As the saying goes, every family has a difficult lesson to learn. It is also difficult for a clear official to resolve family affairs. The undeniable point is that most grandparents are influenced by traditional cultural practices and believe that bringing up grandchildren is a matter of course. They have been working hard all their lives, saving money, supporting the elderly on both sides of the family, bringing up their children, and then, before they can catch their breath, they worry about their son's marriage and work hard for their grandchildren. A lifetime of dedication to the family. Chinese parents are really the hardest working old people in the world.
As the saying goes, an old man in the family is a treasure. The reality is that there are a lot of harsh elderly daughter-in-law, really disgraceful. A colleague's son is already a teenager, has been in-laws to take good care of. Although she is in the university, but do not have to do research, is the leader of the defense department. She had proudly said that no matter what kind of meals and clothes the grandparents prepared for the child, she did not care, would they harm their grandchildren? If you don't like to see them, you should see less of them, and just treat them as free babysitters. She dresses up every day, invests a lot for herself, skin care products, cosmetics, brand-name fashions and whatnot, laughing that when she was young, people said she looked like Brigitte Lin. This kind of self-centered person you can expect her to filial piety to the elderly, diligently support the children?
And a classmate, in-laws are suburban landless peasants, monthly social security but a thousand dollars. The old man is very diligent, in front of her neighborhood planting vegetables, in order to save money, usually even the bus can not afford to sit. Classmates children were thrown to the elderly management, winter elderly often have to help her snow-white down jacket, cotton jacket washed clean, it is really not easy. These are the kind of daughter-in-law who openly bullies the old man's lack of culture, tolerates generosity, and single-mindedly cares only about her own living style. No matter how well the grandparents take care of their grandchildren and do the housework, they can't get a good word out of them, and if they are not careful and something goes wrong, they will definitely make the whole house uneasy.
There is also a situation where the daughter-in-law is very demanding of the grandparents. Nowadays, even young parents in rural areas attach great importance to their children's learning. Grandparents with children is certainly very hard, but they themselves due to family environment, cultural background, geographical factors, etc., can only bring up their grandchildren in the traditional way. In the view of parents who advocate scientific feeding and demand the cultivation of children's minds, there must be a lot of conflicts of cultural practices and cultivation concepts.
In this case, I think there should be a clear division of power and responsibility, the old man to do his share of the housework, the daily diet by the daughter-in-law generation arrangements, the old man according to the map of the wing can be. As for the child's education, leave it to the children to complete. Because everyone's goal is the same, is to try to raise a qualified, preferably excellent children.
It is undeniable that some old people have some bad habits and are not very enthusiastic and responsible in bringing up children. A friend's mother-in-law is very fond of pulling the strings, once at noon, the friend lunch break, mother-in-law with children. As a result of talking and forgetting, the grandson ran far away and could not be found, fortunately, it is a university campus, the security guard is responsible for. There are also old people like to square dance, every time you take your child out is with a dance partner. My friend told us that many elderly people are actually more playful, which is human nature. They sometimes treat their children as toys and have no sense of nurturing at all. I have also seen elderly people taking their children to mahjong parlors in the community. Imagine how a child would be influenced in such an environment.
The child is always the responsibility of the parents, the old man is only to help, auxiliary role, the relationship must not be reversed. The old man should also learn to let go, only the parents themselves seriously with, will appreciate the old man is not easy.