Winter 2011
Tomorrow, New Year's Eve, unconscious, there seems to be the sound of firecrackers, perhaps just a hallucination, Dongguan will also have the sound of firecrackers? It's raining again, small as a mist, but a little bit of ice, I tilted my face, the night is as cool as water!
Walked through the door of a closed store, "empty city" lonesome quiet invasion of the eyes, wet knocking damp hair, often go to eat "Sha Xian Snacks" store, the door is clearly written on red paper: go home to celebrate the New Year, suspended operations! The happy faces of the family seemed to be floating in these two short lines, envying people. I smiled bitterly, looking for a meal that can fill the stomach, a moment actually do not know where to go, stood frozen in the street, and finally returned to the residence with a cell phone full of blessing messages.
A box of noodles, alone in the light of tears swallowed, I think, in Dongguan, most of the outsiders have had such an experience, and even this is just a trivial episode of life. After all, salty has a salty taste, we wander just to be able to not wander, this road south is destined to start and end.
(I)
"To feel alone in the world, cut off from all contact, unpredictable in reaching one's destination, and full of obstacles in returning to the same place, is a very peculiar mood for an inexperienced young man. The charm of adventure makes this mood beautiful, the joy of pride makes it hot, but then the tremor of fear makes it unsettling".
I looked back at the empty dormitory, one hand suitcase, one hand clothing bag, dragged four floors, to the meeting point of the school lake, the school is quiet, it is the holidays, graduation has left, the vacation is at home cool Zinzheng dream, internships are running around looking for internship sites. A month ago in the bright afternoon, solemnly signed my name on the paper "Dongguan", followed by an explanation with my family, and then all the small objects replaced with new ones, including the pendant around the neck and hairstyle, along with the mood to pack in a new backpack, signaling my eagerness for a "fresh start! "I'm not going to be able to do that, but I'm going to be able to do it.
After the teacher's roll call was completed, I drilled into the bus and found a window seat, searching for, there are still a few familiar faces, two cars carrying two cars with different moods of people driving to the train station. Dormitory girlfriend picked up the gap to catch a few stops to send me, the results of the car will be traveling, a north door, a south door, Baba missed. I held up the two hamburgers bought for me by Xiaoyu and looked around the line, smiled at him outside the fence, and without looking back, I surged down the crowd toward the ticket gate.
After some physical struggle, both feet stepped on the southbound train, all the mood is temporarily replaced by fatigue, in the peak of the southbound laborers, was not kicked into the train by the stewardesses, but rather "squeezed" in and have a seat, you can burn incense to thank you, the whole car dense wall of people, standing people only face up to breathe the space. The whole car dense wall of people, standing people only face up to breathe space. To be a car traveling a period of time, the flow of people calm, there is a certain amount of space, the companion of a few journalism classmates face to reveal the anger, began to flirt and joke, call and send a text message to report safety, as if to do is a great thing! What lies ahead, who does not know, but, the only way to go out to make my restless heart in the non-stop running around to be calm.
(2)
The master said: we are an appendix in Dongguan, at any time will be cut off and fed to the dogs.
I said, I'm not an appendix, I'm a passerby!
Perhaps it is this "passer-by" mentality, so that I face all kinds of unexpected relief, because there will always meditate: I do not belong to here, so do not have to mind. So this has become my fatal weakness, more and more will isolate themselves in the world, become a mute, can bear to endure, can not endure the destruction of the broken pot.
At the beginning, the master from the base of the recruitment of me back (when I tilted my face, told him I can go to start from the bottom, after a month if he is not satisfied with me to go, satisfied with me to stay), all the way he chewed betel nut, full of betel nut flavor, I do not hate, he handed me a said: taste, write the program people to eat betel nut. I clutched it in my hand all the way, full of expectations for the cultural communication company I was going to! The car traveled more than two hours to the company's location, the master will take me to a rental building, help me pay for a day's accommodation, 30 dollars, and then told me that some of my colleagues also live in this side of the convenience of each other to take care of me will be happy to pick up the things to stay in the "small dark room", and he did not have too much to ask for, only that there is a place to settle down is enough to be poetic! The building outside the window said to himself, the sky for the cover, the ground for the bed, big enough, big enough. I put betel nut into the mouth, did not imagine delicious, face hot, throat stalking feel chest stuffy uncomfortable.
The landlord is a very generous people, all things are good to discuss, change a light, repair a line or something, just need to sincerely beg, he will be happy to help, so this "small dark room" to live down to the peace of mind. The first month like a miser with little left over from the family cobbled together the money, day after day calculating the number of payday, morning intestinal noodles, noon soup noodles, steamed rice noodles or instant noodles at night, ate a few days in a row, and then changed the lunch to fast food, and then really think that Luoyang's millet congee, eight treasures congee, spicy soup, tofu brain and so on, and so delicious! But downstairs in addition to the big restaurant, this is considered more homely. Three days on fire, every day loaded with a stomach of intestinal flour, top of the mouth on the big bubbles to work, learn some programs with the master, over and over again to write, over and over again to change, the master carefully, even punctuation are changed, I fell back on the strength of the red-faced muttering their own point of view, he was not angry, listen to me, and allow me to write, what I dare to write a pie-in-the-sky, the last to take the master of their own confirmed version of the program to self-humiliate a bit! The last master's own confirmed version of the program to shame themselves a bit, continue to skyrocket! Master is mostly in the afternoon to start working, leaving in the middle of the night, his morning from the beginning of the afternoon, so my off-duty time is also delayed with his morning, each time nearly off, he began to explain the program to me, pointing out the shortcomings. This day when I was leaving, he looked up at me and said: "Xiaoping ah! To drink herbal tea, to Dongguan to drink herbal tea"! I look back, master hair white white, and he lit up all night "San Mao" qq image, a lovely vicissitudes and fatigue. I began to patronize the "apricot spring", drink a cup of herbal tea, eat a plum, sweet.
In order to unite within the company, the master often called on us to get together, the first meal, everyone poured water into the cup, I picked up just to drink, but was stopped, the master took my chopsticks and cups of water into the bowl, chopsticks vertical inside, spoon ruffled the water, rinse after rinse, and the cups were inverted into the bowl, scalded by the scalded, and only then handed back to me. I bristled, fake clean it, the South is really sophisticated, dipped in the water will not have bacteria? However, when in Rome, everyone is serious about "dipping" before meals, I can't be exempted. Later learn to brew kung fu tea, master threw out a big bag of tea leaves, give me half a day, just sit down and brew tea, after brewing to colleagues to share the drink, not happy! Every time I ate dinner, the master would exclaim, "Xiao Ping, you're a child, you can't grow up!" I would rather fiddle with the dishes and turn them out one by one without saying a word than talk much, which gave Master a headache. But he is still willing to take me out to meet customers, talk about business, he let me talk about the program, I will speak, the rest of the time is he accompanied by people chatting with each other toasting, this time I will be mute, and then he saw the ineffectiveness of the words, but every time I eat still have a sentence: Xiaoping ah, children, not long!
From time to time, hanging a work card, wearing sneakers, slacks, wearing a duck-tongued cap, followed by the sea to the zoo, climbed up the wall to install advertising paintings, busy after the end of the stroll over and over again, look at the dolphins, followed by the road to walk with the elephants, lying outside the enclosure and the sunshine to say hello to the lions sleeping. Island Paradise" in Dongguan when shooting, we provide lion dance, everyone competing and Lin Xue photo, I was pulled to do the group, the director solemnly told me to pay attention to the importance of the importance of! Because the main actors are from me next to "walk past", I do not know later broadcast or not, I have not watched. I like to go out to do activities, finished squatting into a circle to eat fast food, full of chivalrous pride and sense of existence.
Later, I left my job. For the first time, the master said: do not rush to decide, give you a vacation, go out to play, take a break. Then, I walked by the Wanjiang Bridge for three days to go back to work. The last time, the master said: Well, go, also, to experience life. I then picked up my luggage to Qi Shi, slept, and early the next morning to Tangxia, began another journey.
(C)
Haigel once said: the poet's heaven is to return home, return home to make the native land become close to the origin.
The people outside the home as a kind of wandering end, that is a kind of almost faith guidance, longing for the clothes to return home, so there is always hope that exists, in the mind of the sentence: "wait for the day to go back to the ......," is the end of all the suffering. The first thing that you need to do is to get to the end of all the suffering. And colleagues and friends to discuss their hometown, never before used words of praise have become sincere and warm up, as if the mouth really said those historical stories, those places of interest that they know very well, in fact, do not see so familiar, and even those places that they have not been, but how can they not grow in a foreign country hometown of the wind! I want to go back to the ah!
My heart is on fire
Licking at my remaining sanity
I'm like a raging coyote
I want to break free from the rope around my neck
even if it's drenched in blood
Home
is undoubtedly the biggest temptation at the moment
It can be summed up as the hometown of
Luoyang
We are in the midst of the world's most famous city, Luoyang. --Luoyang
A candle
The trembling of your silhouette
This is the courage that I am left to breathe
The law of paradise
I have been walking, and when I'm alone I'm homesick, and I'm counting the people of Luoyang with pride, and I'm far away, but I am close. The first thing you need to do is to get a good deal of money and a good deal of money to pay for it. In fact, I do not hate the environment of the South, people from all over the world for the same dream from all directions, speaking Mandarin, after meeting only ask where they came from, do not ask about their origins, but in this city feel that they are their own masters, Dongguan with its unique big heart, accepting all kinds of people, although the outsiders are more known as the "new Guanman". "It's a great place to be. A person who has been in Dongguan for more than 20 years is still "new" in the eyes of an 8-year-old local child.
After changing jobs and learning to orient and think in an unfamiliar environment again, the leader said that the shoes did not meet the requirements, to black leather shoes! I'll just run my ass off to the following merchants to buy a pair of black leather shoes, afternoon work to stretch out the foot on one side, the leader passed by the satisfied nod; the leader said to the merchants on the phone with a smile, to sit upright, can not be no image, I swished the stool pulled into the service desk inside the rules of the rules, only showing the upper half of the body and a head, put out a big smile, with the square mandarin to urge the rent! The leader with a wig, ask you to see my long hair looks good or short hair looks good, I do not think about it said, short hair, dry, women in the heroine so, the result is that everyone said the leader long hair looks good, I snapped and said, long hair, gentle, it is okay! I still can't learn to speak, a dinner, the leadership let the toast, secretary director a whole lot, I weighed half a day or the director called the secretary, the secretary's face can't hang on, the director of the face not to my toast, don't pick up on it, just don't pick it up, I'll just eat by myself.
A group of coworkers often play after work, old and young in the bar, ktv hissing, a row of sieve cups, shaking the darkness of the sky. The company has a bar street, the street a Casa, the end of the street a Ujjaina Tibetan bar, small, very quiet, filled with a sandalwood flavor, occasionally there will be a yurt masters and children run in to sing "Phoenix Legend". A group of people, "play is crazy play, the heart is still snowy", the roadside snacks are very rich, eat each home to sleep, early to get up again is a stirring work of war! I often think back to that group of lovely people, each with a sharp mouth, but the same prodigal heart.
(d)
"A new enterprise, accompanied by his growth, and step by step to improve the system, is a different kind of sentiment, than the direct acceptance of the already existing mature system is more affectionate, and easier for people to comply with"
Yurt preparations, the various departments have been transferred to temporary assistance! Later camels, sheep, horses one after another from Mongolia, turf is also shipped, a yurt stood up, opening day, shopping plaza, shopping street, including the headquarters of the restaurant, went to cheer, we suits, draped in welcome strip, in the entrance to the rows of standing, my heart is proud and joyful, as if their own happy events in general, the wine offering Ovoo, carefully inserted the colorful flags in the cracks of the stone, with reverence for the heart to all creatures! The gods and goddesses prayed for peace! That night, I heard that the bonfire was so hot that half the sky was red. Back to Luoyang, one day, saw a colleague posted pictures, yurt fire, memory are twisted burned raw pain, do not go back, but know that it is there, and now a handful of ashes, it really tastes bad.
(v)
The end of summer, finally had the opportunity to the beach, and do not have to do the staff to organize merchants, luggage piled up, can not go into the water A water watched. Barefoot running to the beach, white cloak hunting, fine soft sand a grain of rubbing the palms of the feet, crispy. A few girls will not swim, especially the sea, each set of swimming circles, clumsy to go inside, we ring ring ring, male colleagues are responsible for the protection of "transportation" us, into the "scarf" word fixed articulation of Rex, left and right hand each pull a swimming circle, the waves to the front! We ran forward by pulling us in the swimming ring. I stared wide-eyed alert at all times, watching the rows of big waves hit over, learning from others to jump upward, was salty and bitter seawater backed up a few times will learn smart. When the sea was calm, I leaned back on my face and closed my eyes. Lying on the swimming ring, close your eyes, body floating at will, in this vast embrace, can enjoy a moment of peace.
Eat a buffet barbecue in the evening, smoke and fire full of barbecue flavor, walk to the beach, blowing the wind, at this time to see the sea is another state of mind, Xiaobai and a few colleagues where the waves, listening to the waves patting the sand, the world of mundane things can be thrown away, if you have a lifetime, with the hands of the son, strolling along the beach, picking up a conch, but also a wonderful thing in life, the north fly blowing away my dreams, I finally left. I'm not sure if I'm going to be able to do that, but I'm sure I'll be able to do it, and I'm sure I'll be able to do it.
Goodbye Dongguan! I'm not sure if I'm going to be able to do that!