Since I became a friend, I have continued the habit of studying at school, and I borrow two or three books from the library every month. Reading can help me learn what I can't learn in class, talk to wise and great people, and learn about distant places that I may never have a chance to go. It also helps me to know more about the problems and puzzles I have encountered in my actual work and life, and find the answers. Just recently, I read a book "Take Time as a Friend" written by Li Xiaolai.
This book mainly talks about time management from the perspective of mental growth, pointing out that time management is the key to success. It tells us how to open our minds, make friends with thinking and time, make a breakthrough in time management, and then start our own successful journey in life with thinking.
The so-called mind is actually the expression of a person's comprehensive quality, which is different from the all-round development of morality, intelligence, physique, beauty and labor that we are required to achieve since childhood under the traditional education system. The mind is embodied in planning ability, thinking ability, practical ability, good habits and patience. In the author's opinion, patience is one of the core qualities that make people successful. Without patience, if you fail and don't want to take the time to sum up experience and try again and again, then you will be farther and farther away from success.
Our generation, born in 1980s, grew up in the era of reform and opening-up and the rapid development of material civilization, and suffered a lot less than their predecessors. But once we leave the ivory tower, we are soon surrounded by the pronouns of success, such as houses, cars, status and rights, which are generally recognized by the public. However, the cruelty of reality makes most of us bear heavy pressure and gradually lose ourselves. We only emphasize hard work and struggle, but seldom think about our life goals.
And all the problems are rooted in time. People with weak minds regard time as an enemy, while people with developed minds regard time as a friend. He prepared earlier, knew what he wanted from the beginning, then planned step by step, formed good habits and redoubled his efforts, because he had already seen the results. It is only a natural habit to redouble your efforts, and success will get closer and closer. Just like Tagore's favorite poem: the best doesn't come, it comes with everything. The best will never come alone, but it will be accompanied by other surprises.
Think of time as a friend. There are only two things that change the fate of life: one is the book you read, and the other is the person you meet. -inscription
I opened this book at first because my classmates were eager to recommend it. He is also a teacher. You really should read it. Very good. The author of this book, Li Xiaolai, a senior teacher of New Oriental, has a little doubt and expectation, expecting this teacher to give me spiritual help. I opened it.
After reading the title, I know that this is to teach people how to manage their time. I have seen a lot before, but the effect is not great. After a while, even the author of the topic can't remember. At first, I was very skeptical about this book. I really don't seem to have any practical concept about time management. I'm used to being led by the nose, and I'm muddled and ordinary, and I have a smooth journey. For those who have been shining, they have always felt out of reach. In order to succeed, they must pay a high price. Some things are left undone, and today they are all gone. This book opens a puzzle that has been lingering in my heart for a long time. Everything is done. Why do I have to live in an ordinary world when others shine? The focus of the problem is not time, but ourselves. The object of management is not time, but ourselves. From this moment on, I will change, from the dilemma of being chased by time and shouting all day to trying to calm my mind and treat time as a friend. It is too simple to say that this book only talks about time management. He taught me more about the importance of self-management. How one thinks and does things is closely related to the maturity of one's mind. The embarrassing situation of making plans every day but not finishing them every day is a portrayal of my previous life. This book is not only about how to plan and manage time, but also about the concept of time and how to reflect on time. The brain's function of forgetting pain suddenly dawned on me. I have been confused for many years, and I understand that every time I argue with others and want to give some painful examples, I can't succeed. Another point of view: the thoughts of the brain and their own thoughts are always opposite. My own thoughts are rational and positive, but the thoughts in my brain are physical, passive and lazy. When I distinguish between the thoughts of my brain and my own thoughts, I deeply feel that reason can be defeated when I struggle with different thoughts in my mind. The author not only reasoned with us, but also supplemented with a lot of personal experience, which is very credible and convincing, and provided us with the methods he used and verified for reference.
In the spring and summer of 20 13, in the sad and beautiful graduation season, my impetuous heart calmed down, and there was not much to do, but I had time to enrich my spiritual space. Sitting in the library with a cup of tea and turning over the pages, I was a little annoyed that I read this book too late. I like a sentence in it. It seems that I made an excuse for being lazy for so many years before, and some truths were suddenly awakened. Until then, it will take time. Anyway, I have read the book and learned the truth, but the most important thing is action. Not afraid of slowness, but afraid of standing. As the book says: change from this moment, the sooner you wake up, the better.
Think of time as a friend. Whether a hungry baby or a dying old man, time is equal for everyone. Whether you are in a hurry or not, it is there, fast or slow. If we want to make rational use of time and not waste it, we must manage it effectively. When I was a student, I read and listened to some books and lectures on time management, but these were often skills-oriented, with poor results and difficult to adhere to. Recently, I read Li Xiaolai's Take Time to Be Friends. This book subverts some of my deep-rooted ideas and has a thought-provoking feeling.
First of all, this book emphasizes a kind of conceptual thinking. A person's mind refers to the sum of his various thinking abilities. And time management is a process of using the mind to get liberation. People can't manage time, and time is not subject to anyone's management. It passed as usual. Managing time is just wishful thinking. In other words, what human beings can do is to invent tools to improve time measurement, and there is no way to control it. Now is not the time to manage, but yourself. The luck of life lies in being able to do the right thing in the right way. And what is the right or better way, what is really worth doing, needs to cultivate a good mind to make as accurate a judgment as possible.
Mind is different from IQ. A person with a high IQ can be described as smart. However, when a person's mental ability is very strong, we often use another word to describe wisdom. People with strong mental ability can use their brains to control things that many people can't: control their emotions and even control their brains. The brain is not me. The brain is a naughty and fragile child. I want to take care of him. My brain always wants to play and watch TV in the refrigerator. When you encounter a problem, it also tells you to put it off. You should learn to control it. With the improvement of thinking, we can use pen and paper and GTD management software to record time expenditure, make time budget and use lists to reduce mistakes.
The mind is the soul, the thought, and time management is only the method. My previous time management was ineffective because I paid too much attention to methods and neglected the improvement of my psychological ability. Although many plans have been made, their execution is not strong. In order to broaden our horizons, we need to acquire more knowledge. And the most basic means for all people to acquire knowledge is experience. A little more advanced than experience means to acquire knowledge, just
This is trial and error. Accurately speaking, correct thinking is the main means to acquire real knowledge. In addition, we need to get rid of the limitations of experience, improve self-study ability, treat teachers correctly, cultivate memory patiently, and finally, change our world by changing our attitude.
For me, one of the great gains after watching Time as a Friend is that I began to record what I do every day. Now, I will be very sensitive to the expenses of working hours, and I will diagnose and reflect on my time management regularly. Some points to pay attention to when making time budget:
1, list all things to do.
2, which is lighter or heavier, the most important thing is in the first place.
Step 3 arrange time. Try to relax. Someone will always be late for the meeting, someone will suddenly ask you something, and there will always be traffic jams.
4. Arrange time for entertainment. It must be admitted that it is human nature to demand immediate satisfaction of desires. So in the time budget, set aside time for rest and play. If you arrange yourself too diligently, you are more likely to fail.
In short, to arrange work, life and study in an orderly way is to be your own friend, amuse yourself, coax yourself to relax, talk about everything with your heart, and inspire yourself to live a more exciting life. Work 24 hours a day, about 8 hours, eat and rest for about 4 hours, and what you do for the remaining 12 hours determines what kind of person you are. Time is not described by the dimension of length, but by depth, width and height.
In addition, the book mentions such a point in many places: patience, patience, or patience. Studying and working are hard, and the road is long, and it is not possible to produce results overnight. The fourth chapter of the book mentions Roger Horchow, a Dallas businessman, who remembers the 1600 names and related information in The tipping point. How can he do it if he doesn't use some methods and patience? Hard work is not as difficult as the legend. Just concentrate on studying and working for at least 6 hours every day, but patience is far greater than most people think. Accompanying practice takes at least 5 years and 20 years. Anything worth doing is worth doing slowly and for a long time. The core quality of success is patience. It is no exaggeration to say that how patient a person is, how high his chances of success are.
Patience is the courage to put time into simple, boring but ultimately meaningful repetition. To do calculus problems, I don't intend to do 100 every day, and I will finish it in one month. Instead, I will do a dozen or twenty courses every day, use them well and remember them well. To lose weight is not to lose 20 pounds by drinking slimming tea or doing exercise for one month, but to keep exercising for many years and have a regular diet. Similarly, managing time is not sleepless, but learning to record your time expenses, make plans, improve efficiency and allocate time reasonably.
The same is true at work. In order to complete each task well, patience and persistence are needed. This patience and persistence is not a simple repetition, but an attempt. Observation > adjustment > in the process of trying to cycle, we should patiently analyze, find out effective methods and persevere patiently to achieve the goal. For me, patience and persistence are reflected in the ideas and details of every drawing design, in the careful writing of every tender, and in the enthusiasm and meticulousness of every customer. Patience is the core quality of success. Take every step and believe that you will be one step closer to your goal.
I haven't read such a book on time management for a long time. There are many books of this type on the market. I have read too many books, so I need to make a timetable for myself every time. Because you read too many books, you can't make them for yourself at all. For a long time, everyone thought he was a man with a plan. Before starting a job or a thing, he will think a lot, not just twice, maybe all of it. Later, the world changed so fast that life was full of accidents. Finally, I found that my plans were always interrupted unconsciously, so I gave up many long-term plans. Later, I experienced too many things and found myself trapped by the plan, so I began to enjoy a life without a plan. Although sometimes I still feel that I am wasting my time and that I am crazy, I have gained some happiness and relaxation. After all, I haven't completely indulged myself, and I'm still making a little progress every day.
After reading a third of this book, I can't say that the cottage is open, but it is also suddenly enlightened. After all, it is also the personal experience of a cow in New Oriental. Some of them are really practical, and even talk about some bad habits that we don't want to admit, but we will see in everyone. There are always books that look very high on the shelves of the best-seller list in bookstores. Most books are bored by millions of people and tasteless. At that time, I couldn't find any words to describe the language style of this book, teasing? Humor? Anyway, it will make you accept his advice very humbly and seriously.
The following are some good sentences extracted.
"If there are no more than seven projects, we can do it in our brains."
"We are not planning to fail, but planning to fail."
"People who have experienced more failures have more experience, so they make fewer mistakes."
"Long-term planning is an ability that needs to be learned through practice." After all, I understand this truth. It is also an ability to make a long-term plan and stick to practice to complete it. Now I have no ability to make such a plan. Laughing children's shoes quoted Cui Jian as saying, "Plans never change quickly." It should also be an advertisement of ibm, and the second half sentence should be "so write the change into the plan." Up to now, I can't remember who told me this sentence at that time. But no matter how fast and how many changes there are, there must always be a plan. Some plans, such as sports and running, can be understood in one sentence without setting a deadline. For a lifetime or a few days, you can do it after thinking about it.
"A plan without action is certainly meaningless."
"Many times, there are two reasons why we don't need to make plans: in addition to the above-mentioned' most plans are actually very simple', the other is that' in the initial state, we are often unable to make reasonable and effective plans. "
"If you want to change yourself, or your current situation is not satisfactory, then everything is simple-find an action that you think should bring you change, and then do it. Don't be afraid of hitting the wall, don't be afraid of failure, it is a process that must be experienced. "
"Many people keep' learning' because they have no goals." That is me. Because of the fear of the future and the lack of security, I don't think I can waste time and sit still until I set my goal. So I kept studying and finally forgot to specify a real target book. I must read it by myself, and I must make a summary of the book by myself. Because many times our brain's "selective input" mechanism controls us to listen to what we like to hear, see what we like and write what we like to write.
At the age of 26, I accidentally found that I couldn't think. Today, I am 26 years old. I knew as early as last year that I couldn't think. I have been struggling until now, and now I find my spiritual world seems extremely empty.
"In fact, even if there is a sentence in a book that brings us surprises, thoughts and changes, it is already worth the book price. Therefore, sometimes, we should pay attention to our mentality. " I have been wandering between buying books and not buying books these days. It's not a new book now. Generally, you can find the electronic version in verycd, which is more economical. For many unemployed young people like me who have no products. The book I am reading now is still an electronic version, and I have hesitated for a long time. But books have the advantages of books. It is also convenient to hold, watch, remember and wander around. ......
"Whether Edison is a particularly hard-working person has nothing to do with us in essence. We should work hard and can't give up our efforts just because others don't work hard. "
"Mentally healthy people should not only have the ability to see the real world clearly, but also have enough ability to perceive the true self."
After seeing it, I found that the children's shoes have the same view on the inspirational book as me: "There is definitely nothing wrong with the inspirational book, because people just need encouragement, but they can't talk nonsense. With the growth of my age, I hate many inspirational books more and more, and even think that many times "success masters" are equivalent to "charlatans". In a sense, they are worse than charlatans, because liars only cheat you out of something in the end. If you are smart, you may not be cheated, or even if you are cheated, you can find ways to make up for the loss. "
"In other words, although luck does exist, I can't believe it, or I can't believe that luck has something to do with me at all."
"The wisdom of life is to concentrate on changing what can be changed and ignore what cannot be changed temporarily. It is more important than anything to concentrate on building yourself and make yourself an excellent person, a useful person and an independent person. " Some parts of this sentence seem to have been seen somewhere and seem familiar.
"Remember, a person's happiness often depends on how much he can get rid of dependence on the outside world."
"In fact, I bet you can't concentrate on what you don't like in two hours without training-because no one can do it without training. You can refer to the so-called time division method. For example, you need to focus on this matter for 2 hours, which is 120 minutes. Then you have to break down the task of the day into six pieces, and each piece will take 20 minutes to complete. You take 20 minutes as the basic time unit of your attention. After each time unit, take a 5-minute break and try to treat yourself-have a cup of coffee or milk, smoke a cigarette if you are not afraid of health problems, or call your boyfriend or girlfriend to say something disgusting ... At the last minute of the 5-minute break, cheer up, try to recover, and then move on to the next basic. Therefore, when you plan your time, you should understand that if you want to completely concentrate on 120 minutes, you will eventually need to plan the time expenditure of 150 minutes. This method is simple, but very effective. "
"The correct way to lose fat should be jogging. Jogging to the point where you can't breathe, change to brisk walking, and then change to jogging when the air is even. This is easy to persist for 30 minutes, and then, in the next 10~ 15 minutes, if physical strength allows (usually after one or two months of adaptation), try to run as fast as possible, or at least the intensity is higher than the previous 30 minutes, so as to consume more fat. " I ran more than 2: 00 kilometers for only half an hour, and then I got it. At that time, aerobic activity had just begun, but I had already finished it. The dance carpet can jump 1 hour, sweating all over, but not panting, and the heartbeat should not reach 130 per minute.
"Patience means that you are willing to devote your time to simple and boring repetition, which will eventually make sense."
"Understanding itself also requires patience. People who have no patience have no patience to understand anything deeply, so they have no patience for anything in the end. " I woke up at seven this morning and turned on the computer to read this book. I see it's almost four o'clock now, and I've finally finished reading it. It takes two or three hours to eat, sleep, go to the toilet, wash your face and take medicine. It will take about six or seven hours to read the remaining 160 pages today. I didn't expect to read so slowly. I said I would make a list for myself before, but I never forgot. I've been doing the things on the list.
I saw something halfway and suspected that Li Xiaolai's children's shoes should be Aquarius. I searched online for his date of birth, but unfortunately I couldn't find it. His speech and explanation of one thing always give me a familiar feeling, as if, for example, in an interview, the interviewer asked, "What is one plus one?" Then the children's shoes interviewed said, "Generally speaking, it is equal to two. But if we say, sometimes it is equal to one, such as a pile of sand plus another pile of sand or a pile of sand; Sometimes it is equal to three. For example, a man, a girl and a child are three. In fact, the most important thing is that the boss says it is equal to a few. " After reading this book, I feel about Li Xiaolai just like the children's shoes interviewed, and I will say countless reasons, hehe, as if I were arguing with you.
All in all, in a word, this book is very good. I gave him five stars. Not that I think so. The book was reprinted eight times in just two years.
Think of time as a friend. After reading this book, I have a lot of feelings: First of all, "treating time as a friend" in this book is completely different from the title. This book does not let us manage time, but let us learn to manage ourselves.
Because time doesn't depend on people's will, people can only change themselves. Because "time" exists objectively in this world, we can give full play to our subjective initiative and make full use of this friend, so that its value is no longer just 24 hours. The same time can create more valuable things, so that life will no longer become vulgar and mediocre, or even accomplish nothing.
Just like reading, running or traveling, although it is only a small matter, once we make full use of time, then "time" becomes valuable at that moment, and we will no longer waste time. It may seem useless at that time, but more time will have an effect. As a book friend said in a reading group I joined yesterday, a small sapling he planted more than 30 years ago looks like a sick seedling. But after more than 30 years, the sapling has become a towering tree, with lush foliage, and its roots and branches continue to penetrate deep into the rocks. Can't such a big tree give people profound enlightenment at this time? Isn't this a good example?
Although I was not so good as a child, I absorbed energy bit by bit, and the sunshine and rain are what I am today. This just shows one thing, doing one thing needs perseverance to be effective.
We treat time, and time will treat us. As a friend of time, it also has feelings. Its feelings are: If you are good to me, I will repay you.
Think of time as a friend. After reading article 6, I wonder if my friend has the following confusion? Some quick publicity, when you really try, is not found very quickly. What is the reason? Which is more important, method or persistence? In the face of key choices, which should luck or cause and effect pay more attention to? Figuring out whether to lie flat or let time accompany you when you are frustrated may really give you some guidance in the book.
This paper expounds taking time as a friend from the aspects of predicament, reality, management, learning, thinking, communication, application and accumulation. When it comes to whether you want your friends to be "enemies" or "friends", it may be just a moment.
What impressed me was:
(1) Learn to listen. Although "everything is known, everything is inexhaustible, and a hundred people are indifferent, and a hundred people are extinct", we should also pay more attention to the needs of the object;
(2) Learn to dig deep into the root causes, avoid talking about experience, and strive to seek truth from facts. Learn to be independent, take not causing trouble to others as a virtue, and win respect with your own independence.
(3) Reduce the impatience in the application, reasonably control open source and reduce expenditure, and develop your own career, such as health or even a specialty.
In concrete actions, on the one hand, I constantly improve my ability and believe in the existence of luck, but I also understand that luck has nothing to do with me. What I have to do is to persist in accumulation, and through continuous input and output in a certain aspect (such as reading), I believe it will eventually become an interest that I can be proud of. Encourage people around you, help yourself to enter a state that others can't imagine, list the things you think are important, pick out one thing you think is the most important, and then make a timetable to ensure that you concentrate on doing it for 2 hours every day for the next week. This requires learning appropriate refusal in work and life. When making a work plan, we should do what we can and give a flexible time interval.
On the other hand, take the initiative to manage contacts, and suggest contacting family and friends regularly to provide timely care and help. This is not utilitarian. If you can help others, it is also a kind of value. If you need help from others in the future, you can get help in time. Learn to accept the ordinary, know the boundary, get rid of the idealized things, extract the asymmetric advantages and "drill down", and overemphasize the demand, which will only lead to no connections. Learn to expand your social circle, whether professionally or in friendship, and establish contact with everything around you through constant interaction, so as to make your action plan more detailed, broaden your horizons, enjoy the present selflessly, and let time always accompany you to keep improving.
Complex things are done simply, simple things are done seriously, serious things are done repeatedly, and repeated things are done innovatively. Only by mastering the rhythm of life and work can we achieve something. Grasping the rhythm first needs to give up the idea of quick success, and adjusting the rhythm at any time will greatly promote everything. Cultivate a character that is not afraid of trouble, because patience is the prerequisite for success in any work or study. Just like the preface written by Yu at the end of 2009, there was no clear five-year plan from the beginning. Let nature take its course and go forward through thick and thin, but of course we can't do it quickly. Today, we can see the sudden change of New Oriental policy and the continuous exploration of business. There are too many uncertainties in life. Everything can be prepared in advance, and the sooner you wake up, the better. When you encounter difficulties, you should first clear your mind, spend 90% of your time thinking+10% of your time solving the problem, and start with simple steps, because you know what you are doing and what you are doing.
Come on, I hope everyone will invite time to be friends, recognize and persist! From now on, be independent, control your mind, get rid of the bondage of brain emotions, make yourself full of strength, guide your interests, invest more, and make as much effort as anyone else.
Think of time as a friend. This is a good book, which makes me realize the profound influence of spiritual power on people. Everyone wants to succeed. Many successful people and successful scholars have taught them the so-called "secret of success". No matter how much they talk, they are nothing more than conceptual things such as dreams, diligence and persistence. Better than this is to teach you many methods, time management methods, learning methods and so on. How many people can do it? Why can some people do it and some people can't? The reasons and methods are all here. If you still say you can't do it, it's your character. Some unhappy people will jump up and say that they are not persistent enough and have no interest in defending themselves. Forget it. There is no shame in having a bad personality. It's a pity that they didn't realize that all this was caused by their spiritual strength! So what is spiritual power? I have been trying to find the answer in the process of reading this book. After reading this book, I seem to have a certain understanding of the mind. To put it bluntly, the mind is rationality and rationality. What is rationality? Reason is a person's ability to know, understand, think and decide, or to distinguish right from wrong, to be interested and to control his own behavior. Generally speaking, it is the ability to have correct thoughts and concepts and make reasonable behaviors.
If you want to make your spiritual strength stronger, you need to do the following:
1, know how to control desire and delay satisfaction. When it comes to satisfaction, I think of the word "desire". When it comes to desire, I think of people and life. What exactly is a person? People are just a bunch of desires to run. What is life? Life is a process in which a person constantly produces desires and satisfies them all his life.
Be rational and don't be influenced by emotions. People who know "emotional intelligence" must know that emotions can be controlled. People with high emotional intelligence are generally optimistic. They can correctly perceive their emotions and control their negative emotions well. They know "don't punish yourself with other people's mistakes", they know that compared with others, they are not "the most painful people in the world", and they know how to adjust the pressure and make themselves calm. In a word, they know how to use various methods and strategies to get rid of bad emotions and are not affected by them.
3. Not dominated by interests. We have always overemphasized interest, and we often hear people say that I am not interested in a certain major, so my grades are very poor. Because I am not interested in a certain sport, I am not good at it. In fact, on the contrary, you are not interested in something because you are not good at it. On the contrary, we often see that what a person is interested in is what he is good at.
4, sustainable development, adhere to the strategy. Everyone knows the importance of persistence, but not everyone can persist until the end. Some people will say that you can't persist because you don't have perseverance and patience. In fact, this is the result, not the cause. What is persistence? Persistence = strategy+repetition. Without a good strategy and plan, it is basically impossible to complete a relatively large task.
No one can endure an investment with no return and no end in sight for a long time. All long-term persistence comes from scientific and reasonable planning. Of course, making plans is also worth studying. For example, exercise can't make you exhausted, exercise makes you too tired, and it will only make you afraid and even give up. You should make reasonable arrangements according to your own situation. If the method is right, it will last.