When the 80's daughter-in-law encountered traditional mother-in-law

Mother gave birth to me late, I got married late, so, by me this intermediary set up a family, there is a pair of nearly 50 years of difference between mother-in-law and daughter-in-law combination - mother-in-law was born in the 1930s, daughter-in-law was born in the 80s. Such a huge age difference, in the "outlook on life", "world view" on how can there be no difference? Fortunately, this pair of mother-in-law and daughter-in-law are not small-minded people, coupled with the "intergenerational pro" effect also seems to be in this special "grandchildren" on the role, I was lucky not to be "rolled flat head". I was lucky not to be "flattened". To summarize the concept of the two collision, involving all aspects of the big and small, try to cite a number of examples are as follows.　First of all, from the details of life in the "eat" one of the things to say. In order to rush to work, hurry, daughter-in-law often to a bowl of instant noodles, a guest small wontons to pass off lunch or even dinner. But once free, centered down, its petty face revealed. Whether they cook or go out on the restaurant, daughter-in-law must pursue the dishes on the color and flavor, taste, knife skills, color and lustre can not be less, it is best to have a little atmosphere. A moment is "coarse bran omnivorous", a moment is "food is not too fine", the mother-in-law of the daughter-in-law of the elasticity of such a great dietary view of the inexplicable, worried about the years will not be the stomach, the body to eat bad? But the daughter-in-law feels that this is one of the symbols of their own generation can bend and stretch!　In doing housework, the two also have different opinions. Although she is over old, her mother-in-law still insists on doing laundry, mopping the floor and wiping the furniture every day. The daughter-in-law flung out 200 yuan and contracted out the chores to a bellhop, and spent the freed up time practicing yoga and doing SPA. My mother-in-law shook her head, "Why spend money on practicing kung fu outside? Why don't you do more chores around the house if you want to get in shape? Isn't this two birds with one stone to save two dollars? Look at you 20-somethings, your faces are pale, your bodies are not as good as mine, and your appetites are not as good as mine, so you can do more housework yourself and have no problems!" The daughter-in-law smiled but did not answer.　My mother-in-law's life has been through the trials and tribulations of the times, the war, the civil war, the "Cultural Revolution", but only in her career is stable and ordinary, in a unit from green silk to gray hair. Daughter-in-law has never tasted poverty and hunger and the taste of fear and anxiety, but it is in the employment process suffered a lot of ups and downs, from the state-owned enterprises to foreign enterprises, from personnel to procurement, either by the boss fired squid, or their own boss fired squid. Grandma prays every day that her daughter-in-law will be able to stabilize, preferably like herself, "from the end" to retirement. The daughter-in-law politely explained: It's not that I don't want to settle down, it's that the current situation is forcing us to change and develop!　There is also the most important issue of having children. Perhaps through the daughter-in-law this "window", "today's situation" has a shallow to deep understanding, very loving mother-in-law, in recent years in the "next generation" on the idea of a sudden change! She often says, "Of course children are cute, and they look great in your arms. However, raising a child from childhood to adulthood puts a lot of pressure on the family in terms of finances, energy and education! Moreover, children from ordinary families like ours will face fierce competition for education and employment in the future. I really can't bear to let both adults and children suffer!" The traditional mother-in-law actually has a subversive understanding of the issue of children and grandchildren. Interestingly, the daughter-in-law of the new era recognizes the necessity of raising the next generation in a new light. She believes that: childbearing and childrearing is indeed very bitter and annoying, and to be forever "set", but this is an indispensable part of life, sweet, sour, bitter and spicy flavors to be experienced once, it is not in vain to live a life. What's more, "raising children to prevent old age" concept has fallen out of fashion, even if there are children and grandchildren, in the future in the economy and life will not be dependent on the younger generation, the old couple will still be in the old people's home, but in the twilight of the day, there is a pro flesh and blood to let their hearts hang on to, which is more than the material needs of the more important comfort heh!　"A generation of people have a generation of ideological concepts, ways of doing things, regardless of the old experience, or new ideas, each with its own advantages and disadvantages, stand the test of practice, in line with the scientific concept of development, is correct and reasonable! This comment sounds reasonable, in fact, I understand in my own heart, which has a "paste" component. Being a son, husband, age in the "after 30" and "after 80" between me if I do not ride the wall, how to be good? Not to offend both sides, based on the facts to speak, which is precisely my high tactics to avoid the risk of splints also!　When the 80s daughter-in-law encountered the traditional mother-in-law 2 Huanhuan and Lele is a pair of "80s" young couple, male Huanhuan older female Lele three years old. The two degree is equivalent, looks like a good match, know less than a year, on both sides of the parents under the arrangements of the marriage. According to the newlyweds should be the happiest part of the girl, but Lele is often troubled.　The cause is the mother-in-law.　Huanhuan's parents married late, in their words, **** and the country's great storms a did not fall: when I was a child caught up in the Great Disasters do not have enough to eat, the study and caught up in the Cultural Revolution, did not learn how much culture in the countryside, it was not easy to go back to the city to find a job, and then caught up in the marriage and family planning. When my mother-in-law gave birth to Huanhuan, she was already in her thirties. Although the standard of living of the whole society was not high at that time, Huanhuan's parents felt that they had suffered all their lives, and they must let their son enjoy the best possible material life. Huanhuan grew up in such an atmosphere, and to this day, his parents are still "holding him in their hands for fear of dropping him, and holding him in their mouths for fear of melting him".　Lele as the city grew up as an only child, also enjoyed the treatment of a princess.　After the two of them are good, to see both parents. The first time to see the mother-in-law, each other's impression is okay. The mother-in-law thinks that Lele is very understanding, Lele thinks that her mother-in-law is very kind. But after a long day, Lele has a problem with her mother-in-law.　First of all, she was too much in charge. Every time she went to her mother-in-law's house, she would always ask her about all the details of her time with Huanhuan, where she played, where she ate. Afterwards, she would tell her that there are a lot of infectious diseases outside, so if she can go home, she should eat in restaurants as little as possible, and that eating at home is both hygienic and affordable.　Lele has a good figure and likes to wear halter dresses in summer. My mother-in-law didn't criticize her directly, but only said that nowadays the social security is not good, and a young girl who wears too revealing clothes is prone to attracting trouble. When it gets a little cooler, she will point to Lele's low-waisted pants and say that a girl's waist and navel are the most afraid of getting cold, and that sitting down will be a lifelong problem. Lele at first also as a whisper like how to wear how to wear, and then go to the mother-in-law's house, Huanhuan will remind, let her change a piece of solemn focus of the clothes.　Lele couldn't help but feel a little annoyed, thinking that her mother hadn't said anything yet, and that her mother-in-law was being too lenient.　What also makes Lele squirm is Huanhuan's mother-son relationship. Lele thinks that boys should make up their own minds about things, but Huanhuan has to listen to his mother-in-law before doing anything. In addition, Lele thought that Huanhuan had become an adult and should not be too close to his mother like a young boy. However, her mother-in-law didn't seem to be shy at all, patting Huanhuan's face and hugging his back in front of Lele. There was a mole on Huanhuan's brow, and her mother-in-law would point to it and say that she had one on her forehead too, which meant that mother and son were of one mind and could not be lost wherever they went.　Lele also knew that her mother-in-law didn't mean any harm when she said this, but she just didn't feel comfortable listening to her.　Lele wants to have a good relationship with her mother-in-law, and every time she goes to her mother-in-law's house, she takes the initiative to do a little bit of housework, such as washing the dishes and washing the dishes and so on. Once, when Lele got up to clean up after a meal, she caught a glimpse of her mother-in-law pulling Huanhuan, who was trying to help, and as a result, Lele cleaned up the dinner table that day alone. Although the incident was small, Lele was very sad and felt that her mother-in-law did not treat her as her own child.　Huanhuan has been handing over her salary to her mother since she started working, and has no concept of financial management. Lele thinks that since she is in love and will soon start a family, she has to plan more for the future, and relying on her mother-in-law for everything is not a long-term solution. So when the paycheck came again, Huanhuan asked her mother-in-law for her paycheck card. The mother-in-law frowned and asked three or two questions, and learned that it was Lele's idea, and even cried out, saying that the daughter-in-law has not yet been married to the door, the son began to count the mother.　A few days later, in front of Lele, the mother-in-law will payroll card to Huanhuan, and Huanhuan's previous income listed in the detailed accounts, three or four years down, payroll income of more than 100,000 yuan, the mother-in-law did not move a point, all in the card. After these clear account, the mother-in-law threw down a sentence: not to say that Huanhuan playing small expenses, is that these years of food and clothing, without a hundred thousand or eighty thousand can not come down. The two young people were in a dilemma, and afterwards Huanhuan blamed Lele for being nosy, saying that he was the only child of his parents, and that it would not be theirs in the future. The mother-in-law also therefore and Lele have a gap, and then there is something to say, each other have to go around the bend a little bit.　Soon talk about marriage. Mother-in-law had looked at the house, the total price of more than one million, mother-in-law calculated the account, in addition to years of savings plus Huanhuan salary card more than 100,000, there is still a lot of difference. The mother-in-law borrowed more than three hundred thousand from relatives and bought the house. When the real estate license was handed over to them, the mother-in-law said that although the real estate license is registered in the name of Huanhuan, but in the notary public notarized, is the pre-marital property, if there is a change in the future can not enter the distribution of property.　Lele is naturally very upset, think to get married, mother-in-law still have a hand on her.　After marriage, Lele encountered new troubles. Two pampered children from childhood used to eat ready-made meals, just started to live life is still a little fresh, after work, according to the recipe to do a few meals, but either salty or bland, not tasty and very troublesome. Huanhuan then suggested that she wanted to go home to eat. Although she didn't want to look at her mother-in-law's face, but buying food and cooking is really a heavy burden, so most of the time she had to follow Huanhuan to go home with her. In front of her mother-in-law, she had to listen to her teachings, and the topic of the house would come up from time to time, saying that not only did she spend all of her life savings to get married for them, but she still owed a lot of debts to her relatives. Of course, Lele can hear what her mother-in-law is saying, and inevitably, she gets tired of it and nags Huanhuan about it. Huanhuan is always on her mother-in-law's side, saying that her mother has worked very hard to bring her up since she was a child, and that gratitude is something she should be grateful for, so don't be so petty about what she says to her mother. Lele feels that Huanhuan only cares about her mother-in-law and is not considerate of her own feelings.　These trivialities have accumulated into a powder keg, and after each quarrel, Lele went back to her mother's home in anger, and Huanhuan simply stayed at her mother-in-law's place, making the small family an empty shell. Lele is very aggrieved, lying in bed at night, her mother-in-law's words, her mother-in-law's expression always appeared in front of her eyes, she felt that all the unpleasantness is caused by her mother-in-law.　The mother-in-law so far does not let go of Huanhuan, big and small things control them.　As long as there is this mother-in-law, it is impossible for two people to have real happiness.