My best friend, Tong, is the one with the best family background among us. She is also the only daughter. She is also the oldest among us to get married. My child is only over one year old, and her eldest daughter is already a child. He is in first grade and his younger son is also in kindergarten.
, so in my impression, Yan Bin is indeed a rare warm man. I can see how good he is to the child and the child's parents.
I remember when I was preparing for the defense of my graduation thesis in the second semester of my senior year, I spent the whole day running between the professor’s office and the library. I was so busy that I even forgot about my mother’s birthday. Fortunately, Yan Bin bought it online in advance. I bought a gift and sent it back to my mother, and sent a message on my mother’s birthday to remind the children, “Don’t forget that today is my mother’s birthday.”
Flash marriages and final marriages were popular in the years after we graduated from college. Xiaotong and her husband Yan Bin were typical married people. They started dating in their sophomore year and got married as soon as they graduated.
However, within two years of getting married, we frequently heard children complaining to us on the phone, saying that Yan Bin’s temper had suddenly become much worse than before, and his tone of voice when speaking to her also became harsh. If you don't say a word or two, you'll get embarrassed. Especially after giving birth to her eldest daughter, Yan Bin often lost his temper with her for no apparent reason during her confinement, which made her suffer a lot. She was no longer as gentle and considerate as she was when she was in love and when she first got married.
The child also complained to his mother-in-law, but the mother-in-law said that Yan Bin's personality has become much better since he met the child. She also said that he has always yelled at his parents since he was a child, and he has never spoken to his parents. Speak softly like you would a child when you were first married.
After listening to Xiaotong’s description of what her mother-in-law said, I roughly understood that Yan Bin was not a gentle and considerate man from the beginning, but that after he fell in love with Xiaotong, he knew what Xiaotong liked. The boy is a boy, so he does what he likes and makes himself look like the boy likes, so that he can successfully chase the boy.
What you can’t get is always in turmoil, and those who are favored are confident. When a man wants to get a woman, he will carefully please her, always consider the woman, and intentionally or unintentionally act like a woman likes her. , hoping to gain a woman’s love for him through constant efforts and changes.
When a man pursues a woman and their relationship stabilizes, the man "changes". He does not become bad, but he changes back to his original self. The kindness I used to treat women was just a disguised means to achieve a goal.
So, those women who have been shouting all day long, "Why are my husbands not as good after marriage as they were before marriage?" Open your eyes and see clearly. The truth is: Most of your husbands before marriage are playing the role of you. Like the look!
Not all men just pretend to be what their wives like before getting married. Uncle Li and Aunt Guo, who live downstairs in my house, are the most enviable couple in our buildings. I have never had a quarrel, and no one may believe me if I tell you.
One time Aunt Guo was ill and was hanging bottles in her father’s clinic. When her mother chatted with her, she learned that Uncle Li had just returned from the army when he was young and was assigned to work in a bank. Uncle Li, who was born in the same family, was always serious and serious in speech, giving people a majestic and domineering look, and he was aloof from thousands of miles away. People who didn't know it thought he was putting on official airs.
But after being introduced to Aunt Guo, she seemed to have suddenly changed, from a mighty and domineering warrior to a gentle scholar, and her speaking voice was not as loud and sonorous as in the army. , I find someone to play chess and practice calligraphy when I have nothing to do. My whole temperament has changed.
This is all because of what Aunt Guo said to the introducer. Aunt Guo said: I would rather find a gentle, polite and knowledgeable person. The introducer used Aunt Guo’s original words. I brought it to Uncle Li. From then on, Uncle Li slowly took off the serious look he had developed in the army, just like taking off his military uniform.
Uncle Li did not eat bitter melon at first, saying that he had suffered a lot during his years in the army and did not want to suffer any more.
But Aunt Guo likes to eat bitter melon. After getting married, Uncle Li slowly started to eat some bitter melon, and later he also liked the dish of bitter melon. This is probably what the so-called Aiwujiwu means!
Uncle Li works in a bank and Aunt Guo works in a post and telecommunications office. Since their children went to boarding at a key middle school in Shangli, they go out together every morning to go for a walk by the river or lake to exercise, and then go buy breakfast together. After shopping for groceries and going home, the two of them went out together and went to work separately.
After dinner, Aunt Guo went to dance in the square. Uncle Li was playing a few games of chess with his old rivals in a corner of the square. After Aunt Guo finished dancing, she went to the old place to find Uncle Li. . If Uncle Li is watching, he will stop watching and go home with Aunt Guo. If Li Shuruo is still playing chess, Aunt Guo will wait for Uncle Li to finish the game before leaving together.
Whether a man truly loves a woman cannot just depend on how good he was to that woman before marriage, but whether he treats her better than before marriage in the long-term relationship after marriage.
Because of true love, I know how to cherish, tolerate and accommodate myself better after marriage, slowly put away what the other party doesn’t like, slowly get used to doing things that make the other party happy, and then slowly change. Become what the other person likes.
In real life, there are many stories like those of children. When falling in love, men are considerate and tolerant. In the end, the woman is moved and passes the test and achieves success. However, after marriage, the man slowly... No longer considerate and giving, no longer accommodating and tolerant.
Once there is a quarrel, the woman will say sadly: "You have changed. You were so good before, but now you have changed!" It is said that women are emotional animals, and this sentence is absolutely true. , when a woman truly falls in love with a man, she will treat him wholeheartedly, sacrifice everything for him, and become what he likes.
But, dear, love is actually mutual. The reason why a woman after a quarrel says that the man has changed is because the woman is constantly giving love to the man and slowly becomes him. Although he likes her, after getting married, men get used to receiving love from women and are not willing to give it anymore.
A person who truly loves you will devote himself to you without asking for anything in return. He will treat you well and pursue you because he only wants to spend the rest of his life with you, not for satisfaction. Their hunting mentality proves how powerful they are.
A person who truly loves you will understand your kindness, cherish your efforts, and will give you a sufficient sense of security without giving you any chance to guess his thoughts.
A person who truly loves you will care about what you like and what you don’t like. He will love the same thing you like and slowly fall in love with it. You don’t like people who talk too loudly. , he will lower the volume appropriately to avoid disturbing you.
A person who truly loves you will slowly become what you like.
-END-
About the author: Zhang Chen Jing is a woman who likes telling stories and writing!