my family enrolled me in a cram school in order to get me into a key high school. I didn't expect to meet someone who made my eyes shine here.
She is my make-up teacher.
The night in early summer is a bit stuffy, but under the stir of the breeze, the chill falls from the sky in waves.
after self-study in the evening.
I stood at the door of the classroom of the make-up school and waited for the teacher.
just then.
A figure in a small black suit came up to me, holding a lesson plan in his hand, with a tall and straight body, flowing long hair, charming face and pure and clean breath, like an elf who broke into the world.
after looking at each other, she nodded and walked towards another classroom.
after she left, the fragrance got into my nostrils. I greedily sucked in the fragrance that fascinated me, and I was tender all over, staring at her back for a long time.
from the moment she came, I was already looking forward to the distance.
She inadvertently broke into a girl's heart, and the girl secretly planted a acacia bean for her, which grew into a towering tree and blossomed a love flower just for her.
I fell in love with seed of love at her age.
I occasionally catch a glimpse of the inner lily, which is like being enchanted and wrapped in a hot and restless heart. Every day, every night, I just want to pick a delicate and fresh flower for her.
I can satisfy her eyes, her smile and her fragrance for a long time.
The most anticipated thing every day is to go to the cram school early.
At that time, she was not my one-on-one teacher, but I gave her all my joy and fell in love with her hopelessly.
Later, I was admitted to a key high school, and she became my one-on-one make-up teacher.
whenever she answers my doubts, I will hold my breath and let her gentle and long voice pass through my skin and fall into my heart. Her breath is like the soft wind in the early summer night, which stirs my heart.
Like an unscrupulous recluse, I set my eyes on her hair tips, lips, fingers and even buttons on my chest.
Inadvertent eye contact, I fell into her black eyes again.
she probably felt my fiery eyes shooting at her like bullets, and with a smile on her mouth, she tapped on the table gently to make me pay attention to the lecture.
whenever this happens.
The hot air in the body will pounce on the tender face, and even the air will become hot. The sunset outside the window will crush all my thoughts in its arms, and the warm afterglow will fall on the teacher, the table and our laughter.
High school life is extremely boring, and she has become my expectation day after day.
Every time after class, she will take me to eat a lot of snacks, go to places I have never been to, follow behind her and be held by her hand. I become her most special child.
She treats me like a child, and I treat her like a lover. She never knows that the light in my eyes is only because of her.
? 2?
A year later, she returned to her hometown to develop. I miss her more and more, but I can only greet her from the perspective of friends, teachers and students.
Slowly, our chat became more and more ambiguous. I missed you for a long time, and the teacher can finally say it.
In the second year of senior high school, it was a normal winter, and the night hung over my head like a miss. I had an argument with my teacher, and she was impatient. I was wronged and became a child, holding back my tears.
I uttered the sentence uncontrollably with my hands, "You don't know that I like you!"
Outside the classroom, a high-pitched cold wind got into the classroom, and the glass shook like someone shook it.
I was awakened by my own impulse, and my heartbeat was as loud as someone beating a drum in my ear. I was red in the face, looking forward to it, but I was scared.
I heard an unexpected answer with a tentative heart.
The teacher said, "She knows!"
Since then, our chat has become more ambiguous, even like lovers, but no one has poked the paper.
I'm looking forward to graduation, growing up, and the future with her.
And she has failed my expectations again and again. As long as we have an argument, she can give me the cold shoulder like a stranger.
no matter what I say, she will only say "hmm" and even won't return my message for several days.
Her indifference shot down all my expectations. I was worried about her like a crazy person who was thinking, afraid that she would have an accident, that she would be sad, and that she had something to hide.
Maybe, the age difference of 9 years has already doomed her to be my inevitable robbery. Even if she is premeditated cold violence, I am willing to be abused by her.
I have never asked, what is our relationship?
I'm afraid of getting an answer that hurts my heart.
I will cry all night because I am wronged, and I will lose sleep in the middle of the night because I miss her. When I look at the sweater she gave me in the closet, I laugh like a fool.
I feel sick, like a clown who plays a love drama on his own stage alone, reveling in her reply to me a few more words.
In the third year of senior high school, because of the operation, some nerves were cut off, and many anesthetics, hormones and nutrition injections were given, the brain became less functional than before, and the whole person began to be decadent, and he became a loafer in the Qingbei class with the idea of repeating studies.
in the college entrance examination, I went through a formality. On the night of the grade, I told my teacher that I was going to repeat it, and she cried.
The days of repeating classes are still as dull as water. Fortunately, there is no pain. However, when the epidemic appeared, I had to take classes online at home, and my grades soared. The class teacher sent a message to ask my mother if I cheated.
when I rushed to 985,211, I broke my bone on July 1st, and my heart felt like ashes.
The bright future I was looking forward to collapsed, complaining about the injustice of fate. Why do you torture me like this every time? Haven't you suffered enough?
fortunately, with the encouragement and comfort of the teacher, I failed the college entrance examination on July 7, but I still got mixed up as an undergraduate.
In the summer vacation of 22, I encountered the longest cold violence. For half a month, the teacher didn't say a word.
I am like an ant on hot bricks, anxiously waiting for her reply. When I lie in bed, I will relive our chat records over and over again and look at the dynamics of her circle of friends.
finally, she replied with a word "hmm".
This word is like a bomb, which shattered all my worries and anxieties. My empty heart finally landed. As long as she is fine, I don't care how sad I am.
I asked, is it impossible for us?
she said, ordinary friends are good!
I said, you must ask me to be the maid of honor when you get married in the future!
she said, ok!
Finally, my heart was hollowed out, even my breath was cold, and a series of tears flowed down my sad face. I lay prone on the bed, twitching all over, biting my quilt horn, and crying silently drained the only thoughts left in my soul.
? 3?
College life has begun, and my love for my teacher is still hidden in my heart. After all, she was the light in my eyes.
In November, I met a girlfriend online, who was a T. After we confirmed our relationship, I wrote a farewell letter to my teacher.
the content of the letter is so long that I thought it would never end.
But before the teacher finished reading it, she said she was sorry. I comforted her panic like a calm old man.
she asked if I was going to abandon her!
I said, you abandoned me!
She kept saying she was sorry and asked me what I needed, and she would give it to me. I said it was unnecessary!
she asked, why did my heart suddenly become so hard?
I don't know why, but I suddenly let it go.
Maybe I held on too tightly in the past, maybe I knew there was no result, maybe my love never got a response, and my heart fell to the bottom, so it was hard to love crazily.
I cried, and the teacher's reply was intermittent, but it always showed that the other person was typing ...
I deleted her cruelly!
I'm not as happy as I thought when I was with T. It's more about three minutes of heat. She can't forget her predecessor, and I still miss my teacher.
There is an unforgettable person in my heart. Being with her is doomed to be unhappy, only endless quarrels and cold violence.
after half a year, I broke up with T and joined the teacher again.
The teacher is as happy as a child. She often greets me, cares about me and tells me about her past. Sometimes the voice call can last for hours. She says that everything I need will satisfy me.
There was no mention of love in our conversation, but I felt surrounded by love, and I returned to the satisfaction of junior high school.
only this time, I have grown up!
later, I learned how much she loves me, but the age gap has made her give up all thoughts.
She doesn't like cold violence. She just wants me to take the initiative to retreat by not replying.
when I really let go and found a girlfriend, she found that her life had already been occupied by me.
during the time when I disappeared, she often listened to the stories I recorded for her before, laughing, crying and shouting my name over and over again.
She will often browse my circle of friends, qq space and even Tik Tok Zhihu, and go to Netease Cloud to browse our chat records.
while she was denouncing her own heartlessness, she was looking forward to my return.
I didn't know how happy I was until I came back to her. No matter how busy I was, she would reply immediately after seeing the news, and she would take everything I said to heart. If she was unhappy, she would immediately coax me.
I began to understand all my hobbies, and I was carefully held in her hand, becoming happier and happier.
on may 19th last year.
I hinted that she said, I want to be your girlfriend, the only one hidden in my heart.
I received flowers from my teacher on May 2th.
from then on, we began to show our love to each other crazily.
I don't have to hide the words I love you anymore.
I love you when I open my eyes, and I love her all day, and I love you before I go to bed, and she loves me all night.
In those years, I didn't love enough. In the future, I must love enough.
teacher, you don't know, it feels good to be able to love you openly.
It is said that people who are moved at the first sight will still fall after seeing you again. My love for you began at the first sight six years ago.
Now, although we will quarrel, the teacher will be patient and coax me. We will give each other gifts that we like, and we will record our beauty in every special festival.
since I changed my name, my name has included her name, which is my intentional romance and my most special love for her.
Every day, I am studying hard, and she is working hard. Even if the future is uncertain, the future can still be expected, because we have planned each other into each other's world!
Finally, I still want to say, teacher, thank you for your tolerance and accommodation. I will tighten your hand in the future and never let go.
I love you every day!