Case introduction
Student n, 12 years old, a boy in our class. Seemingly sensible, introverted, usually not easy to be found and noticed by teachers and classmates. In the fourth and fifth grades, I had to carry my schoolbag home for various reasons and didn't want to study. Before I taught him, I had a preliminary understanding of this man, with a big temper and easy behavior. Two things happened this semester, which made me have a deeper understanding of this student. Once, I "lost" the late tuition fees my parents gave him to my teacher, but I refused to admit that I used them for other purposes. Another time, I lost my temper with my teacher because my parents didn't buy me a birthday cake. I usually like to lie, and naturally put all the mistakes and wrongs on others, but there is nothing I can change.
case analysis
In my opinion, the psychological cause of student N is more extreme psychology. Extreme refers to people's views, opinions, etc. Most of them exist in teenagers. Extreme personality and emotions are defects that cannot be underestimated in life. Extreme personality and emotions are a mental illness. It comes from extreme poverty in knowledge, ignorance in knowledge, self-enclosed consciousness in society, subjective idealism in thought and so on.
Common extremes mainly have three characteristics: 1, and one-sidedness in understanding: extreme people look at problems with absolute and one-sided eyes. He always wears colored glasses, generalizes everything, sticks to his own opinions, sticks to a dead end, and ignores people's well-intentioned persuasion and equal discussion. Extreme people complain, complain too much, complain all day about being born at the wrong time and having no talent, and only ask what others have provided him, not what he has contributed to others. Extreme people lack friends. People like to make friends with the same voice and similar feelings. They all like to make friends with knowledgeable and modest people. They always think that they are better than Ming, and when they speak, they will argue with others by pinching their necks. Imagine who wants to deal with such a person? 2. Emotional impulse: extreme emotional expression is to talk about people and things according to personal likes and dislikes and whimsy, lacking rational attitude and objective standards, and vulnerable to hints and temptations from others. If you have a good impression on a person, you think he is all right, but you know it is a mistake and a shortcoming, but you are unwilling to admit it. 3. reckless behavior: the extreme performance in action is reckless, regardless of the consequences. The main reasons for psychological extreme are lack of knowledge and experience, immature development of dialectical thinking and inability to see things in two ways. They tend to exaggerate or shrink things infinitely by grasping one point, thinking that they have seen the whole, and it is easy to make distorted judgments and draw wrong conclusions.
Student N conforms to the performance of extreme psychology in cognition, emotion and behavior, and there are many reasons for its extreme psychology.
First, family factors. As student N is an only child, his parents go out to do business all the year round. At home, usually only the uncle cares about his life, and most parents give money to their children to make up for the so-called parental responsibilities. Lack of family education, a key element, and the important emotional edification of caring relatives lead students to be lonely, aimless and obsessed with playing video games, and often find various interfaces to ask their parents for money. As his parents paid little attention to him, he blamed all his shortcomings on his parents. With the psychological migration, in school, no matter what you say or do is right or wrong, you naturally blame your classmates or even teachers for these mistakes. The lack of family education and family care is the main reason for the formation of students' extreme psychology.
Second, personal factors. Student n has no clear understanding of himself, and everything is self-centered, with his own likes and dislikes as the judgment standard. Because of his extreme and poor interpersonal relationship, this factor made him emotionally impulsive and even made some reckless behaviors. Generalization leads to wrong conclusions and practices.
Third, other people's factors. Because of student n's extreme behavior, other students avoid him. Students think that the number of anger is particularly small. They expose their shortcomings when others are praised, and gloat when others are criticized. No friends, unwilling to associate with them. Therefore, there is a huge psychological distance between student N and his classmates, and loneliness and helplessness promote the further development of his extreme psychology. The teacher also knows something about him, so he doesn't want to "take care of" him more, and he can't get the teacher's concern, which makes him more lonely and urges him to attract the teacher's attention with more extreme behavior. Other factors can not be ignored in the formation of his extreme psychology.
Consulting strategy
1, close the distance and carry out nursing.
Because of the extreme words and deeds of student N, he is far away from other students psychologically, often suffering from discrimination and inferiority, and finally shows pride, paranoia and even opposition. So the first thing to do is to talk to him sincerely and tell him that you are a good boy of your parents, a good student of your teacher, a good classmate of your classmates and a member of your class group. As long as you treat others correctly, you will be welcomed by your classmates, trusted and praised by your teachers and parents. So I often encourage him to care about others and the collective. After many praises, he regained his confidence and was recognized and friendly by his classmates. On his birthday, I gave him a ballpoint pen, which made him very moved, and gradually made him have a new understanding of himself, and his extreme psychology was corrected to some extent.
2, self-management, shaping personality.
Set goals, let students know the main goals of self-control behavior, and strictly regulate their own behavior. "Just do it and stop." Improve self-control ability. Make a time plan, ask him to start from small things, gradually sharpen his will, and let him realize that blindly forgiving and accommodating himself will only slide further and further on the wrong, defective and vicious slope, and eventually he will not be able to extricate himself. Implement the organic combination of criticism and praise, standardize their behavior, guide them out of extremes and shape a psychologically normal personality.
3. Teachers and students strive to promote change.
Communicate with the teacher, make use of every opportunity to find the bright spot of student N, and restrain the uncontrollable behavior of the case owner in a soft way, which reduces the conflict between him and the teacher, is conducive to the smooth progress of the teaching process, and enables him to obtain a quiet, peaceful and friendly learning atmosphere. Guide students to tolerate his shortcomings with a magnanimity, discover his advantages with a patience of panning for gold in the sand, live in peace, make progress together and promote change.
4. Communicate with parents and grow up healthily.
Contact parents through various ways, hoping to go home more, educate more and care more about children. Usually, it is required to pay attention to creating communication situations with children, listen to children's confidences sincerely, use less vulgar and ineffective educational methods, and actively inspire and cultivate children's moral sentiments of truth, goodness and beauty through empathy and mutual care. Make good use of the family as the main battlefield of education, set a good example for children, strive to cultivate their good moral character, and create conditions for opening up their bright future.
Consulting effect
After nearly two months of counseling, student N has been able to have a good psychological exchange with his parents. The relationship with classmates has also become more harmonious; Be able to actively participate in some activities; Have trust in teachers; There is almost no excessive behavior usually caused by extreme psychology.
Case thinking
1. As a teacher, we should have a comprehensive understanding of our students and be caring, careful and responsible in our work.
2, teachers should learn more knowledge, in addition to the theoretical knowledge of the course, do a good job in teaching practice, but also learn other aspects of knowledge, such as mental health knowledge, artistic common sense and so on. In order to become a teacher suitable for modern teaching.
3. Modern education and teaching are extremely challenging. Students' knowledge, living environment and psychological quality are different, so it is more and more complicated to carry out education and teaching.
Education is a trinity of school, family and society. To be a good teacher, we must communicate well with parents, fully tap social resources, and make use of the main position of the school to educate students effectively in knowledge, ability and psychology, so as to cultivate students with healthy minds.