The old man's skin and flesh are loose, and what he does does is not in the right place.
The little rabbit said, "My mother called me bunny rabbit, good to hear!"
Piggy said, "My mom calls me Piggy, and that's nice too!"
Puppy said, "My mommy calls me Puppy Dog, and that's nice too!"
The chick said, "You guys talk, I'll go first!"
The bunny said, "I was raised by a rabbit lady!"
The little pig said, "I was raised by a pig's mother!"
The chick said, "I was raised by the chicken lady!"
The puppy said, "You guys talk, I'll go first!"
The cat said to me, "I'm your grandma's cat, good to hear!"
The dog said to me, "I'm your grandmother's dog, good to hear too!"
The fish said to me, "I'm your grandma's fish, and it sounds good too!"
The bear said, "You guys talk, I'll go first!"
The ronin said, "People call me the ronin, and it's nice!"
The samurai said, "People call me the martial artist, and that's nice too!"
The master said, "People call me the High Man, and that's nice too!"
The swordsman said, "You guys talk, I'll go first!"
The higher mathematics teacher said: I teach higher mathematics this semester,
The university physics teacher said: I teach big matter this semester,
The information management teacher said: I teach capital management this semester,
The socio-economics teacher said: you guys talk, I'll go first.
The door of Lao Zhang's house is made of logs, Lao Zhang said: my house's door is wooden
The door of Lao Li's house is made of plastic, Lao Li said: my house's door is plastic
The door of Lao Wang's house is made of stones, Lao Wang said: my house's door is stone
The door of Lao Liu's house is made of steel, Lao Liu said: you guys talk, I'll go first!
The students of the Teachers College said: I am from the Teachers College
The students of the Vocational College said: I am from the Vocational College
The students of the Air College said: I am from the Air College
The students of the Air College said: I am from the Air College
The students of the Air College said: I am from the Air College
Technical college students say: you guys talk, I'll go first!
The county secretary: "Rabbits, shrimps, pig tails! No more pickles, pickles are too expensive!" (Translation: Comrades, villagers, pay attention! No more speeches, we're in session!) After the county secretary has finished speaking, the host says: "Pickles please, sausages and pickles!" (Interpreter: The prefect will now speak!) The prefect says: "Rabbits, today's meal dogs eat, everyone is a big wanker!" (Interpreter: Comrades, today's meal is enough, everyone make big bowls!) Governor: "Don't want the sauce melon, I'll pick up a piece of shit for you to lick?" (Interpreter: Stop talking, I'll tell you a story.) Governor: This is a story someone might eat. (Interpreter: This is a story someone might know.) Governor: Don't worry if you can't eat it (Don't worry if you can't know it) Governor: I'll lick it for you now.
There was a man whose name was "Du Zitou."
The teacher asked at roll call
"Where is Du Zitou?"
A classmate said, "He has a stomachache."
One day a buck ran faster and faster, and at the end of the run, he became a highway buck (highway).
One day, the teacher took a group of children to the mountains to pick fruit.
She announced, "Children, after picking the fruit, we will uniformly wash it together, and after washing it, we can eat it together."
All the children ran off to pick fruit.
When it was time to gather, all the children gathered.
The teacher: "Xiaohua, what did you pick?"
Small Hua: "I'm washing apples because I picked apples."
Teacher:
"What about you, Xiaomei?"
Siu Mei: "I'm washing tomatoes because I picked them."
Teacher: "The children are all very good! What about you, Ah Ming?"
Ming: "I'm washing my shoes because I stepped in poop."
One day a granny was riding in a car...
Midway through the ride the granny didn't recognize the road ....
The granny hit the driver on the ass with a stick and said: where is this?
Driver: this is my ass ..... With colleagues to the field business trip, local colleagues hospitality, that night will be in a special hotel room set up a banquet to receive the wind. Men and women of a dozen people seated after the non-stop chat, only one person in the food order. The company's main goal is to provide the best possible service to its customers," he said.
This situation, we in Beijing is generally let the lady to point out the name of the dishes reported again. So a Beijing buddy said, "Miss, report."
The lady looked at him and didn't move.
"Miss, report it!" Dude got a little antsy.
The lady's face turned red and she still didn't move.
"What's the matter? You didn't hear me?" Dude was really pissed.
A female colleague hurriedly rounded up: "Miss, you just hurry to report one by one, ah."
Miss mumbled and asked, "That, that ...... just hold the female, not the male line?"
"Pfft!" The side of a female colleague just drank a big mouthful of tea all sprayed on the front side of the person. A dozen people made a mess of laughter, the lady is even more overwhelmed.
The first thing to do is to put on a mixed ramen. A large plate of rappel came up, followed by a few plates of ingredients, sauces, and so on. The lady didn't pay attention when she was serving, and a drop of the sauce spilled on one of his pants. The guy was trying to be funny and asked the lady, "What should we do?"
The lady calmly said, "Do whatever you want."
"Then what do you say?"
"What do you want to do?"
"And what do you usually do here?"
"Why don't I do it for you?"
"Sure."
Just see the lady neatly pour a few plates of ingredients and sauce on the ramen, chopsticks in one hand and a
spoon in the other, and mix it up in a few swipes. Then he said to the guy, "Sir, it's ready to eat."
The guy stared at the plate of ramen with his eyes wide open, and another coworker said "thank you" to the lady for him.
The main course - roasted leg of lamb, a big plate of meat bones, a plate of salt and pepper. A Beijing buddy love this mouth,
No hesitation to grab a leg of lamb, click is a mouthful, croak croak croak eat up. When the lady saw it, she said,
"Sir, you need to dip this."
The man looked skeptically at the lady and then at his local colleague. The local coworker says, "It tastes better dipped."
Buddy then stood up with the leg of lamb and clicked another bite.
The lady rushes over and asks, "Can I get you anything, sir?"
"Huh? No."
"Then please sit down and eat."
The dude muttered and sat down, looking at the group, bewildered. Carefully, he brought the leg of lamb to his mouth and carefully took a bite.
The lady added, "Sir, this needs to be dipped."
Buddy stood up with a flourish, waving the leg of lamb and yelling angrily, "How the hell do you eat it standing up and sitting down at the same time!?"
Wine and food filled the table, the leader hobbled.
The seat rose to welcome, a chilling sound.
The lady who served the banquet next to the very beautiful, new, inexperienced, quite a bit nervous.
All of us were seated, and someone greeted us with, "Miss, tea!"
Miss busy close to the finger point: "1, 2, 3, 4, 5, 6, 7, **** seven!"
The crowd laughed, the leader added: "Pour tea!"
The lady was busy "checking" again: "7, 6, 5, 4, 3, 2, 1, or seven."
Someone asked, "What are you counting?"
The lady hesitated and replied in a whisper, "I'm a dog."
The crowd was furious and shouted, "Call your manager!"
The manager entered, hung his hands and smiled, and asked, "Gentlemen, what's the matter with summoning me?"
Leader said: "Don't ask too many questions, go and check the age of this lady's phases."
The manager was puzzled, and followed the order, and then came the reply: "18 years old, belong to the dog!"
The leader laughed, the crowd laughed. The leader of the sea does not do to pursue, the crowd of elegant inconvenience to pursue.
Miss, the manager fell into five miles of clouds.
Thirty years after the wine, come up with a dish: "Stewed king!"
The people are all happy, but did not forget the rules, someone with chopsticks to dial the head of the eight said: "Leaders move, leaders move!"
Leader looked at the head of the turtle was dialed chaotic trembling, the heart is not happy, both do not want to harmonize the end of the words and do not want to disobey the beauty of the crowd, so it is to hold a spoon to drink soup, said: "Good, good! Everyone please feel free."
Again, someone said: "Yes - the king should drink soup!" The leader was so angry that he almost sputtered.
In a few moments, the soup was about to run out, and something round floated out, asking, "Miss, what's this?"
Miss busy answer: "It's a son of a bitch." The crowd again surprise: "Leader eat first, leader eat first!"
The leader did not hear the "bad luck" words, very happy, called the lady: "Give everyone a share!"
A long time, the lady did not move, the leader angrily asked: "How, this is not clear?"
Miss difficult to say: "seven people, six bastards, you asked me how to share ah?"
The crowd listened, each stretched their necks and stared, full of food, hard to swallow. `