Mr. Xia, hello. I and my husband married more than 1 year, in accordance with the previously discussed, my mother took over to live together. Living together is less than half a year, my mother-in-law because she went out to square dance back, found that by 10:00 pm, no one to wash the dishes angry! On the surface, she was scolding her son, but my mom and I knew she was scolding us. Usually the dishes are collected by my mother-in-law, so that day my husband collected the dishes and put them in the sink. My mom was so angry that she packed up her things and was about to leave. It was too late, so I left her behind.
The next day, my mother-in-law was not angry, but also helped me and my husband to persuade my mother not to go back. My mother's health is not good, after my father died has been I take care of her, my husband and I talked about a few years before, my mother does not want us to be together, said to marry too far away! In fact, I know, she is afraid of losing me this only dependence.
In order to convince my mom, my husband and I discussed, after the marriage also let her live over. The first thing I did was to ask my mother to give me a chance to get married, and then I was asked to give her a chance to get married. They often secretly fight, once my mother went to the bathroom, forget to flush the toilet, my mother-in-law a hard to say that the home stinks of death, hard to scold my mother in front of me unkempt, angry my mother did not get up a day.
I know that my mother-in-law wants to drive my mother back, when I bought a wedding house with my husband, I paid half of the money, so I took my mother over to live. I'm not sure how much I'm going to be able to get out of this, but I think I'm going to be able to get out of this, and I think I'm going to be able to get out of this, and I think I'm going to be able to get out of this. My father-in-law often doesn't speak, and he goes out when they argue. My husband and I can't say anything to anyone. Now, my mother-in-law thinks my mom is too lazy to do anything. In fact, it is my mother can not do, she is very fat, blood pressure and high, there are two times just to help me wash a clothes, are inexplicable cerebral hemorrhage, sent to the hospital.
My mother's cooking, my mother-in-law is not too spicy or too salty, my mother-in-law to do the meal, my mother feels too light, can not eat rice, so every time they do pickles, do pickles, my husband loves to eat, my mother-in-law feel that the food is not nutritious, and do not allow my husband to eat ...... I now feel that the family is divided into two factions, so depressing, I don't want to go home every day. I don't want to go home every day!
Now I don't know what to do, if I let my mom go back to the countryside, I really don't feel comfortable, she is now in this body, on the third floor, she can't climb up, gasping for air. If she goes back, no one will take care of her, not to mention that I was the one who brought her here, and I don't want my relatives to say that I drove my mom back! Mr. Xia, what should I do, my husband and I are caught in the middle, it's very difficult, please give us some ideas, I look forward to replying. I agree with the public posting.
Xia Mo replied:
Chinese-style marriage, marrying is equal to marrying a family. The original mother-in-law-daughter-in-law relationship is complicated at the root of the problem. And you, in turn, married with your mother, which is equal to blending the two families together, even more difficult to get along. On the one hand, filial piety, on the other hand, family, so what to do?
First, discuss with your husband, keep a united front
The relationship between mother-in-law and daughter-in-law is not compatible, or your husband and your mother can not get along with each other, or your mother and your mother-in-law can not get along with each other, it can directly affect your marriage, so in this case, you first need to communicate more, to keep standing on a united front.
Second, looking for a savior
Obviously, your mother and mother-in-law quarrel, your father-in-law always go out, that he also do not want to go deeper into it, and may be on this behavior also look bad. You and your husband, you can secretly, more and father-in-law communication, encounter conflicts, you can let him more and your mother-in-law to do ideological work.
Third, you and your mother-in-law living apart
Only distance can produce beauty, so now can only be separated, you and your mother-in-law living apart, in-laws live a piece of a care, if your mother can not take care of their own lives, your husband and wife with your mother to live a piece of a, but also each other to have a care.
Four, or separate to your mother to rent a small single room
In the same neighborhood, often meet, chat, not let your mother lonely, but also can pull your mother and your mother-in-law distance between. When it's okay, take her out for a walk or go for a walk, so she doesn't feel left out.
Fifth, please your mother-in-law
In this case, do not blame your mother-in-law, do not confront her. Talk to your mother-in-law more, communicate with her more, and don't let her feel that you are favoring your mother in everything. Help your mother to prepare some small gifts to your mother-in-law on New Year's Day, the more gifts, the more polite, the easier it is to stop the conflict.