1, learn to respect and understand
In dealing with mother-in-law-daughter-in-law relations, if a woman wants to develop good mother-in-law-daughter-in-law relations with her mother-in-law, it is necessary to learn to stand on each other's point of view to think about the problem, learn to understand each other, considerate of each other to understand each other to do so the reasons for the difficulties, so that nature is also natural and will not be, because of some of the things that are not to blame each other. The first thing you need to do is to understand each other and understand the reasons for each other's behavior. Not only do you need to put yourself in your wife's shoes for your mother-in-law, but your mother-in-law also needs to put herself in her shoes and stand on her daughter-in-law's point of view to think about the problem and understand each other. Because a lot of mother-in-law and daughter-in-law problems arise because of thinking, age difference is too big, or to the husband son's favor is caused.
2, learn to communicate with elders
Any problem has a reason, so the mother-in-law and daughter-in-law problems continue to aggravate the reason can be found, and find the cause of these problems is to know how to communicate with elders, as a daughter-in-law, to figure out the nature of the problem, to understand the reasons for the anger of the mother-in-law, if it is their own fault, they should take the initiative to their mother-in-law to admit their faults, if it is their own fault, they should take the initiative to the mother-in-law to admit their faults. If it is the mother-in-law's fault, do not be calculating, messing around, because different ages caused by the character and way of thinking is also different, so the view of things have some discrepancies is also understandable. There is no need to say clearly who is right and who is wrong in dealing with your mother-in-law, as long as you can solve the problem, it is complete. What to do when the relationship between mother-in-law and daughter-in-law is too bad? Follow me to see the solution about mother-in-law and daughter-in-law relationship is too bad.
The solution of too bad relationship between mother-in-law and daughter-in-law 1
1, from the beginning of small talk
and people are familiar with the communication from the beginning, to start from the beginning of small talk. In the topics you talk about with your mother-in-law, you can learn about the things she is interested in, get clear about her habits and values, and thus strengthen your understanding of her.
2. Standing in the same trench
Generally speaking, mothers-in-law are prone to see their daughters-in-law as "outsiders" and have a divide, so in order to make your mother-in-law accept you as soon as possible, you have to be "higher, faster and stronger" to instill in your mother-in-law! Some of the "soul soup", all-round to make her feel that you are even more than her own son to her. This is an important trick to get along with your mother-in-law and daughter-in-law, and it's not a bad idea.
Of course, this requires some high intelligence and a little big heart. You have to be determined to do any harmless problem is the mother-in-law reasonable, for example, firmly support the mother-in-law's nutrition program, determined not to let the rich mother-in-law to eat diet pills. As a result, you will create an atmosphere of closeness and togetherness that will make your mother-in-law feel that you are one of them.
3, acting "flesh play"
Don't get it wrong, not to you and your husband in front of your mother-in-law to show excessive intimacy, but on the contrary, this is a daughter-in-law should be the most taboo point! Here refers to the "meat play", refers to the mother-in-law in front of you to show your husband's love and care. For example, if you and your mother-in-law live together, you can with your husband in front of your mother-in-law to perform some drama, so that your mother-in-law knows that you are on her baby son is devoted, what is good to eat good with, you do not snatch with him; what at home and outside of the home, you grabbed to do. At this point, a little bit of meat, a little bit of exaggeration does not matter. The important thing is to let the mother-in-law's heart to be satisfied, you know, when the mother's are biased eyes, is to see how you hit the right spot!
4, appropriate to show weakness
In the old society, "many years of the daughter-in-law into a grandmother", the daughter-in-law suffered the mother-in-law's bullying, but now it's different, you are young and independent, her precious son was not easy to get you, you are in his mind the status of the day. In contrast, the mother-in-law is just the opposite, so she will see you as a "competitor", subconsciously fight against your "invasion". And these, it is her heart weak, sensitive performance, thus, she will be with you, refused to show weakness.
At this point, you may wish to take care of your mother-in-law's bad mood, encountered some of the things that are clearly not good for your mother-in-law, you can be generous, lowered your high head, showing that you have been defeated, wait until your mother-in-law's heart gas smooth, I'm sure that she will not be really and you're not finished.
5, don't let the filial piety and fraternal duty into cultural relics
The Eastern tradition of the elders for the big, so, in the mother-in-law-daughter-in-law relationship, the daughter-in-law innately to be vulnerable to some, respect for the mother-in-law, restraint and forbearance, it has become the virtue of the Oriental women.
6, skillfully care
In daily life, to learn to skillfully express your love and respect for your mother-in-law. For example, give her gifts appropriately. What does the gift represent? It is to show whether you really observe the practical things that the person beside you needs most in daily life. Giving gifts is not easy, but as long as you pay attention, you will be able to realize what can be sent to her "heart". After a long time, your mother-in-law will be able to feel that you give her a thoughtful and care.
Mother-in-law and daughter-in-law relationship is too bad 'solution 2'
One, and the boundaries between the mother-in-law is clear: clear boundaries means that you are clear that your mother-in-law is not your mother, mother-in-law is because of your husband's relationship will be close to you, but the mother-in-law itself may not be really with you very much, of course, if the two sides get along with the best, but not to be able to do so does not mean that you or mother-in-law itself! The only problem is that the two sides are not suitable to be friends, so less contact can be made.
Two, do not expect too much from your mother-in-law: some people expect too much from their mothers-in-law. Many young people want their mothers-in-law to help them bring up their children, do housework or give them financial support. But in reality, a mother-in-law has her own life, just like you may not want your mother-in-law to dictate your life, she is not obliged to be selfless for your life. So if your mother-in-law doesn't want to help you, there is no need for a lot of complaints and accusations.
Three, the mother-in-law to respect, but do not yield: mother-in-law is, after all, the elders, mother-in-law or to respect, due courtesy can not be fee. This is also respect for the husband. But perhaps the mother-in-law will have their own emotions and unreasonable requirements, then it depends on whether they are within the scope of the principle, if beyond the bottom line, the need for the husband to turn around a little, after all, the relationship between the husband and the mother-in-law more intimate some. Do not need to show respect for the elderly, filial piety to do something against the heart, these grievances are likely to end up back towards the husband outbreak, the relationship between husband and wife may be more unfavorable.
Mother-in-law and daughter-in-law relationship is not handled well, what are the good solutions?
Mother-in-law and daughter-in-law relationship is not well handled, what are the good solutions? First of all, you have to let your mother-in-law see that you genuinely like and love her son, don't treat your mother-in-law as your mother in the mother-in-law-daughter-in-law relationship, understand the sense of boundaries between the two generations, and finally communicate with your mother-in-law through appropriate language arts.
The biggest headache for many married people is the problem of getting along between mother-in-law and daughter-in-law. A family with a good mother-in-law-daughter-in-law relationship will be very cozy and harmonious, and a family with a bad mother-in-law-daughter-in-law relationship will have a lot of conflicts, and the family will become disharmonious. It is said that the relationship between mother-in-law and daughter-in-law is difficult to get along with, but in fact, there is a way to get along with the relationship that is difficult to get along with. If you want to deal with the relationship with your mother-in-law, there are actually ways to do it.
First of all, the first point is to let your mother-in-law see that you truly like and love her son. A mother-in-law cares most about her son, and if you make her feel that you don't care about her son and are self-centered all day long, then she will never treat you well because that is one of her most basic reactions as a mother. So make sure you let your mother-in-law know that you care about her son so she will mentally identify and accept you.
The second point is to never treat your mother-in-law like a mom. A mother-in-law is not the same as a mother, and it is impossible for anyone in this world to be as tolerant as your own mother. You should treat your mother-in-law as a common elder, and you should be polite and clear about your manners.
The third point is to use the correct use of language art to communicate with your mother-in-law. In the process of communicating with your mother-in-law, learn to use the art of language to let your mother-in-law know that your heart cares about her. Good communication will make the relationship more harmonious.
The fourth point is to understand that a sense of boundaries is important. As the saying goes there can only be one matriarch in a family. Young people after marriage to understand that they have married their own small family, so and between the mother-in-law to maintain a certain distance, after all, the distance produces beauty, to know the appropriate step back, do not and mother-in-law head-on conflict.
In summary, this is the way to deal with good relations with your mother-in-law.
How to deal with bad relationship between mother-in-law and daughter-in-law
How to deal with bad relationship between mother-in-law and daughter-in-law
Mother-in-law and daughter-in-law relationship is one of the topics that almost all women have to face, because both mother-in-law and daughter-in-law are the two most important women in a man's life. Whether the mother-in-law and daughter-in-law are harmonious is directly related to the harmony of the family and the success or failure of the career. In real life, because of the poor handling of this relationship is not a few families, in fact, in general, in daily life, the main attention to the following several methods, you can build a perfect family.
How to deal with the bad relationship between mother-in-law and daughter-in-law 1
Daughter-in-law should know
1, to understand the mood of the mother-in-law.
Before my son got married, my mother-in-law was the only woman who was closest to him. Now out of the blue a younger woman than their son "snatched", as the saying goes, "married a daughter-in-law forget the mother", looking at the painstakingly brought up children only think of his wife, the heart will certainly have a great sense of loss. As a daughter-in-law, think differently, do not just think that this man is your husband, you have to dominate all his thoughts and love, remember that he is first of all the mother-in-law's son. So when you have time, you should encourage your husband to come home to be with your mother-in-law, or take your mother-in-law out for a walk with you on your days off, and don't let the old man feel that it's so difficult to even see his children.
2, to keep in mind their role
While married, to change the former name from "aunt" to "mom", but do not think that you can treat your mother-in-law as a mother. What I mean here is not that there should be a difference in filial piety, whether it is the mother's family or the mother-in-law's family, in terms of caring for filial piety is to be treated equally. What I mean is that mothers and daughters can be no big deal to each other, no matter whether it is a joke, a prank or an argument, after all, it will not really affect the blood relationship. But the mother-in-law is not the same, you can be a little pampered, but definitely not capricious temper. Once there is a contradiction, it is likely to let the mother-in-law-daughter-in-law relationship to the freezing point, even though the situation will ease with the passage of time, but emotionally that crack I don't know if you can really mend.
3, to grasp the attitude towards the husband.
In front of the mother-in-law, the attitude towards her husband is something that needs to be worked out. If you are too intimate with your husband, your mother-in-law will feel that you are not self-respecting, no matter how pampered you are in the world of two, at least in front of the elders should be a little convergence. If you are cold to your husband, or if you are judgmental and judgmental, your mother-in-law will feel even worse. They hold in the heart of the baby let the wife so call and shout, it must be how heartbreaking ah. Even if the daughter-in-law to her again respectfully, there is no way to win the goodwill of the mother-in-law. Therefore, the daughter-in-law in front of her mother-in-law, must give her husband enough face, so that her mother-in-law's heart to get balanced, but also to prevent her mother-in-law jealous and should not have too many intimate small actions.
4, to "cater" to the mother-in-law's consumerism.
Mother-in-law and daughter-in-law in addition to the ideological differences, for consumerism is also a different understanding. Generally speaking, older people are concerned about saving, buy things affordable is the most important thing. Therefore if she is made aware that her daughter-in-law is a fashionista, she will definitely think that there is no way for such a daughter-in-law to be a good housewife, and that in her conception, being fashionable is tantamount to burning money. In fact, this is just an attitude towards life, but daughters-in-law should never try to be able to change their mothers-in-law's consumerism. It's hard to change your mother-in-law, but it's easy to change the price. No matter what kind of goods, as long as you feel that its real price is beyond the scope of the mother-in-law's psychological tolerance, then tell her when a discount it, 50% off, 30% off, as long as the mother-in-law do not think you lose money on the line.
5, to meet the mother-in-law's "vanity"
"The old boy", that is, the old man is like a child, need to be coaxed. For the mother-in-law, if you can hear people around you say a "your son, daughter-in-law really filial piety", the heart is like eating honey like sweet. Therefore, it is recommended that daughters-in-law have more time to go to the in-laws move, from time to time to give the elderly add some objects, such as clothing is a very appropriate choice, wearing out can be very proud to respond to others ask you where to buy "this is my daughter-in-law to send"! Although the elderly do not want these things, but from these items she can also feel your love, can enhance the relationship between each other.
6, do not fiddle with the right and wrong between your husband and mother-in-law
Clever daughter-in-law know that into a new and unfamiliar living environment is absolutely can not have the idea of transforming others, and more can not have the husband's family to follow you an outsider's habits, therefore, if you the daughter-in-law is smart enough to marry into the family of the in-laws try to follow the natural course of events, strict adherence to the rules of the in-laws to act, to know that "many years of the old man, but she can also feel the love on these items. To know "many years of daughter-in-law boiled into a grandmother", not your turn to make the decision when you do not try to change the husband's family ancestors set the rules, which can be seen as a challenge to the authority of the husband's family, will make you very much more than you lose. A wise daughter-in-law only modifies some of the rules when she closes the door to her own little family.
7, childbearing is a must
The vast majority of mothers-in-law also want to maintain good relations with their daughters-in-law wish, all new daughters-in-law into the door of the mother-in-law are greeted with a smile, in order to what? It's not that she wants a woman to help her family to do things? Smart daughter-in-law even if you do not want to get married and have children, but also can not say "no" in front of the mother-in-law, but with the natural or destiny will naturally conceive a child to cope with the mother-in-law's anxiety, just how to take precautions is the two of you, there is no need to let the mother-in-law know. Of course, if you are able to give your mother-in-law a little baby, then the relationship between you and your mother-in-law will be a little closer.
Mother-in-law should know
1, to correctly view the daughter-in-law
As parents of the life of the blood are poured into the son, in addition to hope that they will be able to excel in some achievements, but also in order to be older to be able to enjoy the children and grandchildren of the happiness of the family. The mothers-in-law are always worried about the daughter-in-law's joining is to take away the son's love for their own, in fact, think about it from another angle, now there is one more person to love their children, one more person to come to the son's sweet and bitter with the ****, when the mother's . Should feel happy is.
2, to be fair to the son, daughter-in-law
To put it mildly, the mother-in-law is also by the daughter-in-law slowly boiled out, in fact, is the most able to appreciate the daughter-in-law mood and situation of the person. If the two have a disagreement, can not be because of their own children on the heart to help the son of the daughter-in-law is not. It's normal for couples to have small fights, and it won't take long for them to make up. If the mother-in-law from the fire, I'm afraid that in the future the relationship between mother-in-law and daughter-in-law will be more like a fire. A wise mother-in-law should understand that "not deaf, not stupid, not to be a family man". If you really can not do for the daughter-in-law support, do not stand on the side of the son. Afterwards, you should also be more to appease the daughter-in-law, I believe the daughter-in-law will be touched.
3, to be tolerant, do not be too serious
Daughter-in-law, after all, is not a daughter, did not go through the hard work of their own pregnancy in October, the feelings are certainly not as deep as blood relatives. Therefore, don't think that your daughter-in-law will be better than her own mother, and don't always use a magnifying glass to see what your daughter-in-law says and does. Don't take what your daughter-in-law says or does with a magnifying glass. Don't take what she does personally, and don't think that she's targeting you. If you are not brought up by yourself, you will inevitably have friction in your temperament. As an elder, be open-minded, don't be general with the younger generation, and you won't let yourself fall into inexplicable distress.
The above is a simple introduction, in fact, come together is a family, a family to love each other, mutual suspicion and blame can only increase the burden of life and unpleasant. So we should cherish and treat the relatives around us seriously.
How to deal with bad mother-in-law-daughter-in-law relationship2
How to deal with mother-in-law-daughter-in-law relationship?
1, mutual understanding, mutual understanding.
2, learn to restrain yourself.
It is normal to have conflicts between mother-in-law and daughter-in-law, but if, after the conflict, you begin to quarrel, and even bad language to each other, it is very bad. Because these words you though because the emotion is too excited and mouth, but it is so words, more easy to make each other resent you. Because women on such things, in fact, will remember very clearly. Therefore, when the mother-in-law and daughter-in-law have a conflict, you have to learn to restrain yourself, as long as one of the parties can remain calm, then you will not quarrel.
3, usually to maintain feelings.
Between mother-in-law and daughter-in-law will produce a great contradiction, is because in the usual time you do not get along well, the relationship between you is not very harmonious. So in the usual time, you have to know how to maintain the relationship between the two sides. You can find time to communicate with your mother-in-law, the topic can be your husband, your children, or you can let your mother-in-law talk about her life experience, so you can have more topics, and through these exchanges, not only can enhance the feelings between mother-in-law and daughter-in-law, that can also be more understanding of your mother-in-law.
The relationship between mother-in-law and daughter-in-law is actually very simple, but you sincerely treat her, she sincerely treat you, as long as you really always care about each other, take care of each other, then the relationship between you and your mother-in-law will naturally be very good.
What should I do if my mother-in-law and daughter-in-law have a bad relationship in my daily life?
Since ancient times, the relationship between mother-in-law and daughter-in-law is like a cat catching a mouse, water and fire. But we all know that cats and mice have happy endings. After all, mother-in-law and daughter-in-law can also get along well. If the mother-in-law-daughter-in-law relationship is not good in daily life, what should be done?
1, learn to respect and understand each other. Mother-in-law and daughter-in-law should properly deal with each other, both sides should discuss things with the whole family. As a daughter-in-law, you should respect your mother-in-law because she is old and experienced in housekeeping. A mother-in-law should not always put up a fight in front of her daughter-in-law. She should see her strengths and respect her opinion.
2. Empathy. The mother-in-law can try to be a friend and learn to think in other places. There are differences between the two generations in the way they take care of their children and in their consumerism. When there is friction, take a step back and try to minimize the big incidents and minimize the small ones.
3. No matter who the parents are, children should respect them. And take care of them as if they were their own biological parents, because they are all family members. Maybe you don't have to grow up understanding in front of your parents, but you must understand to the other half of your parents, and filial piety is the first of all virtues.
4, broad-minded, let the mother-in-law. When you and your mother-in-law are in conflict over some trivial matters of life, if your mother-in-law is very reasonable, then, as a daughter-in-law, you should apologize to her and accept what she has done, but if your mother-in-law is wrong, then you shouldn't reveal it to her face. You can tell your husband afterward so that he can talk to your mother-in-law, which would be better!
5. Treat your mother-in-law as your own mom.
As daughters-in-law, we try our best to treat our mother-in-law as our own mother. While I know it's hard for us to do this, it's actually not that hard to start with the little things. For example, on Mother's Day, if you buy a gift for your mom and one for your mother-in-law, your mother-in-law will think from the bottom of her heart that your daughter-in-law treats her as her own mother and won't be so hard on you.
6, keep the distance. In Europe and the United States, mother-in-law-daughter-in-law relationship is almost non-existent, because their boundaries are very clear, the elderly will not live with the young.
So as long as conditions allow, it is recommended to live separately. Many families choose to buy two suites in the same neighborhood, and several families in our neighborhood even buy two suites in the same building. The purpose is to make it easier to take care of the elderly and keep a distance.
If conditions don't allow it, the daughter-in-law should try to minimize the time she spends alone with her mother-in-law, enrich her life circle as much as possible, and not always focus on the family. For example, the daughter-in-law back to the workplace, back to work; or take the children to the outdoors, to meet new friends; the elderly can sleep in the afternoon, or go out to play cards, square dancing in the evening, to broaden their social circle.