If you want to be happy, read more jokes. What kind of classic jokes do we come into contact with in our daily life? Next are the super funny humorous jokes that I have carefully prepared for you. Welcome to watch. !
Super funny and humorous jokes ***Popular articles***
1. I was just blocked in the alley by a few young people from society. It must be said that my walking posture is too arrogant. I Tell them: "Oh, you have never seen my running posture before, even worse!" "Come on, let's run and have a look!" Oh my god, I ran away in a flash without looking back! < /p>
2. Today there were two gangsters in the store who wanted to cause trouble for me. Without saying a word, I took the steel pipe and knocked it on the head of the gangster. Unexpectedly, it actually stuck to it. In the first battle, I lost to Hairspray.
3. My little nephew is in the third grade of elementary school. He likes a girl in the same class, and the girl doesn't bother him, so he establishes a "love relationship." Having a girlfriend is boring *** original words *** and I don’t know what to do. They are no different from ordinary classmates, but they are bound by their boyfriend status and cannot have contact with other girls. They feel at a loss. I don't dare to break up. The woman is a representative of the labor class, and she is afraid that she will not be able to be friends after the breakup, which will cause many disadvantages. My little nephew, a love that is riding a tiger...
4. I seemed to see Santa Claus last night. I was sitting in front of the store drinking mineral water. He had a big white beard and was dressed in a suit. He was wearing a red coat, holding an oversized bag in his hand, and asked me with a smile: "Can you give me the bottle after you finish drinking?"
5. "Jiang Chengzi·Apple" Mr. Newton was crazy about it, deduce laws and have strong knowledge. Snow White, the heart of food is miserable. Even though Eve didn't know it, she stole the forbidden fruit and harmed Adam. Send your lover off on Christmas Eve to keep you safe and get fucked. It is expected that in Tiantian Square, Little Apple is the king of music!
6. Anthropologists have found that if you step on a human's foot, he will most likely open his mouth, and the mouth is long. How big depends on how hard you step. It is further concluded that humans may have evolved from trash cans.
7. Once upon a time, there was a boy who had a crush on a girl in his class. When applying for the college entrance examination, the boy asked the girl where to apply. The girl answered: Jinan University. After hearing this, the boy decided to quietly apply for the same university as her, wanting to give her a surprise, so two months later, the boy boarded the train to Shandong.
8. "Do you know why the ugly ones have the priority to speak?" "Why?" Because people often say: 'I speak first about being ugly. '"
9. Our school held a winter sports meeting. It was extremely cold. A man ran three kilometers with a high fever and wore very little. His gay friend held his clothes and followed him in the end. He ran the outer circle until he finished the whole race, and finally put some clothes on him at the finish line, grabbed the hot water from the schoolgirl's hand and handed it to him, and finally helped him to the man's girlfriend who was waiting at the finish line. , walked away silently.
10. In the morning, a classmate sewed his crotch in the dormitory. Normally, he would take it off and sew it on his body. In the afternoon, everyone went to the bathhouse together. As soon as I took off my pants, the *** was gone... just sewn into the crotch...
11. I used to like a girl, and she said she liked boys who knew League of Legends, so I worked hard to practice Heroes. Alliance, after a month, I completely forgot about her
12. I heard a strange thing from my sisters: a colleague in the company is an anime nerd, and he suddenly became extremely irritable for a while. People were noisy, and all her friends stayed away from her. Only her best friend insisted, "I'm definitely sick! Let's go to the hospital and I'll pay for it!" and took her to have a brain CT scan, and it turned out that she had a tumor. How did you figure it out? My best friend replied, "She actually said she doesn't love Yin Sang anymore! She's obviously out of her mind!"... The man found out early and had no side effects, and now he's as cute as usual
13. Go The traffic police team was making a call, and I saw a cool guy standing in front of the window with a stack of driver's licenses, ready to deduct points, and said to the customer service girl: "Show me the next one." *How many violations and how many points need to be deducted?" After checking, the customer service girl told him that the guy was confused at that time. How many driver's licenses are needed! At this time, the customer service girl said something that almost made me laugh. Die. My sister said: "Brother, your score is enough to pass the Tsinghua University."
14. I always hear some women discussing the true meaning of cosmetics, clothes and pants. The discussion is endless. What is there to discuss about such a simple thing? The true meaning of cosmetics is expensive, and the true meaning of clothes is It’s the face that’s good, but the true meaning of pants is that the legs are thin.
15. Today I habitually lit a cigarette in the coffee shop. After taking two puffs, I suddenly remembered that second-hand smoke is harmful to other people’s health. I felt very ashamed, so I asked Wang Chao to They were all kicked out. ***Brother *** went to discuss business. When he disagreed, the other party held a watermelon knife on his neck. "Hahahahaha" he laughed. The other party asked in confusion: "What...are you laughing at...?" Zhenhua shrank his neck and said: "****^__^**** Hee hee, I'm ticklish."
Super funny and humorous Joker ***Classic***
1. When I went downstairs to pick up the express delivery, I saw that the down jacket worn by the courier was the same one I bought online. I said: What a coincidence, I also bought one of this. . He took it off as he said, "This is yours. The car can't fit it in, so I have to wear it."
2. I told Wang Chao: "If Ma Jianguo doesn't pay back the money, you can use red paint to write [debt repayment] on his door." After three months of debt collection, Wang Chao won the Third prize in our county youth calligraphy competition.
3. ***It’s snowing heavily today. I just went out and saw an uncle fall down. I went over and asked: Uncle, I don’t have enough money for one month’s salary, can I help you up? Uncle: Young man, You go, I'll wait for a while. Me: Okay, thank you uncle! Although the weather is cold, your words are warm and full of positive energy. . .
4. Shopping malls and supermarkets will automatically be divided into three types at the end of the year. The first type is circling the Chinese doll's "Prosperity and Prosperity Chinese New Year", and the second type is circling Andy Lau's "Gong Xi Fa Cai". The third type is to play two songs together in a loop.
5. I have fallen in love with Chen Yanxi. I want to canonize her as my Duner Promise. When I am in a bad mood, I wave my sleeves and say, come on, send me my Duner Promise. , asked her to do whatever she wanted to make me laugh for a while, and soon I heard the sound of shaking footsteps approaching from a distance
6. Where have I seen you?
7. On a rainy day, a young girl was running in the rain. I was deeply touched and advised her: "Girl, don't run away. If you don't have an umbrella, just find a place to hide from the rain." She said: "***Don't run away. , return the umbrella to me!"
8. After a heart-to-heart talk with classmate Wang Xiaomeng, I said: "The most fearful thing about learning is persistence. I was just like you back then, and my English was not good, but every day I I insist on memorizing ten words before going to bed..." Wang Xiaomeng asked hurriedly: "Is it effective?" "Hard work pays off," I said, "After three years, I finally memorized these ten words."
9. Bai Fumei went shopping and got big bags, the green tea bitch met the uncle and the little brother when she went shopping, the rotten girls went shopping and found a big attack and a small one, the cute girl made all kinds of fuss when going shopping, and Domei Yuan could only yell and scream when he went shopping. The man keeps talking about the little bitch when he goes shopping.
10. It’s the time of year to make pickled noodles again. People in the Northeast go out of their homes one after another, holding kitchen knives and waiting at places with iron railings, waiting for curious southerners to lick them.
11. There is a sign on the lawn of the park that reads: "Trample on the lawn, ***". Later it was changed to "***". Asked the staff in the park: "Why is it lowered? Isn't it a penalty?" The staff replied: "It can't be done without changing it. No one will step on it."
12. Who gave Yin Zhiping a foreign name? The one who calls Dragon Knight is so funny...
13. I have learned a lot of methods from doctors in the past few days to make up the word count for my graduation thesis. For example, "" can be written as "the early 1990s".
14. When I first entered adolescence, I hated a man named Mosaic the most. Later, after I got married, I hated a man named Ma Yun the most. Now that I have children, I hate a man named Ma Huateng the most.
15. Teacher: There is news this morning. The content is that a child was hit by a car and flew out unscathed. Because he was cushioned by a schoolbag full of books, he was okay, so knowledge changes his destiny. Xiao Ming: If he hadn’t been carrying such a heavy schoolbag, he would have crossed the road long ago. Teacher: Get lost
Super funny and humorous jokes ***Selected articles***
1. On a rainy day, I saw Couples were holding umbrellas on the sidewalk, walking intimately together, but I had no one to care for, no one to love me, and no umbrella.
Thinking of this, I couldn't help but feel sad. I lay on the steering wheel of the Lamborghini and cried.
2. Brothers are like brothers and sisters, women are like clothes. Recently one of my siblings went to Thailand to have himself processed into a piece of clothing.
3. The first time she had physical contact with her male idol was on the school playground. The male idol hugged her tightly and said, "Thanks to your participation, our class can win the men's tug-of-war competition." First place."
4. "Xiao Lei, I heard that your major in college is fluid mechanics?" "Yes, leader." "Okay, go get me a glass of water." "Leader. , please respect this profession, fluid mechanics is..." "Please talk about the application of non-isentropic steady-state compressible magnetohydrodynamics equations in sustained plasma confinement controlled thermonuclear fusion" "Leader, drink water. Where is the machine?"
5. When I was a kid, my parents always beat me when I was shopping. Usually it's "Dad! Lock the door!" Then they grab me and start beating me. After the beating, I felt distressed: "Silly boy, why don't you run away..." Mom!! Where should I run? . never mind. Just be happy.
6. There is a village that is so poor that it is difficult for young men to find wives. The young man has brought many girls home to meet him, but they all failed because he could not afford a house. Summarizing the previous experience and lessons, he bought a bucket of red paint and on the way from the village to his home, whenever he saw a flat wall, he painted big "demolished" characters on it. Later he got married. Later, the young men in the village also married wives one after another.
7. A group of parent-child love dialogues collected on the daily push. I was so cute that I was blown away by the group that made animal sounds!
8. The only thing that can drive an adult to say goodbye to the warm quilt and leave the house on time, regardless of the cold wind and white dew outside, every morning from Monday to Friday, is poverty.
9. There is a school near where I live. Every morning the school radio will play songs, and every time there is Little Apple. I like to hide in bed and listen to the songs on the radio. Every time I listen to When Little Apple sings "Winter Snowflakes Are Flying with You," she will shout with all the students in the school: "More! Add! Warmth! Warmth!" Then get up quickly and start an energetic day
10. Doctor Wang's child comes to the department after school and waits for his father. It's quite cute. I asked what I had learned in school. She said that I had learned mathematics. Then let me test you on what time? The child counted the numbers with his little hands and replied: Then? There was a pop and the yogurt in his hand fell to the ground. .
11. “I don’t object to my boyfriend going out to drink or smoke. I don’t object to playing games with him. I don’t object to watching the World Cup with him. I also like American blockbusters, but why can’t I find him? Got a boyfriend? "No one would marry a brother back home!"
12. On the way home, I saw two naughty children arguing again. One of the children suddenly pointed at me and yelled at the other. One said: "You are like this when you grow up." The two people who were not arguing very fiercely are now fighting each other!
13. So cute and masculine
14. Divine equipment. . .
15. I confess to the goddess: If I were a drop of water, I would form the Pacific Ocean for you. If I were a star, I would form the Pacific Ocean for you. If I were a diamond, I would make it a crown on your head. Goddess: I would turn you into a cucumber.