I thought that children would become more and more sensible and obedient when they grow up, but I never thought that our family was full of rebellion.
Recently, kissing is always against adults. One day, after talking to grandpa, she concluded to herself:
Grandpa said Qin Qin refused,
Grandpa said kissing was wrong,
Grandpa said he didn't want Qin Qin to agree, ha ha, ha ha!
A very happy and proud look.
Grandpa can only smile silently.
Grandpa once made up a jingle to teach her to read:
Kiss is a good boy.
Love apples and oranges.
Never wet your pants.
Be sure to cover the quilt when you sleep.
There must be a CD for dinner.
At first, I was happy to read it fluently, but I was unhappy to see that we always used these jingles to urge her. One day, I suddenly denied the jingle and read it proudly.
Qinqin is not a good boy.
I don't like apples and oranges.
Never wet your pants.
Don't cover yourself when you sleep.
You must eat without CDs.
Grandpa lamented that Qin Qin would rather not be a good boy than fight to the end.
Grandpa thought, aren't you going to deny it? I'll do the reverse operation
Don't you eat? Then put it away and stop eating! At this time, Qin Qin will quickly say that he wants to eat.
Can't stop to play with water? Dear, will you continue to play with water until dawn? ...... Oh, stop playing, stop playing.
But this kind of operation will not work for two days. This time, she will only look at you meaningfully, which means I see through your tricks, and then I will go my own way.
Grandpa's method doesn't work, but grandma has a good method. Grandma always discusses with her kindly. Can we have another bite? Don't stop playing with water for five minutes, ok? Because she is not very clear about the concept of time and time, this method often gets good results.
Why do children rebel? Isn't it delicious to be obedient, kind, filial and harmonious? Grandpa was lost in thought.
It's really not that simple. Psychologically speaking, people's instinct has a self-defense mechanism, and out of the need of self-protection, people often show a defensive state of uncooperative. Rebellion is a kind of self-defense for children. Imagine that children are so weak and easy to be manipulated and controlled by adults. If they are obedient, how can they have their own thoughts and behaviors of freely exploring the world?
Of course, after all, children can't completely distinguish right from wrong and distinguish danger, and they still need the guidance and guidance of adults. Therefore, rebellion is a weapon. They just want to test the bottom line of adults and expand their free territory through rebellion. It can also be said that rebellion and confrontation are almost instinctive strategies for children to deal with adults.
Thought of here, grandpa can't help but sigh the wisdom and loveliness of human nature. Rebellion is really a reasonable human nature, and it has nothing to do with children's personality, not that they deliberately want to make you angry.
However, we should be careful. If you don't do it well, it is easy to fall into a vicious circle of rebellion-reprimanding, beating and scolding-escalating rebellion, turning this rebellion and confrontation into opposition and harm, accompanied by childhood, adolescence, and even life-long love and killing.
Of course, there must be countermeasures to deal with rebellious and confrontational children. First, I agree with the rationality of this rebellious confrontation from the heart and face it with tolerance, understanding and calmness. Otherwise, parents will get angry easily, which will often intensify contradictions and will not help. Second, unless there is danger, generally do not use the tone of command and reprimand to correct and stop children's behavior. Rebellion itself is a declaration of freedom. If we stop it rudely, it will certainly attract more resistance. At this time, parents can only put a low profile and use negotiation and compromise to turn the situation around step by step. The third is to appease her loss that she can't be willful. You can understand her loss, then divert your attention and provide more healthy and interesting expectations.
Having said that, it is still a headache to face rebellious children. Parent-child relationship is also a game of human nature in a sense. The good news is that we love each other!
Imagine, do we want a rebellious, clever, thoughtful and courageous child to explore the world, or do we want to cultivate an obedient and independent person?
At this point, grandpa came to the conclusion that our family Qinqin is a rebellious teenager!