Talking about topics like this can easily be dismissed as someone with a deep hatred in this area. So let's make a disclaimer. Like almost all of my male compatriots, I'm not satisfied that my favorite women don't want to hang themselves on my tree, so I have both bitterness and hatred, but neither bitterness nor hatred is so great or deep that I can criticize women here. I'm only talking about this topic out of interest in the psychological phenomenon of human sexual relations, not out of personal vendetta.
When I was in college I was chatting with a few of my closest friends, and we talked about a few other friends of the same sex that we had met together. A large, but very artistic male classmate said in all seriousness that if I were a woman, I'd have to marry a few guys and regret it for the rest of my life if I didn't. Then I made a long list of names. Those men were of varying beauty and personality, but one thing was ****ing the same, they were all very interesting people. Depending on how attractive each one was to him, the length of time he wanted to marry them varied from three months to a year. We laughed so hard our jaw joints dislocated listening to his whimsical ideas. At the same time, we imagined how many men I would marry if I were a woman. On second thought, the number was no more than ten.
Occasionally, I see a lot of Jane Doe, some country, marriages in newspaper flashes, but no woman I know around me has done so. There are very few who have been married three times. It goes to show that while our fellow women are just as much dudes as their male counterparts, they also know how to behave appropriately.
Men can be narcissistic because of this, as this example shows that the different loveliness of different men leads to the easy virtue of women. With the advancement of time, the phrase "there are too many temptations in the world" is no longer just a warning to men. However, I still find it strange when women use this phrase to remind themselves or other women, like hearing a plate of delicious food say she cares who gets to taste it. I know it has something to do with my inner macho, which is characterized by ignoring or denying women's basic needs and believing that women have no active choices, only passive obedience.
Limiting women's rights
Let's continue with the food analogy. The question of whether a man is too cute or a woman is too dandy is followed by the question of whether the food is too good or the diner is too good (the first "good" is an adverb, pronounced in the third tone; the second "good" is a verb, and it's a matter of rank. Sooner or later, if the comparison continues, it will come down to the question of whether the chicken or the egg came first. The good thing is that we all have a standard answer to these kinds of questions, which is that they are causal and complementary to each other, and there is no order at all.
Nietzsche said that the only goodness that nature has shown in the creation of man is in the relationship between man and woman, where each man and woman can satisfy their own needs and yet bring benefit to the other. Brilliant words, including insights and affirmations about women's needs, and a far cry from the demeaning things he once said about women. But some men who don't understand women's needs may think that a man-woman relationship is one in which the man bullies the woman. If a woman initiates sex with a man in such a situation, there is something wrong with that woman. Such a man would hate a woman who takes too much initiative, but we know that this nasty feeling is the result of his own narrow-mindedness and ignorance. Unfortunately, women of the olden times, or some modern women with outdated views, would subscribe to this idea. The fear of "losing" in a relationship with a man, or the belief that some normal giving is losing, is such a false view. As a direct result, they limit their right and ability to pursue happiness and suffer excessively in their relationships with men and women.
"Hunan women are very affectionate" is an old saying. I went to high school in Hunan and have dealt with some Hunan girls since I started working there. I don't think it's a lie. I remember once went to Hunan to participate in an academic conference. Before leaving, a few girls from Hunan who had known me for only two days had to send me to the station and helped me with my luggage, making my parting feelings both direct and measured. That scene still warms my heart when I think of it now. I would never think that they did this because they were personally "interested" in me. My sense is that their basic attitude toward people, that is, their concern, care and interest in others, especially men, is characterized by femininity. If that's what it means to be feminine, then I hope there are as many feminine women as possible. If every woman was just gentle and smiling to her regular partner, and every other man was cold-faced and frosty, then the world would be a really cold place.
Depressed men like chastity.
In my bones, men still like watery women. Men are narcissistic creatures and they like women who are interested in them. On the surface, men are always looking for women they like, but in reality, they need more women who are interested in them. Watery women have a basic interest in all men, which is an irresistible charm for men.
There are also men who don't like watery women, but I'm sure at least some (not all, of course) repress their desires. Because the attractiveness of such a woman induces desires in him that he himself does not allow himself to have, he is averse to distancing himself from them. Such psychological problems can also manifest themselves in other aspects of his life, for example, he may give the impression that he is a man who does not love life; you can be harsh on yourself and others in your relationships.
Men don't begrudge their money, nor do they begrudge the praise of women who are not at all prone to virtue, as the chastity monument and the words on it attest. However, men do not begrudge money and praise to women who are "very good at what they do". At one time, it can be said with certainty that the money spent on the so-called "Golden Cave", as well as the gorgeous words dedicated to geisha and courtesans, were much more than the cost of erecting the monument and the inscription. Men are such contradictory and hypocritical creatures, and both the watery and the watery are sustaining them. From a woman's perspective, things are difficult. I really don't know what kind of woman I have to be to make men happy. No wonder women complain that it's hard to be a woman.
Objectively speaking, "very good" women have made an incomparable contribution to the development of Chinese culture. If a Chinese man can recite a few poems by heart, perhaps one of them was dedicated by a poet or lyricist to a woman he knew to be "easy-going". It is inconceivable that if every woman had the right to erect a house of chastity, there would still be such a brilliant splash of color in Chinese culture. A poet's talent needs to be cultivated through relationships with women. Of course, we are not advocating here that women should be more prone to virtue, thus producing more talented poets and more Romantic poems for China.
A redoubt says men shirk their responsibilities.
For thousands of years, countless wars have been fought over women. When men reflect on themselves, they often attribute the cause of the wars to the watery nature of women. On the surface there is some truth to this, for if it were in a woman's nature to be a martyr, then all the men in the world would have broken the hearts and minds of other men's wives or lovers, and the wars would never have begun. But deep down, the red herring argument really doesn't make sense. If a man isn't dabbling in women to the point of sickness, how can he start a war to steal them? If a society is dominated by women, there will likely be a war for men. At this point, women might call the man "the blue-faced scourge". But in fact, such a small "war" does occur. In a polygamous society, the fights between wives and concubines were for men. But no woman ever thought that men were the nemesis of fighting. In this sense, women are more courageous than men.
Yin and Yang are the most basic components of this world, and men and women are the basic elements of human society. Under the same blue sky, yin and yang attract each other, and men and women are the most natural thing in the world. Otherwise it is abnormal. Of course, any relationship has to follow certain rules. Rules are supposed to serve the happiness of human beings, but unfortunately, human beings tend to value rules more than themselves, which directly harms their happiness and kills humanity.
The inner world and the outer world are vastly different and sometimes even incompatible. It is impossible for a person to have all her inner desires realized. In dealing with the relationship between one's inner and outer worlds, there is a basic principle that one can do whatever one's inner heart desires without causing too much actual trouble. An extreme example would be if you want to rob a bank in your heart. If you do, there will be severe punishment waiting for you. It is not cost-effective in any way. The same is true for relationships between men and women. A woman can have hundreds of thoughts and feelings in her heart, but if she marries one of the many men mentioned earlier, at today's market prices, just moving and taking wedding pictures would be enough to exhaust her and ruin her family. If health and food and shelter are a problem, then it's just a matter of watching other women continue to have sex on an imaginary level.