Complete lines of Song Xiaobao's essay "Touching Porcelain"

touching porcelain, originally belonging to Beijing dialect, generally refers to some opportunistic and extortion behaviors. Nowadays, the phenomenon of touching porcelain has stepped onto the big stage, being ridiculed and getting social attention. The following is my collection of classic lines about Song Xiaobao's sketch "Touching Porcelain". Welcome to read for reference!

Haiyan: alas, mama, mama, mama, mama

Song: alas, Haiyan: What did I hit?

song: you hit someone!

Haiyan: did I hit someone?

song: it's not a potato.

Haiyan: it's not

song: oh, my god.

Haiyan: it's not

song: oh, my god.

Haiyan: where did I hit you?

song: oh, my god, my heart hurts.

Haiyan: I bumped into your heart.

song: no, oh, my god, my legs.

Haiyan: legs, legs, I bumped into your legs.

song: hmm.

Haiyan: can you move?

Song: It takes a little effort to move. Please help me get that bag for me. Hurry up. Oh, my gosh.

Haiyan: Oh, I'll take you to the hospital.

Song: Don't go to the hospital.

Haiyan: Ah, no,

Song: Why go to the hospital?

Haiyan: Can't I take a picture when I go to the hospital?

Song: No need. Oh, my gosh.

Haiyan: What should I do if I don't go to the hospital?

Song: What kind of film? ... After filming, my calf is broken and hurts everywhere. Oh, my gosh.

Haiyan: Stop it. You touched porcelain.

Song: You just realized that it's not the first time for you.

Haiyan: Right. You don't have to worry about it.

Song: What are you doing?

Haiyan: You should call the police for this kind of legal sanction.

Song: You should calm down.

Haiyan: I have to call the police. I told you that I can't cure you.

Song: You should calm down. Oh, my God, you are so stubborn. Calm down

Haiyan: You. Don't talk until it's useful, okay? Oh, my God (drawing a line)

Haiyan: What are you doing? What are you doing?

Song: What is this? This is evidence. Don't move yet. It's not over yet. Alas, mama, mama, take a selfie. Alas, mama, mama.

Haiyan: Tell you that you are a rogue. Do you know?

Song: You hid the car and let it out. Alas, mama, alas, mama, report it to the police. I'm not afraid to know if I have You're just a rogue. I'm telling you that the surveillance has been clearly photographed. Everything is under surveillance.

Song: It's useless. Oh, my God, I said, Oh, my God, my legs are sore. Oh, don't come over. Don't touch this line. Who crossed this line? I hit you? Did you hear me? I told you why I came here today? I checked the traffic post several kilometers away from Fiona Fang. The video head of this post is broken. I have evidence

I don't believe you when the I have to suspend your driver's license for seven days. Oh, my God.

Haiyan: OK, OK, I won't tell you. I'm in a hurry.

Song: Give money.

Haiyan: I can't help being a rogue like you.

Song: Give money.

Haiyan: Give it to Song: Where's the beggar? Too few

Haiyan: What do you mean?

Song: What do you mean, there are not enough money? Aren't there some good ones on your side?

Haiyan: I have several. It's my bad luck

Song: Take them. Don't waste time.

Haiyan: Give them to

Song: It's not enough.

Haiyan: You're a scoundrel

Song:. You are a typical scoundrel. You are insatiable. What else do you want?

Song: Do you have any cash you want?

Haiyan: What's wrong?

Song: Is there Haiyan: No

Song: It's not easy to handle. Oh, my God, I have a pos machine here. I can swipe my card. You can also write you an invoice. Hey, man, you can leave.

Go ahead, I think it's bad luck, I think it's bad luck, just go ahead. I have something urgent. How much do you want?

Song: It's easy to deal with something urgent. It's easy to deal with it if you have something to study with me. Let's calculate this expense at once. Look at it. mental damage compensation threatens to pay for medical expenses, meals, fees and fees. It's always * * * It's 1, yuan, so I'll give you a 5% discount. Haiyan: Don't push your luck.

Song: Why?

Haiyan: You almost have to know, right? Take 5, yuan.

Song: Yes, is there a good thing to hold? Is there a bracelet necklace or something?

Haiyan: Things are also ok. Sure

Haiyan: wait for something in my car.

Song: hurry up.

Haiyan: wait.

Song: hurry up. Oh, my gosh, it's a little high today. And ... Oh, my gosh, I'm blue and white.

Haiyan: Don't touch it.

Song: Old things.

Song: Sure.

Haiyan: Can I give it to you?

song: of course.

Haiyan: for

song: how much does this mean? It means a lot of money.

It's broken.

song: Oh, I

Haiyan: Hey, what are you doing?

Song: No, Haiyan: Don't move.

Song: What's the folding? Haiyan: Pay for it

Song: Oh, my master is in the folk

Haiyan: Pay for it

Song: Beautiful, beautiful, beautiful

Haiyan: This thing of mine is an old thing with a hundred thousand yuan

Song: I didn't use my hand to stroke us back

Haiyan: Where to stroke it

Song: Calculate what happened to this account. P > Song: Yes

Haiyan: I didn't get anything for you

Song: I got something

Haiyan: I didn't give it to you

Song: I gave it to me

Haiyan: You don't want it

Song: I asked for

Haiyan: Did you reach out and pick it up

? Yan: yes

Song: I'm better. Wow, I'm thankful that I'm prepared. I'm not prepared to ask you to correct me today. You've met the wrong person. What do you do with this whole thing?

Haiyan: What do you do?

Song: What is this porcelain touching me? I'm specialized in this thing. Do you know it or not? Let's check it. Now, let's just say this carcass. No, the lines on the glaze are not very uniform, and it's not very clear. Let's take a look at the inscription. Oh, I'm too hard to inscribe. Beijing welcomes you. Your door is always open. Oh, I'm too handsome as a souvenir.

Haiyan: Come on, get up, get up, get up, okay, get up. I think it's planted.

Song: You're wasting your time with me. You know, if you have money, you should give it quickly because you have Haiyan: I took it. I took it.

Song: I have nothing to do this day, do you know?

Haiyan: I have so much money in my pocket now, but I don't see anything, do I?

Song: It's enough. No

Haiyan: It's all for you.

Song: ok

Haiyan: That's all