I say "if" because it's actually a little strange. In other words, according to common sense, we should not be friends.
But you have to believe that this is really a true story. If it's true.
Cao Cao is a flea, a little gray flea. Looks no different from other fleas. Of course, it is actually a special kind of flea. It can talk and speak human words. This is what I think is the most unusual thing about it, and I think many people think so-after all, few people have seen talking fleas. But it doesn't think so. It is said that its advantages are much better than this, and its superiority is by no means summarized by this skill of carving insects. I said you really brag.
"In fact, for a flea. Human language is easy to learn, and any flea can learn to speak if he wants to. " It doesn't look like a lie.
"Then why don't they learn to talk?"
"Because they feel unnecessary, they will never waste their time on unnecessary things."
"What?" I can't believe it. "They regard communication with human beings as unnecessary? So what have they been doing all their lives? "
"Eat, rest, have children, and then die."
"That's it?"
"That's all."
"I still don't understand-what's the point of all this?"
"What's the point? Then let me ask you, what is the meaning of your life? Is it meaningless, so it won't live? In fact, living is the greatest meaning. "
"。 . . . . 。" I was silent, because I found that in fact, human beings can't find any meaning for life.
"You say, if I don't show up, do you want to learn the language of a flea, or do you want to communicate with a flea?"
"I never thought of it." I answered truthfully.
"That's right! You humans don't think it's necessary, and so do we? Everyone has their own different lives and things to do. What can be exchanged and communicated? "
I have nothing to say by default. What else can I say? Facing the truth of a flea, I have to shut up.
More importantly, I noticed that the sound was transferred from me to the coffee cup in front of me.
I should have thought that anyone who soaks in a warm hot bath, drinks strong coffee and plays chess will become smarter.
"Nestle's, it tastes good." Cao Cao's voice is lazy and comfortable.
What can I do except smile?
Actually, it's not just that I haven't thought about it. Before Cao Cao, I had never even seen a flea.
This is nothing strange. For a person living in a city, fleas are a strange thing. This ancient bug is hard to find in the countryside now, let alone in the city. Their number seems to be inversely proportional to the degree of human civilization and the sanitation of the environment-it is not surprising that fleas have never been seen in cities where clean chickens can't fly, rabbits can't jump and urine can't come out, but it is strange that fleas exist.
So I know very little about fleas. What I know is limited to one thing: fleas are insects; Second, fleas can jump; Third, fleas bite people, and people bitten by fleas itch. As for what this jumping and biting bug looks like, I have never seen it. In other words, Cao Cao is the first flea I have ever known and seen.
I sometimes think that this may be a kind of fate. Imagine if I knew it was a flea when Cao Cao appeared, that is, a kind of insect called "pest", which would bite everyone and be punished. I will not hesitate to shoot it. It didn't even have a chance to speak, so it died without rhyme or reason. How did so many stories happen later?
I met Cao Cao on a midsummer night. At that time, I was sitting at my desk, struggling with a lot of homework, and the stars behind the aluminum alloy glass window were faintly flashing. The desk lamp shines brightly on the exercise book, but the moon is silent in the shade. I translated Su Dongpo's When is the Bright Moon? Without emotion, he copied the stiff and rigid explanation in the textbook alive and dismembered a beautiful article beyond recognition.
Of course, I haven't complained about it for a long time. If a strange thing is everywhere, no one will feel strange. Because everyone is used to it or numb.
This kind of work is boring and not creative day after day. But that day was a little different. I found a mistake in my exercise book. Small, gray. If it were now, of course I knew it was a flea. But I hadn't seen a flea at that time, so it was just an ordinary bug with no name to me.
At that time, it crawled slowly on the phrase "the moon is full and sunny". My first reaction was to get rid of it-note that it is not killing. I have never been in the habit of killing bugs. I think I am kind, but I am just afraid. It's embarrassing to say this, but I do think these bugs look ferocious and scary when they look carefully. It's better to make less trouble.
So I took a deep breath and blew on it. This is my general way to deal with bugs. I can drive those little things away without touching them, and they won't be hurt. This is killing two birds with one stone. Unfortunately, later facts proved how wrong my idea was.
This breath is like a flea in exchange for a storm, and Cao naturally can't "stand still." After making sure that it had been blown away by me, I began to continue my meaningless boring homework. This is really too small and insignificant.
Twenty minutes later, I finally finished this boring job, and I was sleepy for a long time. Coffee can't stimulate my nerves anymore. I rubbed my dry and sore eyes, ready to close my exercise book, so I rushed to bed to see my lovely Duke Zhou.
It is said that rubbing your eyes can make people see more clearly. I think this is the absolute truth. Under this rub, I found that flea actually appeared in my exercise book just now, small and gray, and strolled slowly on the sentence "full moon, sunny and round" (later I asked it if it liked the poem, but it said no).
I was wondering at that time whether it understood what it was doing and for what purpose it had to climb into my notebook. This is really a tenacious flea who is not afraid of death, and his spirit is commendable. I also think it's a good thing that I didn't close my notebook just now, otherwise there will only be a flea specimen or a flea martyr left in my exercise book tomorrow morning, and I will become a butcher who slaughtered a hero flea.
I'm glad I didn't accidentally crush this hero flea. I have always cherished heroes and attached importance to them. But what should I do with this flea hero now? Although he may really be a hero, he is just a flea after all. I can't talk to it all night, let alone marry it in Jin Lan. What's more, I couldn't wait to see Duke Zhou at that time, and I was not interested in any flea hero at all. I sighed and took a deep breath, preparing for the same trick.
Unexpectedly, it actually spoke at this time.
As we all know, the first sentence that a special person says is special. For example, the opening line of The Little Prince in the Forest is: "Would you please draw me a sheep?"
I have always liked this movie called I like the little prince, a lovely child who loves a rose deeply. I stubbornly believe in his existence. I dream that one day the little prince will come to earth from the asteroid B6 12 where he lives, and I happened to meet him. I even worked tirelessly for this dream for a long time and studied hard to draw a sheep. I think if one day the little prince really appears, he wants me to draw a sheep for him.
Unfortunately, my great efforts soon failed. No matter how I change, my sheep always looks like a dog. Actually, you can't blame me. For a time, I fell madly in love with that little dog named Snoopy. I drew it over and over again in class, and the more I watched it, the more I couldn't put it down. Standing, sitting, lying down, crying and laughing, asleep and awake, lazy and energetic. Over time, my ability to draw Snoopy has been perfect, and my brushwork is pure. Of course, there is still a little sequela, that is, any animal I draw in the future will look like Snoopy.
So I gave up the plan to draw a sheep for the little prince. I think, if the little prince asks me to draw him a sheep one day, I will draw him a Snoopy. Then explain to him that dogs are much better than sheep. Especially this snoopy, cute and humorous. The most important thing is that it will never eat your roses. ...
Far from the point, in fact, what I want to say is that I have a strong ability to accept miracles (specifically, things that should not appear or should not be said, such as the little prince, such as fleas). It is not only a strong ability to accept, but also a hope. I am looking forward to the day when something (preferably the little prince) suddenly says to me, "Would you please draw me a sheep?" At that time, I will not be surprised and say to it without hesitation: "I will draw you a dog!" " "
Now, a flea comes instead of a little prince. It spoke when I was about to blow it away.
"What the hell are you doing? You know this will kill people! "
It actually called me names? !
I have a bad cough. Just now, I was shocked and sucked back the air I was about to blow out. Now I'm choking on saliva.
More importantly, I can't figure it out. Will it scold me?
Of course I know it's a flea, not a little prince, and naturally I won't draw him a sheep, but I don't think it's too outrageous. At most, it will let me draw it a mosquito, a bug or something. Then I can still say to it, "Let me draw you a dog." Then explain to it that dogs (especially Snoopy) are much better than mosquitoes, bugs or anything else. ...
But ... but ... it ... it actually called me names! I ... when we first met, I was scolded by a flea! (Poor me for preparing lines for a long time)
I don't know what to say, although I have been looking forward to meeting a miracle for a long time, and I am fully prepared for it. I firmly believe that if the opening sign of the miracle I met is classic, my answer will be more classic.
But I didn't expect it to curse! I always thought that when a miracle appeared, it would say to me, "Would you please draw me something?" Then I said to it, "Let me draw you a dog!" " "This answer is really classic, but it's a pity that it's not necessary now.
"Please ... are you talking to me?" According to my temper, I should immediately scold this flea to avenge myself, but the problem is that it is a flea and a miracle! Surprise made me repeat the most instinctive stupid questions of human beings, and I found that my tolerance for miracles was not as good as I thought.
"Is there anything else here besides us?"
"You, what are you?" If the little prince appeared, I wouldn't ask such a stupid question. The problem is that it is a flea. As I said, I happened to have never seen a flea.
"Idiot, you haven't even seen fleas?"
"I haven't seen it." Answer confidently.
..... speechless, I guess the subtext was defeated by me.
"And ... since you are a flea, what kind of' life' have you had?" I admire myself for being able to talk to fleas in a crisis.
"You are so stupid! Haven't you ever heard of a rhetorical method called personification? "
……
This is the whole process of knowing Cao Cao; Of course, you can't imagine how wonderful it is not to discuss anthropomorphic rhetoric with a flea.
Afterwards, I told him a story about a little prince, and I asked him with some regret why he didn't ask me to draw something as the opening remarks. After all, that's my dream for a long time.
"Please," it gave me a white look, "I am a flea, not a little prince, you are just a student, not a pilot! If every miracle is the same, wouldn't it be the beginning of Taiyuan? What's more, how can someone like me ... (Anyone who has seen Hanamichi Sakuragi's words and deeds in Slam Dunk can do it here, so I omit it. )
So I figured out that there are no two identical leaves in the world, and everyone's fate is unique. Why envy others? If I meet the little prince, it's just a play I've read the script. Very boring. God gave the little prince of Huberley, St. Dex, and a flea that could curse me. But isn't this a lovely miracle? Although Cao Cao is not as romantic as the little prince, it is also very interesting. This is a real miracle in my real life, which deserves my treasure and gratitude.
So, old man, thank you!
On the third night of knowing Cao Cao, I finally thought of asking its name-before that, I used to call it a flea, and it called me a man. Just like my kind usually takes its kind as a general term. But I think the name is dry, cold and impersonal. So I want to ask its name.
"What about you ... do you have a name?"
"yes."
"What?"
"Cao Cao (in fact, according to its pronunciation at that time, it should be Cao Cao, but in order to avoid confusion or others say it deceives the world, I later persuaded it to change to these two words. Trees attract wind, and being too famous is not good for anyone, and fleas are no exception. "
"Cao Cao?" I want to know.
"What's the matter? Are you asking me why I have the same name as a great politician and strategist in your history books? "
"Why?"
"It's very simple, because I was born by Cao Caosheng."
"What, how is that possible?"
"What, you don't believe it?"
So Cao Cao began to talk about what he saw at that time. Tell the story that happened to Cao Cao vividly. Although most of them are recorded in the romance of the Three Kingdoms, I still listened with relish. I have to admit that Cao Cao's eloquence is really good, especially in telling stories.
"I'm just a little think impassability, flea life is not very short? How did you live to this day? "
"It's a long story. You know, generally speaking, we fleas always mate and reproduce at the right time, and then die. "
"So-"
"I am no exception, but the female flea who was supposed to mate with me suddenly died."
"Dead?"
"Yes, when Cao Cao tickled, he accidentally pinched it to death." Speaking of which, Cao Cao's expression is a little dim.
"So-"
"So I'm sad."
"So-"
"So I was disheartened and decided to give up mate selection and childbirth."
"So-"
"Then I'll be muddled up to now."
I was silent and decided to believe the story.
Therefore, I have always been somewhat awed by it. A flea in the Three Kingdoms period is incredible! And it's a flea on Cao Cao. Extraordinary fame. Small people like me can only look up.
Later I got acquainted with Cao Cao. It always lives in my hair and talks to me when no one is around. Of course, it promises not to bite me-you know, fleas bite and need to live on it. This is normal. Fleas want to suck blood just like people want to eat. They can't live without eating. What's more, a flea bites a person and itches for no more than one bag in two days. People eat everything and kill if they want to. After eating, they will spit out a few bones (if they are a little hungry, they won't even spit them out). In this comparison, fleas are not much kinder than humans. Humans still classify fleas as "pests", gnashing their teeth and eager to get rid of them. In fact, the so-called "pests" and "beneficial insects" are just harmful or beneficial to human beings. The so-called "those who follow me prosper and those who oppose me die". Humans feel good about themselves here. This is harmful and that is beneficial, but they forget that they have destroyed a beautiful essence beyond recognition. It seems that human beings are the biggest pests.
I want to go further. Actually, what I want to say is that fleas bite because they want to be forgiven. Not terrible or hateful. So I made friends with a flea and let it live in my hair. But I don't like being bitten by fleas either, so it promises not to bite me.
It didn't bite me, but my classmate was a little miserable. During that time, some students often scratched their fingers back and forth in a certain part of the body like eagle claws, as if practicing a strange martial art. After a while, there will be a strange red protrusion on that part. Everyone is so spectacular.
Sometimes I can't help laughing. Imagine their reaction if they knew that the culprit was in my hair. What would my neat mother think if she knew that her daughter had fleas in her hair?
"You should feel lucky to enjoy the flea market with Cao Cao. Not everyone has such good luck! " Cao Cao said.
Cao Cao also formed the bad habit of taking a bath in my coffee. My lovely Snoopy coffee cup has become its natural swimming pool. It says that hot coffee can make people feel happy and refreshed, but I can only watch my cup of Nestle coffee turn into its bath water and wish to cut it into seventeen or eighteen pieces with a pencil sharpener.
At that time, we were still debating whether to be a good person or a flea. I say people are smart, and it says fleas are free. I said people can stomp on fleas at once. It is said that fleas can bite people, but they can't. I said fleas don't live long. It said, look, I have lived a long life. I didn't say anything. Two minutes later, I said, well, I'll try to be a flea in my next life. It says it will be human in the next life.
The days passed so long, but two months later, something happened that I couldn't believe-Cao Cao got married.
Yes, Cao Cao is married. It stood on my geometry exercise book that day and told me the news word by word. There is also a small gray flea, which looks like it. It is said that that is its bride.
At that time, my expression was like yawning when I looked up. An egg with a shell fell into my mouth, and I was dumbfounded.
"surprise! Now we are going on our honeymoon, and we have come to say goodbye to you. " Cao Cao skillfully jumped into my coffee cup and wandered freely.
"So ... will you come back?" I haven't come to my senses yet, MuMuDe.
"Of course! I can take my little flea to see you soon. " Cao Cao was filled with joy.
"Er ... happy wedding ... be careful all the way ... have a baby early ..." I don't know what to say.
"By the way, I have another secret to tell you before I leave." Cao cao suddenly positive color way.
"What?" I bent down.
"In fact, I was born under the name Cao Cao in the Romance of the Three Kingdoms."
Cao Cao finished and ran away with the bride. He couldn't help laughing as he ran. There really is nothing funnier than this.
I can't laugh or cry. I really want to buy a piece of tofu and kill myself at once. I was not only scolded by a flea, but also fooled by it like a fool!
For days, I have been planning how to teach Cao Cao a lesson. I must let it taste my taste. As soon as it comes back.
That day in English class, I suddenly thought of such a thing. What Cao Cao said-
"... mate and reproduce ... and then die ..."
I may never get revenge.
…………
long time ...
I smiled.
"For the sake of your boy's great love, I will spare you!"
Outside the window, the clouds are light and the wind is clear.