The "Drapes" are wearing mourning clothes and a hemp wire around the waist, which is the highest form of filial piety for the elders who have passed away. In our local area, still in the stage of love, just friends is not wearing hemp, but only wear a mourning cap.
Mourning etiquette is very elaborate. Where the deceased with the same generation, the late generation of neighbors and friends, with the share of money, the steward will give you a top mourning cap for you to wear. Of course, everyone who comes to help also wear. Local this courtesy is called scattered "sea filial piety", a large yard, white, very sad.
Linen wearing mourning shirt (i.e., mourning clothes), there are only three kinds of people. First, the children, nephews (female), dry children (female). On this filial shirt, is also relatively provincial, that is, not out of the "five services" cousin nieces and nephews, their filial shirts are their respective families to buy and sewing; bereaved family only for their own children, son-in-laws and godchildren (daughters) of the filial shirt to buy cloth sewing. After the death of their loved ones will be wearing mourning clothes.
As a son-in-law, "wearing hemp mourning" to wait until the day of the funeral, that is, the day of the event. There is a local saying "wear mourning clothes, sheep call", meaning that the day of the funeral, the son-in-law only brought a cotton sheep, will give a piece of mourning clothes. This is originally agreed, son-in-law more, do not want to hold sheep, or, with a close to the price of the sheep's share of the money, the word of mouth will be good, will also win enough face. This is the sheep, but also not at that time on the slaughter to eat, but by the owner of the family grazing, to the third anniversary of the death of the event will be slaughtered.
There is another kind of person who has to wear a mourning shirt, and that is the nephew. The nephews are also the closest relatives, they wear mourning clothes only on the day of the funeral, with a share of the money, the management will give you. The first thing that you need to do is to get your hands on a new one, and then you'll be able to get your hands on a new one.
Filial piety shirt is so wear, don't forget to tie a hemp wire around the waist, only then, it is considered to be the greatest filial piety to the deceased!
Don't look at this filial piety cap, filial piety shirt and so on, how to deal with it afterwards? In the local, those who wore the mourning cap, after attending the funeral out, are their own sewing according to the needle and thread dismantled. Some people took home to do the upper, some people simply threw away. Because when the funeral, neighbors and friends no longer need to wear a mourning hat.
Wearing a mourning shirt are "true" filial son, their mourning shirt to wear to the funeral, but also to wash the stacked in the first, second and third anniversary of the deceased to wear, when the mourning shirt is already pulled up the kind. After the third anniversary of the day of sacrifice, the respective mourning clothes can be used as bedding.
It turned out that this wear (wear) filial piety have to pay attention to, filial piety shirt is more unusual, as a girlfriend's friend, after the death of her mother is not "son-in-law". If you wear, less than three years on the day of the sacrifice, in case not even "friends" have not been made, how to deal with the mourning shirt? Therefore, it is reasonable not to wear mourning clothes as a friend. However, it has been engaged, that is to "wear hemp wearing mourning", at least in our local is so.
@Refreshing for life
Seems like a simple sentence, but there are a lot of articles, depending on the local customs of each place, the answer is certainly not the same. If in our hometown in the countryside, like your situation has different treatment. First, you said it was your girlfriend's mom who passed away, so you're definitely not married. To go to the funeral is certainly, as for wearing hemp mourning that depends on the two of you, if you have been dating for a long time, and both parents know and have agreed, then you should bring red mourning. This way, people will know that you are an unmarried son-in-law. If both parents have not explicitly agreed to your marriage, then you do not need to wear hemp mourning. However, if you two have reached a certain level and both of you have decided to marry each other, you can also wear the red mourning, but it must be the red mourning. This is just a rural custom in our hometown.
Brother, there is no need to do so, you and your girlfriend and then good relations, as long as there is no marriage license, then it is the lack of legal status, and like the funeral of this solemn occasion, is the most serious, you as a son-in-law to the door Phi Ma Daixiao, the name is not justified, it is inappropriate to use our hometown words, which is "not in the speak! "
Of course, you are not not allowed to go to the door, you can go to your girlfriend's home to do your best, kowtow a few heads, on the point of favor, but Phi Ma Dai Xiaojiao is completely unnecessary, and may be added to the snake, you have that sincerity, people may not allow it. The first thing you need to do is to get your hands on some of the most popular products and services in the world, and then you can get your hands on some of the most popular ones.
A little off-topic, I do not know your local funeral customs, in our hometown, even if it is a serious son-in-law, do not need to wear mourning, mourning that are filial sons and daughters filial grandchildren of the matter, they need to wear white mourning clothes, but also head wearing a mourning hat. In our local, if the parents-in-law died, the son-in-law does not need to wear mourning clothes, and also do not need to go to the parents-in-law home in advance, they only need to arrive the next night and the day of the funeral can be, in the funeral, the waist send a white cloth belt, so in our local funeral, as long as we see a male waist wrapped cloth belt, it is definitely a son-in-law status.
I remember when I was a child, there is a custom in the countryside, some of the old age of the elderly died, we called the happy burial, the villagers look around the funeral, the most favorite to see is the son-in-law kowtow, which is almost the biggest point of view in the funeral.
It's not a question of whether you should or shouldn't, the key is to look at the degree of recognition of the woman's family. The woman's family on your marriage if not yet optimistic, this time you want to wear mourning people will not give you to break the filial piety, that in their hearts you are still outsiders. If the woman's family is very optimistic about your marriage, and has recognized you, they will take the initiative to discuss with you. If you are willing to wear it, they will break the mourning clothes for you, and at the same time prove that you are serious about recognizing the marriage. If you don't want to wear it, they won't give you broken mourning clothes, but they will certainly have thoughts in their hearts.
There is a lot to learn about wearing mourning clothes, and the customs are different in different places. We here son-in-law is not required to wear mourning, but in the broken filial piety, some will take the initiative to ask for mourning, some people do not care. Although the main family does not break the mourning for them, the impression left on the mourners is different. In the funeral, some son-in-law will also cry, really good feelings will also be tears, is a tear, can be close to the emotional distance, so that the main family treat you differently,
Only the true feelings of sad tears!
On the godparents (godson or goddaughter) wear mourning more delicate. After the death of the godfather or godmother, the general mourning family will not give at the same time to break the filial piety. If their relationship is very good, the funeral home will take the initiative to find him at the funeral, ask him where the mourning clothes, which is to remind him that they are a family, did not take him as an outsider. This is to remind him that they are a family and do not treat him as an outsider. At this point, if he is willing to wear mourning clothes for the deceased, he has to go immediately to get the mourning clothes.
A piece of mourning clothes inside wrapped in four attitudes, two kinds of wisdom. Mourners recognize the attitude of their own willingness or unwillingness to recognize the attitude in a sentence completely expressed, the future of the emotional problems at a glance.
Take myself as an example, it happens to be less than a month since my godfather died, it is December 5th, I am still struggling with grief.
When my godfather was dying, my brother called me. Because we are very affectionate, the relationship of more than thirty years makes us like a family. I am very lucky, in his old man's dying days, the consciousness is still in a clear condition with the old man said a few times in the heart. After the incident, the three brothers looked at the cemetery together and invited the coffin. Of course, it is the first open mouth, I am very happy to accompany, godfather in my heart and father is no different, the old man died after I was heartbroken, crying a couch. Because it is the godfather, when I broke the mourning clothes, there is no me, I do not dare to venture to ask, for fear of currying favor. I could only serve people diligently, do what I could and keep the wake. The first thing that I can do is to make sure that I have a good understanding of what I'm doing and how I'm doing it.
Until the funeral, my aunt asked me about my mourning clothes, and I immediately replied that they were in the back room, and I was just going to wear them! The first thing I did was to go to the back room with my aunt to break the mourning clothes. The mourning clothes had to be carefully kept, and had to be worn on every day of the festival, and they would not be disposed of until three years after the festival. In order to show respect to the old man, my mourning clothes and righteous brother and sister theirs in a place, do not dare to bring back to their own home.
As long as the woman agrees with you to bring filial piety, and emphasize that you bring, then firmly bring! This is at least a sign that the "rice in the pot" will be cooked soon! [face]
Door nooks and crannies of the fireworks, and can not wait until dark, her mother died, as a boyfriend, now should not have established any relationship with her family, you go to her mother's funeral in the name of what? Son or son-in-law? Actually you are nothing now.
Even if you are married, you become a real son-in-law, there is no such thing as wearing mourning. A son-in-law is just like anyone else, just wearing a mourning cap, and I've never heard of wearing mourning.
If your daughter-in-law is the only daughter, their family business by your inheritance, as a son-in-law you should do a son's duty, for the old man to wear hemp mourning, wrestling U basin. If people have children, these things are not your turn to do.
If you're not married, we don't move around here for funerals. If the woman's family manpower is not enough, as a boyfriend and girlfriend, you come to help is possible, as for to wear hemp mourning, to the ground to send funeral, it is not necessary.
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His own parents are still there, you give someone else to wear mourning ~ really line ah buddy.
Girlfriends only ~ not married even if engaged should not go to engage in those, have the heart to pay tribute to a few incense sticks on the good, soothing appeasement of your girlfriend, help to see what is within your reach.
This is not a happy fucking thing, you rushed to go to ~ to put it bluntly, you go to the outsiders to wear mourning, may soon be attracted to the bad things, and then your family if something happened, you regret it too late.
Secondly, the girlfriend's family does not have a son?
This is the first time I've ever seen a girl who has a son.
You know her parents, since childhood relationship? A stranger, you look at the dead body in the coffin, you do not creep out?
The first seven have not yet passed ~ you do not have the identity of the ass, to go to people's homes to take this funeral work [tears] [tears] [tears] [tears] [tears] your brain has not been caught in the door into a piece of paper ah.
Your girlfriend is also a fool? Only child? She can be a family member?
If there is a son in the family, how can a girl not be able to do this?
If your parents know that you want to rush to others as a fake son, they will be angry.
If you are married, you are not responsible for it.
You do not have a single eight children, at most go to see a favor on the good, comfort, comfort her, when buried on the column of incense to buy some paper burned to your girlfriend's mother are considered affordable to her.
But then again ~ your girlfriend is really good [face] [face] [face] [face]
actually dare to pull this kind of people to their own mother's spirit hall ~ how are inappropriate ah.
The family's seven aunts and eight aunts saw it ~ may be how to make up your mind, said you do not know how to do ~ what people dare to bring home.
But my family is not so engaged ~ wear a white dress these. I feel scared ~
There is no custom of wearing hemp and mourning ~ dead on the dead just like this. Maybe there is, but I have not seen ~ are dead and then beat the gong and drums [face] [face] [face] [face] [face] close family members may howl ~ after all, too sad.
Then there are programs ~ singing dancing ~ side and playing mahjong ~ those who participate in the funeral will watch the program or play mahjong ~ swing Dragon Gate and so on [I want to be quiet]
cloak. If the marriage, the big deal is that you made a fool of yourself. If there is a marriage, you can claim a lot of fake filial son filial grandson in place of money. Bai Yilou view; friends are not son-in-law, the object is not an old man, did not enter the establishment, peddling cheap but also inviting laughter and joy.
Ignorance and ignorance still have a big market today! Why can't you wear mourning clothes when your girlfriend's mother died? The first thing you need to do is to get your hands on a new pair of shoes and boots! Of course, modern society does not advocate the traditional way! But wearing a black veil and white flowers throughout the send-off is the way of etiquette!
Son-in-law from ancient times called half a son, daughter-in-law is also half a daughter. In fact, people are emotional animals, as long as they get along for a long time will naturally produce feelings.
As a girlfriend's boyfriend has the obligation to take the initiative to help his girlfriend to take care of her mother's funeral, which is also common sense. It is a part of the obligation! There is no reason to refuse to participate.
2019.12.23!
Girlfriend's mom, not married, not part of their family, so you do not need to wear hemp mourning.
Do not wear hemp mourning does not mean that you do not have to take care of anything, if you especially love this girl, you should take up a man's responsibility to help him take care of everything at home, to do something in addition to the son-in-law outside of the mourning should do all the matters, because you chose her, should share the pain for her to take care of everything for her.
It is said that the man is a woman's day, mom and dad are children's umbrella , the girl's mother is not there, should be particularly painful, you need to be this piece of heaven to love and care, to care, to take up the responsibility of her mother, so that it fully feel the loss of relatives do not lose love.
A person's life is very short, since the choice of each other, while choosing the responsibility and obligation, the epidermis of the things do not matter, the most important thing is the inner from the heart of that love, people are not grass, you give it sunshine, it will return you brilliant [Rose] [Rose] [Rose]