The standard of daughter-in-law in the mind of the mother-in-law

One, treat your mother-in-law as your own mother.　The daughter-in-law must treat her mother-in-law as her mother before she treats her as her mother-in-law, and she must care for her mother-in-law as sincerely as she cares for her mother. Whether the daughter-in-law is sincere or not, the mother-in-law will soon be able to realize.　 Secondly, you can't blame everything.　Mother-in-law older, a variety of life details on the habit must be quite a lot, as a daughter-in-law, can not take the young people's standard requirements of mother-in-law, asking mother-in-law to do everything perfect, overly critical can only make the conflict intensified.　 Third, not an enemy nor a servant.　In real life, there are many daughters-in-law either as an enemy of the mother-in-law, or her as a servant. Thinking that the mother-in-law is retired at home anyway, taking care of the son's life is supposed to be. It is important to realize that it is only natural for a mother-in-law to take care of her son, but not her daughter-in-law. Especially when she feels that her daughter-in-law intends to make her.　 Fourth, more thinking about the details of life.　Three meals a day is both usual and unusual, some mothers-in-law often praise their daughters-in-law this way: "Daughter-in-law came back from a business trip yesterday, specially for me to bring sugar-free snacks, when are you thinking of me with diabetes." People are old, she felt that you love her performance, is in every little thing to do to make her happy.　 Five, communication has "three more".　Listen more, ask more, talk more. Even if she is long-winded, do not interrupt her; something or nothing, often on the phone, ask your mother-in-law what she needs no, she will rely on you from the inside; every day encountered the big things, try to talk to your mother-in-law, she may not be able to provide you with valuable advice, but the conversation itself can enhance the relationship.　 Sixth, cultivate *** with hobbies.　This point is crucial to the harmonious relationship between mother-in-law and daughter-in-law, meaning that the daughter-in-law should interact with her mother-in-law on a spiritual level. As a young person, daughter-in-law must have their own hobbies, such as singing, dancing, etc., in your hobbies, it is best to occasionally take your mother-in-law to participate in, so that she and you are happy together; at the same time, the daughter-in-law also need to pay attention to the hobbies of the mother-in-law, such as the mother-in-law likes to weave sweaters, you have to take the initiative to praise her craftsmanship, and learn together.　 Seventh, give your mother-in-law some power.　Mother-in-law retired, social relations social status gradually reduced and lowered. At this time, if you can let your mother-in-law be in charge within a certain range, your mother-in-law's psyche will be full of gratitude.　The standard of the daughter-in-law in the mind of the mother-in-law 2 Introducing mother-in-law and daughter-in-law get along skills 1, no matter how unreasonable the mother-in-law, do not quarrel with the mother-in-law Even if the mother-in-law is wrong again, if you once start a war with her, it is your fault. This is not to ask you to be an ostrich, although you are a woman of the new era, you can defy all the stereotypes, but please do not forget that this is in China, this society still can not tolerate disobedient people, although quarrel with the mother-in-law is not necessarily considered disobedient, but in the eyes of the onlookers, as a daughter-in-law of the younger generation, spit in the air with the mother-in-law against, it is disobedient! They will think that you have no family manners! If you say that you have no family education, the target is not you alone, but piggyback on your parents, you want to hear their own parents because of their own reasons to be talked about?　 2, the more miserly your mother-in-law is to you, the more generous you should be to your mother-in-law The people of your mother-in-law's generation have gone through a very difficult time, so there is a kind of miserliness towards money that is difficult to understand for those of us in the 1970s and 1980s. She herself is generally very frugal, and also hope that their son and daughter-in-law and they are the same "a penny broken into two with", especially on the daughter-in-law in this regard will generally be too high requirements, if you buy things for her husband, she may not say anything, but if you are to buy for themselves, she will say you spend money, or that you buy things too expensive! What? This kind of mother-in-law is indeed quite detestable, but the daughter-in-law does not have to compromise herself for this, and she should buy what she wants and spend how much she wants, and she does not have to hold a grudge against her mother-in-law for this reason, thinking that you are mistreating me in this way, and see how I can clean you up in the future. In fact, many mothers-in-law do this in addition to the pain of money, more mothers-in-law is due to psychological imbalance, think of their own previous so much suffering, can not afford to eat, can not afford to wear, the province down to their children, but the result is good, the son married his son's wife has what credit? Now is to eat good, wear good, with good ......, even if the daughter-in-law spend their own money, the mother-in-law will have "their own trees, daughter-in-law cool" feeling. Such a mother-in-law, the best way is: to buy things for their own mother-in-law at the same time to buy a gift, even if it is a very cheap small objects, can block her mouth, although the mother-in-law will still say on the mouth, you do not have to spend money for her, money to save down or something, but the heart will be very happy.　 3, don't say bad things about your mother-in-law in front of your husband We don't like it when mothers-in-law say bad things about themselves in front of their husbands, and similarly, as a mother-in-law, you won't like it when your daughter-in-law chews the cud in your son's ear.　Especially nowadays, many men are very foolish and filial, even if he knows it is his mother-in-law's fault, he will say you just put up with it, it's his mom! (Unfortunately, it seems that many daughters-in-law, including myself, have encountered such a husband who makes you gnash your teeth!) In this case, you will not be able to achieve your goal by bad-mouthing your mother-in-law, and it is more likely that your husband will become disgusted with you. After all, if you love your parents and your husband badmouths them in front of you, can you guarantee that you won't jump up eight feet high? But this does not mean that we have to tolerate the bossy mother-in-law, then we need to use our own wisdom, you can create an opportunity for your husband to see for himself how the mother-in-law is bullying you, if you can, it may be in front of her husband shed tears of aggression, the rest of it, it will be given to her husband to do a good job. If your husband is still so insensitive, then don't be polite, and double the anger your mother-in-law gave you on him! Such a husband if you do not ask him to eat "sandwich cookies" and also full of words, can be too sorry for him this filial piety!　 4, if you live with your mother-in-law, don't run back to your mother's home because of anger. When I wrote this article, I actually envy the sisters who have a mother's home to go back to, because my mother's home is in the field, so basically no mother's home to go back to, but this also saves the parents from worrying. Although sometimes aggrieved to run back to the mother's home, the husband whispered to pick you up home feeling is quite relieved, perhaps your parents will not scold him, perhaps the most will condemn him with a look, but you think about the feelings of the husband did not? If such a number of times, every man will be annoyed, decided not to spoil you this problem, this trick will not work. Especially if you live with your mother-in-law, don't use this tactic if your mother-in-law gives you the message: don't come back after you leave this door! Or if your husband wants to show his authority in front of your mother-in-law by saying this to you, are you going to walk out of the house without looking back or are you going to put down your luggage and go back to your room to cry? Even if you can walk out the door and eventually come back, aren't you afraid that the first thing your mother-in-law will say to your husband after you leave the house is "divorce her"? With the mother of the man living with this situation, even if very much want to stay you, or very much want to take you home earlier, but in order to prove to his mother that he is a man, generally will be swollen face, not only do not stay you will say more desperate words, or not to pick you up at all to go home. At that time you are divorced with him, or pack up their own good home? If you really do not want to live, to divorce with him that is another matter, if you do not want to give him up, you still have to go home, it is not very disgraceful?　Of course, every woman in the case of unforgiving, have the right to leave home, but can not be a little creative, the place of departure to other places? Personally prefer a little upscale hotel, and then call him, said do not want their parents to worry, so live in the hotel to ......, and then order yourself a beautiful meal, eat while waiting for him to come pick you up 吧,huh! I bet 90% of the men will receive this call will be to the hotel to run, after all, every day hundreds of thousands of dollars in spending ah! There are very few husbands or mothers-in-law who don't feel the pain. Maybe the other 10% have money and don't care! Then you run a little farther, such as Hong Kong, such as Paris, such as Hawaii or something ......, so farce once away from home is enough to let him carve his bones, see him next time dare to mess with you not?　 5, do not say bad things about your mother-in-law in front of outsiders Some people may scold me, there is no mistake ah? If you are angry with your mother-in-law, you can't say anything to your husband, and you can't say anything to outsiders, is there any justice? Yes, this seems to be very difficult to do, look at the forum sisters tearful accusations, we know the world as a daughter-in-law how many bitter tears ah! And when my friends get together, the one thing they talk about the most is the evil mother-in-law! Chinese daughters-in-law are bitter! However, the outsiders here are specifically people who know both your mother-in-law and yourself. It's fine to complain in the forum, but if you say bad things about your mother-in-law in front of these people, aren't you afraid that one day your words will be added to and spread to your mother-in-law's ears? Of course, you should not publicize your family's shame, but more importantly, you should not be treated like a sister-in-law, and you should not be belittled. Even if you know that your mother-in-law has spoken ill of you in front of outsiders, do not take an eye for an eye or a tooth for a tooth, for if you do so, what is the difference between you and your mother-in-law who has a long tongue? A smart daughter-in-law will do this: If your mother-in-law says bad things about me in front of people, I will be high profile. Say good things about your mother-in-law in front of people! Don't worry that this will make your mother-in-law accuse you of something. Please believe in the saying that "justice lies in the hearts of the people", as your mother-in-law has made a lot of criticisms of you, but you have repaid the grudges with kindness, so isn't it obvious who is right and who is wrong? When those people pass your words back to your mother-in-law's ears, she will die of shame!　 6, on their own in-laws aggrieved not overly exaggerated Undeniably, each daughter-in-law will be in-laws more or less aggrieved, perhaps the other's unintentional mistakes, perhaps deliberately, many daughters-in-law can not themselves in the heart of the grievances, so they will be thinking about it, the more you think, the more you think they have suffered a great deal of aggrievement, and in the process of each other's mistakes infinitely enlarged, and more and more can not see their own in the event of the incident, the more you will not see your own in the event of the wrong, the more you can not see your own in the event of the wrong. In the process, they will magnify the mistakes of the other party and lose sight of their own responsibilities in the incident.　This may be due to the fact that many daughters-in-law are in a position of isolation in their in-laws' home and have an instinctive sense of defense, so they will react too sensitively to events that concern them. Another situation is that some daughters-in-law have a kind of persecution paranoia, always feel that the other party does not mean well, they are like the clever, beautiful and kind-hearted Snow White, and the mother-in-law is the evil queen, will not stop until she is put to death, so they have a kind of self-pity for themselves. Women are delicate creatures, but sometimes these delicate feelings are seen as "narrow-minded" by the in-laws. I also think that some of the trivial things at home are not worth making a big deal about, the character of the daughter-in-law of the big-headed things in the past for a while will disappear, and the relationship with the in-laws may also be the most harmonious. As long as the in-laws do not have their own personal attacks, personality insults, to some unintentional, or deliberately make a small bad, smart daughter-in-law can pretend not to understand, or laugh it off. So, sometimes you may want to do a smart silly sister, may be happier.　 7, be sure to find an appropriate opportunity to show in front of the mother-in-law the nature of their own tigress People have a kind of weakness, especially now a lot of mothers-in-law. If you are in front of her performance the more meek, the more she thinks you are a soft persimmon can be casually pinched. Of course, you can't fight with her, but it doesn't mean you can't fight with someone else, but it's best not to choose your husband or someone related to her. If you have a chance to catch a bad guy, give him a good dose of power! Even if it is not reasonable to mess around a time, this time to your character in the most evil most ruthless side of the fullest performance, do not be afraid to take the bad name of shrew, shrew on shrew! As long as you can show your mother-in-law that we are not without temper, we do not lose our temper with her not because we are afraid of her, but because we respect her as an elder! The first thing I want to do is to make sure that you have a good understanding of what you are doing and how you are doing it!