Last weekend, I went back to my hometown, which is more than an hour's drive away, because I had to review my driver's license.
The exit is still as usual, crowded with a group of cab masters and some long-distance hustlers, to the passengers out of the station loud and noisy soliciting business.
A quick exit.
The square saw a pair of 30 years old probably husband and wife, dressed in rural areas, the woman sat on the fence to wipe tears, the man was silent in front of the solemn, I do not know because of the work, family or children's problems.
In the small chowder hall, a group of people men and women clamoring, smoking cigarettes, voice rather high talking about earning money and business.
The familiar feeling of discomfort came to me. From the moment you get off the bus and leave the station, the feeling of a small city begins to penetrate and spread until you are surrounded by its soft atmosphere.
My former high school classmates told me that once they returned to X city, they felt depressed and had no place to go, but once they got to the capital city where they worked, they were full of passion and felt that there were unlimited possibilities for their lives. This feeling I believe that many people struggling in the big city can relate to, the big city at least relatively good respect for your labor, to give you self-reliance self-esteem, rather than a small city around the complexity of nepotism and unnecessary human consumption.
It is said that young people have a **** the same lover called "big city", this is no way out of the matter. Go back to mom told me, cousin and her wife both went to Shenzhen, I was surprised. A few years ago, the Spring Festival to see him, he just came back from Shenzhen, ready to find a job in his hometown, no longer return to Shenzhen. At that time, the feeling was that young people in the big city fluttering around to meet the outside world addicted to return home to live in peace, did not expect to go again, really is "fleeing from the North" and "return to the North" ah. Mom said two people at home can not earn money, a real estate work, in today's situation in the small city of the N line, naturally, can not be sold without performance, a private kindergarten, a salary of about 1,000 yuan, can not support themselves, just like the heroine of the "Brooklyn", there is no way, only to leave. Even without education, he can only do some security work in Shenzhen, after all, the salary is still higher.
He Wei's book, those at the bottom of the wage earners, small business operators, women, said a lot of things can not be resolved, very helpless, often said a word is "no way", yes, a way.
On the bus, the two old ladies chatted recklessly, like in their own yard, nagging family life, nothing more than sons, daughters-in-law, grandchildren, split the family, etc., the Chinese people believe in materialism, to talk about are material and money. These 60-year-olds are often still the economic head of the family, so they have the right to speak, while those 20-something young people who are in the prime of life and married early, but they are trying to find ways and means to hook up with the old man to get material things from the old man without any effort without shame, how many intergenerational conflicts are thus born, in the people's mediation program, hissing, group of demons, and scandalous.
This is true even for highly educated young people. Small city children are especially reserved, children's clothing stores opened a number of, selling children's toys business is particularly good, because the whole family is the most willing to invest in the child. Parents have to give gifts to the class teacher in order to pay attention to their children, and the class leaders are all connected, which makes the elementary school teachers earn money really fast. And some of the young female teachers known for their shrewdness to meet with parents late, the phone asked that the shoes broke, parents are not stupid, immediately went to the mall to buy shoes to the teacher.
That is, how many years ago when I was in high school, the homeroom teacher also wrote a letter directly to the parents to bring, nakedly "begging for dinner". I resisted the parents did not go.
To the DMV, the staff of the word difference in the name of the wrong place, played into the name of another provincial capital city. I told her that this city is the capital of a province, not the city on my ID card, and I guessed that she did not know if she had been out of the province.
The most uncomfortable thing is the attitude of the staff in small places, and a lot of people hate to do things like begging their grandparents. Another 40-year-old woman sitting there in professional attire, while going to do business with acquaintances to exchange pleasantries, was enviously called "you this work is good". I think these people are all related to somewhere, probably everyone who sits in this position is a person of influence.
In addition, also noted another detail is that no matter what the neighborhood supermarkets, restaurants, there is no electronic payment, for the accustomed not to pay cash, take the phone to the market, and even buy baked sweet potatoes have WeChat Alipay dual payment channels, also feel less convenient. Before leaving the supermarket to take 100 yuan to buy a bottle of water, the lights are dim and carelessly did not check the train back to Z City in the cab to prepare the money only to find that the 20 yuan bill worn out a little suspicious, a moment of the heart began to mutter, and some of the dark associations and plans began to hover in the brain lingering. When I got out of the car, I took another new 20 yuan to pay the bill. The first time I saw this, I was able to see a lot of people who were not in a position to make a decision about what to do, and I was able to see a lot of people who were not in a position to make a decision about what to do.
Balzac's book about the provinces and Parisians, the same situation as we are today, how many young people crowded to do everything possible to get a future in Paris to stand firm. The provincials "left the center of talent, breathe the air of thought, not in touch with the ever-changing trend, our knowledge will be stale, interesting will be like stagnant water generally deterioration, there is no place to give vent to enthusiasm, and exaggerate the small things, but reduce the value of enthusiasm. The miserliness which poisons provincial life, and the culture of slandering others, arises in this way."
Stinginess and slander are not the chronic problems of our small places today, but triviality is. And eager to go to the big city to struggle, show their talents and learn skills to achieve self-worth of young people eager to forge ahead to realize their own value has long been left behind the hometown, because of those lethargic, slow wear people will, blunt the mind of the rhythm, the air, and the human condition, can never stand want to escape.
And many of us from the moment we go to college to leave, is the beginning of the continuous escape.