It is often said that children are stupid. Will children become stupid? In life, children can't do simple arithmetic, so parents say their children are "so stupid". Some people say that children will become stupid, so they often say that children are stupid. Will children really become stupid?
It is often said that children are stupid. Will children really become stupid? 1 First, people often say that children are stupid. Will children really become stupid?
Experts say that improper wording by parents will affect children's psychology! Ms. Li has a son who is disobedient before going to school and sometimes loses face when going out. Parents educate well, but the effect is not good. There is no way, his parents often scold him. Under the violence, my son has some restraint, but he can't be as good as other children. Once, because I couldn't get what I wanted, I slept on the ground and rolled around, and my father spanked me. Afterwards, Ms. Li found that the child said something wrong, and when she asked him something, he stammered. After school, he often makes mistakes because of carelessness, and his parents can't help calling him a "fool", telling him to be careful and often reminding him that he will still make some low-level mistakes, which makes adults worry to death. Ms. Li wondered, is it because parents' improper education methods have affected children's mental health and made them really stupid?
Professor Fu Hong, an expert in children's psychological education, said that improper parental education methods often make children stupid, which will really affect their mental health and create the illusion that they are stupid. The phenomenon of children stuttering is a psychological problem, not a physical problem. His language expression ability is not enough, which shows that the child was improperly influenced in his early years. Professor Fu said that children with ADHD have more inferiority complex. Why? In fact, ADHD itself will not cause the child to feel inferior, but it will cause him to violate social norms and some rules and regulations. Teachers and parents will criticize and reprimand him for this, which will make him feel psychological pressure. He always feels that he is not doing well and is always criticized. After a long time, he became more and more inferior.
Professor Fu suggested that parents might as well observe their children's movements and language more, don't interfere with his behavior too much, and give timely guidance.
People often say that a child's idiot will really become stupid. Today, when I went out on business and arrived at the service building to wait for the elevator, I met an old man with a 6-year-old boy. Because the elevator was still on the 20th floor, bored children ran to the side to watch the monitoring in the security room.
At this time, another mother came with a tall boy, and the tall boy also leaned in to watch the monitoring. The two children began to discuss.
Grandpa, a 6-year-old boy, said, Look, there are four TVs in the room, and the two are side by side. Can one of you tell me how many monitors there are?
The two children began to count. Grandpa said, you see, each line has eight monitoring screens and eight lines. How many people are there?
Tall boys obviously haven't learned multiplication yet, so they add 8+8 line by line. It turns out that the little boy knows a little about multiplication. He said, "I know I should use multiplication!" " "However, judging from his reaction, it is obvious that he hasn't recited the multiplication formula, so he hesitated for a long time and didn't work out the answer. But he looked at the tall boy who had been adding slowly, but he couldn't use multiplication, and he not only became proud.
"How can I only use addition?"
"This line after line, 8+8+8+8 ... When must I add it?" That grandfather also reminded me.
That tall boy is completely immersed in his own world, ignoring what other grandfathers and grandsons say! Suddenly his eyes lit up and he said, "I figured it out. It's 64. There are 64 surveillance films here! " "The boy's mother looked at him and gave him an encouraging smile with a thumbs-up.
The 6-year-old child said disdainfully, "You add them one by one. This method is stupid. Multiplication is needed here! " "
Just then, the elevator came. Everyone got into the elevator. Tall boys press 22, six-year-old boys press 6, I press 18, and some people press 12. The tall boy looked at the lighted floor and said, "I'll give you a question." I'll go to the 22nd floor and you go to the 6th floor. How many floors do we have together? "
The 6-year-old boy looks contemptuous. He said, "How dare you give me such a simple question? Such a topic is boring, what is there to calculate? "
Seeing that the children ignored him, the tall boy counted himself, 22+6=28, so the floors we went to added up to 28.
"Hum, I don't want to calculate this kind of question!" Hearing the tall boy's answer, the 6-year-old boy held his chest in his hands and turned his head to one side to say.
At this point, the tall boy has fallen into the excitement of self-challenge. In addition to calculating the floors of himself and his children, he also began to calculate the total number of other highlighted floors.
Watching the tall boy ignore himself, the 6-year-old boy said more excitedly, "You are so old, you must be older than me, and you are still calculating such a childish problem!" "
After saying his word, the elevator reached the sixth floor, and the grandfather of the 6-year-old boy took him to get ready to go down. At this time, he still insisted: "You can't even multiply! What a fool! "
Hearing this, the tall boy and his mother stopped the elevator door and said, "Although our brother can't multiply, he has worked out the correct answer. You can multiply, but you don't even know the correct answer So don't just say that others are idiots! "
When the elevator door closed, the tall boy's mother squatted down and looked at him and said, "What did you feel when you just heard him call you an idiot?"
The tall boy said, "I am very angry!" " "
Mom said, "Well, I feel it. You are angry because you don't know why he scolded you, right? "
The tall boy nodded.
Mom said: "The boy who detected the problem earlier knows a new method called multiplication, and it is faster to calculate by multiplication than to add it up one by one." For example, if you know this multiplication formula by heart, you can directly know 8864, and the answer is 64. But mom thinks you are very powerful, because you use addition, and it is easy to miss a number in the process of addition. Once you miss it, you will make mistakes. You're right, mom thinks you're great! "
The tall boy looked at his mother and relaxed his eyes. Mother held him tightly in her arms and patted him.
Seeing this scene, I was particularly emotional and warm. This mother is so great. She perfectly solved the child's inner darkness and protected the child.
In life, we often encounter such a scene that children are laughed at, criticized and even abused by others because they are not as good as other children in some way. At this time, the mother's attitude and methods are very worth learning.
First of all, when the child is abused by others, the mother stands up to protect the child in time. Such a move seems insignificant, but it is actually very important.
Many mothers feel that their children's affairs should be handled by themselves, in most cases, but if their children are bullied or abused, mothers can come forward to handle them properly. Protecting children will let them know that "I am loved and protected!" " "This will give children a sense of security. Of course, mothers must remember to stand up properly instead of becoming a game between adults and children.
I once saw a child push another child to the ground. The mother of the boy who was pushed rushed over angrily, grabbed the kicked child and motioned for the child to take revenge. His child flew over and kicked the boy in the stomach. This treatment is obviously not acceptable!
Next, we should help children to resolve their emotions. Being accused and abused by others is definitely unhappy. Many times, children don't know how to face other people's attacks. If a mother does not guide her children to express their inner emotions and feelings, these emotions will be suppressed and they will slowly attack the children themselves. The mother can guide the child to express his emotions and feelings, which can resolve the inner haze of the child. When a child is affirmed, his desire to learn will be stronger.
The mother promptly guided the child to express his inner feelings, and the child's emotions were resolved. I believe that after this incident, children will also be interested in multiplication.
Of course, there is also a very important point here, that is, what attitude the mother should take when the child is inferior to others. At this time, many mothers can't be as calm as this mother, and they are not as good as others when facing their children. On the contrary, they will agree with other people's comments and think that their children are "idiots."
If the mother adopts this attitude, the child's self-confidence will be destroyed and he will feel "I can't! I am poor! " When there are more and more such comments, children will begin to doubt themselves and deny themselves. The shadow of "I am an idiot" again and again will be buried in his heart, and he will become unconfident. And inner self-confidence will turn into external self-confidence. If you master a little skill, you will feel great. When you see children who are weaker than yourself, you insult others. Once you meet someone better than yourself, your self-esteem will be seriously frustrated.
Take children who scold fools for example. He must often be called a fool by his parents at home. So he will become conceited when he sees people weaker than himself. But if you meet someone better than yourself, he will be jealous and resentful! Self-esteem will be seriously frustrated, and you may never stand up in frustration.
So, don't let parents' comparison ruin children!