Jokes! Jokes are very funny

1. Colleagues to the field business trip, local colleagues hospitality, that night in a special hotel room set up a banquet to receive the wind. A dozen men and women were seated and then kept chatting, only one person in the food. Pointed out, to seek the views of the group: "dishes ordered, there is no need to add?"　> this situation, we in Beijing is generally let the lady to point out the name of the dishes reported again. So a Beijing buddy said, "Miss, report."　> The lady looked at him and didn't move.　> "Miss, report it!" The dude got a little anxious.　> The lady's face turned red, still didn't move.　> "What's the matter? Let you report a little did not hear?" Buddy really anxious.　> A female colleague hurriedly rounded up: "Miss, you just hurry to report it, ah."　> Miss mumbled and asked: "That, that ...... will hold the female, not hold the male line?"　> "Pfft!" The side of a female colleague just drank a large mouth of tea all sprayed on the front side of the person. A dozen people laughed at a ball, the lady is overwhelmed. 2. on the food, first on a mix of rappel. A large plate of rappel served up, followed by a few dishes of ingredients, sauces and so on. The lady did not pay attention when serving, a drop of sauce spilled on a buddy's pants. The buddy is also intended to tease, pretending to be grim and asked the lady: "how to do ah?"　> The lady calmly said, "Do whatever you want."　> "Then you say how to do?"　> "You want to do what to do?"　> "Then what do you do here?"　> "Why don't I do it for you?"　> "Okay."　> Just see the lady neatly pour a few plates of ingredients, sauce, a brain on the ramen, one hand with chopsticks, one hand with a > spoon, brush a few times to mix it. Then he said to the guy, "Sir, it's ready, you can eat now."　The guy stared at the plate of ramen without saying anything for half a day, and another colleague said "thank you" to the lady for him.3. The main course - roasted leg of lamb, a big plate of meat bones, a plate of salt and pepper. A Beijing buddies love this mouth, > nonchalantly grabbed a leg of lamb, click is a mouthful, croak croak croak eat up. When the lady saw it, she said: > "Sir, this should be dipped."　> Buddy will doubtfully look at the lady, and then look at the local colleagues. The local coworker said, "It tastes better when you dip it."　> The man then took the leg of lamb and stood up, clicked another bite.　> The lady rushed over and asked, "Sir, do you need anything?"　> "Ah? No."　> "Then please sit down and eat."　> Dude mutters and sits down, looking at the group, bewildered. Carefully, he brought the leg of lamb to his mouth and carefully took a bite.　> The lady adds, "Sir, this needs to be dipped."　> Buddy stood up, waving the leg of lamb angrily yelled: "and to stand and eat, and to sit and eat, in the end how to eat!"　4. Wine and food full, the leader hobbled to.　> full of rise to welcome, a chilling sound.　> Next to the banquet lady very beautiful, new, inexperienced, quite some tension.　> all seated, someone greeted: "Miss, tea!"　> Miss busy close to point with a finger: "1, 2, 3, 4, 5, 6, 7, **** seven!"　> the crowd laughed, the leader added: "Pour tea!"　> Miss busy "check" again: "7, 6, 5, 4, 3, 2, 1, or seven."　> Someone asked: "What are you counting?"　> The lady hesitated for a moment and replied in a low voice: "I belong to the dog."　> the crowd angry, urgent call: "Call your manager!" The manager entered, hung his hands and smiled, and asked: "Gentlemen, what is the matter with me?"　> Leader said: "Do not ask, go to check the age of the young lady's phases."　> Manager wondered, according to the order, spinning to reply: "18 years old, belong to the dog!"　> Leaders laughed, the crowd laughed. Leaders do not do not pursue the amount of sea, the amount of people inconvenience to pursue. 5. Wine over thirty years, come up with a dish: "Stewed Wang Bastard!"　> All people are happy, but did not forget the rules, someone with chopsticks to dial the head of the eight said: "Leaders move, leaders move!　> The leader looked at the turtle head was dialed chaotically trembling, the heart is not happy, both do not want to harmonize the end of the words and do not want to disobey the good intentions of the crowd, so it is to hold a spoon to drink soup, said: "good, good! Everyone please feel free."　> Another person flattered said: "right - the king should drink soup!" The leader was so angry that he almost spewed rice.　> a few days, the soup will be exhausted, something round floating out, asked: "Miss, what is this?"　> Miss busy answer: "is a son of a bitch." Crowd and surprise: "Leaders eat first, leaders eat first!"　> this this leader did not hear the "bad luck" words, very happy, called Miss: "for everyone to share!"　> for a long time, the lady did not move, the leader asked angrily: "How, this is not clear?"　> Miss difficult to say: "seven people, six bastards, you ask me how to share ah?"　> The crowd listened, each stretched his neck and stared, full of food, difficult to swallow. `