.
He found that there are eight key behaviors that determine whether a person is anxious, the most important of which is whether the individual has a tendency to ruminate, that is, whether the individual has the personality trait of chewing over painful memories on a regular basis. As he wrote in his book, anxiety is your reaction to events, not the events themselves, the events are not the reason why people feel anxious, people themselves are induced by external events to cope with the way is the most fundamental reason.
In fact, daily life makes you feel "anxious" situation, most of them are just stress, but when you increase the key factors "entangled", especially back and forth to think about the things that make them distressed, stress is easily converted into anxiety. It's a good idea to get a little more involved in the process.
Pressure+rumination = stress.
For example, if you're late for work, do you accept the fact that you're late and try to get things done as quickly and efficiently as possible, or do you feel guilty that you're late, and feel bad about your behavior, and worry about the consequences? Are you impatient to run a red light on your way to work? Are you complaining about the driver in front of you, why is he still slow when the signal is turning green?
This is turning stress into anxiety. Your anxiety doesn't help, the signal won't be green for you all the way because you're in a hurry, the driver won't be able to drive faster because you're complaining, and nothing will change the fact that you overslept and are late.
You might say: Just because I have an important meeting to attend, it's not surprising that I'm so anxious. Is that really the case? Not only are you anxious, but you can always justify it. The truth is that it's very simple: you overslept in the morning, and now you're late, and that's it.
So discovering the causes of obsessions and how to avoid them is at the heart of how we cope with anxiety.
2. Cultivate your resilience
No one is born with a habit of obsessing; obsessing is a behavior we acquire later in life. Precisely because tangling is a habit, it can be changed. We need to train ourselves to avoid tangles and thus stay away from anxiety, and we need to develop our resilience first.
Resilient people don't get anxious, or more accurately, resilient people don't dwell, they don't pointlessly dwell on their worries. That's why, in the face of the same situation, some people will be anxious, some people are calm, this book for us to find the answer: the fundamental reason is the different personal resilience.
What is resilience?
"Resilience can be defined as the ability to cross the rapids of life calmly."
Let's say you're drifting in the midst of a thrilling wave, you've just passed through a stretch of turbulent water, and after making a turn, you're greeted by a wide expanse of calm water. At this moment, you can hear the rapids rushing ahead and the sound of the water getting louder, but a cliff in front of you is blocking your view, preventing you from seeing what's coming around the next bend.
How would you feel at this moment?
Even if you don't have to experience it yourself, you can imagine the relaxation of being in calm waters, but what else is there? Excitement, exhilaration, and perhaps anxiety and fear about the challenges that lie beyond the cliffs.
A river is a fitting metaphor for life. In the river of life, few people stay in the turbulence for long, and even the toughest years eventually pass. Likewise, few would say they have been in tranquil waters. Life is a constant process of shifting between peaceful rivers and turbulent currents.
So if you are in tranquility at the moment, then you are bound to welcome the turbulence of life, but turbulence doesn't mean anxiety, and moving from tranquility into the next turbulent waters of the river of life, you may be welcomed with stress rather than anxiety, and stress is simply the requirement to perform a task.
Stress is good for people because it increases their motivation, but at least half of them go into a state of panic as they enter the next turbulent water. As a result, their rafts capsize, and eventually they will lose their chance to pass through this water. This is an example of turning stress into anxiety.
Resilient people don't lose their judgment.
At the same time, resilience can be acquired, a skill that can be acquired through training and practice.
In addition to the idea of resilience thinking, this book also describes the development of resilient leadership and how to use resilience thinking to improve team performance for leaders in organizations.
3. Scientific and effective solutions
After clarifying the nature of anxiety and that "resilience can be acquired through deliberate practice", how do we cultivate our own resilience, so that we don't get entangled?
The book gives a four-step solution: from awakening to focus, then to transcendence, and finally release, combing the theory behind, step by step, to guide us to build a resilient mindset, flexibly adjust themselves to adapt to the turbulent, unpredictable, complex and ambiguous environment, break the habit of anxiety, and become a high-performance person.
The first step is to wake up
When people are awake, they also fall into sleep, that is, "waking up and sleeping" state. This daydreaming state of distraction, coupled with obsessive worrying, can lead to anxiety. This is why you need to wake yourself up and stay truly awake for longer periods of time.
There are different forms of wakefulness, but the most effective is "presence of mind," which means focusing the mind on the here and now, not ruminating on past sufferings or worrying about future situations, but focusing on the present. Instead of rumoring about past sufferings and worrying about future circumstances, one keeps one's attention on what is happening in the present.
To "deliberate" rather than to "dwell".
You can consciously and purposefully plan for the future based on the past and the present, a process called "reflection.
Step 2: Focus
Focus and arousal happen almost simultaneously, and you can't focus unless you're aroused. Realize that we have the ability to stay awake and be able to get work done with purpose and awareness.
Once you have "awakened" yourself, you can use the power of "focus". People have a limited amount of energy in a day, and "multitasking" is simply switching energy between tasks, rather than cutting or spreading it out across tasks.
Focus your energy on what you and your team can control or influence to cope with the overload, complexity, and constant flux between them.
The third step is to be transcendent
Being transcendent is not about avoiding things. Ideas will always come to us automatically, and instead of blocking them out, we need to look at them objectively and recognize that they are just ideas.
"Transcendence" (detachment) does not mean detachment, disinterest, or disengagement, but rather an ability to look at things objectively. Only when one is transcendent can one be deliberate and not inclined to become entangled.
Dealing with the stressors of daily life, which can almost always be resolved into trivialities, makes objectivity all the more important. To maintain the "focus" of step 2 and the "transcendental" ability to see things objectively in step 3, we can't do it without -
Step 4, release
Everyone faces different life situations, and you may say that what is said in the book is right, but is it really that easy to put it into practice? For example, can someone with cancer just so easily not be anxious?
Nick, one of the authors of this book, is a cancer survivor. Since the age of 25, he has been diagnosed with various types of cancer, and has been declared by his doctors to be "dying" many times. Now in his 30s, he has four lovely children under the age of seven. He still faces the curse of "not much time left" every day, but his mood is not affected at all.
This book is written with heart and life, and I believe it can help you to face the pressure of any environment with ease, turn pressure into motivation, and stay away from anxiety, so that you can become a positive and sunny person full of positive energy.
Anxiety is normal, that you have ideas, goals have not been achieved, and feel that the time is not enough, the opportunity did not come, the things around you or the situation is not satisfied, in fact, anxiety in the current society is very normal, I am also in the anxiety, the actual feeling of the hot water, I often describe myself as such, the coordinates of Hangzhou surrounding the city of Deqing, Hangzhou in 16 years, after the G20 loan to buy a suite. After the G20 loan to buy a suite, last year spent 500,000 decorated, and now extremely regret, I should have known to buy another loan a suite, now prices are soaring ... ... before the time to buy 3 times, and now prices fell, the beginning of the year will be nearly 4 times, and now see a set of villas towards the dream, everything is the way I like it, private gardens, a large balcony, each room is a suite, the ground floor, the underground two floors, three floors above ground, style, location, and the way I like it. Three floors above ground, style, location, floor, are the most satisfied, went to see today, the price is much more than the budget, to 6.6 million gross, I immediately anxious, depressed ... feel red, headache, sore throat, mood is not good ...
Anxiety is serious, it is recommended that you go to the hospital to receive treatment.
Anxiety, insomnia, depression, which is progressive and affect each other. According to research, depression patients, more than 80% will have anxiety, insomnia symptoms. And anxiety and insomnia, in turn, can trigger depression.
I know an old Chinese doctor, he dealt with depression prescription, is the first to regulate insomnia, anxiety, no matter how serious insomnia, anxiety, the same day to see the effect, a few hundred dollars to get it done.
Anxiety disorders, also known as anxiety neurosis, is one of the most common disorders in the broad category of neurological disorders, characterized by the experience of anxiety.
Anxiety is an inner turmoil or unfounded fear that lacks an obvious objective cause, and is an emotional response that occurs when people experience something such as a challenge, difficulty, or danger. Moderate anxiety allows you to increase your efficiency and be mentally prepared to do that thing better. Excessive anxiety, however, can take your breath away and can make you feel tense, distressed, angry, and irritable. Chronic over-anxiety can lead to the development of an anxiety disorder (a neurological condition), which affects both physical and mental health.
Classification of anxiety disorders:
In the United States diagnostic criteria for mental disorders, anxiety disorders are broad, including generalized anxiety, acute anxiety attacks, phobias, post-traumatic stress disorder, acute stress disorder, and obsessive-compulsive disorder.
1, generalized anxiety (chronic anxiety):
(1) Emotional symptoms in the absence of obvious triggers, the patient often appears with the reality of the situation does not match the excessive worry, tension and fear, this tension and fear often do not have a clear object and content. Patients feel that they have been in a kind of nervousness, worry, fear, fear, worry in the inner experience.
(2) vegetative symptoms dizziness, chest tightness, panic, shortness of breath, dry mouth, frequent urination, urinary urgency, sweating, tremor and other somatic symptoms.
(3) Motor restlessness fidgeting, restlessness, irritability, it is difficult to be still.
2. Acute Anxiety Attacks (Panic Attacks, Panic Disorder)
(1) A sense of near death or a sense of loss of control In normal daily life, the patient is almost like a normal person. But once the attack (some have specific trigger situations, such as closed space, etc.), the patient suddenly appeared extremely fearful, experiencing a sense of near death or a sense of loss of control.
(2) The symptoms of the vegetative nervous system appear at the same time, such as chest tightness, panic, dyspnea, sweating, shivering and so on.
(3) Generally lasts from a few minutes to a few hours seizures start suddenly and the seizure is conscious.
(4) It is very easy to misdiagnose an attack, and patients often call the "120" emergency number and go to the emergency department of cardiology. Although the patient seems to be very serious symptoms, but the relevant test results are mostly normal, so the diagnosis is often unclear. After the attack, the patient is still extremely fearful, worried about their own condition, often bouncing around the major hospitals and departments, do a variety of tests, but can not be diagnosed. This is not only a delay in treatment but also a waste of medical resources.
3. phobias (including social phobia, place phobia, specific phobia)
The core manifestation of phobias and acute anxiety attacks are the same as panic attacks. The difference is that anxiety attacks in phobias are caused by certain specific places or situations, and the patient does not experience anxiety when not in those specific places or situations. Examples include fear of social situations or human interaction, or fear of certain environments: airplanes, plazas, crowded places. The onset of anxiety in phobias is often predictable, and patients tend to adopt avoidance behaviors to avoid anxiety attacks.
Treatment and Improvement of Anxiety Disorders
Anxiety disorders are among the neurological disorders that are relatively well-treated and have a better prognosis. For moderate to severe anxiety disorders, it is best to use a combination of medication and psychological counseling to treat both the symptoms and the root cause. For patients with mild or moderate anxiety disorders, professional and systematic psychological counseling can be healed. Since 2008, the Guangzhou Hearing Bar Psychological Counseling Center has been helping thousands of visitors suffering from anxiety disorders out of their predicament based on the service concept of "professionalism, rigor, attentiveness, and integrity". We believe that people will have the desire to grow and will always be willing to become a better person. When anxiety sufferers find the hidden conflicts within, truly resolve them, and learn to adopt a better way to deal with their inner loneliness, madness, and lost love, they will be able to reap the benefits of inner wholeness, maturity, and peace of mind.
Hear it, hear it, hear it, hear it Reminder: Because of the influence of the life environment, we are always contrary to what we want to be, so the inner conflict is constant. We may use all kinds of ways to eliminate the conflict, but many times we fall into deeper fear, anxiety and despair, and neurosis problems. In the face of this situation, it is important to seek professional help, professional analysis and guidance will reduce a person's feelings of despair, fear and hostility, and help us to improve our personality, to become a more complete, more mature, more peaceful inner self.
Anxiety = Dissatisfaction with one's present + Worry about the future
Due to the deep influence of our life environment, we are always contrary to what we want to be, and thus there is constant inner conflict.
We may use all kinds of ways to eliminate the conflict, but many times we instead fall into deeper fear, anxiety and despair, and develop neurotic problems.
How to relieve excessive anxiety?
1. Dealing with fear
We can try to regulate our fear from the vegetative side through exercise and positive thinking. For example, jogging, yoga, can increase the brain's dopamine and endorphins, so that we calm and relax. And through exercise, the circuits in the brain for positive emotions increase, helping us to resist fear. And many clinical trials and studies have shown that positive thoughts are particularly effective in intervening with anxiety.
2. Regaining a sense of control
(1) When we feel fear, the object of our fear is often vague and chaotic. Concreteness means that you take this vague thing and describe it in a clear and visible way.
By thinking back to when you felt anxious, what were the details besides time, place, and people, what moment did you start to feel anxious, what did you do and think about when you were anxious, and so on. By making these specifics, it is possible to reflect on and become aware of the whole event, so that the whole thing is no longer a chaotic mess. In this process, one can become aware of the whole thing in its fullness and detail, and one can become aware of one's own emotions. It is when one becomes more familiar and aware of oneself, of the object of one's anxiety, that one feels more in control, and that one can eliminate anxiety.
(2) Generally anxious people, the mind is stuffed with a variety of things, at a time will think about many things at once. When all things are thought about and done together, they often become anxious. This is the time when you need to make a prioritization of all the things you want to do. Focus on accomplishing one thing first and then do the rest. We often encounter multitasking situations at work. We need to make sure that we prioritize the important things. Pick the highest priority among all the tasks, focus on it first, and then move on to the next one when it's done. Do them one by one. This will not only give you a sense of accomplishment and positive motivation in completing the task, but it will also help to alleviate your anxiety considerably.
(3) Anxiety is stronger when we are faced with some longer-term, more difficult tasks. The way to relieve anxiety, then, is to make plans and dismantle goals. Make plans to split from top to bottom, first set the big goal of the whole project, and then split the big goal into small goals. Define the metrics to be used in reaching each of the big and small goals, the deadlines, the means by which the goals will be met, etc. Splitting the big goal into smaller goals makes the goal clearer and more actionable, making the whole task feel more manageable and thus easing anxiety. Leave some surplus time between the smaller goals to allow time for unexpected events, or else you'll become panicked and thus more anxious when an unexpected event occurs. After completing each small goal, give yourself a reward, such as a vacation, a good meal, and a party with friends. By doing this, you can relieve the stress and anxiety of the phase, and on the other hand, you are giving yourself a positive incentive. Encourage yourself to meet the next stage of work with a more positive mood and state.
Only through suffering do we realize that health is the greatest blessing in our lives, and any suffering that doesn't kill you will make you stronger.
I'll share some ways to overcome anxiety
1. If anxiety is severe and you can't walk out by adjusting yourself, you need to take the time to find a psychiatrist for treatment. Many people feel that psychological anxiety is not a disease, their own adjustment can come out, but unfortunately their own adjustment is not good when you need to pay attention to, some people think to see a psychiatrist is a very shameful thing, in fact, this is all stereotypes, the modern society, everyone has a little bit of a psychological problem, mental illness and physical illness is not much difference, all need to be treated by a doctor.
2: the medicine to take the medicine, and the psychiatrist to communicate with the positive communication, so that the psychiatrist can be the right medicine, as soon as possible to help you please anxiety.
3: active sports
Sports are very helpful in relieving anxiety, spend an hour a day running sports, sweat a sweat, the body will secrete dopamine, dopamine is a kind of happy mood hormone, on the relief of anxiety has a lot of benefits.
4: Accept your own ordinary imperfection
Many times we stress and anxiety are because we do not reach their own imagination, and constantly force themselves to pursue impossible goals, so that anxiety comes. In fact, not everything in this world you can do, to understand that there are some things you can not change, there are some things your efforts are not rewarded. Accept your shortcomings, change your mindset, and nothing is worth mentioning in front of life and death.
Finally, more questions need to be answered can refer to the picture above in the lower left corner of the watermark, welcome in the public number: bedtime night listening, and I share exchanges.
"Every night at nine o'clock, know love more understand you"
Anxiety on the road, you're not alone
There was a survey on the Internet: young people are now anxious? What are they anxious about?
The data shows that 96% of people are anxious about something, and 54% of them are anxious every day
"Anxiety" has become the hottest issue in society today.
So, first of all, you need to know that anxiety is our normal, calm your mind about it, don't feel particularly anxious because you are anxious.
In the face of anxiety, we can what do something?
1. Acceptance
As mentioned above, accept the fact that we are anxious, do not be afraid of it, appropriate anxiety, in fact, can push us forward, may wish to be quiet, to their own anxiety, each of which is recorded, analyze, in the end, the main source of our anxiety in those areas, family, money, health, relationships? Think about it, what is the root cause of your anxiety? Is there really no solution? What are the steps to take?
2. Break down anxiety and improve control over things
Most of us are anxious because we feel that things are out of control, we can break down these anxieties into small tasks, and accomplish them little by little, some of the anxiety is in the imagination to become bigger and bigger. As long as you take action, with the first step, the idea of the second step will come naturally. Instead of sitting on your ass, get moving. Don't always think that you have too many problems and too little ability to solve them, in fact, all of us are the same.
3. Choose not to run away
Anxiety comes from being dissatisfied with the present and not being satisfied with ourselves. We need to step out of the comfort zone, keep curiosity about the world, slowly you will realize that the world is really clear, need you to learn a lot of places, to meet these challenges, just as we play the game breakthrough, the more you play the more excited. If you think you can't break through, it may be too difficult, reduce the difficulty appropriately, or find tips online to see how others face this anxiety.
4, move up
Move up can be sports, in sports, you have your own goals, limbs follow your goals, thoughts can go to think about your anxiety, with the release of the body dopamine, your thoughts will become more and more positive.
Moving up can also be when doing housework, the family's annoyance, chores, do a break away.
If you feel anxious, it's because a better you beckons
''Anxiety'' is a symptom of neurasthenia, neurosis. Insomnia and dreams, upset, sighing, palpitations and weakness, low effectiveness at work as a manifestation of sub-health state.
On this phenomenon:
(a) correctly face the reality, correct thinking, do not expect too much from themselves, do not compare, low-profile work.
(b) participate in more social activities, more friends, more exchanges, more sports, square dancing, walking, etc. can relax tension, relieve social and work pressure!
(c) have the conditions to go out with a partner to travel, contact with nature, observe the beauty of the lyrics of emotion, relaxation, release the pressure!
(d) to relieve depression and tranquilize the mind, Chinese medicine orally, men and women menopause can be based on different seasons and symptoms of licensing to take the relative symptoms of the drug.
(E) acupuncture, massage related points.
Since we are talking about anxiety, it must have confirmed that they are (anxiety). Serious to seek medical attention, such as no cause for panic, fidgeting, trembling, sweating, palpitations and so on! I won't go into that here.
We will focus on self-intervention for mild to moderate anxiety!
First, anxiety is not causative, but there are generally chronic environmental factors, such as marital (romantic) relationship disharmony, interpersonal tensions, work and life stress,, facing promotion, employment, business, livelihood running around, etc., this pressure is often long-term, can not be immediately resolved, so it is necessary to actively deal with.
The most important thing is to recognize the relationship between goals and reality, that is, the principle of living within one's means, after all, at the expense of health to achieve some of the so-called cause is not wise.
Second, our personal power is always limited, it is impossible to do all the things, the appropriate time to know how to seek help is an excellent advantage. Similarly, we can never make everyone satisfied, so fully mobilize the team's initiative and prioritize, rationalize the sequence is also very important.
Third, the plan is very important, many of us will not do the plan. Live to understand the people must not be outside factors to make a mess. Ideal and goal to be clear, haha! Long-term goals laid out in advance, the near future also need to have an advance, and do a good job of risk assessment, to confirm that they can afford the maximum loss. It's also best to have the courage to start over! Know how to let go when necessary!
Fourth, even if you do a good job in the above aspects, there may still be beyond the psychological expectations of the results, we are anxious! What to do?
Say a few principles: 1. Sleep well (the benefits of a good night's sleep will not be mentioned), a reasonable work and rest, relaxation training, foot baths are good for sleep (serious need to be dealt with by a professional doctor). 2. exercise and fitness, help our body to regulate the mood of the neurotransmitters are more balanced, contributing to the physiological function and the metabolic cycle. 3! It is very important to find trusted friends to talk about their own state of mind and difficulties, to clean up the negative emotions, and to seek help from formal psychological counseling (treatment) institutions if possible
Finally, if the above measures are still not alleviated, you should go to a professional hospital in a timely manner to check and confirm the diagnosis and treatment.
The first thing you need to do is to get rid of the problem.
① Do what interests you most. For example, watching sports, playing chess, practicing calligraphy, playing mahjong and so on. Do what you love. Pull your thoughts from one "house" to another "house" that you are very confident and favorite.
② Do a moderate amount of exercise. For example, ride a bike, play basketball, run, and so on. A good way to transfer anxiety is to walk briskly. The purpose is to make the skeletal muscle movement, the brain rest. Let the "anxiety" fall asleep.
③ Reading. As long as you can think in the rhythm of the book. Let the book to replace the anxiety of entanglement. In today's world of cell phone screens, don't forget to get into the habit of reading.
④ Listen to music. Starting from the music melody, appreciate it, might as well follow the hum a few lines, the effect is very good. The habit of appreciating music is not only tasteful, but also useful for a lifetime.
⑤ Doing heavy labor. If the above activities can not let go of your anxiety, you may want to do heavy labor. Don't say you can't find something to do, go move bricks!