The gentle girl will look more lovely than a big grinning woman. Some girls are rough, bad-tempered and spiteful, not to mention the fact that they can't find a boyfriend, but they are just a step behind others in terms of temperament! Girls, you have to remember: if you are not gentle, no one will really see you as a woman.
The tenderness is not equal to the ZUO!
Some people will counter with "I'm such a woman, I can't do the tenderness of the dainty". Yes, because you have this kind of thinking, so you can't be gentle. Do you have such an emotion in your heart: gentle=no personality=submissive=ZUO, I'm a woman, I'm straightforward, I like to be myself, so I'm not gentle, I'm rude, I'm spiteful, it's all because I'm sincere!
Don't be silly! If you have this kind of idea, please must must must must throw it away quickly! Because being gentle is not the same as being unprincipled!
Many girls have a very wrong idea in their mind that being gentle will make them look like a bully, and they will be considered weak ah, this is definitely a big mistake. Gentle refers to a mild temper (attitude can be firm), considerate of others, speak and do things to make themselves and also make others comfortable. Becoming gentle doesn't make you lose yourself, on the contrary, you can communicate more effectively with those around you.
There are some women who are particularly short-tempered, but their boyfriends cheat on them and beg them to start thinking about whether they want to make up; and there are some girls who are very mild-tempered, but once they have violated her principles, they will immediately cut off their friendships with that person, and they will never come back to each other.
The former is called a paper tiger, bullying, low emotional intelligence, deserve to be bullied to death; the latter is called a good deal, have principles, so the woman is only pleasing to the eye.
Cultivate a comfortable tenderness
Want to become a tender person, we must first change from the inside. Realize that consideration for others, thoughtfulness, and politeness are all virtues, and that having these virtues will not only make your love life go smoothly, but will also allow you to avoid social trouble in your life. Becoming gentle is like losing weight, you can't get fat in one bite, but you can become a gentle girl inside and out by reading; by dressing, grooming, and talking, pretending to be gentle (when in fact, you often growl inside).
Don't take "girlie" as a reason for you not to be gentle, you can also choose to be a gentle girl, you can also cultivate yourself into a girl who makes people feel very comfortable.
1, cultivate your outside: at least let yourself look gentle
First of all, you have to "gentle" your outside, dress can be a good reflection of your personal temperament. Don't talk about "inner beauty", a person can't even take care of their own appearance, with what capital to tell people that you take care of their inner? You don't need to force yourself to use those unaffordable clothes and cosmetics, but you should at least "fix" yourself.
If you want to look cute and gentle, try to dress in warm colors + delicate + cute little details + don't wear anything random. Whether it is Europe and the United States or Japanese style, pay attention to the color scheme, details, do not just wear a piece to go out. Body if not good enough to buy clothes must first try, install a large mirror to the home, fashion magazines must be read regularly.
Whether it's supermodels, office workers, students, everyone is unanimous in their love of jeans + T-shirt. Yes, jeans are very comfortable, but ...... it's really super easy to turn into a disaster! Especially thick legs MM, you find a friend to take a shot of you wearing jeans back, you know you should not wear it. T-shirt is also a very test of collocation efforts, as far as possible to choose some of the design sense of the T-shirt, rather than Taobao 30 yuan 1 piece of the kind. If you haven't got a good pair of shoes and bag, this kind of makeup will quickly fall into the road.
You have to realize: the handsome look of wearing jeans + T-shirt is the patent of thin and tall people. So, if you feel like you're not in perfect shape, you have the option of training to spruce up your body line. Otherwise, do everything you can to wear dresses, pick something cute or with a little bit of design. Don't ever feel comfortable and look good in just anything. You have to realize that for the most part, being comfortable and looking good are slightly contradictory.
For women, there are also details such as hair that falls out of color after dyeing, hair that is oiled, nail polish that falls off, and so on, which can make people feel very, very, very uncomfortable! Important thing to say three times! And it will make you look very sloppy.
OK, if you're going to dye your hair or put color on it, no problem. But if you ever lose the color, make sure you go get it filled in, because hair that's black and yellow in one section is really ugly. If you are going to dye your hair, or get your nails done, make sure your hair color is soft and shiny, fluffy and full, and your nails are clean. This is essential for a healthy woman. If you don't have it, get your health back first before you think about these things, at least a healthy woman looks more comfortable.
2, gentle your inner: enhance your temperament
Many times, you can't be gentle because you are slightly grumpy. I know that there are times when a bad temper is actually a sign of a bad brain. It's that there are a lot of problems that you don't know how to solve, and without learning at all, you're very good at anxiety; and secondly, no one has taught you to control your temper since you were a kid, so you're nothing but a cathartic!
If you want to make your inner self gentle too, you must usually read more books with academics and less messy YY novels.YY novels like this will be more and more obscene the more you read them. If you don't know where to start, why don't you just choose one of your favorite arts to start with, for example, if you like religious music, you might as well start reading from the Bach era, listen to it more, and slowly your knowledge will become more and more extensive, and finally your knowledge will be reflected in your temperament.
There is extra time to cultivate and develop a few hobbies that you are interested in, to increase your own knowledge and sense of beauty.Coco Chanel once said: 20 years old, you have the natural growth of the face; 30 years old, life experience makes your face has a personal mark; 50 years old, all of your life is written on your face. Beauty decays with age, while temperament increases dramatically. It's when 20, 30 years later that elegance adds up for you.
Learn some kind of dance on weekends, go to a yoga studio three times a week, learn to paint oil paintings, learn a simple piano piece every month, and go out to the outside world when you have time to see ...... But don't tell me that your hobbies are shopping for clothes, singing karaoke, staying at home to watch Korean dramas, and eating!OK, that's fine too, but You have to make sure:
You like shopping, it lets you learn about different products from different brands, improves your fashion sense, and you find your own style; you like singing, which gives you a better understanding of tone and melody, and pushes you to have a greater interest in exploring the field of music; and you like watching Korean dramas, which allows you to master a new language and gain insights into the culture of a different country. (However, if you simply like to watch bloodthirsty Korean dramas, it is advisable to go for American dramas, at least you can train your English skills); you like to eat, you are interested in the kitchen, you cook different dishes and food, and master a good hand at cooking.
If your favorite hobby doesn't make you have blah blah blah changes to improve, then you can drop that hobby.
3, cultivate the good habit of gentleness: put the heart a little more fine
Many "women" are very thick hearted people, many things in life will not notice, but sometimes will accidentally offend others. So, do things must be focused, put the heart a little more careful, think more about others, will become a comfortable gentle woman!
▲When you talk to others, make sure to smile and have your mouth slightly curved up. Remember, even on the phone to remember to smile, the other side can actually hear your expression Oh; if there is a long time to see friends or friends from afar, remember to give them a small "gift"; and people walk with each other, in the other when you need to, in a timely manner, handing over the paper towels.
▲▲Dining out to be polite to the service staff; eating when someone is late will take the initiative to get up and smile. The first thing you need to do is to make sure that you don't make any noise when you're eating; don't pick and choose, and clip away wherever your chopsticks touch; use your pinky to cushion your cups, and put them down slowly; use a napkin that will be folded over, and don't put the scuff marks on the outside.
▲Walking not in the crowded channel suddenly stop, pay attention to give way to people, always check their own things have not blocked others; into the door when the back of the door to leave a little door and nodded and smiled a little; elevator overloaded when the initiative to go down, even if you're not the last one on.
4, change your way of speaking: speak a little euphemism will not die
"Toxic tongue" and "spit" is a very cool thing, but it is not very cute. It's kinda cute to troll once a week, but it's too annoying to troll every day. Moreover, sometimes some trolls are built on the basis of "distorting the facts", "random definition", not to mention the love of trolls for their own way of thinking things are not favorable, you just think about it, covered in negative energy and poisonous tongue, really can be and the god of the man in the right place? The first thing you need to do is to get your hands dirty.
Speaking politely, a certain degree of consideration for the other side of the performance, a person can be considered for others, in fact, is the gentle embodiment of the educated.
There are several keys to speaking politely:
▲More honorifics, such as "excuse me", "please", "thank you", "please", "please". I'm sorry," "please," "thank you," "can I trouble you," "thank you so much," and so on. Saying honorifics with a smile on your face makes you look polite, gentle and cute.
▲Don't be so direct in your speech, consider the other person's feelings first, and then put forward your own needs. For example, if you want the other party to help you make a PPT, don't directly say "can you help me make a PPT?". Rather, you should ask the other party whether the time is convenient, and tell the other party why this thing needs to cooperate with the other party, as well as the importance of the matter, and then finally and the other party to confirm whether it can help your favor. Coming up with requests is a particularly obnoxious thing to do.
▲Don't check your account! Never come up and ask where you live? I'm not going to be able to do that, but I'm not going to be able to do that. I'm not sure how much I'm going to be able to afford it. I'm not going to be able to get a good deal on this one. Thank you! You're not selling insurance, nor are you checking accounts. It's important to respect other people's privacy, so if you really want to ask, you have to say "I don't know if it's convenient to know your name/age?
▲Speak slower and lower your voice. You're not a food vendor, so don't yell and scream at me. And don't swear or say anything like "fuck you" or "fuck you". You don't want to be a Liangshan warrior, so be polite, and the other person will feel better. However, never use snail's pace of speech to speak, which ...... will ...... make ...... people ...... very ...... painful ...... bitter ...... If you don't know how to grasp it well, you can record an audio of your own speech at home and listen to yourself to figure it out.
In fact, gentleness is like the warm sunshine of an autumn day, which will pass through the cracks of the layers of leaves and pour a fine piece of tenderness on the ground, warming other people's hearts. I hope that every one of you can become a woman who warms herself and can warm others.