01
Friends circle, there is a college roommate often sunshine happiness. Every day, she sends out a circle of friends, all the family's daily dynamics, sun selfie, sun baby, sun husband.
The roommate and her husband were a campus couple and got married as soon as they graduated.
They were in a relationship that was not well received, both being only children and born in different cities, and her parents would not have approved of her marrying far away. Often I heard my roommate on the phone with her parents, arguing over the issue.
Originally, I thought that they would break up after graduation, who knew that the boy convinced his parents to come to the city where his roommate was, bought a house, settled down, and put down roots. There are not many men who can make such a decision. The roommate's husband doted on her for all to **** see.
However, just a month ago, the roommate suddenly do not more daily dynamic, and then update the dynamic, surprisingly, is the sun divorce certificate, the reason for people are very surprised, surprisingly, her husband cheated.
02
The people who know them, can't understand this move of theirs.
From her circle of friends, we can clearly see that this girl's husband, spoil her spoiled beyond words. Throughout the year, big and small festivals, will send gifts to her, never stingy, they have 2 children, but also specially invited aunts to help take care of, for fear of tiring the girls.
People can't figure out how such a wife-favoring fiend can cheat on his wife.
Marriage, it is undeniable that the spoiled devil does love his wife, but the feelings of this kind of thing, pay attention to is reciprocity, pay and return is not out of balance, once the balance is lost, it is easy to mentally unstable, make people surprised at things.
When the man began to favor the woman, and the woman did not grow with him *** with the time, the progress of that person, will be dumped in place of that person.
03
Mrs. Zhang (a pseudonym) has suffered the same marital problems, only they haven't gone so far as to get a divorce, and in her words, it's not far from that.
Mrs. Zhang's husband is obedient to her and never rebels against her, no matter what she says or does, her husband is unconditionally supportive. Her husband is so good to her and coaxes her to be happy, and she never cares about what he does outside.
Mrs. Zhang is 42 years old and has been married for 16 years, and her two children have grown up to understand that they don't need to worry about their studies, and she only needs to help them with their lives, cooking, washing clothes, etc.
Mrs. Zhang has been married for 16 years, and her two children have grown up to understand that they don't need to worry about their studies.
Whenever she is at home, she is raising flowers, shopping in the supermarket, dancing, and women of her age, many of them are still in the workplace, back home, but also to take care of a family, so many friends are envious of her married to a husband who can earn money, love her, and do not have any requirements for her.
She also felt honored to have such a good husband, love themselves, love themselves, who thought, such a good man, but behind their backs derailment looking for women, was seen by others, told Ms. Zhang, she felt incredible at the time, which did not have any signs of derailment, who can accept?
When Ms. Zhang questioned her husband, he did not have a word of explanation, so she threatened him with divorce, and he said directly, "As long as you are happy, how can I." He cried and cried and made a scene, but to no avail, he still did what he wanted to do.
Mrs. Zhang said: "He has been good to me for 16 years, I never thought of the future days, to be separated from him. Now, he has this attitude, divorce and I do not have the ability to take care of themselves, I can only cook and do housework, with children, I have not even gone out to work.
Marriage is now in flux, and I simply don't know how to cope? But if he is bent on having his own way, our marriage won't work after all, and there's no way I'll accept a threesome."
Mrs. Zhang's feelings are very understandable, the general life, the woman who is favored, it is easy to lose themselves, wholeheartedly dependent on their husbands, once their husbands change their hearts, for the change of the marriage will not be able to accept, away from or not, difficult to make decisions.
To this, the counselor gave Ms. Zhang analytical advice:
Now it seems that your husband is determined that you can not leave him, you have always been dependent on him, need to raise him, he is certain that you away from him will not be good, so that for their own cheating behavior, he did not feel anything, much less feel that it will affect the marriage. As long as he doesn't mention divorce, everything is fine.
The best state of marriage is to respect each other, love each other, not, he paid money can do whatever he wants, on this principle of inequality, the day is not good at all.
You must have your own position, accept the changes in the marriage, cheating this kind of thing, if you don't have an attitude, the days after, you will be full of grievances, simply not good. Instead of that, you should make a decision right away.
You have clearly informed him that you can't accept his cheating, and if he doesn't make a change, this day is not going to last. The child is now old enough to have his own opinion, and his behavior will definitely make him lose his image as a father in the child's mind, and when he grows old and has nothing to live for, then he will want to regret it, and no one will give him a chance.
You can accept to repair your marriage, learn more marriage management skills, rebuild trust with him, but definitely will not accept a 'threesome' relationship.
Look at his reaction, if he does not agree, still maintain the current status quo, you do not be pessimistic, to protect their legitimate rights and interests, to get their own property, and remember not to be angry, do not want anything on the go.
No matter how the final result, remember, no matter when, the woman can not give up self-growth, independent and confident up, will not be looked down upon by others.
Don't put all the expectations of life, are remembered in the partner, you only give yourself enough security, with the partner to unify the pace, even if the change occurs, you also have the courage to undertake, will not be so confused, do not know what to do, their own value to improve, in order to get a person to continue to respect and care.