Coax your girlfriend! !
Some students may think that since they are wives/girlfriends, they don't need to be coaxed. You know me ~
In fact, this is not the case. ...
Don't try to sleep until you are coaxed ...:)
-give a chestnut dividing line.
Recently, everyone should see hot search every week, just like Sister Xi.
This couple, whose names are like martial arts novels, will be found in every issue because of the performance of quarreling in the textbook "Coaxing Girlfriend" in the program "Dear Inn". Moreover, each issue is the same topic.
Some netizens said: "Adi has a thousand reasons to be angry, and Ji has 10,000 ways to coax her."
Some girls even said, "I can get every angry point of Adi, but Ji Chenling didn't coax me."
Then under every quarrel video, I am madly in love with my male ticket/husband.
But in last week's program, another loving couple, Tamia Liu and Kelly, who have been distributing dog food all the year round, actually quarreled! One is a young couple who have been in love for 4 years, and the other is a loving couple who have been in love for 10 years. The way to solve the quarrel is completely different, and the final result is different.
Today, Sister Xi took out some details of the program and talked with everyone. What is the appropriate way to deal with conflicts? What kind of way to get along with the other half can keep love fresh? You can also share your love preservation experience in the message area ~
Tamia Liu & Kelly Co.
Communication = education
Sister Xi mentioned above that in the new program, Tamia Liu and Kelly had an argument over material issues. If you have a reasonable partner, you must feel the same way after watching this video.
Is Kelly wrong? Actually, there's nothing wrong with thinking about it. Admittedly, if you want to open an inn well, you must solve the problem fundamentally, not just look at these 20 days, but Tamia Liu is also doing better, so that everyone can live a more convenient life. There is no problem with this starting point. Since their starting points are correct, why are there such serious differences?
The breaking point of Tamia Liu is that Tamia Liu gets off from Kelly and goes to the inn for dinner. In this process, Kelly repeatedly stressed his mistakes and stood on the opposite side of Tamia Liu and accused her:
What do you want with this useless thing?
Won't people like you be exhausted by things?
In fact, our handling method is actually incorrect.
So I'm telling you, you're naive.
Finally, add another sentence, "Is it necessary to prepare another plane to send guests?" Finally, ridicule the full score of skills.
Most boys will be very rational when they encounter contradictions and want to communicate with you as soon as possible, but sometimes the way of communication will be too rational and give you reasons to convince you, but at this time girls will be more excited, which may be counterproductive. Like Tamia Liu, who has always been good-tempered, he also expressed his dissatisfaction with such a solution as Kelly.
After they calmed down by themselves, the little gas in their hearts actually vanished long ago, and they had a very calm communication, spoke their minds and finally made up.
Both of them are in an emotional state when there is a contradiction. At this time, no matter how much truth you talk about, it will make the fire burn more and more. Everyone is an adult and has their own values and judgments. It is difficult for anyone to accept a person's condemnation.
Let's take a look at how Artie and Ji handle conflicts.
Adi&Ji
Drift with the tide
Sister, I should mention to you first that Adi was born in 1988 and Ji was born in 1993. They are five years apart, and Adi is really much more mature than Ji in dealing with people.
Some viewers said they didn't like this pair because Adi was too angry and tired to be coaxed. However, after watching the program, you will find that some of Ji's actions are really childish and unreasonable, and Ah Di's temper is really a little urgent, but when they quarrel, they all end up coaxing Ah Di with Ji's "stubbornness".
There was an accident at a barbecue without electricity. Adi found that everyone's mood was wrong, and suggested that Ji Chenling stop doing this, but Ji Chen Ling always insisted that there was a conflict between them.
The new issue of Kelly tells everyone in advance that Tamia Liu is not here, so the dinner is very simple. In order to save costs, everyone decided to make spaghetti, but Ji bought chicken legs. Adi found Kelly a little unhappy, and Ji Chenling pointed out that they had another quarrel.
Many viewers will think that Artie is making a mountain out of a molehill. Maybe it's because Adi cares too much about other people's feelings, so she wants to change Ji's careless character and hope that he will be more mature about things. However, if Ji can't understand why Adi is angry, similar things will continue to happen.
"Coax" is true. In some trivial matters, "coaxing" is indeed a panacea, but "coaxing" cannot solve the fundamental problem. I believe that good men who are willing to fool you all their lives are extinct, but that is very few.
These two pairs of CP handle conflicts in different ways. Some netizens say that this is the difference between a couple and a husband and wife, but no one is right or wrong in these two ways, and the result is that they are reconciled. But we can also learn from their mode of getting along and properly handle contradictions.
First of all, don't let the contradiction intensify further. Consider each other's starting point first. If the starting point is good, even if the result is not satisfactory, don't rush to blame. Like Ji, first show that you can understand each other's feelings, and then share the results with the other half and solve problems together.
Secondly, "coax" will only be the spice of your love, just as Ji solved the obvious contradiction in the shortest time. However, people who are coaxed should learn from Adi, give each other a step appropriately, and don't make mistakes again.
Ji Chenling-a "textbook"?
Finally, after they calm down, they learn from Tamia Liu and Kelly and communicate with each other sincerely. Find out the reasons for the contradiction, make three chapters, and urge each other not to make it again.
Sister Xi thinks that when two people encounter conflicts, they can "coax" each other's emotions like Ji Chen Ling and Adi, and then communicate the reasons like Tamia Liu and Kelly. If these two methods are combined, unnecessary quarrels can be avoided to a great extent.
Know how to compliment each other
The two pairs of CP in the program are always praising each other, which is very important in their love. No one will hate sincere praise from others, let alone the other half who has been in love for a long time
And sometimes many expressions are replaced by compliments, which are more acceptable to the other party. For example, in a program, Ji told Adi to go downstairs and Adi was putting on makeup. He thought it was too slow, but he insisted on praising: you are beautiful without makeup.
After saying that another guest was more handsome than him, Adi generously praised him: "In my mind, you are the most handsome."
In Tamia Liu's notes at the end of the first program, Tamia Liu deeply appreciated Kelly's initiative to wash dishes.
Dear husband: I really feel special to see you help me wash the dishes. You are a person who never goes into the kitchen. But looking at your brushed back, I feel very warm and feel that this back is very thick. This week's work schedule is too full, and now the state is not very good, and I am still in a trance. But with you around. I just need to clear my head and stay quiet.
Needless to say, Kelly has been praising Tamia Liu in the program, and once wrote a love poem in Weibo, saying: I am willing to spend my life with you until death do us part.
It may be difficult for some introverted boys to praise the other half often or in person, but in another way, you can have a serious talk on WeChat afterwards or buy some small gifts to express your praise for her. Of course, it is best to praise her in person, and it is better to praise her in front of others.
Some boys like the feeling of being dependent and recognized, so the lover is always sure that he will make him constantly ask for better. It is also important to give him face in front of others. Sometimes a joke played by two people in private is not suitable for talking at the dinner table, which is not difficult to do.
Respect each other's choices
Why does Ji Chenling spoil Adi so much? They have been together for almost four years. If Artie has been angry with him, I believe they won't last so long.
Ji wants to give up modeling career and become an actor.
"At that time, an insider said that being an actor would definitely be a fire, so at that time I followed the magic, learned to perform at home every day, and dreamed of stars every day. In fact, at that time, I also walked a lot of big shows, and then I gave up modeling and went to Beiying for training for half a year. When I am free, I shoot some magazines. I only earn three or four thousand a month, and I can't even pay the rent. "
-Weibo @ Entertainment Fresh
Adi, who was born in Beijing Film Academy, tried to dissuade him from giving up, but he finally chose.
"This is his own life. I can only help him and give him some reminders. How to choose specifically is his own business. "
-Weibo @ Entertainment Fresh
Ji Chenling also bought a Dodge sports car on impulse, but she regretted it not long after driving it: "My car is too long to drive in Shanghai."
In these two incidents, Adi didn't criticize Ji's choice blindly, but respected his choice when dissuasion failed. Let him experience and grow by himself. Sister Xi believes that it is precisely because Adi respects Ji's choice that Ji also respects Adi's advice in his later choices, and mutual respect is also a preservative for love.
Boys can pay attention to some suggestions given by your partner. Girls may sometimes make some suggestions that you feel a little naive or incomprehensible, but please listen carefully. As long as it's not something that touches the bottom line, try to meet her requirements. Isn't life made up of small things, but it is often these small things that can move people the most.
At the same time, for girls, try to respect boys' choices, including some hobbies. Sister Xixi heard many girls complain to me more than once, and her other half ignored her in playing games and was unwilling to go shopping with her. But let's think in another direction. If he doesn't play games or watch sports news when he goes home, it's not appropriate to watch Korean dramas and wear masks to chat with you.
Sister Xi thinks that as long as these hobbies don't harm her health, try to give them some time to do their own thing. Of course, you can also cultivate the same hobbies, keep pets, keep fit, and even play games and eat spicy food together.
In fact, there are many ways for two people to get along in love. Sister Xi has met many lovers, mutual, boring, naive and indifferent ... It is precisely because of the different personalities that the process from knowing, getting along with each other to falling in love between two strangers is very interesting. But no matter what kind of love, respect, understanding and trust are essential in any happy love.