When I joined the company, I heard that I was going to Shanghai for training. I refused in my heart. Salary during the probation period is low, consumption in Shanghai is high, and self-sufficiency is a problem. Fortunately, the company is very user-friendly and provides us with accommodation and dining in the canteen. In fact, I am very grateful to the company for this arrangement, which prevents me from being stretched and unable to uncover the pot. For the food in the cafeteria, I am more grateful than I taste it. And I feel very happy. I don’t have to spend money on food and accommodation. I have almost no expenses except necessary clothes and skin care products. When I think about the Chinese New Year, I can save some money to buy my parents the gifts they want. I feel very relaxed! I can even imagine my mother’s tearful yet comforting teasing, “Our family’s money basket has also started to come in!”
I have thought about this scenario many times for many years. However, when I was studying, the internship salary and scholarships were directly used for tuition fees, and I didn’t seem to try to buy anything for my parents.
From being able to eat in the canteen to eating in the canteen every day, I ate for a month. I have never ordered takeout, and I have never participated in the excitement of colleagues ordering milk tea. The master who took care of me always teased me about my good appetite and thought it was amazing that I could continue to eat in the cafeteria for a month. In fact, everyone wants to do whatever they want, such as occasionally ordering a takeaway to improve the meal, without worrying about the price; or ordering a cup of milk tea when everyone is arguing about which milk tea tastes better...
In fact , it’s not like I can’t afford these. It’s just that I always unconsciously compare these consumption with the hard work my parents may have to put in, and I can’t enjoy it with peace of mind. For a cup of milk tea, my mother has to sweep the floor for 1.5 hours, and she is disgraced and picky by her boss; my father has to stay up late and be exposed to the sun for half an hour...
When you consciously or unconsciously take a cup of milk tea with your food, clothing, housing, transportation and necessities When it comes to labor, you should understand that this kind of enjoyment does not belong to you. Regardless of whether you can afford it financially, at least mentally you feel that you should not enjoy it. Of course, in the final analysis, you are still poor, and you always want to save money to prepare for possible needs.
When I was going to work, I was riding a small yellow car all the way and saw an old man squatting on the side of the road at the construction site nearby, using a green tea bottle to collect the tap water flowing out of the water pipe. The old man stared at the mouth of the bottle intently, for fear of water. Maybe he wanted to wash his face in the hot weather, or maybe quench his thirst... I can only feel sad but not sympathize with this situation, because my parents also do such heavy work and are even disrespected. And I don’t want to put words like sympathy on my parents.
I often think of last December. After looking for a job for two months with no results, I decided to first sign up for the county’s state-owned enterprise guarantee. My mother picked me up at the station at 8:30 in the evening and took me to a small restaurant next to the station to have a bowl of fried noodles. You feel ashamed and say that your parents are useless and cannot provide you with resources, so you can only find them yourself and crawl slowly. In fact, I felt really guilty and wanted to cry at that time. After studying for more than ten years, I could not improve my parents' lives or relieve their worries. Instead, I made my parents worry. But all I could do at that time was to sneak half of the grapefruit my mother bought me when I left the next morning and hide it in a place where my mother could find it when she rested at night. My parents are like this, and my sister and I are like this too. In fact, we both suppress a lot of desires. We are reluctant to spend it, but my parents are reluctant to even eat it. This is also the case for many rural parents and children from rural areas.
There used to be a very popular topic on Weibo, "Is there a sentence that makes you cry when you see it?" There was a short sentence on the hot topic, with tens of thousands of likes. What I fear most is that I won’t be able to grow up as fast as my parents will grow old. Probably many young people have this feeling. Many dreams are ultimately about giving a good life to the people they love, but in reality they often cannot. However, all I can do now is to seriously do a job that can only support myself. I can only read a few more pages of books and type a few more words on the Internet.
Of course, poverty at a young age does not mean anything. Many young people are still struggling to escape poverty. This is not shameful, because many big bosses have also come from such embarrassing and helpless days. The most important thing is to have the determination and actions to live the future well.
It’s not that I can’t afford the 12 yuan milk tea, but I’m not in the mood to enjoy a cup of milk tea yet. Parents are still trying to be content, so how can they dare to enjoy it?
When will I be able to let my parents dance square dances, play chess, and enjoy the leisurely life like retired old men and women in the city? Then I will probably wake up from my afternoon nap and have a cup of milk tea. mood, and I hope that day is not too far away.
Of course, this is just what I thought of from a cup of milk tea. It is my personal experience and attitude. I have no comment on the opposite attitude towards life. Everyone just needs to feel happy.
This is Pig Woman’s second article, ordinary thoughts on ordinary life. Thank you for seeing this, I wish you happiness! If you can, please give me a like!