I'm a grandmother now. But I would never say that. Because I live my own life and my children live their children's lives. If you need help, come forward at once. You don't need help. Stand back immediately. Live your own life. Have less sex with children and associate with them.
Every generation. And don't say that the old man and the child have lived together for four years, that is, four months, or even less. Looking at the lovely grandchildren, the old man really doesn't want to leave.
But the education of children, as an old man, really can't keep up with the rhythm of the times. Not only old-fashioned, but also always telling children about their experiences. It is a good name to say that good family education starts with dolls. On the contrary, every time a child cries, the old man loses. Yes, the son is not the godfather's fault, but as a grandmother, the generation gap is too long. A good family style is revealed in the bones, and it can't be accommodated in a few words. Besides, what can a four-year-old understand?
Therefore, in the face of this situation, as a son and daughter-in-law, being tough is the best policy. The best way is that the young couple would rather earn less money, spend more time with their children, calm down, give the old man a buffer time to ease, and perhaps receive unexpected surprises. The old man understands that children can thrive. Home and everything!
This question is very simple, you can tell grandma. Children should not be forced to educate during the rebellious period, but should be reasonable and follow the trend. If grandma can't stand feelings, let the children go. You can go to the square dance, cook for us, and we will take care of the children ourselves. There is no need to let grandma go back to her hometown. Some grandmothers are willing to live in the city. Our relatives sent their children to work during the day, and grandma found a job, which was satisfactory to both sides.
You don't know when you will be blessed. Now many girls don't marry without their mother-in-law. They sincerely help you live. Giving the child to her is more reassuring than giving it to others. If you have anything to discuss with your family, it's hard to say anything. I'm afraid you don't treat her like family. Your husband is yours. She was born. Your husband will love you more if you are kind to your mother-in-law. Don't go too far, because that's his mother.
I think we should have a good communication with the child's grandmother. Education is a matter for parents. Grandma is old, can't keep up with the form, has backward education methods, and has no knowledge at all.
You told her to go back with good intentions. You want her to go back to her hometown to rest, live the life she wants, miss her children and come back to see her. This is good, because grandma is around, and when the mother educates the children, the children refuse to accept management, always thinking that grandma can help them, which will ruin the children.
call out
The child's father and grandmother talk, I believe she can understand.
I wonder if my answer can help you?
How nice it is that you have such a mother-in-law who can take care of your children! Lighten your burden. This is what every daughter-in-law wants, so cherish the hard-won affection.
You can't change this matter, and you can't rush it. Otherwise, it is easy to make a big fuss about small things, and both sides are full of grievances.
It is a common phenomenon that the older generation and their parents have different ideas and opinions on children's education. Small contradictions between mother-in-law and daughter-in-law, or between mother-in-law and daughter-in-law, are also difficult to read in our family. Your family has it, my family has it, and many people have met it. Noisy and forbearing, as children grow up, the days will pass. Looking back, who will say the past!
However, when these things happen, each other will not give in and understand, and we must argue clearly, then these disputes will become a thorn in my heart. We must find ways to deal with it in time.
I have met a situation different from yours, but it may inspire you.
The thing is, when my son went to kindergarten, my mother-in-law came from her hometown to help. Because every generation of relatives, the mother-in-law who has always been extremely strict with several children, is also unrelenting in front of her grandchildren. What Sun Tzu does is right, good and acceptable when there is no right or wrong.
And we think that children should behave themselves. For example, some children will cry and make a scene in the supermarket just because they don't meet the requirements of this and that. After our child can talk, we took him to the supermarket, which instilled in him an idea that he can choose one or two things he likes, and if he wants more, he can save them for the next time he goes to the supermarket. Therefore, he never rolled around because he was not satisfied.
When my mother-in-law came to my house to help with the children, we were used to making rules for the children's education. Mother-in-law sometimes can't stand it, and thinks that we are too strict, and the children are already excellent. She compared the children in the village who were spoiled by the older generation. As soon as we criticized education, she turned black and lost her temper.
This is not always the case, so at the moment when I get along well with her, I talked about the education of children. I commend her children for their good education. My husband has three brothers and sisters, neither rich nor expensive, but the family is harmonious and healthy. In contrast, some children of my father-in-law's other brothers and sisters were spoiled when they were young, but they did not follow the right path when they grew up, or their families were unhappy.
She also lamented that at that time, the requirements for children were strict and the rules were heavy. I took the opportunity to say that I thought the same thing as her. Children are still young, and they still need education then. She also nodded and said yes.
Then I talked about an elder in my family. In those days, he was very strict with his children. However, when he met his little granddaughter, he followed his ass and said nothing. The mother-in-law listened and said, "Every generation is like this."
At this point, I put forward my suggestion, and I said, "Look, your heart melted when you met your grandson. This is inevitable. When I become a mother-in-law, I guess I won't be much better than you. You see, next time we educate your grandson, and you don't have the heart, why don't you hide and go downstairs? Or, when we want to educate him, we just hide in the room and pretend not to see or hear. How about it? " She listened to my words and smiled, which was a tacit approval of my suggestion. After that, we didn't have a big contradiction on the education of our children.
Therefore, I think you, especially your husband, should make use of the good atmosphere to communicate with the elderly and express your opinions sincerely. It's all for the children, or we should try to communicate and reach an understanding. Don't let the old people feel rejected. Besides, having an ancient family is like having a treasure. Especially when your husband and wife can't go home in time because of work and other factors, you can have no worries at home with the elderly accompanying the children. What a happy thing!
Who can appreciate the hard work of being a woman for a lifetime? There seems to be only one answer: this is what you should do! In life, the title of "grandma" is realized through continuous development and improvement. She is the wife of her husband, the mother of her son and the mother-in-law of her daughter-in-law. Grandma didn't feel proud until her grandson was born. This constant identity passed down from generation to generation is both glorious and humble. This is my personal experience.