Nie can be said to be a morbid, paranoid and neurotic person, which is determined by his family environment and growing experience. His atypical personality created his complex feelings for Yan Danzhu.
First of all, Nie Qingchuan is weak. At the beginning of the novel, we learned that his "narrow shoulders and slender neck seemed immature when he was sixteen or seventeen." So he is jealous of all healthy peers. When he met Yan Danzhu on the bus, his psychological activity was: "He doesn't like to see girls, especially healthy and beautiful girls, because they make him feel particularly dissatisfied with himself." Why does he especially hate girls of healthy peers? Probably because, for them, he added a layer of inferiority to jealousy. In his youth, it is inevitable to think of love. He always felt that he was not good enough for them. What you can't get, except greedy eyes, is probably a little angry.
However, he has no affection or admiration for Yan Danzhu. Because of his eccentric personality, he has few friends at school, and only she approaches him actively. A normal person is always happy, at least, he won't be disgusted with the kindness of others. However, due to inferiority and nervousness, he was flattered by her approach and refused to accept it, which led to complex resentment. Zhang Ai's description here is particularly apt. "At home, he hates Liu Ma as much as he hates Dani at school. It is normal for people to be frozen stiff in cold weather. A little warmth makes him feel biting cold. " At the same time, as a normal man, he also has a good impression on Yan Danzhu's good looks, and there are many obscure descriptions in the novel.
Nie's hatred for Yan Danzhu had to talk about the entanglement between their parents. Yan Danzhu's father was his mother's first lover, but he failed to get married due to family reasons. Nie Qingchuan's biological father turned his anger on him because his mother never loved him, and his stepmother gave him a very dark childhood. He has fantasized many times that midnight is his father's scene, and he is paranoid about a pair of parents bound by love. He thinks that everything he has now is caused by an unhealthy family. He felt that Yan Danzhu was not good enough and failed her family. "The more I think about it, the more I feel that she is shallow and boring. If he has such a good family background, he will certainly take advantage of the opportunity to become a perfect person. " He even felt that everything Zhu Dan had should be his, and he wanted to take her away. "He held her shoulder tightly with one arm, and pressed her head down with the other hand desperately, as if to retract her head into the cavity. She should never have been born in this world. She wants him back. "
Nie Qingchuan is eager to talk to Dani. This is a subtle and unspeakable desire. To him, she is a woman, a friend and a family member. She is the representative of Yan Jia and the symbol of the happy life he has been longing for for for twenty years. "Does she love him a little? He doesn't want revenge, just a little love-especially the love of his family. Since Yan Jia is not related to him by blood, even marriage will do. In any case, he wants to have some contact with Yan Jia. "