Looking at these amazing figures, I am a little flustered. Just like the song "I am old in an instant", "How can I be old when I just learn to be sensible, how can I be old when I just learn to be tolerant, how can I be old when I don't know where to go, and how can I be old before I get there?"
Listening to the familiar melody, you will sigh the ruthlessness of the years. Of course, no matter how sad we are, everyone will grow old. This is an unchangeable fact and an indisputable fact. When a person is really old, he will become lonely, helpless and even sigh. No matter what, it can't stop the pace of getting old. Then when we are old, we must have a clear understanding and planning of our life, and don't be helpless when there is trouble. When you get old, you must guard against these three "soft spots", which is very realistic and helpless.
0 1. Loneliness
Ji Bolun said:
"Loneliness is a sad companion and a close friend of spiritual activities."
But many women always seem to appreciate the former but not the latter, so she always feels that it is better to have a marriage with a man, even if the marriage is worse and the man is scum, it is better than nothing.
Aunt Wang is an old friend of my mother. She married a poor family when she was young. The man has three brothers and is penniless, but Aunt Wang just likes him and can't persuade him at home. At that time, she got married without asking for a penny.
The marriage has been very smooth, but since my husband took charge of the power station in the village, the days began to change quietly. The power station is a fat job, and my husband studies well. Soon, the technology is getting better and better, and there are more private jobs, and my husband's purse is also bulging. It is true that people become bad when they are rich. Her husband will have an affair soon. Aunt Wang is not ignorant, but pretends not to know. She is timid and doesn't want to make any noise. She thinks that her husband is tired of playing and will come back sooner or later. Besides, they all have children and she is willing to wait. But the husband couldn't resist the noise of the new couple, so he showed his cards to Aunt Wang and finally left, but Aunt Wang was very reluctant.
After the divorce, Aunt Wang is much better than before. We all think her marriage is right, but Aunt Wang told my mother that she was still afraid of being alone. She always feels lonely without company. My mother said she was worthless, and she was right, because Aunt Wang's husband was later dumped by mistress, and then he actually wanted to return to his family.
Aunt Wang accepted him completely, which really shocked all of us. Do you choose to be with people who consume you because you are afraid of loneliness? But aunt Wang obviously doesn't understand this truth. She is very happy about her husband's return. She feels that the family is together again.
I heard that Aunt Wang's husband is sick all over now. Aunt Wang either accompanies her husband to see a doctor or takes care of her sick husband at home every day. My husband seemed to have a sudden cerebral thrombosis a few days ago. Fortunately, the rescue was timely and cured, but my hands and feet were a little clumsy. Aunt Wang now drinks tea for her husband at the bedside every day and has lost several laps.
"Young couples always come together." If your husband is kind to you when he is young, it's okay for them to help each other in their later years, but aunt Wang is obviously not the case. It is said that this man still often yells at Aunt Wang now, and he doesn't feel sorry for her after the reunification, so it is really hard to understand that Aunt Wang has to bear such a burden in order not to be lonely.
Don't be too afraid of loneliness when you get old. Sometimes loneliness is a gift of life. When you can enjoy it, you are truly strong and mature. If you are afraid of it, you can only be accompanied by pain.
02.children
Buddha said, "Husband and wife are predestined friends, but children are in debt. No chance to get together, no debt. " Among them, Mei Niang feels the same way about the saying that "children are debts".
Because you raise your sons and daughters, you do your best to raise them, and you don't know which one of them will become a talent in the end. Even some children may not even become adults, and eventually they will become a burden to you for life. If this is not a debt, what is it?
At this time, parents should be open-minded and don't continue to bear the burden of their children's lives after they grow up, because the more you bear, the less he can stand on his own feet, and then you may be dragged down.
This is the case in Li Nainai, my hometown. She became a widow early and endured hardships. She can't bear to eat or wear. She gave all the good things to her two children, and she was reluctant to buy a new dress from beginning to end, and finally brought them up.
But who knows, the child did not leave as she wished. My son went to junior high school, didn't study hard, and mixed with a group of bad elements in society. It is useless for Li Nainai to persuade him patiently. Finally, he became an adult and was willing to go to work, but he always fished for three days and dried his net for two days. He was often deducted from his salary for absenteeism and almost got fired. He worried Li Nainai a lot.
The girl got good grades and finally went to the health school. But after graduation, she fell in love with a young man from other places. She was carried away by love, but she didn't listen to persuasion and had to marry not far away. Aunt Wang forced her to death, and she didn't change her mind about marrying far away. Alas, this girl can't count on it.
So since the children may not be expected, Li Nainai must leave some personal money in her own hands, but Li Nainai doesn't think so. She thinks children are more difficult to get along with than she is.
Her retirement salary is not much, but she is frugal. All she has to do is round up a whole number, either to raise a son or to support her daughter, and she never has any money left in her hand.
It was not until later that she was ill and hospitalized that she found herself short of money. My son did come, but he didn't have a penny. My daughter just brought some fruit. She has no money. Finally, a relative who was a doctor in Li Nainai helped her raise money, which was a great blow to her.
Lying in a hospital bed, Li Nainai finally understood that children can still count on it? It's good to count on it. If you can't count on it, you must rely on yourself. A clinical aunt also told her not to worry so much. Children and grandchildren have their own children and grandchildren. You have to have two dollars in your hand in order to have a good old age. Li Nainai figured it out. In the future, she will save money for the elderly and can no longer subsidize her children.
When people get old, they all want to have a filial child who can do filial piety for themselves, but the reality is that many young people are grateful that they are not old. So, stop thinking about their lives and don't let them become your weakness. You should have let go a long time ago As the saying goes, "If you love deeply, you can let go". You should be willing to let the person you love suffer.
From a long-term perspective, children have hands and feet. Let them run in by themselves, so that they will know how to stand on their own feet and understand your hard work better. You should think more about yourself, because there are no children, at least you have money in your hand, so you can prepare for your old age.
03. body
As the saying goes, good health is a blessing for old people. Health is the capital of the body, and the most precious thing in a person's life is health. Health is the source of happiness and the foundation of life. Although health can't replace everything, there is no meaning without health. If you want to be healthy physically and mentally, you must eat well and don't treat yourself badly.
My father and my mother are now helping me with my children and taking care of my brother's children at the same time. He stayed at my house at night, but the next morning he had to go to my brother's to send his children to kindergarten.
So, in the morning, he always takes two bites in a hurry and then waits for the bus. Then in the evening, after picking up the children, he took a few meals at my brother's and took care of my children with my mother. I always wanted him to have dinner with us, but he always said it was troublesome. So he has three meals a day, poor food and no nutrition, and then he runs around and is overworked for a long time. Not long after, his old problem of lumbar disc herniation recurred, and then it never rains but it pours. That day, he suddenly had a fever.
Many diseases are cumulative, not overnight. Old people don't have to eat too greasy, but they can't eat without nutrition. It's hard enough running around. They can't eat well. Can they not collapse? After this robbery, my father is willing to open his heart and drink a glass of milk every night. Of course, if you want to have a healthy body and mind, you must keep an optimistic mood and a positive attitude towards life.
My mother is much more open-minded than my father. She is good at living. She eats a little of all the fruits I buy during the day, and then goes out to dance in the square dance at night. When she sees any beautiful clothes, she takes them directly with her mobile phone and buys them for me. On her last birthday, she insisted that I give her a gold bracelet, and then she would show off all kinds of things when she went back to her hometown.
My dad says she is tacky, but I just think she has a good attitude and lives vigorously every day. As my mother used to say, "one day is missing when one is old." Of course, every day should be regarded as the last. " My mother's education level is not high, but I think she is a philosopher with life wisdom.
When you get old, your health will always be your weakness. So you must treat it well and protect its health and happiness, so that it is easier to maintain a strong body and be happier in your later years. In fact, each of us has our own weakness, and it is possible to crush you anytime and anywhere. Therefore, it is realistic and helpless to guard against these three weaknesses when you are old.
But when you do it, it will make your life better than those who don't pay attention, won't it? When you are old, it is often these three "soft spots" that make your old age miserable. Please remain vigilant.