1
What psychological problems are children in single-parent families prone to?
1, autistic
The breakdown of the family seems to be an "accident from heaven". For young children, lack of necessary psychological preparation, children also know how to compare. They will compare their present with the past and feel that their situation is much worse than before. They will compare themselves with the children of healthy families and feel that they don't add other people's children, which will breed inferiority complex, become timid, lack self-confidence, lack enterprising and positive spirit, and also feel that they are not as good as others.
These children are depressed because they are alienated from their parents, unwilling to get in touch with others, and often show symptoms of being nervous about the people around them. They always suspect that others will talk about their family's defects and their parents' divorce behind their backs. They think that others look down on themselves and are unwilling to open their hearts to others, so they are self-enclosed and do not show lonely and introverted personality characteristics.
Step 2 blame yourself
Self-reproach is manifested in the low evaluation of personal ability and quality, which leads to self-reproach, inferiority and self-degradation. All disappointments are attributed to their own shortcomings, and they tend to be afraid of what they have done. Children in single-parent families have a strong sense of inferiority. They feel inferior and pessimistic. Because of their low evaluation of themselves, they attribute their failure in work and study to their incompetence, which leads to negative emotional experiences such as anxiety, guilt and disappointment, leading to their overall psychological imbalance.
Over time, they lose confidence in themselves, and even for those tasks that can be completed with a little effort, they often give up easily because of incompetence. Many children from single-parent families always feel bad after being criticized. When others laugh at themselves, they always think they have done something wrong.
Step 3 feel inferior
Because they have been living in a complete family, facing the sudden breakdown of the family, children can't accept the reality in front of them and can't adapt to the environment without a father or mother. Children are psychologically immature and can't understand their parents' lives, let alone their difficulties. Young minds are fragile and sensitive, and have no ability of self-adjustment. Once hit, you will be at a loss, at a loss.
Children are most likely to think of their past lives when they see their peers playing happily with their parents. It's not what it used to be. Their inner sadness and loss make them feel depressed and inferior. Children can't find their own happiness, and they can't see where their happiness is, so they refuse to be happy and are immersed in anxiety and sadness.
4. Depression
Because of the split of parents, it will inevitably bring family smoke or cold war. Children live in a depressed space for a long time and are always worried about the relationship between their parents. Even children in some families have become punching bags for parents to vent their anger and anger. Children are in fear and worry all day and feel insecure. They are always worried and afraid of a civil war, which will tear them to pieces completely. Such long-term life torture, it is easy for children to produce fear and hostility, always keep a distance from their peers, have a strong sense of self-protection, and produce strong hostility. Children in single-parent families often feel depressed, depressed and fidgety, and there is nowhere to solve their psychological problems.
Because it is suppressed for too long, once it breaks out, the greater the energy, it is easy to produce extreme behavior. This tendency is manifested in girls wanting to cry or running away from home, while in some boys it is manifested in aggressive behavior.
Step 5 be alert
Generally speaking, children from single-parent families do not enjoy as much as children from healthy families, both materially and spiritually, which is exactly what every child desires. Because what children from healthy families can get is not easy for children from single-parent families, their psychology can easily change from initial envy to jealousy and monk hatred.
Psychologically, they will show a special attachment to their parents, hoping to get double returns from them. In terms of material enjoyment, if they can't treat this gap correctly and think that what others can get should be their own, it will easily lead to crimes such as theft.
6. Reverse
Children from single-parent families are vulnerable to ridicule and bullying by other children because of their low status in the "children's circle". But they are also eager for strict cars and appreciation, so they deliberately show their differences in words and deeds, and sometimes even like to "stand up" to show their existence value.
7. Anxiety
Anxiety about others is an index to examine the degree of premonition of difficulties and failures when contacting others. In the process of parents' divorce, children from single-parent families saw the mutual attacks between people, learned to bargain and learned to be hostile to each other. Therefore, they lack self-confidence in interpersonal communication, and their guardians are disturbed by the lack of family, so it is easy to bring this emotion to the communication with children. Children live in fear, spend a lot of time dealing with family relationships after family breakdown, and feel anxious and insecure about interpersonal communication.
Therefore, they feel uneasy and sensitive in front of everyone. When making friends, they are always afraid that others will speak ill of them. They are always unhappy with what others say, and they show retreat and anxiety in their relationship with others.
2
What care do children who grow up in single-parent families need?
1. Give children emotional sustenance
No matter which parent is raising the child, let the child know that he still loves him. Often use actions and words to imply that the child is his favorite person. Communicate with children often, give them emotional sustenance, give them a sense of existence, and make them happy physically and mentally.
2. Both parties take care of the children together.
If the child lives with his mother, does it mean that the child will lose his father's love from now on? That's not true. As a father, even if he can't live with his children, he should always visit them and tell them that he has not abandoned them. Divorce is his parents' business, not his. Always comfort him and help him in life and study.
Children should not be spoiled.
What parents should pay special attention to is not to spoil their children because they have lost their father's love or maternal love, but to let them do what they can with confidence and boldness, so that they can know that they have certain responsibilities to their families from an early age, so that they can consciously shoulder their responsibilities to their families and society when they grow up.
4. "Combining rigidity with softness" education
In life, fathers generally tend to cultivate and bravely educate their children, while mothers generally tend to gently educate their children. These two ways of education are indispensable for children. Therefore, after divorce, parents who raise their children should change their education methods appropriately, and "combine rigidity with softness" to make their children feel different love, thus making his personality development more perfect.
Children in single-parent families are all traumatized children, so parents should be extra careful when taking care of them, not only taking care of their physical health, but also taking care of their mental health.
three
Children from single-parent families have received the wrong education.
1. Spoil education
After many couples divorce, the children live with one of them. At this time, parents who take care of their children often have doting education. Because parents think they can't give their children a complete family, they owe something. Therefore, I have always been very obedient to my children, and I try my best to meet any material requirements put forward by my children. This can easily lead to children being spoiled, no matter what they deal with, they will be self-centered and unwilling to unite their classmates.
2. laissez-faire education
After divorcing his ex-wife, parents who are raising their children may ignore their children and let them "grow freely", regardless of whether their behavior is proper or not. This will easily cause children to have no sense of belonging, often feel lonely and disappointed, and have no enthusiasm for life. It is also easy for children to develop bad behavior habits in life, which is difficult to discipline.
3. Authoritarian education
After divorce, such parents like to pin all their hopes in life on their children, hoping that their children can make a difference in the future and make up for their inner defects. This kind of parents often bring great pressure to their children, which makes the family lack of laughter and laughter, and children tend to become inferior, shy, lonely and introverted. These are not conducive to the growth of children.