On the 30th day, I began to enjoy all the surprises this angel baby brought me.
Yes, we have been in this world for thirty days.
Looking at her enchanting eyes day by day, I forgot about all the toss-ups during the midsummer confinement period, the pain in the nipples that had been bitten a few days ago due to improper latch on, and the previous second. We are still worried about the days and nights in the future when we will not be able to sleep well...
In fact, the reality is far from as bad as we imagined.
I remember the first time I saw her in the operating room, the way the nurse held her in front of me, the madness of breastfeeding for the first time after the operation, and my daughter’s breastfeeding a few days ago. Her calves were always curled up until the fifth day when I saw her lying on her crib and stretching her right leg. I remember on the seventh day, she seemed to be familiar with the home environment and could finally stretch out her calves with confidence.
In the first days, I ate and slept every day, and slept and ate. After a few good days, I started to feel her fussiness (of course, this fussiness is my comparison conclusion under her eating, sleeping, sleeping and eating mode). Just like the night before, she couldn't sleep well after eating. On the one hand, she was worried about whether she had eaten enough. On the other hand, she felt too full and felt uncomfortable. At the same time, she also felt that this was not okay.
In view of the struggle in the previous two nights, I am not sure whether to feed myself or squeeze out a bottle at night? So I asked a friend who provides breastfeeding guidance for advice. I told her that if she felt like feeding herself, she would have to feed her again every two hours at most. My friend suggested that I should feed myself at night, because lactation peaks at night. If I express it, my mother will be tired, my family will be tired, and I will be afraid of nipple confusion. Say what I described is normal. I mentioned that she would squirm around in some unknown situation, and my friend suddenly asked me, what do you think she is doing? Seeing these words, I laughed. I didn't know how to answer her, and at the same time I thought she was so cute. I replied: When you asked me this, I suddenly felt that she was so cute. Here’s another one: My brain tells me that she might not be feeling well after eating. (This sentence was my biggest worry during those nights when she was noisy) My friend replied to me: Yes, how cute. Maybe it’s because you’re hot, you’re tired from eating, or you’re happy after eating, so you twist it, or maybe you want to fart, so you twist it.
Seeing her say this, I seemed to feel something, and I expressed it truthfully: To be honest, I don’t know what’s wrong with her? Before you asked me, I always felt that I might be feeling uncomfortable after eating. But when you asked me just now, my stomach relaxed and I didn’t feel as uncomfortable as I saw.
Then, she told me that children have weak mobility and are not like adults. They can dance when they are happy, take a spin when they are hot, and lie down when they are tired.
Observing children is a particularly interesting thing.
Due to my own reasons, my daughter is not feeding smoothly, but when I say, "one, two, three, big mouth," my daughter will definitely be able to swallow it, even if it doesn't work once or twice, but as long as I She must have understood my instructions. (As I write this, I suddenly feel that it is not easy, and tears flow down my face). And every time I strive hard for it.
I remember clearly that yesterday afternoon we were holding breast milk, and she was sucking the left side. Then she rubbed my right arm with her little feet and kept looking at me, as if she wanted to test what I would do. The reaction was the same. I kept looking at her and smiling at her. She rubbed it four or five times and smiled, then stopped. Then I touched her calf with my elbow, and then stretched out my foot to rub it again. My heart will be melted by her cuteness. This is indeed why breastfeeding is irreplaceable.
After that, I no longer had to worry about whether to feed him by hand or by bottle, and everything took its course. As a result, my daughter didn't make any fuss last night. She ate when she woke up when she was hungry, and went to bed again after eating. Grandma came over twice, and we both lay there and nursed. I woke up once and kicked myself for a while before falling asleep. Look at her heart becoming softer again. Including today, it seems that there is no longer the worries, troubles, worries about sleeping well, worries, etc. that I had before. It turns out that I have always expected her to be a so-called good baby, but I have not accepted her various so-called unbehaved behaviors. And the truth is, no matter what, she is still my sweet baby girl. This is acceptance, total acceptance. Accept her so-called kindness and her so-called trouble. Acceptance brings endless strength and energy.
I sent a message to my friend in the morning to tell him what happened last night. She replied to me: Your stomach is relaxed, your heart is at ease, and the child will be relaxed. When I saw the sentence she wrote above, I burst into tears again. I was either sad, happy or moved.
I am very grateful to my baby, she has been healing me recently
She also said that she can see that I am a mother who pays close attention to my children. After reading her words, she stared at her sleeping daughter and replied that it was from the love that filled her heart. Every mother loves her children. In fact, knowing how to love is also very important.
Babies are gentle angels, little masses, who lead us to meet a better version of ourselves. Thank you for giving us the opportunity to witness her growth and accompany her as well as ourselves.
Everything is the best arrangement. Perhaps these bits and pieces are the best process for me to educate myself.
Thank you, my daughter, for letting me see the infinite power of acceptance.
We love you, my dear baby.