Happy families are similar, unfortunate families are different.
- Anna Karenina
(1)
The moment she got her divorce papers, Zhang Yuan felt a sense of total relaxation.
Zhang Yuan was born in 1987, and like most children from one-child families, she was pampered by her parents.
In her impression, her parents, as dual-income workers in a small county, gave her a carefree childhood despite their limited incomes, especially in terms of material resources, and always did their best to meet her requirements.
Good-looking clothes, beautiful hair cards, all kinds of toys, parents have to respond. The first thing you need to do is to get your hands on a new one, and then you'll be able to get your hands on a new one, and then you'll be able to get your hands on a new one.
After she grew up, she realized that her parents' financial condition was never generous, and that they were all trying to save money from their mouths, from their clothes, just to satisfy their daughter's little wish.
Zhang Yuan said, she is very regrettable, let down a piece of the parents' hard work.
After school, her academic performance has not been good, her parents tried all kinds of ways, tutors, training courses, but still no help. She believes that she is not the material of the study, simply broken cans, after graduating from junior high school, went to the secondary school, and then, read a not into the mainstream of the college.
In the relatives and friends of children of the same age, she is not the other side of the university.
When she was studying in junior college, she fell in love with her ex-husband, a man 20 years older than her, and they met through the Internet. At that time, love was everything, and she insisted on marrying him, defiantly.
Her parents persuaded her a few times, see her mind is made up, then no longer say anything, prepared a generous dowry to send her to get married.
She soon paid the price for her willfulness.
During this period, she had three miscarriages, and it is uncertain whether she will be able to get pregnant.
Finally, at the age of 28, she chose to divorce.
Zhang Yuan is glad she doesn't have a child, if she drags a child to live in the big city, no career, no network or even a stable job, she doesn't know if she can survive alone.
(2)
For years after the divorce, it was a hectic schedule of blind dates, dating, marriage, and breakups, with repeated failures, and unknowingly fear and doubt about marriage.
After the last relationship ended without any problems, Zhang Yuan completely died, and never trusted men again.
When she comes home occasionally, she sees her elderly parents living alone and relying on each other, and she is filled with self-loathing and regret.
Even with the divorce, she should have had a child. At least, the parents can get a hint of happiness and support from the child's smile and playfulness.
The life in the small county is simple and boring, even if it is a square dance, we talked about the most or the children's parents.
Zhang Yuan is well aware that her marriage has brought her parents too many criticisms, so that they can't hold up their heads in the neighborhood, but they have to be shy and worry about their own life.
Parents love her as always, no scolding, no complaints, even for fear of her sadness and embarrassment, did not say a bad word about her ex-husband.
By chance, Zhang Yuan learned that her ex-husband had secretly asked her parents for 100,000 dollars in her name before the divorce.
Zhang Yuan scolded her parents for giving the money away without asking her.
The father held his head, like a child who had done something wrong, and said carefully that he was worried that his ex-husband would be angry with his daughter for lack of money, and that he was afraid that his daughter would be aggrieved if he was married away from home alone.
At that moment, Zhang Yuan could not help but cry.
The first time I saw this, I was able to see the woman's face, and I was able to see the woman's face, and I was able to see the woman's face, and I was able to see the woman's face, and I was able to see the woman's face.
For a long time, the parents went around asking for help, and no matter how far and hard it was, they had to go in person to get a clear picture.
Looking at her parents' busy body, Zhang Yuan scolded herself for being an asshole, and it was too late for her to regret.
The first step in the process is to make sure that you have a good understanding of what is going on in the world.
(3)
On one of her long vacations, Zhang Yuan told her parents she would not go home, but she couldn't help but go back.
The moment she stepped through the door, her unprepared parents were sitting face to face, and on the table were two buckets of instant noodles, which they had prepared for themselves for dinner.
When Zhang Yuan called out to them, they looked at her with surprise. Her father jumped up and took her luggage, while her mother was busy cooking in the kitchen.
A stabbing pain went through Zhang Yuan's heart.
She doesn't regret any of the choices she made, and her heart aches for her elderly parents to bear the consequences with her.
It's not that she hasn't thought about returning to the small county and staying by her parents' side. She is already 35 years old, and does not expect to have a successful career and return home, she just wants to do her best to let her parents more or less have to rely on.
However, the cruel reality, she had to give up this idea.
The most important thing is that there is no money.
In the big city, although it is hard to work, but more or less can get nearly 10,000 dollars of salary per month. If you go back to your hometown, there are fewer job opportunities, and you don't have a skill set, so it's hard to find a good job.
The small county in the Mainland, or the human society, good work need to doorway, need favors, and even have to pay. The money thing is not to mention, the parents are very old, let them grovel to beg, Zhang Yuan can not do such a thing.
She spends as much time as possible at home during festivals, accompanying her parents and helping them make the necessary arrangements, such as overhauling the home appliances and taking them for a health check.
Of course, the most, or in the parents' arrangements, dating chat.
We have to admit that women in small counties, the depreciation speed is particularly fast, especially divorced older women, can be married, are a lucky thing.
Some people have been introduced to the old man, and some people have been introduced to the divorced man with a few children, a few times after, Zhang Yuan see do not want to see.
The small county is a small circle, everyone is familiar with the head, head up no see low see. The first time I saw this, I was able to get a good look at it, and I was able to get a good look at it, and I was able to get a good look at it.
She had to put up with all the gossip, and insisted on going home for the holidays.
The home town is her home, and there are her elderly parents.
(4)
It's getting harder and harder to maintain this kind of stability.
In their old age, their parents' health is getting worse and worse, because they don't want to be the talk of the town, and they are afraid to go out and spend money, so they watch TV at home all day long, and they save money on their meals.
The worst thing is that often the disease is not willing to go to the hospital, relying on the body to fight, delay again and again.
All of these things make Zhang Yuan anxious, but the good thing is that the parents have been good health, small illnesses, but there is no fatal disease.
This is probably a little bit of poor favor from heaven.
People in the metropolis, all alone, with not much more than a small salary, but also to miss the growing old parents, Zhang Yuan on their own life does not hold any hope.
Sometimes she wonders if it would have been better to have a sibling, at least to help her share some of the burden.
She doesn't know when she will break down.
She's prepared for the worst, and it doesn't matter what happens to her when her parents are 100 years old.
The only thing she can do now is to do what she can for her parents.
Conclusion:
In Anna Karenina, it is said that happy families are similar, and unfortunate families are different.
What happened to Zhang Yuan is certainly due to her own reasons, but it also reflects the helplessness of many one-child families.
The pressure of old age. When the only child is small, he or she enjoys the favor, and even the age of marriage and children, can still get the help of their parents. As people reach middle age, parents old, both parents of the company and care is difficult to balance, often lose sight of the other, tired to cope.
Economic pressure. Parents old, the body's various functions degenerate, sick hospitalization is a common occurrence, please nanny, hospital fees are a small expenditure, plus their own wife and children family, economic pressure can be imagined. If the old man is very sick, it is even worse.
Emotional pressure. People get older, emotionally more need companionship. One-child families, often because of the mother's home or the in-laws have conflicts, especially on New Year's holidays, it is difficult to balance the needs of both sides, thus affecting the relationship between the two families.
We are all in love with each other, and we are all in love with each other.
Respecting the elderly and caring for the young has always been a traditional virtue of the Chinese nation, and it is the duty of every child to let the elderly spend their twilight years in peace.
Life is hard, and there is always a need for someone to carry the load.
The world of adults has always been about courage, responsibility and commitment.
Tea and wine, reading the world, tasting life.
The rest of your life is long, try to be an interesting soul.
I am Mr. 28, looking forward to your wise eyes to see through human nature!