I have an older brother above me, and if my brother gets married, I'll become a "sister-in-law" role, but my brother is currently a "non-marriageist", the mother is single for nearly thirty years, so I don't know if I still have the luck to be a "sister-in-law", so I don't know if I have the luck to be a "sister-in-law". I'm not sure if I'll ever have the luck to be the "little sister".
But I used to fantasize that if one day my brother got the hang of it and married and had a child, I think the same woman, if my sister-in-law was aggrieved and I talked to her, I would be the first to fight with her on a united front, hahaha, that's what I'm talking about.
Back to the main topic, when it comes to raising children to prevent old age, I believe this is the traditional practice of most families in China.
However, with the development of society, the pressure of people's lives is getting bigger and bigger, and nowadays young people, their own lives are still not enough to take care of themselves, not to mention supporting their parents.
Perhaps they will not shirk their responsibility to support, but more often than not, they are unable to do so.
I as a daughter, parents gave life, raising adults spent a lot of time and energy, not to mention my parents in the patriarchal do quite a "bowl of water end of the level", so I will not say that because I am a daughter married, it is "pouring out of the water! "I'm not going to say that I'm not a good person, but I'm a good person.
I will still care for my parents, filial piety, and will not let my brother shoulder all the support obligations, which has nothing to do with the good or bad economic conditions, unless I am too poorly mixed (which is very unlikely, and I will not allow myself to do so).
So on this point, I can make it clear to both my brother and sister-in-law and my parents when I have a sister-in-law as well, so that my brother and sister-in-law have at least one less thing to worry about in this regard.
Back to today's question, "every family has its own problems", and even close people living together will inevitably have friction, not to mention between two generations, so it's not surprising that my brother and sister-in-law and my parents are both "complaining" to me, and I'd be very happy to hear from them. The first thing I'd like to say is that I'm not sure if I'm going to be able to do this, but I'm sure that I'm going to be able to do this, and I'm sure that I'm going to be able to do this, and I'm sure that I'm going to be able to do this, and I'm sure that I'm going to be able to do this.
First, I will look at whether my brother and sister-in-law are really unwilling to take care of the elderly, whether it is because of their character, or just because the actual situation does not allow them to do so, and there are financial difficulties that they can not afford to take care of.
2. If it's because of a very bad character problem (which my brother definitely won't be), basically you're even using legal weapons to enforce it, but it's also a laborious thing to do, and it'll make the parents even more chilled out and desperate.
So, in this case, I will communicate with my husband to discuss renting a house near my home to take care of them from time to time.
3. If your parents have lost their ability to take care of themselves, then you should hire a live-in nanny. The biggest prerequisite for this is that it is within your financial means and does not affect your husband's lifestyle too much, and you must be able to reach an understanding with your husband and get his understanding and support, and it must not affect your husband and wife's relationship.
Of course, some of the costs can be negotiated with the brother and sister-in-law, but where they have a conscience will also agree to this program.
4. In case you don't even want to give the money, it's okay, I'll take the responsibility, and at the same time, let your parents break the idea of brother and sister-in-law, don't let your parents do "thankless" things, such as to help them to do housework and bring up the children, etc., so that your parents can relax and live their own lives, and your daughter is their strong backing.
5. If it's just because your brother and sister-in-law's circumstances don't allow them to do so, and they're in a difficult financial situation, then it's a good idea to do it, because anything that can be solved with money isn't a problem.
I will directly discuss with the brother and sister-in-law, how much actual difficulties, and their husbands also indicate that this situation, in their own conditions allow the case (economic ability than the brother and sister-in-law), on the support of parents on the economic support to bear a little bit more;
At the same time, also want to appease the parents, tell them that the brother and sister-in-law really have difficulties, the heart for the parents are all hope that their own children are good, and they will not think too much. The first thing you need to do is to get your hands dirty.
Second, play the role of a lubricant, do not because of emotional and subjective favoritism to one side
After finding the reasons for their conflicts, only need to objectively analyze the facts, directly solve the problem, as a daughter of the money on the money, the effort on the effort, not to let the brother and sister-in-law and the parents have to worry about.
But from the point of view of today's description of the problem, I think the two sides of the "emotional catharsis" of the possibility of greater,
At this time, as a daughter, as a sister-in-law, as a serious listener is best to pacify the two sides of the emotions, if blindly favor one side will only make the contradiction intensified, but also let yourself into the "The first thing you need to do is to get a good deal of money from the government.
For example, when my parents told me that my brother and sister-in-law were quarreling again because of the problems of the two old men, on the one hand, I would advise my parents to show that my brother and sister-in-law had no qualms about quarrelling with my parents in front of them, and that they really should not.
But on the other hand, I think: no one would like to quarrel, perhaps there is an unavoidable pain, or is not the brother and sister-in-law because of the work of the family encountered some problems affecting the income and expenditure, so the pressure is doubled, we can do is not to give the brother and sister-in-law to cause trouble, you are also more sympathetic to sympathy, do not look at the face of the sister-in-law, but also look at the face of the brother.
I believe that all parents want their children to be good, and the family and all things are good.
If the parents do not blame their own son instead of complaining about the sister-in-law trolling, I will stand in the sister-in-law's point of view to think more, or directly smile and ask the parents: then you see your son is perfect? Then I would give them a long list of things that are wrong with my brother. The only one who can take it is my sister-in-law, isn't it?
I believe that the parents will be relieved ~
Third, the brother (son) is the key
The problem description, the parents because the brother and sister-in-law quarrel to discuss the issue of old age and cold, sister-in-law also spit out their own is not easy, here they have an intersection - the brother, it can also be said to be the link.
Because of his brother, his sister-in-law, who originally had no blood relationship with his parents, lived together and had a connection;
Because of his brother, there was one more helper to support his parents with his own ****, calling his parents "Mom and Dad";
Also because of his brother, after he had a baby with his sister-in-law, his parents were given "grandparents";
Also because of his brother, after he had a baby with his sister-in-law, his parents were given "grandparents". The first thing you need to do is to get your hands on some of the most popular products and services in the world, and you'll be able to do that.
So it's clear how important his role is to their respective feelings and relationships.
So, I will find my brother at the right time to talk to him, sure brother and sister-in-law's contribution to the family, as well as the care of parents, is not recently encountered any difficulties, so sister-in-law a little aggravation, the woman is the most emotional animal, as your sister, standing and sister-in-law with the same woman's point of view is very understanding sister-in-law, and I hope that you as the closest husband more should be more heartbroken sister-in-law.
If I was aggrieved and unhappy with your brother-in-law every day to quarrel, brother will certainly also heartache me, right?
Parents live with you, if there is pressure can also say with me, parents look at you couple quarrel, only self-criticism is not to give you trouble, but also stifled not to say, parents are older in case of suffocation to the disease is not worth the loss.
Conclusion:
Almost 90% of the conflicts in the family life and money-related, and can be solved with money are not a problem.
Therefore, to enhance their own is the same as the eternal theme of the woman, not only men to take up this responsibility, so that, in the brother and sister-in-law encountered problems in the dispute, parents because of the old age problem worry will not let themselves be trapped in the passive, a lot of problems can be solved.