May you and I: although each different way, but can not regret the dream of returning to the place, only hate too hasty. The first thing you need to do is to get your hands dirty.
Looking back at half a life, like a dream. We have been in the heart of love, waiting for, but also paid for the person, has long been in a "may" in the miss, submerged in the depths of the years, only to leave infinite regrets.
Once agreed to a lifetime, but ultimately only half a lifetime of love. The first half of this half-life love affair, in fact, is a lifetime, and later recall, the sense of pain is enough to offset the poison that penetrates the intestines.
Eileen Chang wrote in Half a Life: "The days go by so fast, for people after middle age, ten or eight years seems to be a matter of time, but for young people, three or five years can be a lifetime."
Shijun held Manzhen tightly, and Manzhen said painfully, "Shijun, we can't go back, we can't go back anymore!
Shijun said, "We can't go back, we can't go back."
The world is full of love, and who can go back to the lost youth, or make up for it? "Can't go back", is to miss a person's pain. "Can't go back", but also miss a great regret of the people who love you y.
When I watched the movie "Half-Life", I only felt that this time there is also a deep love and shallow destiny, the creation of people. Feeling sad and painful, is the regret of love but not allowed, is the human nature of greed, selfishness, is the pity for Manzhen, Manlu, Zhu Hongcai grief.
A closer look at the original, but found that everyone has everyone's helplessness: Man Lu and Yu Zhuan, from the youthful ignorance to the devastation, but also regret, desolate, and meet again even if there is still unwilling to give up in the eyes of the eyes, but can not go back, and can not embrace each other; Cuizhi and Shuhui, from the initial sympathy to the ultimate distance, but also a thousand sails, things are not the same; Mrs. Gu, although not lack of love for her daughter, but will give her a daughter, but also the daughter's love for her, but the daughter's love for the daughter, but also a woman. The story of Mrs. Gu, who loves her daughter but puts a sum of money given by Man Lu in her pocket, shows the weakness of human nature to the fullest extent; and Manzhen and Shijun, who are in love with each other from the beginning to the end of their lives, and when the time has changed, the half-life love affair is left with a lifetime of regrets.
The phrase "we can't go back, we can't go back anymore" in Half a Life is enough to describe the relationship between Manjing and Shijun. Are you okay?"
Understand the talent know, in fact, is not good, just has passed, has long been hopeless.
? 01
For Manlu: How much of the turn, but also others have not seen the depth of love.
Manlu and Yujin have grown up together since they were young, and are in love with each other. The two of them have been together since childhood, and they are very much in love with each other. They know each other well, and when they are old enough to get married, they should have gotten engaged and married, and then lived a happy life.
Manlu is full of hope for the future, and if there are no accidents, she will be able to reap the benefits of her own love and marriage. But the classic of the novel is that Eileen arranges an "accident" in the story, and makes it a "trigger" for the fate of others.
After her father's death, the backbone of the family falls, her mother and grandmother are at a loss, and her sister and brothers are still young. Manlu, as the eldest daughter of the family, decided that she had to go out and earn money, after all, the family had to live on.
But when you put Manlu's story in the context of the same era in reality, it's really hard for a person, especially a woman, to really go out and support a family. So, she had no choice but to end up earning money with the only advantage she had, her beauty. She ended up going to work as a dancer, and from then on, she used the money she earned as a dancer to support her younger siblings in their studies, as well as to help out her mother and grandmother at home, in order to lighten their burden.
The moment she decided to become a dancer, she gave up her dignity, even her love, and the future she longed for. She herself knows that the profession of a dancer is despised in that society, as well as the people who engage in such a profession.
So, she found Yujin, and withdrew from the marriage, without saying anything, turned around and left. She left with tears in her eyes, and it was a deep affection that no one else knew.
Years later, he did not marry, she did not marry. And her heart but also feel extremely humble, she felt that she is no longer worthy of him. Until later, met Zhu Hongcai, Manlu y know that he can be said to this man is no love feeling can be said, just feel that they need to get married. For the rest of her life, she needs to rely on this man to live.
His love for Yujin, however, has never been put down, so when she knew that Yujin was temporarily living in her own home, she ran to see it, and when she saw it, she was also once speechless, speechless, just to help Yujin to pick up the change that fell on the ground with a kind of panic, just to know that her own sister, Manzhen, sends a book to the man in front of her, her heart is less than jealous.
And Yujin, in the end, also introduced by a friend, married another woman, and the wedding was held in a borrowed club. How ironic, as Eileen Chang wrote in her book: "There are many marriages where people who love each other cannot be united, and those who can are not necessarily the ones they want."
For the sake of this family, Manlu has lost her love, her dignity, her self, and even her health. She has never lived for herself, and many times she has shouted, "If I didn't have to support this family, who would want to be a dancer who is disliked? You think it's easy for me?" .
Later, Manlu became more and more hideous, more and more twisted inside, until finally designed to let their own husbands raped their own sister, and persuade their own mother to accept the reality.
In this short life, she has experienced too much and lost too much. Without the death of her father, her life could have been a happy and successful one. But in the face of reality, she missed it all.
02
For Cuizhi and Shuhui: How many people have been defeated by the word "wait"?
Cuizhi and Shijun eventually got married under the arrangement of their families. The first time I saw this was when I was a student at the University of California, Berkeley, and the second time I was a student at the University of California, Berkeley. However, only they themselves know how helpless it is not to be able to be with the one they love the most, but to succumb to others, or to believe in destiny.
Even to the wedding night, Cuizhi had cried and asked Shijun, she said: "How to do, I do not like you, you also do not like me, we are not already too late ......"
Yes, at this moment already! too late. And once, they were in time. At that time, Cuizhi, generous and cheerful, proud and unrestrained.
This is the first time I've ever seen a woman in the world who has been in a position of power, and I've never seen one.
Coincidentally, Cuizhi is also in love with Shuhui, and feels that he is a charming man, and for him to converge on his own shenanigans and willfulness. The first time they rowed together, Shuhui accidentally splashed water on Cuizhi. Cuizhi is not angry at all, but just wipes it gently. Shuhui couldn't help but sigh, "At least she is not at all missy in front of me."
People where there will be no temper, just because of love, so willing to become gentle in front of the people they love.
Cuizhi is active, she knows that she and Shuhui both like each other. However, Shuhui has built up a line of defense in his heart, which is about the difference in status, and originates from the secular family. He felt in his heart that "he is such a poor boy, her family is certainly absolutely not agreed, he also do not want to climb, because he is also a proud person."
So, he chose to wait and wait again, want to wait for a successful career, and wait for him enough to be worthy of Cuizhi ......
How many destinies, just in the waiting, a little bit of the end of the road, missed. Years later, Shuhui and Cuizhi met again, looking back, disappointed. The wife he married was but a shadow of her. And every time Cuizhi hears his name, her heart still inexplicably throbs with joy.
Those years that once put everything into each other for each other, also became everything can not come back. Some people say, this long life, we will eventually lose. So might as well be bold and brave. In the ability to love each other when, to love, don't leave regrets.
Although Eileen Chang wrote this sentence in Half a Life, she said: "No matter how bad your condition is, there will always be someone who loves you. No matter how good your condition is, there is always someone who doesn't love you."
But few people will understand: when a man meets his beloved woman, want to spend the rest of his life with her ****, but do not have the strength to immediately give her a better future when the kind of contradiction and inferiority complex, in fact, the heart is more difficult.
How about being in love with you? The first thing you need to do is to get your hands on a new one, and you'll be able to do that. If you can't give you a lifetime of peace and quiet, then how have you ever been happy?
I want to wait a little bit, wait for myself to become better, and so can give each other more real future. The first thing you need to do is to get your hands on a new one, and you'll be able to do that. If you don't have a true heart, no need to think about the future, only temporary, that may not be happy. But someone's true love, defeated in the wait, which can not regret?
Love should not be blind, and did not consider the future, just others do not understand want to wait for their own worthy of each other's kind of deep love, as the author of the book, "If love is blind, it seems that the people next to it is even more blind."
Since we can not wait, then I wish you well.
? 03?
For Shijun and Manzhen: How much love is there that stops at the depth of love?
Shijun and Manjing were once the ones who loved each other to the core.
Manjing once wrote in a letter to Shijun: "I want you to know that there is always someone waiting for you in this world, no matter when, no matter where, you know, there is always such a person.
Even after many years of separation, this letter has always been treasured by Shijun in his books.
Even after years of separation, this letter has been kept by Shijun in his books. After all, it is this letter full of love that accompanied him through the night, and gave him something to hold on to for his feelings for Manzhen.
If they had gotten engaged and married earlier, if Shijun hadn't thought twice when he saw Manzhen chatting with another man, if they hadn't quarreled, if Shijun hadn't trusted his sister's words,......
then would their ending have been different? However, there is no if.
Even when he invited Manjing to be his guest, even though everyone else could see the relationship between him and Manjing, he still said that Manjing was his colleague. When his parents thought that Manjing and a dancer (Manlu) looked alike, even though Shijun hid the fact that Manjing's sister was a dancer from his parents, he had hesitated.
Before Manjing and the family, Shijun chose the latter. The latter is the most important thing for Shijun, as his father's illness and his mother's dispute with his aunt make him want to quit his job in Shanghai and go back to Nanjing to take responsibility for the family. It's not that he doesn't love Manzhen, it's just that he doesn't have the ability to do so.
The love that Manzhen wants is pure and independent, she is not greedy for money, and she has suffered for the sake of each other's future, and she doesn't like Shen Shijun to go home and rely on his parents. The company's main goal is to make sure that the company is able to meet the needs of its customers, and that the company is able to meet the needs of its customers in the future.
But Shijun, in his heart of hearts, thinks that as long as he inherits his father's family business, he will be able to do everything, even helping his mother-in-law's family after marriage, which is nothing. But if he doesn't seize this opportunity, then his mother, sister-in-law and nephew will have to rely on him to support them, and there will be no need for him and Manjing to get married.
But for Manjing, her sister is innocent, even if she doesn't want her to continue to be a dancer, she still respects and understands her sister, so her mother won't use her money anymore. Therefore, she could not tolerate her favorite man, looking down on her sister.
After the fight, Manjing took off her engagement ring and Shijun left in anger. After this separation, Manjing began a life of torture.
Her sister Manlu, who is infertile, and her husband Zhu Hongcai, tried to stabilize her marriage by setting up a scheme for Manzheng to be raped by her brother-in-law and become pregnant. When Shijun comes to find Manframe, Manlu lies to him that Manframe is already married. Desperate, Shijun chooses to return to Nanjing and gets married under the arrangement of his family.
Manzhen was locked up by her sister and brother-in-law. She cried, shouted, made a scene, struggled, begged her sister, and committed suicide. In the end, the only belief that sustained her to live was also to be able to meet Shijun again. But under her mother's persuasion and her sister's imprisonment and coercion, Manjing still chose to compromise, or perhaps to hold on to her innocence and kindness. So she gave birth to the child. So naive that she thought that if she gave birth to the child, she could really leave, escape the clutches of her sister and brother-in-law, and then meet Shijun.
When Manzhen gave birth and escaped, everything changed. In the pouring rain, she cried and asked, "Shijun, why did you bear me?" But she didn't know that Shen Shijun had looked for her and waited for her even after he couldn't reach her.
When Shijun and Manzhen met again, he looked at her. He looked at her and didn't know where to start even though he had a thousand words in his heart. She looked at him with tears in her eyes.
The two went into a private room in the hotel and embraced each other after talking about their experiences. Manzheng asked Shijun, "Are you happy?"
Shijun wishes he could start over with Manjing. But Manzhen can only cry, "We can't go back, we can't go back, we can't go back, don't you understand?"
Manzhen finally admits defeat and is forced to marry her brother-in-law Zhu Hongcai.
Many people who love each other can never go back after they are separated. Even if there is still that love, there is no longer a suitable identity and reason, or even an excuse. The people who love each other but are separated, are in their own lives, experiencing the sadness and happiness of that one. In the distant but still clear memories, repeating the love and tenderness of the year.
The love thing, if ever try their best, but still can not be together, perhaps it is really deep love shallow, no fate.
The edge of this half-life, but a lifetime of love.
04
About Mrs. Gu: Understanding her helplessness, she realized that "a family has to be like a family".
After reading Half a Life, I once felt particularly annoyed by Mrs. Gu's role, thinking that she was weak and stupid, and that her daughter, Gu Manzhen, was designed by her sister to be raped by her brother-in-law, who imprisoned her. Mrs. Gu, as a mother, was actually quick to admit it and planned to persuade Manzhen immediately.
After Manzhen was raped by her brother-in-law, she made a fuss about reporting the rape to the police, but Mrs. Gu knew that and said, "Aiya, this child is so ignorant, how can you yell out this kind of thing? The first thing you need to do is to get your hands on a new one, and you'll be able to do that.
Even when she left Manlu's house, she didn't want to see her daughter, Manzhen, but instead, she carried a sum of money in her pocket that Manlu gave her.
But when she revisits the story, she realizes how difficult and helpless her life situation was. Her husband is dead, she has to raise six children and her mother-in-law on her own, and in the context of the novel, living in a place like Shanghai is simply stormy.
One of the earlier details is that when Manjing has also been working, she tells her mother to stop taking the money earned by her sister as a dancer. And was very angry with her mother when she found out.
And how did Mrs. Gu react? She was coy and didn't dare to argue. As Eileen Chang said, people start to be afraid of their own children when they get older.
The word "fear" is really alarming.
In the era and environment, maybe she only chose to compromise with her daughter's rape by her own son-in-law, which is like the saying in the book: "A family has to be like a family".
? 05
In Half a Life, it seems that it is not just about the love between Manzhen and Shijun, but also the friendship between Manzhen, Shijun and Shuhui, and the affection between Manzhen and her mother and sister, which will never come back.
It's just that what Eileen focuses on is that the love between Manzhen and Shijun has been missed and can never be returned.
Since they are destined to miss out on this half-life love affair, if they still remember it in their next life, they will **** repair their love for each other, and keep their fate together.
Note: This article was first published in the WeChat public "pool waves"