Twenty-three years ago, there was a young woman who came to our village, with a disheveled face, giggling when she saw people, and urinating in public without any shame. As a result, the village daughters-in-law often spat at the woman, and some of them even went up and kicked her a few times, telling her to "get out of here". But she just wouldn't go away, still giggling and wandering around the village.
My father was 35 years old at the time. He had broken his left hand working in a stone quarry, and because his family was poor, he never got married. Grandma saw that the woman still has a few good looks, it moved the heart, decided to take her to my father as a daughter-in-law, and when she gave my family "renewed the flame", and then threw her away. Although my father was reluctant to do so, he gritted his teeth and agreed to do so. The result is that the father has not spent a single penny on the bridegroom.
When my mother gave birth to me, my grandmother held me in her arms and said with joy, "This crazy bitch has given me a grandson with a handle." Only when I was born, Grandma carried me away and never let Niang* get close.
Niang always wanted to hold me, many times in front of grandma strained to shout, "Give, give me ......" grandma ignored her. I'm so small, like a fleshy tootsie, what if Niang misses and drops me on the floor? After all, Niang was crazy. Whenever Mother had a request to hold me, Grandma always glared at her and admonished her: "Don't you want to hold the child, I won't give it to you. If I find out you've stolen him, I'll beat you to death. Even if I don't beat you to death, I'll have to whisk you away." Grandmother said this without any semblance of ambiguity. Niang understood and was filled with trepidation, each time just looking at me from a distance. Even though Mother's milk was bloated, I didn't get half a mouthful of Mother's milk, and it was Grandma who fed me spoonful by spoonful. She said that there was a "nervousness" in my mother's milk, and that I would be in trouble if it was passed on to me.
At that time, my family was still struggling with poverty. The family often struggled to make ends meet, especially with the addition of my mother and me. Grandma decided to get rid of her because she not only ate "idle food" at home, but also caused trouble from time to time.
One day, Grandma cooked a big pot of rice and gave her a big bowl of rice, saying, "Daughter-in-law, this family is too poor, and Grandma is sorry. After you finish this bowl of rice, go and find a richer family to live with, and never come back again, huh?" Mother had just grubbed a large ball of rice in her mouth, and was so surprised to hear her grandmother's "expulsion order" that the ball of rice froze in her mouth. Mother looked at my grandmother's arms, inarticulate wailed: "No, don't ......" Grandmother sank his face violently, and took out the authoritative parental style and roared: "You crazy bitch, stubborn what stubborn, stubborn down no good for you! You're a crazy bitch, why are you so stubborn? You've been wandering around, I've taken you in for two years, what more do you want? Eat and leave, do you hear me?" After saying this, Grandma took out a hoe from behind the door, and knocked it heavily on the ground like Yu Taijun's dragon head staff, with a "thud" sound. Mother was startled, timidly looked at her mother-in-law, and slowly lowered her head to look at the rice bowl in front of her, there are tears falling on the white rice. Under the forced gaze, Niang suddenly had a very strange behavior, she divided a large part of the rice in the bowl to the other empty bowl, and then looked at Grandma pitifully.
The grandmother was dumbfounded, but it turned out that she was telling the grandmother that she would only eat half a bowl of rice at each meal, and was only asking that she not be driven away. The heart seems to have been pulled a few hard, grandmother is also a woman, her tough attitude is also pretending. Grandma turned her head away and held back her hot tears, and then resumed her face and said, "Eat quickly, eat quickly, eat and leave quickly. You'll starve to death in my house." Mother seemed to be desperate, did not even eat the half bowl of rice, staggered out of the door, but stood in front of the door for a long time not to go. Grandma said with a hard heart, "Go, go, don't look back. There are many rich people under the sky!" Instead, she came closer, and reached out with one hand to Grandma's arms; as it turned out, she wanted to hug me.
Grandma was melancholy for a moment, but still handed the swaddled me to Niang. Mother took me in her arms for the first time and grinned a springy smile. Grandma, however, was on the verge of an attack, with both hands underneath me, fearing that Niang's insanity would take over and throw me away like garbage. After holding me for less than three minutes, Grandma couldn't wait to snatch me up, then turned around and went inside, closing the door behind her.
When I was ignorant of what was going on, I realized that all the other kids had mothers except me. I asked my father for one, I asked my grandmother for one, and they said, "Your mother is dead. But my friends told me, "Your mother is crazy and was driven away by your grandmother." I went to my grandmother and asked her to give me back my mother, calling her a "wolf grandmother" and even throwing the food she served me on the floor. At that time, I didn't have the concept of "madness", I only knew that I missed her very much, what did she look like? Was she still alive?
When I was six years old, my mother actually came back after five years away from home.
On that day, a few of my buddies came running to report: "Xiao Shu, go and see, your mother is back, your crazy mother is back." I was so happy that I ran out of the house, and my father and grandmother chased me out. This was the first time I had seen my mother since I could remember. She was still dressed in rags, with some yellowed grass in her hair, and God knows where she spent the night in that haystack. Mother didn't dare to enter the house, but faced my house, sitting on the stone roller in the rice paddy in front of the village, holding a dirty balloon in her hand. When I stood in front of her with a group of friends, she eagerly searched for her son among us. Mother finally stared at me, dead center, cracked her mouth and called me: "Little tree ...... ball ...... ball" She stood up, kept raising the balloon in her hand, and curtly stuffed it into my arms. I, however, was vigorously backward. I was greatly disappointed, I did not expect that my day and night thought of my mother is actually such an image. A little friend coaxed from the side, "Little Tree, now you know what a crazy person looks like, right? It's your mother like this."
I angrily said to my little friend, "She is your mother! It's your mother who's crazy, it's your mother who looks like this." I turned my head and ran away. I don't want this crazy mother. Instead, Grandma and Father took Mother in. Back then, after Grandma whisked Niang away, her conscience was tortured, and as she aged day by day, her heart could no longer be hardened, so she took the initiative to leave Niang behind, and I was bossy because Niang had disgraced me.
I've never given my mother a good look, never talked to her on my own initiative, and never called her a "mother", and the communication between us was dominated by my "roar", and my mother never dared to talk back.
The family couldn't afford to keep her for nothing, so Grandma decided to train her to do some odd jobs. When she was working in the fields, she took her out to "observe" and said that if she didn't listen, she would be beaten.
After a few days, Grandma thought that she had trained herself almost to the point where she told her to go out and cut the hogweed alone. I didn't realize that it took her only half an hour to cut two baskets of "hogweed". Grandma was furious and panicked when she saw that she was cutting rice that was in the process of being harvested in someone else's field. Grandma was furious and scolded her: "crazy bitch grain and grass do not distinguish between ......" Grandma was thinking about how to make amends, the owner of the paddy field came, and even said that the grandmother deliberately abetted. Grandma was furious, in front of people took out a stick and knocked on the back of the mother, said: "kill you crazy bitch, you give my mother to get away from ......"
Niang although crazy, pain is still aware of, she jumped and jumped to avoid the mallet, the mouth kept sending out "don't, don't". She jumped and jumped to avoid the mallet, and her mouth kept issuing the wail of "don't, don't ......". In the end, people can not see eye, took the initiative to say "Forget it, we do not pursue. In the future, she will look at the strict point is ......" After this storm subsided, the mother crooked on the ground sobbing. I contemptuously said to her: "Grass and rice can not distinguish, you really a pig." As soon as the words left my mouth, I received a slap on the back of my head from Grandma. Grandma glared at me and scolded me, "Little brat, how do you talk? She's still your mother!" I disdainful mouth a skim, "I do not have such a stupid crazy mother!"
"Ho, you're really getting out of line. Let's see if I don't hit you!" Grandma raised her palm again, then I saw my mother jump up from the ground like a spring and straddle the middle between my grandmother and I. She pointed to her head and screamed, "Hit me, hit me".
I realized that she was asking her grandmother to hit her, not me. The grandmother's hand in mid-air dropped, and she muttered, "This crazy bitch knows how to love her own children. Soon after I went to school, my father was hired by a fish-farming professional in a neighboring village to guard a fish pond, earning 50 yuan a month. She still went out to work under the leadership of her grandmother, mainly to beat the hogweed, and she didn't cause any more big messes.
I remember one winter day when I was in the third grade, it suddenly started to rain, and my grandmother asked my mother to bring me an umbrella. Mother may have fallen all the way a number of wrestling, muddy like a mud monkey, she stood by the classroom window looking at me giggling, mouth also called: "Tree ...... umbrella ......" some students giggled, I As if sitting on pins and needles, on the mother hate teeth itchy, hate her ill-advised, hate her to give me shame, but also hate to take the lead in the coaxing of Fan Jiaxi. When he was still mimicking exaggeratedly, I grabbed the stationery box in front of me and violently smashed it at him, but was dodged by Fan Jiaxi, who rushed forward and grabbed me by the neck, and the two of us tore each other up. I'm small, I'm no match for him, and I was easily pressed to the ground by him. At this time, only to hear outside the classroom came "ow" a long whistle, mother like a warrior like flying in, a grab Fan Jiaxi, dragged to the outside of the house. It's true what they say about the strength of a madman. Mother's hands will bully me Fan Jiaxi lifted into the air, he cried out in fear, a pair of chubby little legs in the air kicking and stomping. Mother paid no attention and actually threw him into the pond in front of the school, then walked away with a look of indifference.
Niang had gotten into a lot of trouble for me, and she acted as if nothing had happened. In front of me, Mother resumed her timid demeanor and looked at me pleasingly. I realized that this is mother's love, even if delirious, mother's love is awake, because her son was bullied by others. At that time I couldn't help calling out, "Mother!" It was the first time I had called out to her since I could speak. Mother was shaken, looked at me for a long time, then blushed like a child, grinned and giggled. That day, for the first time, we mother and son **** home under one umbrella. I told grandma about this, grandma fell down on her chair in shock, and hurriedly asked someone to go and call dad back. Dad just entered the house, a group of strong men with knives and sticks broke into my house, indiscriminately, the first pots and pans smashed to pieces, home like a magnitude nine earthquake. These are the people invited by Fan Jiaxi's family, Fan's father viciously pointed at his father's nose and said: "My son scared out of his nerves, and is now lying in the health center. If your family doesn't come up with 1000 dollars for medical expenses, I'll burn your house with a fucking fire."
1000 dollars? Dad is only 50 dollars a month! Looking at the murderous Fan family, Dad's eyes slowly burned red as he stared at Niang with a very terrified gaze, one hand flew down to unbuckle the belt around his waist, and struck Niang head on. One after another, Niang like a scared rat, like a prey running into a dead end, helplessly jumping, hiding, she let out a mournful sound, and the belt on her body issued a kind of crisp sound, I can not forget all my life. In the end, it was the chief of the police station who came to stop Dad's violent hands. The result of the mediation at the police station was that both sides had suffered losses to each other, and both sides did not owe each other anything. Whoever was causing trouble would be arrested! After a group of people left, Dad looked at the house full of pots and pans debris, and look at the bruised mother, he suddenly put her in his arms and cried bitterly, said: "Crazy bitch, it's not that I want to beat you, if I do not beat you, this thing can not go down to the ground, we do not have money to pay compensation to other people ah. This is all the fault of our poor family!" Dad looked at me again and said, "Shu'er, you must study hard and go to college. Otherwise, we'll be bullied for the rest of our lives!" I nodded my head understandingly.
In the summer of 2000, I entered high school with excellent grades. My grandmother, who had been suffering from a disease, unfortunately passed away, and the family's life became even more difficult. The civil affairs bureau of Enshizhou classified my family as a special hardship family, with a monthly subsidy of 40 yuan, and my high school also appropriately exempted my tuition and fees, so I was able to continue to study.
Because I was living in school and studying hard, I rarely went home. My father was still working for 50 yuan, and the burden of delivering food to me fell on my mother. Every time, the aunt next door always helped me to copy the pickles, and then handed over to the mother to send. 20 kilometers of mountain road loss mother firmly remembered, rain or shine. It's also a miracle that she doesn't go crazy at all when it comes to doing things for her son. In addition to the mother's love, I can not explain this phenomenon in medicine should be how to decipher.
April 27, 2003, another Sunday, Mother came, not only for me to send food, but also brought a dozen wild fresh peaches. I picked up one, took a bite and asked her with a smile, "Quite sweet, where did it come from?" Mother said: "I ...... I picked ......" I did not expect mother will pick wild peaches, I heartily praised her: "Mother, you are really more and more capable. " Mother heatedly laughed.
Niang before she left, I told her to pay attention to safety, mother oh-oh responded. I sent my mother away, and I got stuck into the final review before the college entrance examination. The next day, I was in class, my aunt rushed to school and asked the teacher to call me out of the classroom. My aunt asked me if my mother had sent me any vegetables, and I told her that she had, but that she had gone back yesterday. I told her that she had gone back yesterday, but my aunt said, "No, she hasn't come home yet." My heart tightened, my mother wouldn't have taken the wrong road, would she? But she had traveled this road for three years, so she could not have made a mistake. Auntie asked, "Your mother didn't say anything?" I said no, she brought me a dozen wild peaches. Aunt clapped her hands: "Bad, bad, bad, may be bad in this wild fresh peaches." Aunt asked me to take a vacation, we went back along the mountain road to find, the way home there are a few wild peach trees, peach trees sparsely hanging a few peaches, because of the growth of the cliffs to be preserved. At the same time, we found a peach tree has a branch broken signs, under the tree is a hundred feet deep abyss. My aunt looked at me and said, "Let's go under the crag and take a look!" I said, "Aunt you don't scare me ......" Aunt can't help but pull me toward the valley ......
Niang quietly lying at the bottom of the valley, surrounded by some scattered peaches. She was still clutching one in her hand, and the blood on her body had long since solidified into a heavy black color. I grieved to all the organs, tightly embraced the mother, said: "Mother ah, my bitter mother ah, son regret should not say this peach sweet ah, is the son to take your life ...... mother ah, you live not enjoy a day of blessing ah ...... "I put my head on my mother's cold face, and cried so hard that the rocks on the mountain all wept with me ......
August 7, 2003, on the 100th day after my mother's burial, the letter of acceptance from Hubei University passed through the path that my mother had taken, through the peach trees, through the rice field in front of the village, and went straight to the "mother of the day". The letter of acceptance from Hubei University flew straight into my house through the path that Mother had taken, through the wild peach trees, and through the rice paddies in front of the village. I put this belated letter on my mother's cold grave: "Mother, my son has grown up, do you hear me? You can laugh at the nine springs!"