What you should pay attention to the first time you see your in-laws
Note one: do not rush to help the prospective mother-in-law to do things
The first time you see to go to your in-laws home, the first impression is very important, if the first time you are diligent, people will be according to the standard requirements of this, and in the future a little bit worse than that, you think you're lazy or pose. In order to avoid the future too high requirements for you, do not do too well for the time being. It is not to educate sisters to be lazy, but just to teach when to do and when not to do.
Note 2: Do not be supported by your husband-to-be in front of your in-laws
There is always one dominant in love or marriage, and that person can be your husband, but not your in-laws. People see their son in front of the daughter-in-law so hard, can still take you as a dish? If your husband listens to himself, will your mother-in-law dare to underestimate you? She is not afraid of losing her son? So you can not be in front of the mother-in-law by the husband to support the skid row, not to have fear, to be tough.
Note three: to know how to support the husband to do
The old generation's idea is mostly: the man is the head of the family, can not do housework can not enter the kitchen. But now the daughter-in-law who agree with it? The first door to the door to not in front of the mother-in-law to reverse the situation, in the future you are tired of spitting blood people think they should. It does not matter if a woman does some work, the heart of the cold is that people do not appreciate a pay a deserved look. The first time you do not support him, and then let him work in-laws feel wrong.
Note 4: appropriate to say to please the in-laws and sister-in-law words
Sisters for the first time to the door all want to give the future in-laws to leave a good impression, which itself is right. What's wrong is that some people are afraid of the hard, the more you please the more wrong, people do not please as a courtesy and take it as you are afraid of him. If the in-laws are the kind of people who know how to respect each other, then make a big effort to please, which will also enhance the relationship.
Note 5: the in-laws mentioned the principle of the problem to inch
Some hot mother-in-law has felt the small woman soft underbelly, know that the first door embarrassed to open the door to fight for the interests of the bride price and dowry should be a matter of fact at this time to put forward. For example, the mother-in-law said: "your little uncle this year, the family really do not have any money left, your affairs on their own more worry about it." Prospective daughters-in-law are generally embarrassed to speak out at this time, it would be wrong, you do not say anything people as your default, and then you pick again afterward that you are not right.
Precautions six: the first door don't send money
With what also don't bring money, first of all, how much of the problem, maybe in your eyes quite appropriate number in the eyes of the in-laws is a drizzle, may be said to be petty. Or you give more to give point, so that people can not pick reason. But have you thought about the future? The more you give for the first time, the more they expect from you in the future.
Note 7: Do not wear heavy makeup
A good face, a good face, will make the heart grow fonder, after all, people are fond of beautiful things. So, people can spend light makeup appropriately in order to make themselves more beautiful and more confident. However, heavy makeup is indeed a taboo, it will not only not increase the in-laws of your goodwill, but will also give you the label of "loser girl", "fox charming child", "not down to earth".
Precautions 8: Do not wear exposed sexy clothes
China is concerned about the beauty of tradition, especially the parents of the generation, so in the face of the in-laws to put away those overly exposed, overly sexy clothes. If you wear too revealing and sexy clothes, as the older generation, your in-laws will find it difficult to accept and find it unseemly. It is also best not to wear skirts, skirts can set off a girl's elegance and beauty, but skirts can't cope with all kinds of situations, because it is not convenient.
Note nine: do not say too many words
In the in-laws, chatting is an essential part of this time, this time, is the in-laws of your first understanding of the main steps. At this time, remember, the words must not be too much, more said more wrong, especially when you do not even know the in-laws of the most basic preferences and character. Of course, talking less does not mean not saying a word, you should seize the moment to talk.
Note 10: Gifts should be thoughtful
Gifts are very important when you pay your first visit. China is a traditional state of etiquette, empty-handed door is a very unseemly behavior. As for the gift, it is necessary to ask your boyfriend, they on their parents' preferences even if not 100% understanding, but it is also helpful. And, the gift must be comprehensive, for example, your boyfriend has grandparents, then you have to specialize in buying some suitable for the elderly, if there are small children, their gifts are also essential. Of course, the main thing is still the in-laws, can not be noisy.
The first time to see the in-laws talking skills
Do not need to be too able to say, a little warm, see people to say hello, basic courtesy to know, normal speech, not pretentious, not pretentious.
First, the need for decent dress, temperament focused on reflecting the gentle and generous.
So usually very trendy backless dresses, revealing the navel dress and other large areas of skin permeable clothes absolutely can not be worn, the skirt to more than the knee is appropriate. Nail polish can never be painted, there are tattoos to cover up, do not let parents see. Put on a light makeup, on a light lipstick, so it is almost, do not need to be how stunning, as long as the rules do not make mistakes can be. Never feel so rustic, this is the mother-in-law in the mind of the prospective daughter-in-law image, which after even fashion thick makeup some, are not a great impact, but the first impression necessary so.
Second, the gift needs to be pitched, not cheap and not too expensive.
The mother-in-law likes to send a fashionable shawl or bag, focusing on health affordable can send some can be hands-on supplements or daily need to use, really can not, you can also buy boxes of ready-made. But you can let your mother-in-law move a hand she will feel that you are also a girl who likes to do it, suitable for the positioning of a good wife and mother. One thing to note, never send something beyond the financial ability. This not only did not let the mother-in-law feel surprised, but will feel burdened, and even feel that you are not a good daughter-in-law candidate who can be thrifty.
Third, speak with art and eye. People who know how to talk are popular everywhere.
The quiet girl in addition to the necessary greetings and chatting, but also can smile more, can increase the good feeling score. Lively girl also do not because of their own words, they chatter, resulting in the phenomenon of the clamor. Words say more or less mainly depends on the prospective mother-in-law is what character, as the saying goes, the words of the mother-in-law less naturally want you to be more simple, quieter, smile and kindness more. You can also make some harmless jokes about your mother-in-law who talks a lot. Look at the actual situation to.
Fourth, the first time guests, you can take the initiative to show help in the housework. The first thing you can do is to take the initiative to do some pouring of water and handing of tissues.
When you take the initiative to help with the housework, if your mother-in-law agrees, you can do something appropriate. If your mother-in-law politely refuses, don't force her to help. After all, overly enthusiastic in the eyes of some people, will not add points, but will be wary. Do not show love in front of your mother-in-law, you can sincerely praise your boyfriend and your mother-in-law, you can also clip the food, but other prohibited it. Appropriate mutual pawn is to let the mother-in-law know that you are sincerely love her son, her baby son in you can still get proper care. But crossing the line will make your mother-in-law feel uncomfortable that someone is stealing her son from her. Naturally, she will not feel good about you. In short, the first door to see the parents of this thing, in addition to decent show your manners and talk and sincerity, to give the future prospective in-laws to leave a good impression, but also by the way to see what kind of boyfriend grew up in the family, family members and whether the harmony, after all, the appearance of the family of origin is the reference to you and your boyfriend to get along in the future. Never underestimate the influence of a family of origin. If it's a good fit, get married; if it's not, you need to think about it objectively and seriously. Overall, it's about being a girl who is polite, knows how to get in and get out, and is able to respect the other person.
The first time to see the in-laws do and don't
A, do not grab things to do
The first time to go to the boyfriend's home, the first impression is very important, but also from a variety of channels to understand the first time to the home should be how to behave. I believe that many of the results will be to be diligent. But diligence should also be measured, excessive diligence will feel that you are such a person, and later will be the first meeting of the standard requirements of your words and deeds. If you make and today's performance is not quite the same time. It will think that you are lazy, will think that your nature is a lazy person.
Second, in front of the in-laws do not always be boyfriend pressure
To the boyfriend's home, even if you live in your life you show again strong, in front of the in-laws must give enough face to the boyfriend, to give enough boyfriend's position. But often the opposite is true, you do this result will only think that in your two mouths, their son occupies a dominant position. This idea in their minds once formed, you think they will still take you seriously? That's why it's important to sort out your position when you meet for the first time. Don't appear coy, don't have fear and timidity.
Third, to know how to make the husband do things
In the old generation's concept, the man is the head of the family, is not allowed to enter the kitchen and cleaning, these should be the woman's duty. But now, after all, belongs to the young people. The idea should not be too pedantic. So change this status quo when you first enter the house. If you don't change this status quo, in the future, even if you are no longer hard and tired are supposed to be a woman's duty. Women do some housework does not matter, but if while doing housework but also to see the family clothes do not appreciate the look. Thinking about it is not too chilling some. So that the first time must be appropriate to point out that the husband to help themselves to do some housework, which can also make people feel your sweetness.
Fourth, the principle of resolute attitude
Smart mothers-in-law will be in the first meeting to feel the head of the future daughter-in-law temperament and bottom line. And they also know you first door directly mention the bride price and dowry issue is not polite. So they will be side-tracked to find out the bottom line. For example, some questions, some words, perhaps in your view that nothing, even if it involves the marriage time. All will be downplayed and said we are still young life will get better and better. If you say so, you are wrong, you can only say so for you to leave the words later. If you later on again because of the marriage on the matter of request words, will be people you today's words back out to plug you.
Pleasing your mother-in-law's four tricks
The first trick, sweet mouth
Daughter-in-law and mother-in-law to stay together, mouth to sweet, try to say good things, such as "jumping square dance field is quite powerful, mother-in-law good ah, etc.", that not only can bring her mother-in-law to keep up with the trend, but also can make her mother-in-law happy, two birds with one stone. The first thing you need to do is to get your hands on a new one, and you'll be able to do that.
The second trick, gift
In the end, the mother-in-law is a woman, but also for people daughter-in-law, women why difficult for women, right! For the mother-in-law and daughter-in-law to get along with each other, which the mood and situation she actually knows best. For people who have had a similar experience, as long as they are moved by love and reasoning, they can be turned into peace. But moving feelings in addition to sweet mouth, but also know how to send gifts to sensitize the mother-in-law, so send the right gift is very important.
The third move, smile
"laugh it off" and live in harmony with her mother-in-law, no matter what she says, do not contradict it, mother-in-law said, although sometimes too blunt some, but they are real, smart daughter-in-law to give appropriate understanding. This kind of "laugh it off" attitude, quite to the mother-in-law's temper.
The fourth move, pampering
Pampering should be a woman's strong ah, such as pampering behind their parents, pampering behind the husband, of course, you can also be pampered behind the mother-in-law, of course, this pampering can not be less than in the back of the mother of the same Oh, because she is not your mother, as long as she thinks you are her daughter on the line, not to mention that pampering in fact is a show of weakness.