Holder: Good evening, everyone! Welcome to the selection site of Ningcheng Super University. I'm Yin Ling, the host. What about our competitors? Mainly to examine the comprehensive quality of college students. Select the best players and award them the title of super college students. After layers of selection, we selected three candidates. Let's invite them to make their debut at Zhuangzi House (with Tang Bohu's music). ) strong. Room: Hello, everyone. We are Superboy Group.
Moderator: Wow, you are the legendary SB group. Everyone loves flowers, and the car has a flat tire. Welcome to visit.
Moderator; hello
Zhuang: Thank you, moderator.
Moderator: Hello.
House: The host is so handsome.
Moderator: Thank you.
The host is here, let's get started, everyone is very busy!
Zhuang: They are all celebrities.
CHAIRMAN: Sorry, there is still one member who is not present.
Zhuang: Who is so slow?
Music (with Tang Bohu's music. )
Wang: Hello, everyone. Wow, this host is awesome.
Moderator: Thank you.
Wang: Do you think I am handsome?
H: Eh. ...
W: No, no, don't answer. Your eyes have told me everything (deleted). Fang: Oh, you said you were shivering so much that you stood up and shocked people. Fang: Why do you think he is so shivering? Fang: I've never seen it so cold. Here comes the master. Let's get started. Wang: Where did all this come from? It's the same as the underworld Host: OK, from three o'clock.
The house stood up.
House: Hello, everyone. I'm number one. Many people know that I am from Ningbo, and there are many freshmen present. I want to say hello to you in Ningbo dialect: Nice to meet you!
Is it Ningbo dialect? I'm all set (take out the manuscript).
House: Ah! Ningcheng, Ningcheng is incredible, 6S runs well, handsome guys run more, beautiful women run more, the dining hall is full of food, the teaching concept is advanced, teachers are hard to find in the world, foreign countries are in a mess, blacks are the boss, swine flu is driven away, and Gaddafi comes out to harass. Looking at the world situation, this pimple is still the best. Thank you (a gesture) House: My uncle who died for many years called me yesterday and said,
Moderator: Please welcome contestant number two.
Zhuang: Hello, everyone. My name is Miao Zhuang. You can call me Lao Zhuang. At the age of three, I know thousands of words; at the age of five, I recite Tang poems; at the age of seven, I master four books and five classics; at the age of eight, I master poetry and songs. I can write a feast for the world, and I can get on the horse and practice martial arts. Beauty and wisdom coexist, the embodiment of hero and chivalry.
House: Oh, will you stop blowing? Do you think you are Lv Xiucai?
Zhuang: Don't make noise on the telephone poles. Today, I bring you a poem written by myself, and it is also a little advice for freshmen present here (Miao Zhuang takes out the manuscript). Zhuang: When you enter a university, you must remember that interpersonal relationships should be strong. If you don't cheat in the exam, you will definitely be a junior next year. Thank you.
Moderator: Please welcome contestant number three.
Wang: Hello, everyone. My stage name is bachelor, and my personal name is bachelor. Everyone says I'm handsome. Come on, you look like an old demon in Montenegro, and you are handsome. Wang: I'm so excited today. They all have poetry readings, and I am no exception. Let me recite a poem to express some feelings of my long life and study. Don't clap yet It is said that the exam is too tired, the disciples are miserable, sweating every day, and the result is gaunt, and the defeat is a mess, and the nightmare is sleepless. The topic of (a meal) will be different, but I am afraid that others will laugh. I want to ask the teacher for advice, and I am afraid of listening to the southern accent, so I have to cry in private and shout at the wall. Time flies. I want to study hard and unite my brothers and sisters to take the lead. I hope to have a good dream every day and wake up easily. Thank you! I don't scare my uncle like some people do. Who are you kidding? (Deleted) Master: OK, thank you! After the first round of wonderful self-introduction, I think everyone has got a preliminary understanding of them. Moderator: OK, then, after the first round of wonderful self-introduction, (delete) let's look at the support rate of Ningcheng Forum. At present, the first place in Ningcheng Forum is my bachelor classmate Wang: Thank you, thank you Lord: OK, I hope to continue my efforts.
Zhuang: Just him.
Room: just him, the host, he doesn't talk about super college students and even personal hygiene!
Zhuang: He doesn't wash his feet for a week.
Room: I don't take a shower all the year round.
Zhuang: There are cockroaches all over the bed.
(The house is ashamed)
Master: OK, now let's enter the last link of the competition-the life and death express. Zhuang: Why ... why is it still the life and death express? Wang: I am desperate.
Lord; The so-called life-and-death express is a short script that grabs answers.
Zhuang: Answer first, then answer, life and death express. It was really scary.
House: Gee, I'm always good at grasping answers.
Lord: As far as you are good at it.
House: Then Li Yong's Lucky 52 is looking for me.
Zhuang: Ah, sit, sit.
Wang: You are lucky to have an IQ of 52, aren't you?
Wang: Moderator, don't talk nonsense with him. Let's get on with it.
(deleted)
Master: OK, please listen to the first question. This is a historical question.
Remove the leaves of cabbage and hit a historical figure.
Wang: Liu Bang!
Wang: Remove the leaves from the cabbage, leaving the cabbage bangzi, Liu Bang.
Zhuang: I agree!
Room: What Liu Tie means the same thing. You two grew up drinking Sanlu milk powder, which is obvious, cabbage leaves, Liu Laogen and Liu Zhugen.
Zhuang: People are talking about historical figures. Liu Laogen is a historical figure, and he loves it very much.
Wang: Who taught all this?
The correct answer to this question is Liu Bang. (deleted)
The second question, this question is an action question. I'll do the action, and the contestants can guess what kind of campus sport (action) this is. Zhuang: Table tennis room: Table tennis, I wonder why your IQ is so low. Moderator, this is not obvious, it is a seat!
Master: How can it be a seat occupation?
Room: Oh, you don't know the host. Ah, that guy, I got up at six in the morning with a bunch of books tied. There is one seat, two seats, three seats, the second row, the third row and the fourth row when entering the class, and no seats are occupied. What is that?
Room: host
H: mm-hmm
F: Can I make a small request?
Lord; Well, you say
Room: Can you stop me from following two idiots PK? Too fall in price Wang: Who are you talking about? Master: Unfortunately, the correct answer to this question is table tennis.
Zhuang: Did you hear that, fool?
Wang; Did you hear that?
Room: There is a problem with the problem, but there is no such problem. Campus physical education
Compere: That depends on me and others. So far, our game is over. Our staff are counting the results of the game.
Let's take a break, advertising time.
F: Does anyone still call you naive?
Zhuang: Does anyone still call you naive?
Wang: Did anyone say that you don't grow up, Lulu milk powder?
Wang: Helping growth.
F: Actually, I'm only 12 years old!
Master: All right, audience, welcome back. This is the most exciting moment. I announce that the final winner of this year's super college students of Ningbo City University is ~ ~ "Zhuangzi". Let's invite the winners to give their acceptance speech. Please welcome.
Zhuang: I dreamed yesterday and won this prize. I didn't expect it to come true. First of all, I want to thank my parents, Ningbo City University and my classmates for giving me this opportunity. I am ready, too. Ah, Ningcheng, Ningcheng is incredible.
Oh, that's my manuscript.
Zhuang: I'm a little nervous. Sorry ~, that's right. Ah, today is a good day, autumn is coming, the autumn wind is pleasant, flowers are laughing, birds are calling, Ningcheng, my alma mater, handsome men and handsome women, dreaming of flying here. We grew up here, and life set sail here, sharpening a sword in three years. Ningcheng elites are brave in pioneering and practicing independence. Look at me, Ningcheng swagger, forge ahead, and create fine products. Look at me, Ningcheng is the most advanced city in China. Thank you!
Moderator: The future of the motherland is for us to build, and the miracle of life needs us to create. In fact, we are all super college students. Well, this year's Ningcheng Super College Student Selection Competition has come to a successful conclusion. Thank you for your participation. Please leave.
College Students' Sketch Script (2)
Zhang (golden partner)
Show: Bring them back.
(Behind the scenes. The phone rings)
C: Who is it? (dialect)
B: speak mandarin! (in an angry tone)
Oh, I love you ...
B: hmm ~
C: What's the matter?
B: I'm going to eat ~ ~ (I changed my tune, and now I'm sad ~) C: Ah ~ But I've ordered takeout … B: You're not still in the Internet cafe, are you? ! It's been two days and two nights (very fierce) C: Honey, next time! I will accompany you next time!
B: You said it several times next time! No, no. You must accompany me this time!
Honey, next time, I love you. (The tone is very dull) (Hang up the phone and B begins to appear) B: Hello! Hey! I hate ... alas ... beautiful women have to eat alone again ... boring ... what are you laughing at? Oh, everyone said, the most important compulsory course in college is falling in love. Although my love came a little late, I am already very satisfied! Maybe he is the wolf in sheep's clothing, and I am the little sheep ~ Hee hee (snickering) "Mian Yang is in love with the wolf, madly in love with ..." (A removes the table)
Jin Dian! Zhang!
B: Hey! who is it? Coming!
Ah, it's Xiao Bo!
(starts to help A move the table)
I saw you from far away!
B: Ah! Your eyes are so good? !
A: Not that I have a good eye. Just your figure, China Southern Airlines …
(b Put the table down, it's fierce)
B: Why? ! (Strong tone)
A: I mean, no one in China Southern Airlines is in better shape than you! Slim and graceful! (Actually, B is a chubby girl) B: Hehe … No … I'm flattered … Where are you moving to?
A: Hmm! Right here! Right here! A canteen door!
Thank you!
Hello! You are welcome! We are classmates and our friendship is still so good!
A: Hey! A little more! I heard that you have been in love recently?
News travels fast, huh? ... these paparazzi ... actually ... A: What? Someone really likes you?
What do you mean? !
No, I mean, it's a man, right?
Yeah, hey, aren't you talking nonsense? ! (grabs A's clothes and wants to hit him) A: No, no, look at my mouth! That's not what I meant. I mean, that man must be ugly, right?
Brave you! (Roll up your sleeves)
A: No, no, why does my mouth always tell the truth today … No, no! B: Come on, come on, don't explain, I know, you are pure jealousy ~ (contempt) A: Right, right, right! I am jealous!
I'm afraid you'll lose a better man around you ... (patting your chest, implying that it's yourself) B: Just you? ! Hmm ~ If you were the only man in the world ... A: You chose me?
B: I'll just ... agree Sex! Love!
A: Am I that bad ...
If I hadn't worked with you for so many years, I wouldn't have any feelings for you!
~
(A looks aggrieved, B looks proud and sits in the chair) B: I tell you, our wolf loves me very much!
How can I love you? I want to hear it. (curious)
B: Every time a wolf eats, he always eats the meat in the bowl first. This is good for you!
B: the wolf said it would be more beautiful if I were thinner ~ hee hee …
He thinks you are fat ... Did he say he loves you?
Can't you see? No vision ~ Our wolf said that I feel safe at home ~ A: Hmm … Even mosquitoes are afraid to go in … (whispering) B: Our wolf also said …
A: All right, all right, stop!
B: What's the matter?
Is this love for you?
He said he loved me ... (sitting in a chair)
A: Then why didn't he accompany you today?
He is very busy (as if nothing had happened).
A: No matter what happens, you must accompany us to dinner!
He's busy! Why are you so talkative! (Already impatient) A: No, no, no! If I were him, no matter how busy I am, I would like to have dinner with my family!
He's busy! (while striking the table, he stood up. When A saw this scene, he was startled! Forget it! Get angry when you mention it! (Action: Tujia) I thought he loved me, but what happened? I haven't had dinner with me since I bought the computer last month! (when you say "again", your finger points to A's head) Ah! What? What? I'm not as good as a computer now? I am ... actually ... I am so angry! (I grabbed my family's hair with my hand, but I didn't catch it, but I raised my hand and hit him. I thought it was wrong, so I tapped my nails. A has been shaking with fear and has a frightened expression. A: Then what is he busy with ... (trembling voice)
What are you playing ... Warcraft.
A: No wonder … watching Warcraft is better than watching you … (whispering)
B: I often play all night! I don't even have classes! Often by informed criticism!
A: Huh? Oh, no, isn't our school electronically controlled and lights out at eleven o'clock?
B: That forced him to steal this article and learn from www.gkstk.com, the largest college entrance examination resource network in China ... A: Stealing electricity? Keep your voice down … there are many leaders sitting here … B: I tell you … he can be a half electrician now! (whispering) A: Hey, I learned more skills.
B: But that's all right. When we get married, those TV sets, refrigerators, flashlights and batteries don't need to be repaired, and we will have a lot of money left! (Sweet talk) A: You've been thinking about it for a long time ... Oh, be careful. This is no good. You have to take care of him!
To tell the truth, I called all the places where I should call, but it was useless. Sometimes he doesn't answer my phone! You are avoiding me! Hey, you say it! Am I that scary? !
A: Hehehehehehehehehe ... that ... but after all, your relationship now is unusual. You have to give him a hand when necessary, give him a hand.
B: Hmm! Ok, ok, don't talk about him, but it seems that we really need to increase the crackdown in the future! (Very calm tone, feeling normal) A: It's over … The baby is over … Alas …
Come on, help me hand out flyers.
B: Leaflets? What flyer?
Didn't our school hold a mental health week recently? Our art department is going to take this opportunity to hold a "wisdom class" for the whole school.
B: wisdom?
A: Yes, this inspiration comes from a post on the Internet.
B: What position?
What have I learned in my four years in college?
B: There are so many things to learn!
A: But there are only seven words on it.
B: Seven words? !
A: Well, it says-smoking, surfing the Internet, falling in love.
B: Huh? But ... it's also very common in universities ... A: It's very common, because we didn't think about it at that time.
B: Thinking?
Do you remember what it was like when we first entered the university?
B: That's ... exciting! Excited! ! Full of ideals! ! !
A: think about the eyes our parents gave us at that time ... this is an expectation! A kind of pride!
(b nods together)
A: But what about four years later? We spent our parents' hard-earned money and got only "smoking, surfing the Internet and falling in love". How sad is it?
B: I ... didn't think so much. ...
A: That's why I was shocked.
B: ...
A: Actually, there is nothing wrong with these questions, just because we have not considered them. We didn't use our wisdom to deal with these things.
B: Wisdom?
A: Yes, let's talk about you.
Me? What's wrong with me? ...
A: It's normal to fall in love in college.
Yes, everyone talks about it …
But have you thought it over? This is not only an emotion, but also a responsibility. If handled well, it will become the driving force for each other to move forward. If it is not handled well, it will become the resistance of the other party. Then what do we rely on to control this degree?
B: Wisdom? !
A: That's right! Brilliant!
What about surfing the internet?
A: The same is true for surfing the Internet. As a college student in 2 1 century, it is impossible not to contact the internet. But how can we control ourselves in this high IQ virtual world?
B: Then you need wisdom even more!
You are absolutely right! This is our great wisdom!
B: Hmm! Time waits for no one! Four years in college is very precious! We should study hard in this short time! Save strength for us to step into the society in the future! Also for our future employment, do the best preparation!
A: Yes! This is our wise choice! We are called people because we have wisdom!
B: We become college students because we are full of wisdom!
A: Good! So let's start the highest wisdom together now!
B: the highest wisdom?
Answer: Because we are descendants of the dragon!
B: Great! Pat your nails hard with your hands! A: Can you be gentle? ..... (rolled sleeves and bright red handprints) B: Huh? This is my handprint ... (said in a distressed tone, suddenly changed) How sexy! How beautiful!
A: Huh?
B: Ha ha. Ok, I'll send you flyers!
(jumping off the stage)
A: Huh? A little? !
(Stand up, raise your hand)
B: Still alive ... (whispering)
A: Be careful! You are a soldier! (posture)
(b) Imitate Song Dandan under the stage)
B: The rooster that lays eggs, the fighter in the rooster! Oh yeah! ~
(Send the leaflet to the judge and teacher, and A complains on it)
B: Please support Great Wisdom?
As soon as he heard this sentence on the stage, he began ...
A: Friends are here! How about some applause? Thank you, thank you friends here! ..... (as if he were singing) B: Sick again ... (rushes to the stage and pats him) Why? We are playing a sitcom! It's almost over
A: Oh, oh! I forgot the sketch script.
(Two people turn their backs together, arm in arm)
A: Great wisdom.
I think so.
(Change the action and point to the front of the other person)
He: Who knows!
(Change the action again)
Oh, yes
thank you
(Step down)
College Students' Sketch Script (3)
Time: the night before graduation Location: a corner of the campus.
People: brothers a and b, and sister C.
[The curtain rises: a corner of the campus. Brothers a and b are very different. A is very tall and B is very short.
[Teacher A holds a rose and laughs a few times.
A: (looking at the flowers carefully) Yes, this is the rose. (Singing) I have planted 999 roses for you.
B: (accidentally hit it. A) Oh, you don't have eyes?
A: (angry) Hey, you-(happy) Oh, it's you. What are you doing here in such a hurry?
B: (Laughter) Sorry, I don't have time to explain it to you now, but there will be a campus version of Titanic later, and I am the protagonist, so in order not to stimulate you, you'd better go back first.
A: What a coincidence! I'm also going to star in a touching romantic movie here. I think you'd better go back first, so as not to vomit blood after reading it. (Looking at his watch) Sorry, you should go. Sister c is here.
B: Why? Hey, kid, you have to be clear. What's your relationship with Senior C?
A: You can date at night. Do you need to explain anything? Our relationship is unusual between men and women.
B: (sneers) You are so cheeky and affectionate. Don't check what you are.
Hey, kid, are you jealous?
B: Well, I'm afraid you'll be sad if I say it, but I'm embarrassed if I don't say it. It's really hard to be a man! To tell you the truth, Sister C cares about me very much. Look at you, half a man instead of a woman.
(Yu Chao) You are crying, Dad! (China) What does this mean? Do you want to win love in a horizontal knife?
You're overreaching yourself.
A: I overreach myself. (Helpless) Well, you said she cared about you, didn't you? What evidence do you have?
Well, there is a lot to talk about.
I'm not afraid of you talking too much. I'm afraid you won't talk.
B: I'm afraid you will be jealous.
A: I will never be jealous.
I'm afraid you miss me.
I never hated you.
I'm afraid you don't believe me.
I never trusted you.
B: Huh?
No, I absolutely believe you.
I'll tell you then.
A: Go ahead.
I really did it.
A: Say it!
B: ok, I'll say. (pause) No, you have to swear, or I'm still a little worried.
You have a lot to do. (Raise your hand) Well, heaven is above, and boy A is below. I will never be jealous or hate him after listening to his words, otherwise ... otherwise, the laggards will suffer. Is that enough?
B: That's enough. I tell you, several times, I went to fetch water, and a dozen is six bottles. Big sister saw it and helped me carry it with distress. Several times, when the weather turned cold, she called me in the dormitory and said, B, it's cold, put on more clothes and don't catch cold-oh! "A few times we went to the canteen to eat together. Seeing that I ate less, he encouraged me to say, "Be brave and eat more. "Also give me her meat to eat?
A: What? And she gave you her meat?
No, no, no, this is the pork she gave me. And when she lent me the book for the self-study exam, she also put a letter in it, which said, "Dear-"A: Ah!
B: "Dear brother, I wish you success." Wow! How sweet!
A: Haha, is this also called caring?
B: Besides helping you, how can she help me carry water?
A: She thinks you are small and pathetic!
B: Why else would she want me to eat more instead of you?
A: That's because she's afraid you'll waste national food.
B: Why else would she lend me the book instead of you?
A: She thinks your family is poor and can't afford it. Let me tell you something about my vigorous love story with her.
B: Well, I'd like to see what that enemy did behind my back.
Well, listen, I was in a bad mood that day. She came to comfort me and talked with me for a long time. She often comes to our classroom to study, and she also gives me electricity from time to time. The most touching thing is that I went to play football the day before yesterday and accidentally fell down. Seeing the flying sky, my elder sister ran to help me up and asked with concern, "What happened? Does it hurt? " (intoxicated) God, how romantic!
B: "What happened? Does it hurt? " I tell you, I even shook her hand!
I even touched her leg. Too careless (for the audience).
B: Ah! No, she cares about me.
No, she cares about me. Look at me. I am tall and strong, with a hunchback.
Look at me. I'm short and smart.
I've done a lot for her.
I paid more for her. When she caught a cold, I bought her Sanjiu Ganmao Granules.
I gave her stomach medicine when she had diarrhea.
Her schoolbag is a gift.
I gave her a pocket watch.
I gave her happiness.
A: I gave you happiness again, so her happiness is still mine.
B: (angry) Really ... Are you ... Are you still my good friend?
A: Don't be sad, although you can't compare with me. () But there is no need to feel inferior. In my opinion, friends are much more important than love. Although she doesn't like you, I will give her to you.
B: (excited) I'm so touched. No, I can't break you up, although she doesn't like being with you very much.
A: Well, my brother, what are you welcome? She mentioned you to me several times.
What did she say?
A: She said that she knew that you had a crush on her, but she didn't know how to refuse you. Because she was afraid that you would be sad, she took it hard and committed suicide.
No, she likes you.
How did you know?
Listen to her.
What did she say?
She said that she likes you.
Really, that would be great.
She said she liked me, too.
A: Ah! Boy, we've been teased!
B: (thinking) Yes, my mother, we were cheated. She has two feet on both sides.
Yes, let's go get even with her. (With B, C comes out)
C: Hi, how do you do?
Which two?
C: Hello, two handsome guys!
B: What handsome guy?
You're just in time!
B: We have something to ask you.
C: Why? Awesome!
Let me ask you something. Why did you cheat us?
Yes, why do you tease us two simple boys?
C: What do you mean?
What do you mean? You know it yourself.
B: (sad) Sister, I didn't expect you to be such an immoral person, despicable!
A: Yes, immoral and despicable!
C: I am immoral. I am mean?
A: Yes!
B: That's right.
C: I think you have misunderstood. We are classmates.
A: (angry) Who is your classmate?
We are friends.
B: (angry) Do you still have me as a friend in your heart?
We should help each other and care about each other. Not all male-female relationships can only have love, but friendship can also exist. I am your senior. I should care about you and help you.
What, you're not going to develop that relationship with me?
Aren't you interested in me?
【 "Have a nice trip" accompanied by music.
C: (affectionate) Where have you all been? We will graduate soon, and I will leave tomorrow. We remained good friends after I left. Please contact more when you are free. Come on, you come here.
[A and B walk slowly.
C: (takes out a book to A)A, this book is for you. You were going to buy it. Come on, take it as a souvenir.
[a hands took it, bowed his head and stroked the handwriting.
C: (takes out a pen, right) B, this pen is for you. You once borrowed it from me and praised it for being easy to write. I know you like calligraphy very much. Take it and practice more.
Cross your hands and keep your head down.
[The bell rings.
C: Brother, I should go. Goodbye! (Walk away slowly) A: (At the same time) Goodbye, senior!
B: (seeing C take a few steps) Sister, remember us.
C's voice-over: Yes.
[The lights are fading and the music is fading.