01
If it is not to the point of no return, no one is willing to embark on the road to divorce, when the marriage to divorce, but also formally announced to the world the end of this relationship.
In people's impression, divorce is basically young or middle-aged people, because many people nowadays, do not condescend to themselves at all, if it does not go well that will leave, will not be the motto of the people for the relationship.
In people's awareness, people in their 50s and 60s are a more stable group, partly from people's inherent knowledge.
Because people of this age have come from the hard times, when productivity was low, material was scarce, and people had to settle for food and clothing, and their spiritual pursuits, including their love life, were all based on making do.
Many couples have spent their entire lives just making do, not enjoying true love, and perhaps not knowing what love means.
On the other hand, at this age, people and their other half have gone through decades of stormy times, and what they should have experienced has been experienced, and will not be able to have the idea of divorce.
02
But is this really the case? In 1980, 0% of middle-aged and elderly people asked for a divorce because of "incompatibility of character", but 23 years later, the proportion had risen to 37%.
Latest data show that the divorce rate of Chinese people over 60 is rising, and the phenomenon of "twilight loose" is gradually increasing. By the end of last month, the nation's only geriatric court in Shanghai's Jing'an District People's Court had accepted 37 divorce cases from people over 60, a 68 percent increase over the previous year.
Why are these groups, which are considered stable, gradually joining the ranks of the divorced, because it's not just the young who are being changed as society develops, but also the middle-aged and the elderly who are also y affected.
Some statistics show that within 10 years after retirement, there is a high incidence of divorce among the elderly, with parties under 65 accounting for about 70% of elderly divorce cases.
In fact, this kind of divorce of the elderly in foreign countries has long been not uncommon, this trend has long been popular around the world, the Westerners called "silver hair divorce", the Japanese called "ripe divorce".
So the root cause of these older people's divorce, after all, they were once our fantasy of love, and now this fantasy has been broken.
03
Affective foundation is not strong
Because the older generation, the emotional foundation between them would have been very weak, or no emotional foundation, their marriage is more of a matchmaker's words, parents' orders.
The two such a patchwork union, also created their marriage is also patchwork, in our current words is to make do with the life.
Previously, my grandmother and I said, they were married at that time, which is like this now to the house car, and even the bride price is not much, is a meaning only, and then confusedly married my grandfather.
The two old men lived and quarreled all their lives, and the consequence of this kind of patchwork marriage is that the two people did not have enough understanding before they got married.
More often than not, the two people have very different personalities, and they fight all day long over trivial matters at home.
And my grandfather, this person, in my grandmother's words is a bit of traditional chauvinism, at home basically do not do housework, all rely on the grandmother to work alone.
They usually do too much work, which in that era is not to eat and drink, for which Grandma had a lot of quarrels with Grandpa, Grandma said, if she was younger, she would have to divorce Grandpa.
04
Accumulation of unhappiness, finally endured enough
Young, people always feel that their feelings are sensational, sensational start, sensational end.
Later found that the original feelings are actually full of blandness, it began in the bland time, but also disappeared in the bland days and nights.
Decades between husband and wife, many couples have long been in the many years of quarrels in the feelings of grinding no, in fact, every quarrel is not a big deal, but more will be blocked in each other's hearts.
Once, because the family, because the child, the couple endured, contradictions accumulate, in the end, the two people have endured enough, enough, so choose to divorce.
05
Improvement of women's status
In the old days were there divorces? Of course there were, but very few, and mostly by men, and at one time a man's letter of repudiation was like a bolt from the blue for a woman.
Then the woman's social status is low, leaving the man is really difficult to live, but also from the public opinion of society and the influence of traditional concepts, so that the woman is not quite dare to divorce.
Today, women's society has greatly improved, once a man can be at home like a grandpa, today can not, marriage is a matter of two people, so men and women have *** with the business.
In addition to these, there are some external factors, now the elderly recreational activities more and more, what senior activity centers, square dance, ballroom dancing, WeChat, microblogging play more than the young people also skipped.
These recreational methods have greatly increased the opportunity for older people to make friends, which also caused a lot of people, in old age, but also staged derailment, betrayal, twilight love of these bloody things, which also caused a lot of marital rupture.