Since ancient times, mother-in-law-daughter-in-law relationship may be one of the most difficult relationships in the world. Because of the different habits, life philosophy, and education concepts of the mother-in-law and daughter-in-law, it is very easy to have conflicts.
How many women look forward to getting married and having children soon and running a happy and fulfilling family. Some women have much expectation before marriage and much regret after marriage. Which in addition to and husband feelings fade, another important reason is the mother-in-law and daughter-in-law disputes.
Every daughter-in-law wants to live in harmony with her mother-in-law, but it is often difficult to do so after marriage. It is difficult for a daughter-in-law to treat her mother-in-law as her own mother, and it is difficult for a mother-in-law to treat her daughter-in-law as her own daughter. It's hard for theirs to live together without any problems, as if they are only connected by their role as husbands.
The mode of getting along between mother-in-law and daughter-in-law, in fact, as long as you do to maintain a proper distance, keep good manners, not to guarantee that the mother-in-law and daughter-in-law can get along with mother and daughter get along with the same comfortable, but at least you can make your mother-in-law-daughter-in-law relationship become smooth. The family will naturally be happier.
Women should not treat their mothers-in-law as outsiders and be in awe, and mothers-in-law should not treat their daughters-in-law as outsiders and be too defensive. Unhealthy mother-in-law-daughter-in-law relationship is small, mother-in-law-daughter-in-law often conflict, big influence on the relationship between husband and wife, and can even make a family become broken.
The way to get along with mother-in-law and daughter-in-law, in fact, as long as the grasp of a good point, that is: mutual respect.
Mother-in-law and daughter-in-law, although no blood relationship, they love the same person to live together. The daughter-in-law is not an outsider who gives birth to children and does housework, and the mother-in-law is not the superior of the daughter-in-law, so don't tell her what to do.
Mutual respect and tolerance is the way to get along with mother-in-law and daughter-in-law.
Between mother-in-law and daughter-in-law to a bowl of soup distance, if the mother-in-law at the beginning of the daughter-in-law as an outsider, the daughter-in-law at the beginning of the mother-in-law think too bad, then mother-in-law-daughter-in-law relationship will naturally deteriorate.
The Emotional Tree Hole
Mrs. Wang told me that after she gave birth to a child, the couple considered bringing her mother-in-law over to live with them. I thought that my mother-in-law was living alone, and they live with the elderly is not so lonely, and the neighborhood square there are aunts and aunts dancing square dance, can enrich the life of my mother-in-law, so that my mother-in-law to make more friends.
At the same time, the mother-in-law can also help to take care of the child, so that the couple can work normally and earn money for the child's milk powder. After all, it costs a lot of money for milk powder, diapers, and even for the child to learn various talents after a few years.
So the mother-in-law and Ms. Wang live together, but because of all the habits, different ideas, contradictions occur from time to time.
At first, because of the different habits of the young and the old, the dishes may not be to everyone's taste. The so-called crowded mouth is difficult to adjust. Ms. Wang likes heavy oil and spices, while her mother-in-law prefers light food, and her husband says he is not picky about what he eats and is begging for a meal.
She occasionally craves convenience, so she occasionally orders takeout. Older people generally consider ordering takeout to be wasteful behavior, and cooking for themselves is much less costly.
When there is a comfortable and good-looking stroller, Ms. Wang will also discuss with her husband to buy one, and which brand of clothes is of good quality. Although this is all for the sake of the child, but the mother-in-law will still think that the daughter-in-law will not be thrifty. The daughter-in-law is very aggrieved: he is your grandson, what's wrong with buying him good ones.
Husband found the problem, so the mother and wife gathered to the dinner table, holding their hands and said: before are three dishes, it is difficult to meet the tastes of everyone, you will burn four dishes, two slightly heavier, two slightly lighter. And the child's daily necessities, we all buy him good, after all, is mom's baby grandson, our couple's baby son. I try to make money.
Later Ms. Wang learned to respect each other, including habits, life philosophy, thoughts and behavior, etc.. Once encountered problems, face to face communication to solve, and no longer tucked away or behind the back to say no.
Later, whether the mother-in-law or daughter-in-law cooking, will take into account the taste of each. When the mother-in-law and daughter-in-law buy food, they will also purposely buy each other's favorite dishes, anyway, the husband is not picky about food.
But because the habits of the young and the old are different, sometimes unpleasant things still happen. My mother-in-law likes to watch TV dramas, but since she is a bit deaf, the sound is turned up loud. Ms. Wang sometimes works overtime at home, which causes a lot of trouble for Ms. Wang, and there is no way to concentrate on her work.
But considering that her mother-in-law usually takes care of the children and often helps with cooking and housework, it's also very hard. And it can't be helped that the old man's ears don't work well, and she will grow old one day. So instead of opening her mouth, Ms. Wang bought a pair of earplugs in order to be able to concentrate on her work.
Mrs. Wang has learned to put her heart in the right place and to respect each other. She knows that her mother-in-law can't help it, and it's impossible to change her habits after more than 50 years of living. She didn't force her mother-in-law to change her habits, but quietly bought earplugs herself, and the conflict was resolved.
After living for a while, her mother-in-law secretly told Ms. Wang's husband that she was very satisfied with her daughter-in-law, and that she was still considering whether to move in with her, for fear that she would not get along with her, and that she was thinking too much about her husband.
Mrs. Wang is also very satisfied with her mother-in-law, who, because of her old ideas, has a limited view of many things, and Ms. Wang will patiently explain to her. Granny does not know how to use some of the functions of the cell phone, Ms. Wang is also careful to teach her mother-in-law to use the phone.
Now the family is happy and happy. On weekends, Ms. Wang often walks around with her mother-in-law holding the children's hands. Her mother-in-law feels much better after square dancing, and she occasionally asks Ms. Wang to join her in square dancing.
There is nothing happier than Ms. Wang's husband, who smiles with relief every time he sees his mother-in-law and daughter-in-law getting along so well with each other and taking good care of their children. After all, family harmony, do not have to worry too much about family chores, he can feel at ease to earn money to support the family, to run this happy and happy family.
It is important to maintain a proper distance between mother-in-law and daughter-in-law, but it is not so that you respect each other and be polite. Mutual respect is for you to respect each other's way of life, thoughts and behavior to maintain a tolerant attitude. Seek common ground while reserving differences, each good lifestyle and thoughts and behaviors influence each other, and when one party sees the other party's behavior produces good results, she will also be interested in learning.
Daughter-in-law is her own mother's baby, son's wife, grandchildren's mother, mother-in-law do not take daughter-in-law as an outsider. A mother-in-law is also her husband's mother, her grandchildren's grandmother, and a daughter-in-law should not treat her mother-in-law as an enemy.
It must be a special fate that people who do not know each other can live under one roof. Both women love this same man, the same children, the same family, and believe that by maintaining mutual respect, all problems can be solved.
On the basis of mutual respect, keep a certain distance, maintain good manners, and learn to put your heart in the right place. As long as the goal and direction is for the good of the family, then you can be heartless and friendly.
If the conflict between mother-in-law and daughter-in-law is a violent storm, learn to respect each other can keep the wind calm and the sea wide open. This is the right mode of getting along, only respect each other, the family is more happy and fulfilled.