The snow on the horizon is falling quietly, but who has seen the waves in her heart? The wind is still blowing gently, but it blows away the blue sea and blue sky on her pure land.
Is the light too dazzling? Why do eyes shed tears retroactively? But it's daytime. Is the season stepping on the wrong time? My heart is old in an instant, but it's winter now. Shouldn't you be pregnant?
Raise your head and hold back your tears. She can't cry. Grandma won't like her crying, let alone want her to be sad. However, contrary to expectations, half of the tears dripped silently along the corner of my eyes, and the other half flowed into my heart, wetting my memories.
After a long time, it seems that I have been crying all my life, and my eyes are astringent and painful. No, she can't cry anymore, because the person who loves, shelters, indulges and runs wild is gone. No one will love her, wipe her tears and protect her, so she must learn to be strong and brave in everything. Wipe your face with rain at random, or accept the reality.
The house was crowded with people. Is that to mourn grandma? She looked at all this from a distance, clearly agreeing to face it, clearly agreeing to be strong, but why can't her feet move at all like lead? Why does something keep falling when it is clearly agreed not to cry? With warmth. The vague fog in front of her eyes made her look a little unreal, and she wanted to be cut off.
"Blue dove is coming, why don't you come into the house? Hungry? Go and eat. " A middle-aged woman greeted with a smile. It's that voice again. How annoying, still so fond of laughing, isn't there a little sadness? Glen didn't want to talk to her. Her eyes bypassed her and she went straight away. She hates her. Why can she still laugh so happily at this time? Glen hates her smile. She wants to throw up everything in her stomach.
At that time, Glen knew that if you don't want others to see your vulnerability, you should pretend to be cold and strong.
Pushing open the door, there is not even a quiet corner. The loud noise filled her soft eardrum and it hurt. Her indifferent eyes swept around and she walked into the wing with her schoolbag on her back. The moment she unloaded her schoolbag, it seemed that the last weapon had been paid, and she finally cried again. Only this time, I cried my eyes out, cried hysterically, spared no effort, cried so loudly and cried so indulgently. She covered her face with a quilt and didn't want to be seen crying and her face was twisted. But the little body is shaking violently.
If someone had comforted her and given her a little warmth, maybe her heart would not be so cold. But no one has ever comforted her and reassured her. At that moment, I was not only heartbroken, but also cold, irretrievably cold.
It turns out that only grandma in the world really loves her!
Glen hid in the house, too scared to go out. She just wants to hide there forever, no one bothers her or destroys it, so quiet!
"Blue dove, hurry up and come out for dinner. Why can't I get out once I get in? Hurry up! " The middle-aged woman shouted outside the door.
In fact, it was none other than Glen's mother, who didn't even look at Grandma Glen during her illness. A woman who is extremely cruel. Glen has never lived with her since she was a child, so she has no feelings. Plus this incident, Glen only has deep hatred for her, her ruthlessness, her indifference to her grandmother and her hypocrisy. If she is nicer to grandma, maybe Blue Pigeon will consider accepting her and bury the hatchet. But she still lost this opportunity, so that they could not open each other's hearts and return to the original simplicity.
Glen ignored the woman's cry and sneaked out of the house when no one was around and went to the vast land. Grandma used to be busy with farm work here, always sitting lazily beside her, watching her swaying figure under the rings of years. Grandma can always grow red tomatoes, green vegetables, small peppers like lanterns, and large rape groves ... and she just sits by and enjoys them. She used to think that grandma was the most capable person in the world, never getting old and never dying. But she was wrong. Her dear grandmother was tired and old, and she couldn't stand the wind and rain of the world any longer, so she left. Announce her escape in a cruel way that will never be forgotten. Perhaps only this person can remember that there was such a woman on the earth, a hardworking woman, a kind woman, a warm and humble woman, an unforgettable woman and an unknown one.
Winter has arrived, and the rape flowers planted by grandma have withered, like her life, and disappeared in the cold wind. Wearing a big hat, her whole head shrank and she felt the warmth coming from her body.
In an instant, darkness covered the earth like a net, and it was dark. The night wind swept across the earth and ravaged the world. In the dark, the blue dove smiled: Great, so you can't see the sadness, so you don't have to pretend to be arrogant, so you can remember you gently, so you can miss you selfishly, so you can occupy your thoughts. Silent Shan Ye, Blue Pigeon is very quiet, memories wander on the edge of time, grasping the past greedily with both hands. She thought she could keep something and catch something, and her face was rare and gentle. I just didn't notice anything sliding across my face.
"Blue pigeon, blue pigeon, where are you?" The sudden sound awakened her intoxication. She knew it was that woman again. So she buried her head deeper. Don't let a woman see her vulnerability. It should be stubborn in front of her.
"Blue dove," the woman came to her side and stretched out her hand to pull her, but she dodged. "Glen, go home with your mother, will you?"
As if he had been poked by something, Glen looked up and smiled. Looking at the woman: "Home, where did I come from?" Tears once again unwillingly flowed out. "Mom, where did I get my mother? Did you give it to my family? When my grandmother died, my home was long gone. She built a prison in my heart, locked me up deeply, locked me up firmly and never got out again. " This is her growl at the person who claims to be her mother, but her words are full of sadness.
Looking at the heartbroken blue pigeon, the woman bowed her head guiltily and whispered, "Blue pigeon, mom is wrong, please forgive her." OK or not? Forgive me. "In my memory, the girl in front of me always smiles happily. It shouldn't be like this, okay? Blame her for not being around all these years? But in the days when there is a grandmother, the blue dove really laughs happily.
"Ah," sneered the Blue Pigeon contemptuously. "Forgive you, it's impossible in this life."
"Glen, don't do this to your mother. Mom really knows that she is wrong. " The woman held the blue dove's hand tightly and finally burst into tears.
The night wind blows from time to time, messing up their hair. The blue dove broke free from the woman's hand and brushed the hair from her forehead. Look at the dark night sky and the vast Xinghai. "You said you were wrong, then where are you wrong? Not because you didn't take care of me, let alone because you weren't with me. But you ignore my grandmother. "
The blue dove took a deep breath on her nose and turned to look at her coldly. "Where were you when grandma was sick? Did you call her? Have you ever cared about her? How much has she done for you? How much do you know? Even if the whole world can fail her, only you are not qualified to fail her! But you failed her. "
Because the blue dove couldn't say a word, the woman had to look at the girl in front of her and bring out her sins together.
"Also, do you know how scared I was when I went to see my grandmother? You have the heart to let me go to a place I haven't been to, aren't you afraid that I will lose it? Have you ever thought about me? Do you know that your so-called daughter is a person who has lived in the countryside since childhood and has never been to the city? Aren't you afraid of my accident? Do you know how many times I was laughed at there? Do you know how many eyes I have there? I don't know anything and I don't know the way. I'm afraid I'll get lost. I'm scared. I'm afraid of everything. But where are you? They said I was from the countryside and looked down on me. I'm fed up with this cruelty. So I am small, I feel inferior, and I can't lift my head. But there will always be people who will not do this to me. She is the only person in the world who says I am beautiful. She will not look down on me, let alone laugh at me. In fact, it doesn't matter how I am, it really doesn't matter. I don't need their approval, I don't need self-esteem, I don't need anything, I just want my grandmother to be good. But you don't even want this only chance to atone. "
"I'm tired, really tired. Stop following me. " Finally, the blue dove left and walked out of the land. Without looking back, the woman left behind swayed in the night wind.
Glen's figure drifted away, but the moonlight pulled her shadow so long that it hurt her. The woman thinks: If Grant is given a chance to choose, will she not hesitate to choose her grandmother or even look at her? It turns out that once love is planted, it cannot be transplanted. And she will never touch that girl's heart again!
The stars are flickering faintly, which can't illuminate the hearts of the world. There is only a sigh echoing between heaven and earth!
The dazzling lights lit up the hut, and the blue pigeon stared at the coffin in the center of the lobby for a long time. She doesn't want to go because her dearest friend lives in it. In her mind, she and grandma are like sisters. She always tells her grandmother everything, happy, unhappy, confused and puzzled. ...
The Dojo people are about to start, and Glen covers his ears hard. She left, hid in a dark room and never saw anyone again.
The room was dark, but she didn't want to turn on the light, see anything related to her, or touch memories related to her.
So she chose to hide in a thick quilt, touch out her mobile phone in the dark and plug in headphones. She thinks that she can't think, that she can be isolated from the world, that she can't see anything, that all the voices about her can't be heard. But the single cycle of the mobile phone still makes her memory flood!
Wait a minute was originally a love song. How did you get to her and become a song recalling the past?
"Wait a minute, why can't you wait for me for a minute? If I hold on for another minute, hold on for another minute, will I see you again? Why can't you wait for me for another minute? Why? Why? " Tears kept falling from the corner of her eyes. She kept asking, but no one answered her.
Maybe it's her fault. If she had come home from school that day, she might have made it. But she still didn't go back, so they missed it, even the last time. From then on, she fell in love with the song "Wait a minute" and blamed herself.
In this life, grandma has been very tired and hard. In the dark, the blue dove whispered, "Grandma, let's exchange roles in the next life." I will become you, and you will become me. " I will take care of you in my next life! You must wait for me. "
She no longer loves talking, laughing and wanting to see people. In this way, a few days passed, and grandma's funeral arrived as scheduled, without delay or accident.
On that day, the sky was covered with heavy snow, and the trees and peaks were covered with ice and snow. Their family knelt in the biting cold wind to send the old man away.
Glen knelt on the outermost side. She hung her head and dared not turn around. She's afraid that she won't be able to bear it. She's afraid that she will cry in front of everyone. She listened to the loud noise of firecrackers echoing in the empty world and felt a group of people carrying coffins passing by her. Are their footsteps too heavy, or are the people in the coffin too busy?
They went one step further and put her in a cold pit covered with thick yellow mud.
It is difficult for Beauty to comfort the book a little, but she asked the moon to send notes. Is your mind too delicate, or is it the morning cream dancing in the breeze?
~ after many years, the blue dove will still cry when she thinks about it, just like the original tears. Only she never went back. She hides a person deeply, and in her heart, no one can see. Take her wandering around and fly away!
The mysterious flowers of July and autumn
The weather in July, like an affectionate girl, is both happy and sad, and the rain keeps falling. Let the already uneasy mood become heavier. I don't know why, but I always feel that I have to lose something. I stretched out my hands and tried to hold them hard, but for a long time there was no result I just grabbed a phone call at random, but I still got nothing, and my heart was even more lost, like a defeated rooster. I suddenly remembered what I once said to you, and now I am like him in the past. It feels like history is repeating itself.
Every time I dream, I will have the same dream, a blooming enchanting flower, but I just can't understand her flower language and can't tell which one she belongs to. There are not only the beauty of roses, but also the fragrance of lilies, the nobility of peony and the warmth of Kanglaixin. That flower is like a flower collection. I have never known her name, but I do deeply remember that it blooms in July and has a beautiful name. It grows in a sentimental season in July and autumn.
There is still so much rain in July, and the temperature in July is still changeable. Raindrops beat on the ground, making a tinkling sound. This pre-flowering scene brings together the residual images that were hit by undue raindrops. In the face of heavy rain, I shuttled through the rain just to find the July and autumn I was looking for. I asked a lot of people, and everyone shook their heads and said that they had never heard of this flower called July Autumn. Did I remember wrong? She has another name. But I firmly believe that the flower in the dream is called July and autumn, because in the dream, I am waiting. While quietly guarding the flower, I want to listen to the language of the flower and read the string songs in her heart. A voice told me that her name is July Autumn.
Looking back silently, that person is indeed at the light bar, just like this poem, running around in the heavy rain, searching hard, feeling lost, and suddenly finding this flower around him, which is exactly the same as in the dream. All the flowers were knocked down by the rain, but she is still so bright and consistent with the scene in the dream. In order to verify whether the result I found is correct, I found a flower farmer and asked the name of this flower. The florist told me that her name is July Autumn, which is a very special and mysterious flower.
Looking at the July autumn smile and staring at it, I can see that the flowers are silent and indifferent to the wind and rain. Staring at her quietly in the rain, the rain soaked my clothes, I don't know yet. It was the flower farmer who reminded me to wake up from my dementia. The flower farmer said, I stayed in the house for a long time, but when I came out, I still saw you standing alone in the rain, staring at this autumn in July. Your clothes were all wet and didn't move a step. Since you like that flower so much, I'll give it to you. I thanked the gardener, but I still couldn't take my eyes off her, the autumn flower in July.
Although this autumn in July is the only flower in this area, it is also the only flower, but it is for a predestined relationship. You can take it. After that, you put the pot in July and autumn in my arms, and the flower in your dream finally made me find it in reality, making me the only one who has her in the world. I held this pot of July and autumn tightly in my arms. The sky is always so gloomy and rainy, and July and autumn in my arms give off bursts of flowers, which is so beautiful. It smells so good!
Another year, flowers bloom and fall, the moon is in the water and flowers are in the mirror. Perhaps this sentence can best describe the current mood. Under my care, July and autumn are still so gorgeous, just like roses in the rain.