Humorous jokes and hilarious short sentences

Humor jokes, hilarious short sentences (52 selected sentences) 1. I always feel that my personality is not suitable for work, but only for getting paid. I'm not fat, it's swelling caused by my allergy to life. Every time I face delicious food, I tell myself: I will die if I eat too much. ? But it turns out that I'm not afraid of death at all. In today's society, it is useless to cook raw rice into cooked rice. Even if it turns into popcorn, the runner will still run. Every time I write my homework late, there are always two little people in my mind. One said forget it, stop writing, and the other said yes. 6. In such a cold day, in such a cold day, single dog may be upgraded to be covered with ice and ice. 7. The name of a single man is single dog, and the name of a single woman is Goubuli. 8. You'd better show your love at noon. Do you know why? Because sooner or later there will be retribution. 9. I'm afraid I'll scare you when I say it. I also have a background and can run two programs. 10. I'm not the kind of cute person who spends fifty dollars and has to think about it for a long time. I have to think about five dollars now. 1 1. If you can't stop losing weight this winter, you will have a very foreign English name, Fred? Is it round or not? 12. The best thing in the world is eating meat. Never betray, never cheat, eat a catty, grow a catty, and always treat each other sincerely. 13. Don't doubt the girlfriend you admire. Anyone in idolatry can do anything for you, so enjoy it. 14. Someone just called me shameless. My backhand is a slap. Would I want such a beautiful face? 15. If you think I've become a regular swearing at you from time to time, congratulations, we know each other very well. 16. Good friends are like this. I'll give you a hand when you fall, but only after I finish laughing. 17. Me Before You I am very pure. I was extremely lustful after meeting you, but I don't regret knowing you. 18. Being single is not difficult, but it is difficult to deal with those who try their best to make you end being single, such as your seven aunts and eight aunts. 19. Actually, I used to have eight abdominal muscles, but when I practiced the ninth one, I became obsessed. 20. For a person who looks like a failure, looking in the mirror is equivalent to watching a ghost film. 2 1. Chatting is because I like chatting with you. If you don't like it, you can talk to death in minutes. 22. If I don't marry in ten years and you don't marry, then we are really miserable, really miserable. 23. People say that you are mentally ill, but I disagree, because you are mentally ill, you must first have a brain. 24. I played with mosquitoes all night yesterday and was finally tied. It's not full, and I haven't slept well. 25. If someone asks you how you got fat, you can say you forgot. Don't explain, the more you explain, the more sad you get. 26. A man just sat next to me. I used to slap my face. How can you squeeze into my invisible wings! 27. You must scold me, because you don't know me well enough, because everyone who knows me wants to hit me. In today's society, it is useless to cook raw rice into mature rice. Even if it turns into popcorn, the runner will still run. 29. It's windy outside today, and I'm scared. If everyone else is blown away, I can't. That's a real pity. 30. Look in the mirror at night and see your snow-white body. Sigh: Good cabbage! Why can't I find a pig? 3 1. At home, I still insist on surfing the Internet when I have a fever, and sneezing at school thought it was terminal cancer. 32.。 In fact, when I was a child, I was thin and not fat at all, but what happened later? No leftovers? Ruined my life. 33. Learn to bask in the results, the goddess takes selfies, the local tyrants bask in money, and the model basks in the body, but he can only bask in it! 34. I advise you all to play less with your mobile phones and computers. I feel that my eyesight is getting worse and worse recently, and I can't see the money when I open my wallet. Only when you are covered with thorns will others take care of your feelings. You are so soft that everyone wants to rub it. How comfortable. 36. You are only twenty years old. It is normal not to meet someone you like. The later you find out, it's probably impossible to meet. 37. My parents really think I'm lazy and don't like going out. If I have money, you can't even meet my people. 38. If you are ugly, you should study hard. Don't be useless like me. You can only eat and drink by your handsome appearance. When we were young, we were all very happy, because at that time, our ugliness and poverty were not so obvious. 40. When children are sad, they are happy when they are coaxed verbally, but adults are unhappy, especially women, who have to eat a good meal or buy something. 4 1. Time tells me that the era of unreasonable troubles is over, and it's time to enjoy happiness: face the explosion! 42. I have three brothers, one is Dongyan, the other is Xizui and the other is Naner. What is my name, please? 43. To take a step back is not to talk about the broad sky, but to push your nose and face. 44. say? Oh, dear! ? Is a lovely girl, say? Ah, ah, ah, ah, ah, ah! ? It's Fan Wei. 45. Add the following: Say? Hey hey? Is a lovely girl, say? Ni Ni Ni Ni Ni Ni? It is a fly. 46. In fact, real rich people are very low-key, and their appearance is invisible. Take me for example. Although I often ride a broken bike to the streets, who would know that I have an electric car at home? 47. Young people should not bow their heads whenever they encounter difficulties, but kneel down. Don't always think that you have accomplished nothing now, and it will be worse in the future. 48. When love comes to an end, the weak cry and look for the next goal efficiently, and the smart one has already prepared the next one in advance. 49. Who said that? Don't forget, there will be repercussions? The person I like never talks to me, and the idea of getting rich overnight has never come true. When you are lovelorn, many young people think that the whole world has abandoned themselves. Don't be silly, the world doesn't need you at all. 5 1. I thought it was impossible to raise a woman, but I can raise a man. Then I found that men were expensive, and finally I found that I couldn't afford a dog. 52. I was asked how to live alone in this society with constant material flow, and I answered a sentence? Poor? .