The little sparrow was very unconvinced, but could not find any good way to make it difficult. It so happened that there was a woman butcher cutting meat under the tree, so the little sparrow said to the big sparrow: you are not great? So the little sparrow said to the big sparrow, "Aren't you good? Can you fly down and get a piece of meat out of the butcher's hand?
The big sparrow smiled and said small KS, so a dive to the table to take a piece of meat to fly to the tree, but all of a sudden was caught by the butcher in the right. The butcher was very angry one by one to pull the hair of the big sparrow, the big sparrow only called HELP, the small sparrow really can not see the past, all of a sudden flew down and rushed to the butcher's hand on the bite, the butcher's hand is a pain in the big sparrow released.
The big sparrow desperately flew up the tree, the small sparrow said: this is not bragging right? If I hadn't saved you, you wouldn't have survived. But the big sparrow said: Who wants you to save me? I was about to get naked and fuck him.
One day, the governor invited the guests to have breakfast and said: Today, I invite you to eat doughnuts and rice, you don't have to be polite. The waiter said: rice to big bowl small bowl? The governor said: I treat, of course, each person to a bowl of large portions (feces).
The woman sat down on a bench in the park, looked around and saw no one, then put her legs straight on the chair to relax.
After a while, a beggar came up to her and said, "How about a walk together, lover?"
"How dare you," said the woman, "I'm not the kind of woman who hooks up!"
"So," said the beggar, "what are you doing in my bed?"
The plane will be leaving soon
A group of passengers who had just boarded the plane were asked by a staff member to come down because a part of the plane was broken and needed to be repaired. A moment later, this staff came back to tell the passengers that they could board the plane, and the plane would start right away, and the passengers asked strangely, "It was repaired so fast?" The staff member said, "There was no repair, just a new pilot who dared to fly this airplane."
Forgetting to open the door
I once worked in a small bank in Cornbury, England, which had few customers even at the busiest
There was one day when not a single person came in, and at half-past three in the afternoon
the manager told one of the employees to go and close the front door, and a little later the employee came back and said, "I apologize for the delay. /p>
Apologies, sir." He said in a hasty voice, "The door was closed and I forgot to open it this morning."
Burning Pig's Hair
A certain company stipulates that smoking is prohibited during working hours. One day, the small Wang smoke hidden on the look around no one, busy lit a, is smoking vigorously, heard footsteps, he casually put the cigarette clip on the ear, pretending to read the newspaper. Colleague Xiao Chen walked over to him. Xiao Wang sniffed, said: "Xiao Chen, do you smell, as if there is the smell of burning pig's hair", Xiao Chen fixed his eyes, only then realized!
The six-fingered angel
The artist who painted the frescoes for the church painted the cherub with six fingers.
"When have you ever seen a six-fingered angel?" The priest said in exasperation.
"Never seen one," the painter replied, "but have you ever seen an angel with five fingers?"
2. Two Japanese men were discussing the crowded subway. One says, "It's so crowded, my wife had a miscarriage last week!" The other says, "It's so crowded. The other says, "That's nothing, my wife got pregnant last month!!!"
3. The animals in the forest were talking.
The monkey said, "Elephant fart - play the name of a song."
The kitten said, "Who doesn't know, it's 'Good Thinking' by Leo Ku."
Then the little turtle crawled over from the side and said, "I thought it was Tao Ji Ji's 'when' it ......"
4. a woman cheating husband suddenly came home, * The husband panicked jumped out of the window and fled, mixed into the morning running crowd, a curious person asked: why not wear clothes? Answer: Naked run! Have not seen? Someone replied: Naked run is seen, but have not seen a naked run with a condom!
5. child: "Mom, what is this?"
Mom: "This is rat poison."
Kid: "Mommy, are the rats in our house sick?"
6. Two boys walk into a coffee house. A says, "This is a nice setting!" B said, "Yes, let's eat our own hamburgers here." The two men are just about to move their mouths when the waiter comes over. "Sir, I'm sorry, we can't have BYOB here." : "Why?" "That's the rule we have here!" With that said, the two swapped hamburgers and ate.
7. The Anger of the Tsinghua Boys
★ The Most Shocking "Eyeball" Incident
In the summer of 2002, a beautiful girl I grew up with came to Beijing to play with me and named Tsinghua as the place to go. With only one bike to commandeer, my then-boyfriend drove into Tsinghua with me in the front and the beauty in the back. Walked to the west drill when, oncoming a gg, he initially stared at me a few eyes, did not say anything, when he passed us, suddenly saw sitting in the back there is a mm, and is a beautiful woman, all of a sudden, the gg two eyes wide open, from the bottom of his heart, drank a loud voice: "Shit!"
Wow, that a "lean", now think of it is still in the ear, I have never heard such a full voice in my life ......
8. on the first grade daughter, the first time to write an essay, the title is called "my first time doing The first time she wrote her first essay, it was titled "My First Time Doing Housework," and it was about helping her mom with the laundry. In accordance with the teacher's requirements, after the composition is written to parents to sign, when the screenwriter's father finished reading, pen in the following sentence: the above plot, purely fictional.
9. Mom asked her five-year-old daughter : What do you want for your birthday this year ?
The little girl answered: I want a box of birth control pills!
The mother asks: What do you want for your birthday? What are you going to do with it?
The youngest daughter: I already have four dolls and I don't want any more.
10. The fly family goes to the toilet to eat.
As they were eating, the little fly said in dissatisfaction, "Mommy, why do we always eat shit!?"
The fly's mother gave the little fly a slap on the face and said angrily, "Don't say such disgusting things when you are eating!"
11. After a bachelor's wedding night, the bride came out holding the wall with difficulty and scolded, "Liar, he said he had thirty years of savings, I thought it was money!!!"
12. The truth about the cave
A and B a pair of close friends met for a drink before the wedding.
A said: I asked my fiancée, she blushed and quietly said her breasts like oranges. I thought tangerine on tangerine, we look too general, there is a tangerine is enough for me to gnaw a lifetime.
B said: I also asked my daughter-in-law, she blushed and quietly told me that her breasts like eggs. I think the egg on the egg it, our family background is poor, there is an egg is enough for a lifetime.
The two of them chose the same day to get married, and the next day they met to drink wine.
A: I was cheated by my daughter-in-law, and I never thought that kumquats would be called oranges.
B said: I also ate my daughter-in-law's dumb loss, eggs are also called eggs.
13. Male and female friends sleep in a room, the woman drew a line: over the line is a beast!
Wake up and realize that the male really did not cross the line.
The woman severely hit the man a slap: you are even worse than animals!
An ancient village is found in an ancient mountainous countryside. As they have been isolated from the outside world for generations, just like people in the Peach Orchard, the outside world has a strong interest in them. So a beautiful female reporter traveled to this backward mountain township to interview the locals.
The subject of her interview is an old man in his fifties, and after knowing that they have lived in isolation for generations, the female reporter was surprised and then curious, so she intended to describe the joys and sorrows of their isolated lives.
"May I ask, what is the one thing that has made you happiest over the years?" , the curious female reporter asked.
"One winter, the old three next door lost their sheep." The old man said.
"Is there anything to be happy about when the sheep are lost?" The female reporter was even more curious.
"After the sheep were lost, dozens of us went up the mountain with torches to look for them, and after three days and three nights of searching, we finally found them inside a corner of the back of the mountain," the old man said as he sucked in a cigarette and squinted his eyes back.
"What happened after you found it?" The female reporter asked curiously.
"It was late in the day when we found it, and my door set up a tent inside the snowdrift to rest. It was very windy outside. We got bored. So we all took turns on that sheep. So cool!"
The female reporter obviously felt a bit embarrassed, and she wanted to avoid the topic. So she interrupted the old man and asked if there was anything else to be happy about.
"One winter, the new daughter-in-law of the old horse family in front of us got lost inside the mountain." The old man said.
"Was it found?" The female reporter asked after him.
"Dozens of us searched for three days and three nights, and finally found it in the back corner of the mountain. So we pressed the tent to rest. It was very windy in the winter night. All of us were bored. So we took turns banging Old Ma his family's new daughter-in-law, not to mention how great it was." The old man said knocking the dry tobacco bag in his hand.
The female reporter felt even more embarrassed. She decided to avoid the topic. So she asked, in these decades of living in isolation there is actually nothing to be sad about?
The old man's face suddenly changed, and his hands began to tremble, almost unable to grasp the dry tobacco in his hands. Two turbid tears rolled out of the deep-set eyes. His lips trembled several times, and his body also seemed to be trembling. After a long silence, he said,
。。。。
One winter I lost 。。。。。。。
14.
Some people kept a parrot that was very aggressive. One day, the owner put one of the family's chicks into its cage, and the parrot and the chicken fought, resulting in the death of the chicken, but the parrot did not have any trouble at all, and said, "That's too much of an underestimate of me!" After some time, the master and got an eagle into its cage, the results of the eagle also died, but the parrot's hair are gone, this time it spoke again: "It's damn, the old man is not bare bladder really can not fight!"
15. said a person very much like police dogs 。。。。 One day in the newspaper, I read a news story about the sale of police dogs ~ for 10 w This gentleman took out his savings for a long time and remitted the money to the person who sold the dog and that person promised to send someone to send the dog to the gentleman's home in three days After three days, the gentleman was full of joy at home waiting for someone to ring the doorbell, he opened the door to look at a young man with a stray dog stood in front of him, he asked May I ask what is the matter with you? The young man says, "Sir, I'm here to deliver the dog you ordered a while ago." The gentleman is surprised. It's just a stray dog. It was a police dog, so he called the guy who sold him the dog, and he whispered to him, and he said, "You know, it's a police dog.
16. Three rats tasted the wine of the United States, Japan and China, and the American drank three steps down, and the Japanese drank two steps down, and the Chinese drank two pots of wine, and raised a chopper and shouted, "T M D, where's the cat"
17. My wife wanted to lose weight, so she went horseback riding every day. As a result, the horse lost forty pounds in a month.
18. bus IC card
A few years ago, when the implementation of the card, the car to the station, up a tall woman, her IC card may be placed in the back of the pocket of the jeans, so a car on the ass to the card machine leaning on the "drop" after a sound into the trunk, the woman behind the old lady, not a tall man, not a big man, not a big man, not a big man, not a big man, not a big man. Followed by an old lady, a not tall, she felt strange, how as long as the buttocks to that thing on a lean can ride, so she got on the car to try to pivot on the footboard, and try to buttocks to the card machine, leaning a few times did not succeed, at this time, the driver spoke, "Auntie, what are you doing, grab the coins on the car ah". The lady said, "Isn't that girl leaning her butt here to get a ride? Oh, so this is the case, the driver can not help but laugh and cry, can only explain to him, the girl is using IC card, but the lady does not understand the shrimp called IC card, she is still with the driver entangled, "you this young man is too ungenerous, other beautiful girl pouting with you you let people into the, my old lady pouting with you so many times, you do not let me in, what do you mean in the end? What do you mean?" The driver could not stand it, and could only wave his hand and let her in.
19. Listening to the wrong
A foreigner to take a 50 yuan ticket, in front of the conductor waving: see it? Have you seen it? ......
The ticket seller was dumbfounded and simply took out a 100 Show: Have you fucking seen it?
Finally, I realized that the man wanted to go to "Jianguomen".
20. In a fashion store, I saw a young man waiting impatiently for a pretty girl and said, "Would you mind talking to me for a minute?" The girl asked curiously, "Why? The girl asked curiously, "Why?" "My wife has been in this store for over an hour, but if she sees me talking to you, she'll come right out ......." Without waiting for him to finish, his wife had walked quickly out of the fashion store and left on his arm.
21. female, like sweets, very fat! The woman has a fetish: hate ants, see must kill.
Asked why it said: this little thing, so love sweets, waist is still so thin!
22. There are two birds on the tree, the hunter lifted his gun to hit down one, found that it is a hairless, is wondering, the other bird flew down and cursed the hunter: MD, I just stripped her bare, you hit down!
23. On the bus, the pregnant woman stood and said to the strange man sitting next to her: you do not know I am pregnant? The man was very nervous and said: But the child is not my ah!
24. A man drinking toilet, back to the companion said: "This hotel business is good, even in the toilet are set up two tables!" So he continued to drink. Then, a group of people rushed into the room and pressed the person to beat him up. Companions busy asking the reason, replied: "This kid to our private room randomly pee!"
Ex-husband
There was a couple who got divorced because of bad feelings. After the divorce, the wife remarried; and when she remarried, she didn't
think that her ex-husband was so ungraceful that he went to the church where the marriage was taking place to look for something to say - he went up to the groom and the bride and said to the groom, "
It's not a big deal, it's just old stuff that other people have used. someone else's used old stuff!
The result is that the groomsman really immediately changed face, it is very unhappy ah!
The bride then took a gentle look at her ex-husband, then at the groom, and then told him:
"It doesn't matter! Only the front inch is old, the back is new!"
One day, aqt and wsj were chatting together, aqt said to wsj: old sister, you don't want to go to work, once you go to work, I have to have no business for seven days. wsj heard that, and said to aqt: you know what to do, you're going to fucking leak, I have to have no business for ten months!
25. A girl walked into the managerial department of a large company and asked, "Do you want a female secretary?"
"We'd love to hire you, ma'am, but with the current economic crisis, there's no work."
"I don't care if there's no work, as long as there's a paycheck!"
26.
The only girl in the department came to watch the basketball game. Suddenly, MM's skirt was blown up by the wind, and the boys from outside the department shouted, "Oh my God, the light is leaking out!" The boys in the department sulked and said in unison, "Come on, it's a family scandal! "
The examiner: do you have a boyfriend?
The candidate: Yes.
Examiner: Is he local?
Candidate: No, he is out of town.
The examiner: I'm sorry, my company can not use you.
Candidate: Why?
Examiner: You will not be able to work here for a long time, and we don't want to increase the long-distance phone bill because of you.
(2)
Examiner: Do you have a girlfriend?
Candidates: No.
The examiner: Do you have a girlfriend?
Examiner: Have you ever chased a girl?
Candidate: chased, but did not catch up.
The examiner: are you going to chase girls again after work?
First of all, work hard, do not think about personal problems for the time being.
Examiner: I'm sorry, we can't use you.
The first thing I want to say is that I don't know what to do with the money, and I don't know what to do with it.
The examiner: you have poor public relations skills and lack of self-confidence.
(c)
Examiner: Do you have a girlfriend?
The candidate: yes.
The examiner: Is she pretty?
The candidate: not really.
The examiner: Sorry, we can not use you.
Candidate: Is it possible that a girlfriend who is not beautiful will affect the image of your company?
The examiner: That's not true. However, the company is a business of art, your aesthetic taste does not seem to be suitable for the business needs of the company.
(4)
Examiner: Do you have a girlfriend?
The candidate: Yes.
The examiner: Is she pretty?
The candidate: very beautiful.
The examiner: Is she your first love?
The candidate: Yes.
The examiner: Sorry, we can not use you.
The candidate: Yes, it is.
The candidate: Yes, it is.
(v)
Examiner: Do you have a girlfriend?
The candidate: yes.
The examiner: Is she your first love?
Candidate: No, I've talked to a few before.
The examiner: Sorry, we can not use you. Because you'll be jumping ship soon.
(F)
Examiner: Do you have a boyfriend?
The candidate: Yes.
The examiner: Is he rich?
The candidate: no.
The examiner: Sorry, we can not use you. I'm worried that you won't be able to stand the temptation because you'll be working with money.
(7)
Examiner: Do you have a boyfriend?
The candidate: Yes.
The examiner: Is he rich?
Candidate: Yes, he has his own company.
The examiner: sorry, your boyfriend's company does not use you, we can not use you.
Candidate: But there is no position for me in his company.
Examiner: What are you majoring in?
Candidate: Secretary.
The examiner: Sorry, we still can not use you. The beautiful girl will affect our manager's work.
Candidate: But I'm not pretty?
The examiner: that's even worse. If you do not look beautiful, the manager will not be interested in you
No electricity can only "that"!
There is a place in Shaanxi that is not only poor but also very populous. The county sent a survey team to investigate why the population is growing so fast.
A local villager replied: "We are in the middle of nowhere.
The leader asked: what does this have to do with the large number of people?
Answer: there is no electricity.
The leader wondered: there is no direct relationship ah!
The villagers solve: no electricity can do what?
Jiangnan produce what?
High school will soon be the time of the examination, one day in geography class, the teacher reported a place name on the top, let us answer the local minerals below. After saying a lot of places, the teacher suddenly asked: "Jiangnan produce what?" The whole class answered in unison: "Jiangnan produces beautiful women!"
MM fart: can not be taken into account
The train a lady and an old lady sitting together. The lady wanted to fart and couldn't hold it in, so she pretended to wipe the window with her hand and farted a few times in a row with the friction sound. However, the old lady sitting beside her said to her, "The sound is fine, but what about the smell?"
Reasons for Teachers' Collective Resignation
All the teachers in the second year (5) class of Talent Middle School have collectively applied for resignation to the Academic Affairs Office. The reasons are as follows:
Language teacher: during class, a student was reading a magazine, I confiscated his magazine knocked him on the head ......
But when I turned around and was ready to continue the class, his tablemates actually laughed out loud and made the class not go on
, I asked him. Why did you laugh? You know what he said to me? That kid from the drawer out of a "Thesaurus", even so to me, said: "Teacher, you fortunately did not find that I read, or you will be smashed to death ......"
Math teacher: a test never pass the classmate actually can be handed over the homework in the use of high school knowledge ...... I asked him this homework is not his own do, the students even answered me that I do not know, you say, like words, I continue to ask him to honestly explain, in the end, who helped him to do, hey, he also has a reason, answered me, "Teacher, I I really don't know who did this homework, to be honest, last night I went to bed earlier ......"
Physics teacher: Do you know a single clockwise and a counterclockwise I taught a few lessons? Five lessons ah!
Yes, I also said so to them, I told them if they still do not understand to look at the watch, where the hour hand to go where it is clockwise, the reverse is counterclockwise. However, the class counted over, either cell phones or electronic watches ...... I do not resign I will teach them these two words all semester ah?
Physical education teacher: Why don't I resign? Those boys even gave me a gift! No, it's right to give gifts, I don't mean it's wrong for them to give me gifts, but it's just wrong for them to give me gifts.
How can I say more and more confused, so say it, although I am a little slim, white skin, but at least I am a male teacher right? But a few days ago on March 8 Women's Day, the boys even sent a box of fading cream to me ...... also ...... also ...... also said to me that after the summer don't wear hair pants, shit, that's me! I'm not going to be able to do that!
Biology teacher: I really don't want to go ah, but ...... you know, I have a heart condition, can't stand to be excited, but can I not be excited? Yesterday unit exam, according to the requirements of the syllabus, I let the students look at the teaching picture of the legs of the bird to write the name of the bird, habits. But I just said the content of the test, there is a student stood up to the door, mouth muttered: "Shit, this kind of topic also have, I do not test ......" You say such a student to education? I called him and asked him what his name is, he even pulled his pants, exposed his legs to me and said: "Come on, look at my legs to write my name ah ......"
Art teacher: you know, I have just been assigned to this class. Yesterday, when the class was in session, I just entered the door and heard a few students shouting "beautiful woman", you say angry? I'm the teacher, how can they be so disrespectful? ...... Yes, if just because they called me "beautiful" I resigned that I was wrong, but in my search for who shouted "beautiful", those students shouted at me again: "The first time I saw this, I was in the middle of a conversation with a girl who had been in the middle of a conversation with me.
History teacher: that group of students really can not be taught, the class when I asked the question: "Do you know what Wu Zetian is?" The first student answered me that he and she is not familiar, the second student answered me that he is a netizen, the third student said that he has her QQ number and so after class on QQ ask ...... also a student actually took out his cell phone actually said to ask her immediately!
Geography teacher: look at yourself this time their paper, our country's five famous mountains is the first Zhao Benshan, the most famous river is Pan Changjiang, our country's coal are (black), our country's iron are (hard), you say I still how to class?
English teacher: I speak to the independent structure of the time, according to the textbook requirements, I deliberately taught them such an example sentence: "Our teacher comes into the classroom, book under arm. ), but in the exam, the whole class translated it as "Our teacher comes into the classroom, book under arm."......
Music teacher: I'm in a classroom, demonstrating a song.... ...The students all applauded after the song. I was very happy, I was thinking, the other teachers may be teaching methods are not right ...... But they have not let me think about the end of the negative answer to me, they shouted: "Teacher, great, you are the best of all teachers in the best ventriloquism, the first time we heard so much like a duck call! "
Chemistry teacher: Me? You're asking me? I haven't had a lesson yet, but all the other teachers have been forced to resign, so if I don't resign I'm waiting to take on their pain ah?
The story goes that one day, God had nothing to do and was walking around heaven.
There was a long line there, and the archangel Peter was sitting at a table, registering those who were going to enter heaven.
As soon as Peter saw God he was overjoyed and exclaimed, "GOD! What a good time you have come, I have to go to the bathroom, will you take over first?"
Then Peter left and God took a seat at the table.
There was an old man standing in front of the table at this time, God looked at the old man's gray hair and withered and vicissitudes of his face, and for some reason had a very deep feeling.
God gently questioned the old man and said, "What was your occupation during your lifetime?"
"Carpenter." The old man replied.
God was so shaken in His heart that He quickly asked, "Did you have a son?"
The old man's face became sad all at once: "Yes, but he left me many years ago and I never saw him again. My poor boy."
God stood up all at once: "Then.... , your son, he.... Did he have nails driven into his hands and feet?"
The old man looked at God in amazement, "Yes, but, God, how did you know ?"
God hugged the old man and burst into tears of excitement, "Oh! Father, I've finally found you!"
The old man's face also immediately glowed with joy, "Oh, I can't believe how big you've grown! Is it really you? Pinocchio?"
Interview
Three applicants for the police academy were waiting for their interviews. The examiner called the first candidate in and handed him a picture of a man and asked him to look at it carefully and name any noteworthy features. After a few minutes, the candidate said, "This man has only one ear."
The examiner said, "This one is a side shot."
The examiner shows the same photo to a second candidate and asks the same question.
The second candidate picked up the photo and looked at it closely for a while and replied, "This person has only one ear ."
The examiner was not pleased and replied, "This is a side view!"
He similarly instructed a third candidate to look at the photo. After a few minutes, that candidate said, "This man wears contact lenses."
The examiner was slightly surprised and checked the profile. "You're right! How did you see that?"
The third candidate said, "It's easy, he can't wear normal glasses because there's only one ear ."
Christian
One day an atheist was out in the forest, taking a walk and admiring all that evolution had created.
What magnificent trees! What magnificent rivers! What beautiful animals! " he marveled in his heart, and as he strolled along the riverbank, he suddenly heard a rumble in the bushes behind him, and turned to see a three-meter-tall bear charging at him! Shocked, he turned and scrambled along the trail as the bear came closer and closer 。。。。。。
His heart pounded wildly as he tried to run faster,
Oops! He tripped and fell.
Turning over to jump up, the bear was already in front of him, his left paw on him, his right paw raised and about to swing down 。。。。。
"Oh, God! " he exclaimed
Suddenly, time stood still, the bear froze, the forest was silent, and even the river stopped flowing ．．．．．．
Astonishingly bright light shone on him, and a voice like thunder rang out from all directions, "You have denied my existence for so many years, and taught others that I don't exist, and even attributed everything I've created to an accident in the universe. And now you expect me to save you from this? Can I count you as a believer in God?"
The atheist lifted his head with difficulty, looked straight at the bright light, and said, "It would be hypocritical of me to ask to be a Christian just now, but perhaps you could make this bear a Christian?"
"Very well," said the voice
The light faded, and the forest once again filled with its usual sounds, and the creek gurgled again...
See the bear kneeling on his knees, two paws and in front of his chest, bowed his head and said
"Lord, thank you for giving me the food in front of me"
My repeated crimes against my husband
1, eating apricots in the morning when I went to work on the bus, the nucleus has no place to throw it, and now we are talking about the spirit of civilization, can not throw it, but the car is also the same as in the car. The first thing that I did was to throw my husband's neck around and throw him in the shirt. After getting out of the car, I smiled at him and told him that I licked the kernel very clean and there was no scum on it. According to the cumulative, to the husband's neck stems *** thrown things are: plum core, waste tickets, and one dollar coins (this I guarantee that I did not throw on purpose, is that I dropped into the hand).
2, sometimes go to work by 22, the car only a seat, of course, my husband let me sit, I every time than my husband under the early, I got up when I said loudly: "Grandpa you sit here to it!" I'm not sure how much I'm going to be able to do this, but I'm sure I'll be able to do it.
3, there are good things to eat, the first to the husband's share of spit, he did not want to eat, are given to me (in fact, originally to me to eat), and then he learned this trick, the first to my food spit, I grabbed up and ate it, and said loudly incense.
4, recently, we all dare not yawn in front of each other, because as long as one side of the open mouth, the other side will be rushed to that big mouth "poof" sound. Ha ha.
5, when you sleep at night, pretend to be very close to him, tightly against him, and then squeeze him under the bed.
6, walking on the road, suddenly pretending not to recognize him, and then introduced himself to him, and then the hands of the things to sell him, from him to cheat pocket money.
7, at home, we often play the eucalyptus and koala game, he opened his arms, disguised as a tree, I hold his neck dabbing up, two legs tightly clamped to his waist, I said I was a koala, sniffing around his face, looking for any leaves to eat, after a while, my husband will shout, bad, the bark to fall, I look, haha, I have no strength, pickpocket! I can't help him, gradually sliding down, and then his pants on ......
8, the evening my husband came back from working overtime, I can hear him open the door as early as possible, and then pretend to be a puppy like, on him to smell, and then smell.
9, dinner time, deliberately give him a lot of rice, are high out of the bowl a lot, and then take my empty bowl, poorly said to him: "moncler, reward mouth rice to eat it."