Why is people's will not firm enough?

Will process, cognitive process and emotional process are collectively called three psychological processes. Among them, the process of will can best reflect the subjective initiative of human psychology. The stable factor that constitutes willpower is called will quality. There are huge individual differences in people's will quality. The main will qualities are: independence, firmness, decisiveness and self-control. I. Independence Independence is manifested in a person's ability to make important decisions and carry them out. He is responsible and willing to be responsible for the results of his actions, and he is convinced that such actions are feasible. Independence is different from arbitrariness. Arbitrary behavior is manifested in ignoring the opinions of others, regardless of specific circumstances, and going its own way. Independence is related to rational analysis and absorbing the reasonable opinions of others. Independent people think rationally about their own decisions and their implementation: the implementation of decisions is feasible from a social point of view and correct from a moral point of view. The quality of will as opposed to independence is suggestive. Implication is blind obedience, no opinion, and easy to be influenced by others. The behavioral motivation of suggestible people is not generated from their own opinions and beliefs, but the result of being influenced by others. Second, firmness is manifested in long-term belief in the rationality of one's own decisions, and persistent efforts to overcome difficulties and implement them. People with high firmness have tenacious perseverance, full of faith in victory, not afraid of difficulties and setbacks, and are good at summing up experiences and lessons. They are neither driven by invalid wishes nor bound by expected methods. In order to achieve his goal, he is indomitable and indomitable. The so-called "wealth can't be lewd, poverty can't be moved, and power can't be bent" is a firm expression. The will quality opposite to firmness is vacillation, stubbornness and obstinacy. To waver is to doubt the intended purpose when encountering difficulties and give up the pursuit of the intended purpose without analysis. This kind of people are not good at forcing themselves to achieve their intended goals. When they encounter setbacks, they will shrink back, change their minds and be anticlimactic. Stubbornness, stubbornness, is not to make a rational evaluation of their own behavior, always acting alone. Such people can't understand the situation objectively. Although it has been proved that his behavior is wrong, he is still opinionated and self-righteous. On the surface, vacillation is different from stubbornness and stubbornness In essence, it is a wrong attitude towards difficulties and belongs to negative will quality. 3. Decisiveness is characterized by being good at distinguishing right from wrong quickly and being able to make decisions and implement them quickly and decisively. Decisiveness is different from rashness. It is based on sufficient foundation and thorough consideration. Decisive people have a deep understanding and sober estimation of the purpose, methods and possible consequences of their actions, so when the situation develops to the most urgent moment, they can take action decisively, quickly, unswervingly and without flinching. The opposite of decisiveness is indecision. The obvious feature of indecisive people is endless motivation conflict. When making a decision, he is hesitant and half-hearted; At the critical moment, I had to make a hasty decision without thinking, then go back on my word after making the decision, and even doubt the correctness of my decision after starting to act. Indecision is a sign of lack of courage, opinion and weak will. Fourth, self-control Self-control is the ability to control yourself. For example, the ability to control one's behavior and emotional response. In the will action, the temptation of desire and negative emotions (such as boredom, laziness and fear) that are inconsistent with the goal will interfere with people's decision-making and implementation. People with self-control can control themselves, restrain their thoughts and emotions that are inconsistent with their goals, eliminate the interference of external incentives, and force themselves to carry out decisions that have been made and have sufficient basis. People with high self-control can not only endure all kinds of pains and disasters, but also die when necessary for lofty purposes. Self-control is the inhibition of will. Impulsive, impulsive, unable to self-discipline, knowing the past and not changing it, etc. , is a lack of self-control. It must be noted that the quality of will has its specific content and cannot be evaluated abstractly without the specific content. As for the quality of will, we should evaluate it from the perspective of social morality in combination with its specific content. All the above will qualities are interrelated. If you lack any of these qualities, it will inevitably bring some defects to your character. Will control (will control) refers to the process that an individual can influence the process and result of an event to make it consistent with the expected purpose. The control function of will is manifested in two aspects: on the one hand, it is extroverted, that is, it changes the environment (natural environment and social environment) according to the expectation and purpose of the subject; On the other hand, it is introverted, that is, it changes or shapes its own quality (physical quality and psychological quality) according to the expectation and purpose of the subject. The former, for example, we transform barren land into fertile farmland, and we take reform measures to bring enterprises on the verge of bankruptcy back to life; The latter, for example, we insist on scientific exercise methods to strengthen physical fitness, and we cultivate ourselves into people with ideals, morality, culture and discipline according to internalized social expectations. The control of the will over the environment is closely related to its control over itself. This control function is realized by encouraging and restraining actions. Incentive performance is to promote people to take positive actions to achieve their goals. For example, in order to master a foreign language, Will will push people to listen to foreign language broadcasts, memorize words, find information, engage in translation and so on. Restraint is manifested in stopping behaviors that contradict the expected purpose. For example, in order to master a foreign language, Will encourages people to control some bad habits (such as sleeping late) or give up some activities (such as playing chess and cards). ) hinders their study. Therefore, the incentive and constraint of will on action control are interrelated in specific activities. The stronger the action taken to achieve the expected goal, the more restrained the action that contradicts the expected goal; On the contrary, the more we can restrain actions that contradict the expected purpose, the more powerful the actions we take to achieve the expected purpose. It is through this kind of encouragement and restraint that will realizes people's control over themselves and the environment. Will control to eliminate internal and external obstacles in the process of achieving goals. Internal obstacle refers to the internal interference that conflicts with the goal realization. Such as lack of confidence, determination, fatigue, distraction and so on. External obstacles refer to external interference, such as insufficient funds, lack of materials, outdated tools and bad weather. , or from other people's obstruction, ridicule, blow and other mental pressure. Only by overcoming these obstacles can we carry out the control function of will to the end and achieve the predetermined purpose. There are great individual differences in people's will control ability. Some people can control their behaviors and emotional reactions, stick to their opinions in the face of external pressure, move towards certain goals, and tend to be responsible for major events in their lives instead of blaming the environment or fate. Some people can't control their actions and emotional impulses, often waver in actual actions, and tend to blame the environment or fate instead of taking responsibility for themselves. There are stable differences between people in the attribution of behavior results. People can be divided into internal control type and external control type, that is, people who believe that they can control the environment (internal control type) and people who believe that they are controlled by the environment (external control type). People with outstanding external control usually blame the environment or fate, and rarely see the connection between their own abilities or efforts and the consequences of their actions; However, people with internal control have strong self-confidence, tend to take responsibility for themselves, and often feel the connection between their own abilities or efforts and the consequences of their actions. ... out of control when people encounter threatening situations and are unable to cope, they will feel that they have lost control of the incident, which is called out of control. The natural environment, social environment, life and death in the world may all become threatening factors, making us lose the ability to control events. For example, flash floods, traffic disruptions delayed scheduled appointments, and men and women in love could not be combined because of their parents' opposition. The time out of control is long and short. It takes a short time for the exam to get out of control, and it may be eliminated soon after hard work. And the cause of death in prison, he was out of control for a long time. When out of control, people's reactions are different, but generally there are behavioral reactions such as seeking information, strengthening the response to difficulties, resisting or depression. (1) Looking for information One's first reaction after losing control is to get more information so as to form a correct understanding of one's predicament. The demand for more information often brings two consequences: first, it is more sensitive to environmental impact; Second, the processing of the obtained information is more rough. For example, when a person suffers from a disease he doesn't understand, he often tries his best to find information about the disease. He is particularly sensitive to the conversations between doctors and people around him about diseases, and his understanding of obtaining information is often one-sided. If the out-of-control person gets more information, he may have a more comprehensive understanding of his predicament, or he may find a way out, so as to restore control of the incident. (2) The intensification of the response to the dilemma. People often regain control when they are out of control. In an experiment (Ovsiankina, 1928), subjects were asked to do some simple tasks, such as piling wood, counting beads, making clay by hand, etc. The subjects were interrupted on the grounds that the Lord tried to let them go outside. After a while, they returned to the room, and all the subjects automatically restarted their homework without exception (the restart rate was 100%). In another experiment, when subjects are doing a certain homework, they are asked to stop the current homework and do other homework. At this time, the subjects obviously want to finish their homework as soon as possible in order to restart the interrupted homework (the restart rate is 79%), even if the examiner explicitly prohibits them, they still have to finish the interrupted homework. After losing control, if people don't anticipate the predicament in advance, its negative impact will be even greater. Experiments show that if the subjects are given electric shock, noise and other distractions, if they can't get the information of the distractions and can't control them, their negative reactions will be aggravated, such as increased adrenaline secretion, accelerated heart rate and nervous and anxious reactions. In another real risk (Glass & Singer, 1972), three groups of subjects are required to complete an assignment under noise-free and controllable experimental conditions, and then two groups of subjects are required to complete another assignment without noise. The results show that uncontrollable noise not only interferes with the completion of the first task, but also reduces the completion level of the latter task. The controllable noise group does not affect the completion level of the following tasks. This shows that out of control will still have a negative impact on future behavior after the predicament disappears. (3) There are many kinds of frustration behaviors after struggle or depression is out of control, and the most prominent are two kinds of frustration reactions: struggle and depression. When people's existing control ability or the control ability they will have is forcibly cancelled or threatened, it is possible to have a resistance (or resistance) reaction. The main reason for resistance is that the free choice of the result is threatened, the choice that could have been made is cancelled by external forces, or when the choice is about to be made, people will resist or resist. When out of control, if people expect more freedom of choice (think that the result is more valuable), and the cancellation of control ability will affect other aspects of freedom of choice, then the intensity of resistance will be greater. When out of control, resistance will cause the following emotional and behavioral reactions: (1) anger, hostility and aggression. If you take away children's toys or block their way, they will be angry, hostile and aggressive. If you are treated unfairly, you will also have the above emotional reaction. (2) Try to restore the lost control ability. The child in the above example will ask you for toys and break through your "defense line"; Adults who are treated unfairly will fight hard and demand fair treatment. (3) The understanding of the results will change. The choice that is forcibly cancelled by external forces becomes more attractive, and the result that remains becomes even more undesirable. For example, if the free love between young men and women is forcibly separated by external forces, the above-mentioned changes in understanding will occur. (4) Symbolic restoration of freedom of choice. After a person is frustrated, he will often have all kinds of fantasies and restore his lost control in a symbolic way. Depression is another reaction to losing control. In many ways, it is just the opposite of struggle. Struggle will produce anger and hostility, and strive to recover lost freedom, while depression will give up and give up efforts to change the predicament. When trying to change an unfavorable situation repeatedly fails, depression often occurs. If repeated efforts to regain control are unsuccessful, people may stop trying and become depressed. Depression caused by losing control in one aspect of life may affect other aspects of life, give up one's due efforts in other things, and even mistake controllable events for uncontrollable events. Depression may also cause long-term anxiety and depression. After losing control, people's reactions to setbacks vary widely. Some people are persistent and indomitable, and try their best to regain control in order to achieve their goals. Some people will feel depressed and depressed after losing control of their emotions, and even have a mental breakdown and abnormal behavior. Psychologically, the ability to bear setbacks and avoid mental breakdown and behavioral disorders is called frustration tolerance. Many studies have shown that resistance or depression after losing control is related to the following situations: (1) People with strong internal control are more likely to lead to resistance, while those with strong external control are more likely to lead to depression. (2) People who have few out-of-control experiences in the past are more likely to struggle, while those who have experienced many out-of-control experiences are more likely to cause depression. (3) Generally, it is easy to have a struggle immediately after losing control, and it is easy to have depression after the failure of efforts to regain control in the struggle. (4) People who are used to control for a long time (such as middle-aged successful men) are easy to struggle, while those who have no control experience (such as women and children) are easy to give up when they encounter difficulties that cannot be changed. The journey of life cannot be smooth sailing, and out of control and setbacks often occur. Therefore, everyone should consciously fight against difficulties in order to exercise their frustration tolerance and make themselves strong in life. Frustration tolerance is cultivated by overcoming difficulties, overcoming setbacks and eliminating out of control.