In this paragraph, there is such a person, the last name of the smoke, called smoke addiction. The first thing you need to do is to get your hands dirty. He loved to smoke when he was a child, and stole his father's cigarettes when he was a child, so he got this name from childhood, and became addicted to smoking. When he got older, no one could control him, and he could smoke five or six packs of cigarettes a day. He not only smokes, he also has a crooked son. How to say:? Two packs of cigarettes in the morning, the spirit of your day, two packs of cigarettes at noon, free and happy, two packs of cigarettes at night, more than the living God. You say he is not bad luck?
One day, the city where this addiction lives became a smoke-free city, and all of them were not allowed to smoke, which made the addiction anxious! The first thing you need to do is to get your hands on a new one, and you'll be able to do it. (Acting, with facial expressions) Oh! Well, we don't live here anymore, we move to another place, prepared dozens of sacks of cigarettes, built a small house on the desert, and smoked as much as we liked there. No one else knows about it! From a distance, there was only a yellow smoke. Yoo-hoo! What's the meaning of this? Why is there yellow smoke in the desert? I didn't know he was smoking. But this is not long, not a few months ah the whole country has become a smoke-free country, there is no choice but to take the boat to go abroad to smoke to go. He sat on the boat to see from afar that really? Lonely sails far away from the blue sky, only to see the cigarette a little red? Well, so he got himself into a foreign country. Smoking in foreign countries is less than two years of work, the World Health Organization announced that the Earth has become a smoke-free world. You see this inch of strength, you can not see him on the tobacco addiction suffocation is not it? The first thing you need to do is to get your hands on a new pair of shoes or boots.
So he went up to the sky to smoke! He lived in the moon for 16 years ah, there is such a day family to pick him back, back to see this is snow white hair snow white beard ah! When he came down, he was carrying a sack of cigarettes. Someone asked him:? How do you say how to carry cigarettes ah? Then look at this one, with tears in his eyes, tears in his eyes, his mouth trembled and said four words: ? I did not bring fire?
篇二：钟山风情单口相相情 台词
玉免刚走，金龙来临。 The first year is the beginning of the year, and everything is renewed. In order to make everyone happy, I'm going to improvise a monologue. I am Chen Yongming from Wangzhen. I'll tell you a little bit about Zhongshan. Want to live in Zhongshan, advise you to look at the Jin Yongfu's "Liangdu Bin", to trace the roots, look at the Wu Xueliang's "Say it, homes", to understand the scenery of Zhongshan, read Shi Yu's "Phoenix Dance Lotus". Standing in the middle of the stage of the District Convention Center, to be honest I'm still a little nervous. Applause want up. I understand more in my heart, must say that Ha's love for Zhongshan does not change, more love for this home!
Yesterday, the God of Heaven descended to understand the people's situation. First went to Washington's high-class bar, asked Levinsky, who was drinking, you know the world's largest aircraft carrier there. How many people are there and what are their uses? Lewinschki replied, is the United States? Nimitz? Nimitz, built in 1975, 332 meters long, 42 meters wide, can park more than 80 aircraft, there are 6,000 people, want to hit that country to hit that country. If you don't believe me, ask Brother Bama.
The God of Heaven and came to Tsinghua University in Beijing, asked Zhu Rongji, who is playing the right of Taiji, he said the largest aircraft carrier in ? The cool capital of Liupanshui? s Zhongshan District, Shui Cheng dam as a boat, the stern in the Meihua Mountain, the bow in the Eagle Mountain. Built in March 1988, with a total area of 484, 84 square kilometers, there are 31 nationalities, 60, 68 million people. There are 13,400 million tons of coal and 450,000 tons of lead and zinc. Our use is people do not offend me, I do not offend, our theme is one is development, two is peace.
Said Zhongshan Road Zhongshan, Zhongshan origin is not ordinary. A pair of Ling is very fierce, fell in the city of water into the bell, on the bell on the bell, yellow earth in the middle, who knows to break, amazing a great work. ***The third line of construction is very good, and the nitrate cave is very famous. 200,000 years ago, there were people. Zhongshan aircraft carrier five rooms, the lower part of the four-wheel drive, five rooms are the German Office, the Yellow Office, the Phoenix Office, the Lotus Office and the moonlight. People's Road, Zhongshan Road. Liangdu Road.? Three vertical and twelve horizontal? Houses like woods. Four wheels are Dawan, Wang Jiazhai, Dahe and Eagle Hill. The big bay has a sea pin leek ping, half into the sky floating colorful clouds. Wang Jia Zhai is a sea of coal, Western Electricity East Guangdong to buy. Listen to the old man pendulum, the town of Dahe has an Eler River, melons and fruits floating incense without saying, the mountain Ma Long crotch is the history of the ancient Tun, hidden above the tomb of Princess Yelang. Yuezhao is the township of a thousand holes, the township of caves, that is the nearest place to Chang'e.
The stern has Longdi Reservoir, Dewu Reservoir, Yaoshang Reservoir. The carrier travels 80,000 miles a day and has plenty of energy and water. The German office white cranes fly, fly to the water fairy slope to see the monument to the People's Heroes, Baiyunshanzhuang good place, Lingshan Temple in a good incense burning, a street to sell sheep soup, Phoenix New District good scenery. All the people are motivated to inspire, five fingers down the hill is the government, Secretary Wei Shuwang, command carrier general direction, the district mayor is Liang Jian, the indicators are realized, for the country, for the people, Zhongshan District, the province ranked fifth.
Said Zhongshan Road Zhongshan, Geopark is not ordinary, the city has a mountain, the mountain has a hole, hole in the water, the south side of Maanshan, Tianmu Mountain and other seventy-two sitting in the mountain, is simply the world's wonders. Fengchi play chess, the whole blessed branding pot is one of the best in the world. The country has money. Pets fed in Qingbi Park. Ming Lake Wetland is worth mentioning, People's Square has a pen, the contents of the above Zhongshan situation all say Qi, S is the top of Wumeng, coal, steel, electricity and materials leading the province. In order for the people to be happier, is now the whole party to grasp the economy, focus on industry, the first to build parks, the core to grasp the investment, breakthroughs in the project. The construction of the new Hongqiao District is on fire.
Now Zhongshan shall not be, hometown became beautiful, building more, reading free, cultural improvement, food loaded, meals can be fragrant, cooperative medical care, the Internet installed, informed, rich road to wealth, rich entertainment, beautiful clothes, talk happy, increased income, the days of red-hot, into the city with a car, the road is wide and smooth, easy to buy and sell, commodities are complete, the city has a car, roads, easy to buy and sell, commodities are complete. The company's website has been updated with the latest information on the company's website.
The Party's leadership to play the front, scientific development has a head start, the New Year's Day drum drum head, well-off life have hope, harmonious Huaxia taste sweet, charming Zhongshan have a look, unlimited excitement in the back. If you are healthy, happy and joyful, give us a round of applause! (Thank you)
篇三：单口 相声台词
Hello students, my name is **, today I come to give you a monologue.
Comedy is a language art, speaking, learning, teasing, singing;
And then a paragraph upside down song? Morning exercises after dusk, see the mouse to catch a cat, the dog eats grass, the horse long horns, scared of the bench running all over the street, eat milk, drink bread, carrying a car on the schoolbag, you say upside down not upside down? This is not too much fun, say another paragraph of fresh, called? I'm not going to be able to do that. It is to recite the words that I have learned in a row, starting with ? Open number one, three, five, seven, nine, two, four, six, eight, ten, clap your hands, first of all, the cat looking for the white rabbit, the two brothers clattered to water the trees, look down and bend over, eat grass in order to grow fat, marking the direction of the future, drive hooves expedition to reclaim the wilderness, the tadpole without legs, frog swim practice, toad stretching his tongue to scurry a line, the restriction of naughty and naughty not to stop, always wanting to jump and jump not in the right form, the behavior of the vigilant, don't laugh at the stupidity of the labor force cleverly after school to do their duty and love the services of the work, the work of each line are in contact with the disposal of the problem, don't be discouraged, lazy, more than a little bit of contact. The problem don't be discouraged, lazy and doubtful accumulation of regret, waving welcome Jinxiu ten thousand years long, yellow corn rows of gold stacks, the autumn harvest cut rice sickle flicker, masters waving the brush Yan Ling erase, chapter ink painting scroll wrapped, juice boring shallow cups, swim in the sea of wisdom joyful ocean Ying?
Amusing and learning have been interspersed in the above performances, the next should be sung, first of all, a pop song, the knife Lang's?The first snow of 2002, came a little later than in previous times. Stopped at the eighth floor of the two-way car, took away the last piece of falling yellow leaves.
The first snow in 2002, came a little later than usual, you like a butterfly flying around, swaying in the snowy season. You're like a butterfly flying around, swaying in the snowy season. And then a familiar children's song "Nezha" theme song,
? To tell a piece of myth, it is said that such a family, this husband and wife, gave birth to a strange doll ? What is his name, Nezha, Nezha, Nezha, Little Nezha?
I've finished my performance, I wish you all a good new year, thank you!