I often hear people sigh: "Love is easy to be sad; Because it is difficult to be together, it is difficult to get along. " Yes, it is a great luck to meet the soul mate of life, and it is a kind of wisdom to be together forever. Many people love to the end not because they don't love, but because there are always constant demands, quarrels and suspicions in the process of running-in. Love has become a shackle and a burden.
Therefore, both lovers and couples need to go through these three "precepts" if they want to maintain close relationship for a long time.
1, give up selfishness and willfulness and take care of everything.
In feelings, whether it is love or life, I am most afraid of someone being selfish and reckless and not knowing it. No matter how patient and tolerant the other party is, he takes it for granted. Such a relationship is most likely to be unbalanced, leading to the breakdown of the relationship. In the film and television drama "Growing Up with You", Gu Jiawei and Lin, a couple, seem to see that "the husband makes money to support his family and the wife is beautiful"; In fact, "the husband is bossy and the wife is narrow-minded."
Gu Jiawei is self-centered, his home is clean and tidy, his wife is on call, and his daughter's homework comes first, but he pays little attention to his wife's fatigue and his daughter's growth. Lin was tired of his wayward behavior and turtle hair's personality and had to file for divorce. Gu Jiawei didn't understand his wife's hard work and his thinness until he lost it.
People are always mutual. No matter how good feelings are, they can't stand the long-term overdraft and selfish habits. Even if you can't feel the same way, you should learn to put yourself in the other's shoes. I know the limit of your family, and you know it's not easy for me to do housework. I love you dearly, you care about me, give up selfishness and willfulness, treat each other with a cherish and caring attitude, and let the feelings be warm and lasting in the dull years. Good love is caring for each other and returning with sincerity; Respect and love each other.
2. Give up complaining and choose understanding and consideration.
There is a saying: "Marriage is an apple that has been bitten, and complaining is the gap. You can't narrow the gap. If you keep your heart from rotting, your marriage won't go bad. " It's true. I remember there is a short story in the novel "A Chicken Feather", which is thought-provoking. Xiao Lin was in a hurry to go to work and forgot to put the tofu in the refrigerator, which was broken. When the wife came back from work, she smelled the broken tofu and suddenly flew into a rage and began to accuse her husband of carelessness.
Xiaolin was scolded by the leader for being late for work because he bought tofu in the morning. He was also very angry. He complains that his wife can't tidy up, but only nags. The couple got involved in many trivial matters and quarreled endlessly, which led to war at home. Such examples can be seen everywhere in life. Nobody wants to make a mistake. Since what has happened is irreversible, it is better to understand more. Blaming and complaining blindly will affect the feelings of two people and make family relations worse.
Living under the same roof, it is inevitable that there will be friction. When encountering contradictions, you can resist the blurted blame, say "Never mind", "I understand" and "You have worked hard", warm your heart and understand each other, and the problem will be solved naturally. Far-reaching love is tolerance, accommodation, kindness and perfection. Running a marriage is not easy. May we all forgive others with the heart of forgiving ourselves, be considerate of the people we love, let our feelings heat up new warmth, and let the water keep flowing.
3. Give up unwarranted suspicion and learn to treat each other sincerely.
Unreasonable suspicion can always give birth to many coconut gaps. Maybe yesterday, when you were talking about love stories, you could say goodbye noisily in the blink of an eye. The most tangled feeling is this: doubt when holding, and temptation when heart-to-heart, just like Fan Liuyuan and Bai Liusu in Love in a Fallen City. They met by fate, but they tried again and again and doubted each other. Their relationship was almost unsustainable. Even though Bai Liusu went to Hongkong and went to Fan Liuyuan alone, they still doubted each other's sincerity and intentions.
Until later, when the war was in full swing, Fan Liuyuan didn't leave alone, so he chose to go back and protect Bai Liusu. At that moment when life and death are out of reach, they have no suspicion and appreciate each other. In reality, there are countless deep loves, but they dare not deliver their sincerity with a grain of salt, and finally break up in discord.
There are also countless dull feelings, because they contain the most sincere trust in quiet years, so the rest of my life is stable in the vast sea of people, and it is easy to know each other. When you meet someone who doesn't want to live up to your expectations, you will treat each other sincerely, dispel doubts, open your heart and feel the warmth of dependence and emotional harmony. There is no need to hide, and there is no need to deliberately hide. Two people who are sincere to each other can maintain a good emotional balance and spend their lives together.
Writer Anne Baby said: "Good feelings are accompanied, but they are not bound or entangled with each other. They stood side by side, watching the flowers blooming in the world. Love begins with mutual attraction. If you want to love for a long time, you must know how to give up, give up selfish and willful behavior, and be sincere in everything. Give up the words of accusation and complaint, choose to know the body and tell the truth; Give up the mind of unwarranted suspicion, learn to treat each other sincerely and keep true love. The rest of my life is long, so * * * encourages.