During the time I spent in conversation and communication with Vertical Diffusion, he always inexplicably posed some bleak questions to me, questions that seemed to leave the real world behind, but were tightly entwined with reality. He always reminded me to become "me", and always wrote "me" as someone else. Suddenly, there were times when I didn't even know who I was, or who I was. Then those sad emotions began to come to my heart, and the worldly transitions bound me again. Then I slowly realized that during the twenty-four hours of the day, the real me actually exists for a brief period of time. For the rest of the time I was not the real me, I was just a carrier of information transmission, like a certain node on a blockchain, and like a person in a condom, I had to play some roles. This had to put me into an inexplicable panic, imagine, I am afraid of the relentless passage of time, yes, that's it, in the busy rhythm of every day, I can always clearly see the time just in my body to pass, the kind of can not catch the sense of separation, will be my inner world and the reality of life mercilessly cut off, so whenever I quietly go to the lyrical heart of the idea, I am a real let myself live a meaningful me.
Although this may seem a bit absurd, when an attentive reader reads this, he will surely secretly snicker at my neuroticism. Of course no such reader appears at all. But what does that have to do with it, after all, I can't live in the mold that you want me to live into, so your snickering at me, the greater emotional factor lies in the fact that you and I are pursuing different purposes, ah, I think it's that simple. After much struggle of thought, it's better to express the ego and not forget to play the ego. Is that paradoxical? Of course the existence of such an oxymoron is what makes thinking meaningful, and if a person does not have an oxymoron in himself, then he is an insensitive person, a walking corpse who has lost the pursuit of the essence of life. It is that simple.
Chang Chang asked me, where is the way back to life? I think the pain is the last way back in life, only pain can make the human will feel the existence of life in the bitter. When people often tell up, "Ah, I feel the world really gray, why is my pressure so big?" In fact, the more successful people are, the more stressful they are. But they always learn to find joy in their bitterness. For example, a president who has a successful career always maintains a peaceful mindset within himself in dealing with people, no matter how many things he has to deal with. This makes him seem more approachable, and more people are willing to contact him. He is not proud of his achievements, but rather his humility is as pure as a newborn baby's. His subordinates are willing to share his burden with him. His subordinates are willing to share his troubles, his friends are willing to have dinner with him***, and his family will be warm and harmonious. The most important thing lies in his control of the mind and the power of expression from the face to reach the height of consistency. His success belongs to a stage of success which is pushing him to a higher level. His return to life is a leap into a constant exploration of the future.
Just like a corner of a square, in the spring of bright weather, some pink artificial production of fake peach trees are put together into a temporary sitting and lying to enjoy a small scene, under the tree put some plastic molded tables and chairs. Some dummies are displayed on the side, and there is also a reclining poet Li Bai holding a wine altar, which is really an idyllic scene for a temporary rest. In the morning at noon or in the afternoon, the people who come and go through, always be y attracted by this small scene, couples kissing on the swing, women with children laughing and taking pictures in front of the tree, the old man with his arms back and slowly move his body to quietly enjoy these "blooming" peach blossoms. While the crowds were enjoying themselves, I noticed an unexpected spring color as I passed by. A real blooming pink peach blossom trees in the small scene not far from the roadside, the peach branch is not like those fake flowers like a lot of loose branches, but it is as thick as a thumb on the branches, but a cluster next to a cluster of fire-like blooming flowers, the breeze, bursts of flowers, the fragrance of the nose, the aroma of the white chocolate melted in the tongue bursting out of the sweet taste. Simply make people inexplicably happy. The peach blossom plant swaying in the wind, seems to be like the pedestrians waving, that delicate posture, like a young girl dancing on the stage, the reddish halo is precisely like a young girl's face blushing color. It is such a peach blossom, but no one asked, no one with it to take a picture, no one to gaze fondly. Only the spring breeze in the accompaniment of it fluttering, in the crowd, but it seems extraordinarily cold and lonely.
If it is also placed under the body of some stone benches, if it was born in a farmer who knows how to appreciate it in the garden, I think it will get some praise, may lead to the crowd of wine song, happy to drink. But it was born there, in an environment where it was hard to tell what was real and what wasn't, and its beauty was obscured by pretense. Its fragrance was purged by the clamor. It is like a weed by the world mercilessly ignored, yet it did not ignore the world, it is still in the wind proudly bloom, why live to others to see it? The best way to do this is to live out your own life.
People can always easily live in the eyes of the public, the designer will be because the requirements of the builder to change the original creative masterpiece, and finally returned to the mediocrity of the people can accept. Creators always write something that can win the attention of the masses of mortal works. The netizens are always trying to attract popularity by acting as if they are angry.
A radish is a radish, an eggplant is an eggplant, and a pepper is a pepper. Eggplant is still eggplant even if it is coated with the light red color of chili pepper, and chili pepper can't become radish even if it is buried in the soil. However, there are always some people who like to think of peppers as eggplants, and there are some people who like to think of radishes as peppers. If a physical object loses its own soul, it loses itself. Yet pepper or eggplant. Both are indispensable ingredients. Flavored eggplants can have a little chili added to them, but you can't lose the eggplant. Why treat the fake as real? False is false, even if you can deceive others, but can not deceive their own hearts. The first thing you need to do is to get your hands on some of the most popular products and services in the world, and you'll be able to do it all on your own.
Where is life? Understand the true self, know their own weight, constantly reflecting on the self, many people's daily state is always in a hurry, looking at it like a chicken blood as hard as the struggle, it seems that the sky will soon be stabbed a big hole. However, day after day, year after year, he is still him, not only the level of thought has not been improved, the world has been dipped in his body and mind painted colorful. Can you be sure that your daily busyness is full of meaning when you have lost the true meaning of yourself? I think everyone should ask themselves when they are alone, if they are busy every day to cover up the real pursuit of the heart, that is not cheating themselves?
I am reminded of Pushkin's "If Life Deceives You":
If Life Deceives You
Don't be sad, don't be anxious
Calmness is needed in the days of melancholy
Believe that the days of happiness will come
The heart is always looking forward to the future
Now it is often melancholy
The time is fleeting, the time is short. Everything is instantaneous
Everything will pass
And that which has passed
will become a dear nostalgia
Life, in the mortal world, will eventually return to itself, to its own heart, to the land, to nature. So, please live as you want to be, even if you are poor, sick and miserable. And it's not about what he sees in you.