It's just that you are asking too much of yourself.
Why do you want to be the so-called healthiest person? Just let nature take its course.
It's normal to watch horror movies in fear, and it's normal for you to be disgusted when you see disgusting movies, because everyone has different likes and dislikes and different psychological endurance.
If you continue to ask yourself like this, you will really become unhealthy.
In fact, if you are not too hard on yourself, you will live a very easy life.
As long as you think you are a healthy person, you will become healthier and healthier. This is a good psychological hint, just like you suspect that you are unhealthy, and you will become really unhealthy over time.
In short, be calm and come on!