Two. The air-conditioning installer's uniform is very dirty and worn out, but he is still wearing it. I asked him why he had to wear such a uniform. He said, "Last time I didn't wear a uniform, I was tired of pretending to stand and rest for a while, and someone called the police to say I was going to jump off a building."
Three. Feeling unwell went to see a traditional Chinese medicine practitioner and saw the doctor frowning as he took his pulse, so he asked, "Doctor, how's my pulse?" Doctor: "To be honest, it's selling quite ugly."
4. My mom has a problem with grinding her teeth in her sleep. When I was a kid, I didn't know about the teeth grinding thing, one night when I slept with my mom and dad, I suddenly woke up in the middle of the night, looked at my dad next to me and disappeared, and then I heard my mom's teeth grinding, so I thought that my mom ate my dad, and I cried until dawn ......
5. I really envy you ugly people, lost love at least can say "who let me ugly it" to comfort themselves.
Six. A family of three went to a restaurant. After eating, the father paid, and the mother said to the waiter, "Can I pack the leftovers home for the dog?" "Of course you can, please." The son next to her asks, "Do we really need a dog in our house?"
VII. Had a fight with my wife, who ran out on her own in a huff! Four-year-old daughter is still there eating, I scolded her: still eating, your mother do not know where to go! She looked at me and said: they lost their wives, they look for ah.
Eight. Morning dad scolded me, are almost 30 people, but also nothing, all day long know how to play, look at the people of other people's families who are with you in general most of the open company. I said casually, you and Ma Yun also general big it, look at others. Dad suddenly silent, wide-eyed look at me, I am not the time to run ......
9. Last night I found the home wifi was a few people connected, so I changed the account "who will fall in love with me" and then the password changed to "no one", thought this time you have no way out of it. The next morning, I realized that the whole building was connected.
1One day I had a fight with my wife. My son said next to me, don't quarrel, all listen to me, my wife and I are very pleased in my heart, my son has grown up, know to persuade the fight, just at this time, only to see his hand waved, "Ready, noisy!"
Eleven. One day reunion, all said their wages have much higher and higher, asked me when I weakly very few poor on 3000 dollars. We all laughed at me and said that it is indeed pathetic, and finally I added a sentence: wife sent, the scene instant silence ......
twelve. I lost my cell phone, and my mom said: Mom, I want to buy another phone. My mom gave me a blank look and said: just lost it to buy? I'm not sure how much I'm going to be able to afford it.
13. In the shopping mall saw two young people quarrel, the girl is leaving very plain to the boy said: you are the periodic table 51 elements! Then I silently pulled out my cell phone, and found that the culture is really fucking terrible!
14. Just now and his wife was hijacked by criminals. My wife stopped in front of the criminals and said loudly to me: "You run! A person live well!" I was touched while running and asked: "must be alone? I'll marry another one, okay?"
Fifteen. Buy fruit back on the road, two beautiful women to ask my husband for directions, my husband is very enthusiastic about informing, after proudly told me that: I do not know how it is, always have a beautiful woman to ask me for directions. I said: Maybe you look like a guide dog it ......
Sixteen. A rich man lying in his hospital bed, said to his sons and daughters, who were waiting around for the inheritance to be divided, "I think I'm getting better." One of his sons asked, "How do you know that?" The rich man said, "I notice that your expressions are getting worse every day."
XVII. One day, a three-year-old son said to his mom, "Mom, what does it mean to be beautiful?" Mom said, "A beautiful woman like mom is called a beautiful woman." The dad next to him whispered, "Don't mislead your child's aesthetics!"
Eighteen. Today the police station caught a thief, the police asked the thief what you stole, the thief said stole a pickaxe, broom, dustpan. The police directly to the thief a big mouth, you can not steal a TV, fan? Can't you steal something I can write? The police have been able to get a few words out of the man who was in charge of the program.
19. The hospital encountered a father and son, the son to get a shot. The son cried a landslide, swore not to take the injection "pain ah, pain". The father's heartache son, kindly advised that "good ah, obedient, or else, a moment to be beaten than the injection is more painful ......"
Twenty. In the supermarket, the old Li, as usual, crowded into the scene of an event. The salesperson said: Thank you, how can I help you? Lao Li said: I'm here for the tasting. Salesperson: Sorry, we are selling pig feed, people are not allowed to taste test ......21. Man: have been chasing you for so long . Do my girlfriend! Woman: We don't have a chance, don't chase! M: I don't understand, why? Woman: Close relatives can't get married, it's fruitless to talk about it! M: What close relatives? Woman: we all have a **** the same mother, the name is China!